- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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Either that, or it's pathetic.
Submitter spotted.
So are $2 notes really uncommon (because ????????) in the US or is the manager just really dim
They're pretty uncommon in the US, to the point where, if I'm remembering right, some researchers have convinced strip clubs to only make change in them to track how money flows through that community.
Anil Dikshit has a new favorite as of 04:38 on Apr 17, 2016
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Apr 17, 2016 04:32
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Apr 29, 2024 05:06
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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My brother was really into D&D when he graduated high school, and was trying to get money together to build a computer for college, so I put three rolls of gold dollar coins into a crown royal bag and gave him a bag of gold for graduation, rather than just giving him a check.
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Apr 17, 2016 20:41
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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STDH from our own forums: ask/tell:
This story is a rehash from an old thread I had about hustling dummies at the pool table. I learned everything I know about pool hustling from my uncle. We use to run cons in dive bars all over the place all the time when we were on the road hustling. This is my favorite con that we use to pull because it worked almost every time.
My uncle would drop me off at this dive bar and I would walk in and bring my pool stick and just start shooting. Get a few drinks, shoot around, ask some people to shoot for drinks and start a very good repor with the bar. Hopefully I could get some people to who were interested in shooting pool. We would shoot friendly games for drinks and I would make sure to never lose and just keep winning and showing my best moves. After a an hour or 2 or maybe 3 depending on how things are going Frank walks in. Frank is a master at acting drunk so much so that he has fooled me a few times just to get me to drive home. So he walks in already drunk and he sits down at the bar and starts drinking and making sure everyone there can hear him talk. He is loud, obnoxious, annoying and just a straight up rear end in a top hat. After he has had a few drinks he will walk over and just watch me shoot. He starts poo poo talking my pool play and telling me what I am doing wrong and we get into a little discussion that turns into pissing contest. I tell him to grab a stick and lets play for some drinks, he laughs and says he only plays for money. I tell him I don't gamble for money like that and I eventually walk away from the table and sit at the bar. He grabs the stick and starts shooting and proclaiming that he is the best everyone is afraid him and that sort of thing. Now the regulars are getting mad because he has ruined the good vibe in the bar I had going. I get mad and tell him to cool it no one wants to hear his bullshit. He gets in my face and calls me a coward because I won't gamble with him. I tell him if I had any money on me I would shut him up right now. He laughs and just continues his parade of assholishness. He keeps harping on the gambling thing.
Right around this time hopefully someone will come to my rescue and stake me. Usually a guy will come up to me and say hey I'll give you 20 bucks to gamble with the guy and shut him up so I will take that 20 and say alright how about we gamble for 20 and Frank will just laugh and say something like he doesn't even pick up a stick for less than a 100 and I go back to the guy and give him his money and tell him what Frank says. Hopefully I have done my part and these guys are sucked in because then they start to go around the bar and raise some money for me to shut him up. Usually its around 200 or so depending on the area. I have had a few times where it got up over 1k. After they raise the money I tell Frank to lets gamble and I proceed to lose it all to him in an amazing acting performance that should get me some award but I have perfected the art of taking a beating at the pool table without it looking like it was my fault. Frank leaves I stick around and apologize and then after an hour or so I leave and meet up with Frank down the street or wherever.. When I was younger and on the road hustling we could do that maybe 6 times a month and have all my hotels and food paid for from those cons so we could drive to the next town looking for a pool hall to hustle more dummies.
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Apr 18, 2016 23:22
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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My favorite part of that one is the assumption that a shopping-mall chain restaurant like Ruth's Chris has got to be pretty much the best steakhouse in a gigantic booming city in loving Texas of all places
That's the most believable part, that that motherfucker is convinced it's the best.
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Apr 19, 2016 02:52
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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Forums grown STDH: Askme about pool hustling:
When I was 22 I was on the road with my 2 uncles Frank and Mike and we decided to stop at this biker bar in Virginia that my uncle had to been in his younger days. Don't remember the name of the bar but it was a wild one. I Remember walking in and it being very dim and smokey with a very strong stench of something dead or rotting. We walk in and it's packed and the whole place is dark except one little area in the back with a light hanging over a pool table. An old man with a beard and durag on was playing and I stepped up and asked if the table was open and he told me to grab a stick and lets shoot. I ask him if he likes to shoot for fun or money and he said money is the preference here. He knew right away I wasn't from there and he called me out on it. I smirked and said nothing and he said let start off with 20 a game. I lose the first 5 games to him and then tell him let me get a shot to win it all back. He agrees to play me one more match double or nothing. I figure now was the time to turn it on and start winning. I easily run out and he says run it again. He racks I break and run again putting me up 200. I ask him if he wants to run it again and he says yes but this time he wants to run it for 500. I tell him okay. He racks I break and miss and he almost runs out but misses on the ball before the 8. That leaves the table wide open and I win again. Now I am up 700 and feeling very cocky and my ego kicks in. I start talking a little trash to the old man. Making jokes about his age and so on and he gets a little frustrated and walks away. I Walk over to where my uncles are and start bullshitting with them and after a few minutes the old man walks back up and says he wants to shoot again. I tell him well you called me out so now you are gonna see what I can really do. Let's play for 1k. He thinks about it for a minute and he says ok but only if the loser kisses norma I tell him Ill kiss any woman in here after I win I don't give a poo poo. At this time about 6 or 7 of his friends start cheering and laughing. A little confused but I am in the zone and not thinking about that and start focusing on the break.
I get ready to break when there is quite a commotion coming from the back. I hear people laughing and girls start screaming and then like some type of magic the room just spreads and in all it's glory there was Norma. A huge loving gross pig that has one eye scared up and I swear was drooling and looked like it had a serious mental issue. I was afraid of that pig and I have no loving clue why now that I think back on it I had never seen one up close before only on tv and stuff and it just loving shook me. I didn't want to make out with a pig what loving disease would I get, would it bite me I had no loving clue. The dude got into my head and I made a terrible break and out of nowhere he ran all the balls out like a pro and the whole loving bar cheered. I walked over to frank white as a ghost almost sick to my stomach. I remember I instantly got indigestion and my stomach was burning because I was so stressed out not from losing 1k but having to follow through with this stupid pig kissing. Frank looked at me and said kid you got hustled and then asked if anyone had a camera he could buy off them because he wanted a picture of this moment. Thankfully no one did and after everyone calmed down the old man walked up to me I gave him 1k and asked how much more could I Pay to get out of it. He said there wasn't enough money in the world. I said gently caress it lets do this and walked over to the pig. I kneeled down and just as I was about to kiss a loving pig the old man stopped me and took a big bucket and put in front of the pig. Then every single person in the bar poured there opened beers into the bucket. instantly the pig just started lopping that poo poo up. I couldn't take it I was gonna puke for sure. They forced the pig to stop drinking and I leaned in and grabbed the pig by it's face and as soon as I got close enough he gave me a huge tongue bath all over my face and I puked in the bucket. Everyone went nuts as soon as I stood up the pig started eating from the beer and vomit fulled bucket and I threw up again on the floor. The last thing I remember was drinking a bottle of Jack and passing out in the back seat of my uncles car while they partied with the biker guys and the next morning I received and endless amount ball busting for that.
Tried it once and didn't like it. My good friend and previous bookie loves that stuff and won a trip to meet Jordy Nelson. I am not a knowledgeable sports guy I love my home teams and I love football but not enough to know every player. It's just not for me but I have nothing against it.
I would say maybe about 50 percent of that movie is accurate. The everyone has a nickname thing is spot on because everyone does. I very rarely call people by their real names. I went to wedding recently and it had assigned seating by name and some people were pissed because they thought they were sitting with strangers but it turned out they were sitting with their poker friends they just never knew their real names. The underground clubs in that movie were based on New York and I have never been to one of those so I am not sure how accurate but I have been to few underground poker games and usually they are just in a guys office or a vacant building or some place like that. I started playing in the back of a cigar store and I play a game right now that runs in the kitchen of a lebanese restaurant. I am one of the few who speak really good english there at that game but it's a goldmine for me because those guys have no clue how to play poker.. The play and personality of the different types of people at poker games was real good in my opinion.
I have no clue what this means. Craps is not a huge part of my gambling but when I do I only bet on the inside number 5,6,8,9. I bet those during a roll and adjust accordingly and I am a loser overall at the craps table. Looking at my spreadsheet craps last year in 2015 was about 5 percent of my gambling. Craps is more of a social thing with my gambling. I only play it if a roller is hot or I am there with a few friends.
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Apr 26, 2016 04:08
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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More gambling stories STDH from these forums:
I have been to a few underground games where I felt like it wasn't on the up and up but I never felt cheated. Just felt like if I had a big winning session I might get robbed leaving the place. The thing is with the underground games is I have to be vouched most of the time and the person who would vouch for me would be someone I absolutely trust. the group of guys I know from poker knows everyone else so if someone was sending players to a game that was rigged they would be blacklisted and most likely bad things would happen to that person depending on who they screwed over.
About 7 or 8 years ago I was at a personal friends home game were something crazy happened.
I know it's offensive to say this word anymore but I don't know how to post this so I will abbreviate it to lilf for sakes of the story.
Lil fag is a guy I have known for a long time when he was in college he use to come to the cigar store and always lose his grant money in our games. He got his name because he has a short man syndrome and he just has this all around machismo about him but really short and very sensitive about being short so naturally we always made short jokes. He got really upset because someone called him a fag then it just became customary to call him lilf. He hated it but he wanted always wanted to gamble and wasn't bad at it. It was just very easy to get him on tilt and make bad decisions. So after he graduates med school he decides he is going to have a game. He invites some of us old timers and he has a really good game. I would go there and the action would be great lots of loose play and people who did not care about money. I use to bring 5k at the game because I wanted to stay all night and if I hit a couple of rough patches I had a big bankroll. This one night i get to the game about an hour after it starts and I notice a younger kid I have never seen before and he is nervous and I think sweet new blood. We play for awhile and the new guy keeps leaving to go smoke and coming back and he does this like 4 times in about 2 hours so it looks la little off. Then we hear a knock at the door lilf looks through the peephole and its the kid as soon as lilf unlocks the door 2 guys in black ski mask burst through the door with AK's and the kid with his hands up. They line us up including the kid on the far wall take all our money jewelry cells and wallets. I lost my cell and 5k in cash I did not have a wallet on me because I don't carry it in those places and I don't wear any jewelry so they got nothing from me there. Then they make us take off our pants and shirts and shoes they gather them all up in a trash bag the one guy pulls out this pepper spray cannister and sprays us all and they bolt.. I figure at most they got was about 25k to 30 k I can't quite remember the value of what they got.
As soon as they leave lilf washes his eyes runs next door and calls the cops before the cops even come I have already accused the kid of being in on it. He swears he has nothing to do with it but he was the only new guy plus he was nervous all night and acting strange. Cops come take everyone's statement and pretty much everyone thinks the kid had something to do with it. Cops find the bag of clothes and wallets that night on the side of the highway. Less than a week later the cops arrest the kid and he gives everyone up. He said he owed these 2 brothers money from a gambling debt and he told them about the game and helped them plan the robbery. His girlfriend was the getaway driver and they all got caught and went to jail. I never got my 5k back but I was there when they were sentenced and I cheered when they found guilty because gently caress them.
The last bet I made was the 1k on the cavs -7.5 in fact my last 6 bets are on the cavs or at least a cavs player and I won all of them. I have a really good bluff story but I need to ask the other player that was in the hand because I completely forget what the hand was and how it played out. Once I get ahold of him and he relays the hand to me I will post the bluff story.
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May 6, 2016 06:17
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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I'm 90% sure only one goon ever has had sex with a human being, and he got demodded for it
Goddamn
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May 8, 2016 21:50
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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"After my parents got home and noticed that the back door was kicked in and hanging from one hinge, the asked me what happened. I began to explain the whole massacree with 4-part harmony and they stopped me. They said "did you get a police report?" So I proceeded to tell them of the bayonet, and they stopped me, and said "did you call the police?" I said no. They then started yelling at me, ME, ME! The hero of the tale because homeowners' insurance wouldn't pay to replace our 3500 dollar door. They sold my car to pay for it."
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Jun 4, 2016 14:22
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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that's like the Stephen King story where the guy traps the other guy in a porta potty and leaves him there to die
For the love of God, Dagneau!
Yes, deepenau, for the love of God!
And he didn't know it, but that was the last time, they would see each other alive again.
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Jun 4, 2016 23:23
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- Anil Dikshit
- Apr 11, 2007
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These are hilariously bad all around, but for some reason the following line stuck out as especially bad
Agh, how do you mess that up?
99% sure she was trying to say it in the style of the Doctor from Doctor Who
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Jul 13, 2016 18:34
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Apr 29, 2024 05:06
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Apr 17, 2016 04:32
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