- Prof. Crocodile
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there are like a dozen great images in the sign thread, but i'm submitting this one
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Aug 24, 2020 03:32
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May 4, 2024 21:21
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Nier: Automata was full of poo poo. Cyborg do not have tiddy
If the cyborg doesn't have tiddy you just need to drink more until it looks like it do
e: trashed crew is always solutions-oriented
Prof. Crocodile fucked around with this message at 15:01 on Aug 28, 2020
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Aug 28, 2020 05:00
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Greek guy: check out this triangle math i figured out
Me: wow drat that's genuinely amazing
Greek guy: i even correctly worked out the diameter of the earth with it
Me: holy crap that's impressive
Greek guy: the triangles are in your brain too i can get them out
Me: um
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Sep 20, 2020 18:23
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- Prof. Crocodile
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from the duke nukem quote thread
No matter how much rear end I kick, I can't escape this gumless hell
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Oct 2, 2020 17:32
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- Prof. Crocodile
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"mum, you'll never guess but lowtax sold the forum.... No lowtax..no you don't know him...wait no I don't want to talk to dad...*under my breath* gently caress"
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Oct 10, 2020 17:39
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- Prof. Crocodile
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i think preprep was setting this joke up for weeks before he finally got a chance to land it
the 7-11 had four different flavors of four loko. they're charging $3.50 a can.
in the UK?!
the united kingdom of oregon
I got u confused with the voice of labour sorry bud
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Oct 15, 2020 02:22
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- Prof. Crocodile
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from the '2020 sheep and wool festival' thread
*border collie frantically trying to keep the sheep 6 feet away from each other*
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Oct 20, 2020 23:56
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- Prof. Crocodile
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This post is not necessarily laugh-out-loud funny, but there is so much right about it that I think it belongs here.
one time i got a chicken quesadilla at taco bell and they ran out of normal cheese so they subbed in the melted nacho cheese and it was so delicious but i've been too embarrassed to order it like that again on purpose.
i think about that quesadilla often. this was in 2014
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Nov 11, 2020 23:38
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Asking the officer at the Ramstein airforce base like
Du
Du hast
Du hast taco bell
Du hast taco bell
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Dec 15, 2020 23:28
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- Prof. Crocodile
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From the "kicked out of Starfleet" thread:
Performed the procedure to separate DickButt back into Lt. Dick and Mr. Butt, despite his right to continue living as an individual.
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Jan 8, 2021 02:50
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Such a perfect riff on movie night.
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Jan 15, 2021 00:45
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- Prof. Crocodile
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listen all y’all it’s a decoupage
iiiii cant stand it
I know you planned it
that picture of kate
you cut and paste
on the side of used tin can of peach jam
where you can keep your loose pencils and pens in
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Jan 18, 2021 22:22
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- Prof. Crocodile
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still might edit this but it had to be done
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Feb 20, 2021 07:17
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- Prof. Crocodile
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I will only appear on tv with my real kin. and if anybody claps or laughs they're in for it.
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Feb 20, 2021 23:49
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Original music and lyrics by Neil Diamond?
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Feb 23, 2021 23:41
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Mar 10, 2021 06:00
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- Prof. Crocodile
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was trying to decide which post from this saga to put in here, but they were all beautiful in their own way so I choked.
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Apr 4, 2021 21:44
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Doc says I got the wet bone. May not have long to live.
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Apr 23, 2021 13:20
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- Prof. Crocodile
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visit something awful dot com, home of the 3,000 word family matters season 8 effortpost.
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May 23, 2021 13:23
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Hot take: Tots are the ikea furniture of deep fried potatoes.
11 pm drunk off my rear end trying to assemble my Kljörn tater tot, decide to totally ignore the pictorial warning on the instructions not to use power tools
I'm the drawing of the guy on the phone with the IKEA help desk crying and begging them to save his marriage because he lost the most important piece of the Tåtör, the very small cube that looks a bit like a burnt piece.
Prof. Crocodile fucked around with this message at 13:32 on Jun 9, 2021
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Jun 9, 2021 13:29
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- Prof. Crocodile
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I'm on the strongest birth control of all *sits backwards in chair* abstinence!
Also years of sitting in chairs backwards has destroyed my testicles' ability to produce sperm.
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Jul 28, 2021 03:45
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- Prof. Crocodile
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from the 'live mas' thread:
Buddy this is My Big Day and if you think I'm not keeping the sauce bouquet you're Doritos Loco
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Oct 11, 2021 22:47
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Hey baby ditch that STring cheese and get with this STRONG cheese
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Jan 20, 2022 22:28
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- Prof. Crocodile
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May 28, 2022 02:03
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- Prof. Crocodile
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The third chopstick just sits on the side watching the other two get it on with the food and the mouth. The cuckstick.
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Dec 10, 2022 00:54
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- Prof. Crocodile
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Not sure if I'm dead or a vampire or just looking at the mirror wrong... wait I think this is just a window...
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Dec 21, 2022 17:18
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May 4, 2024 21:21
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- Prof. Crocodile
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From the thread about eating grapes...
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Mar 26, 2023 17:08
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