Battlefield 5: My wife and I walked down the aisle to the Terminator theme

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Battlefield 5: My wife and I walked down the aisle to the Terminator theme

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TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Ran into a fantastic bug tonight where I literally couldn't do damage with vehicles. Tried both an arty truck and a heavy tank, hit enemy vehicles dead-on multiple times from about five feet away, and nothing. Of course this didn't affect the enemies at all. real A+ stuff dice :thumbsup:

Seriously look at this poo poo. No hit marker, no vehicle damaged notification, no ricochet sound, nothing. I don't know how much more of a direct hit I can make.

http://i.imgur.com/Pm3QMnp.gifv

# ¿ Jan 6, 2017 09:26

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 05:32

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

http://i.imgur.com/6k6Kq6m.gifv

# ¿ Jan 6, 2017 19:40

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

FastestGunAlive posted:

Digging trenches would be cool but hard as hell to program (throwback shoutout to red faction tho)

What they should have is an item, probably for support, that is a basic sandbag set up you can throw down. Couple sand bags on either side that you can go prone behind and have some cover to shoot from. Similar to the sniper's metal shield except anyone can use it and it's not a sniper item so it's relevant

Except then you'd have to consciously choose the sandbags over ammo, limpet charges, and a goddamn grenade crossbow. So nobody would ever take it.

Trench digging sounds cool but in practice it would just be one of two things: useless in modes like Conquest where points change hands all the time, or an unfair advantage for defenders in attack/defend modes. I mean I guess it would contribute to that REAL WWI EXPERIENCE, but nobody wants to play a mode where you have to run across an open field while the defenders get to sit in hidey-holes and fire on you with near-impunity nonstop.

# ¿ Jan 9, 2017 23:53

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Maybe it's just me but I can't get into using the Hellrigel as Assault. It feels like I'm spraying all over the place and running out of ammo constantly.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 22:03

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

RCarr posted:

That's weird because it's super accurate and has a large magazine.

What I meant is that it feels like I'm always running out of reserve ammo because of all the spraying. I know that 60/60 is the same number of total rounds as other SMGs, but seeing that I have less than one full mag in reserve always makes me twitchy.

# ¿ Jan 10, 2017 22:39

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Laminator posted:

So anybody ever experience the glitch of being trapped on a field gun and not being able to get off? This happened on the one overlooking C on the American side of Argonne.

I haven't had it happen myself but two of the guys I play with have had it happen on that exact gun. Does it happen anywhere else?

# ¿ Jan 18, 2017 05:24

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

FastestGunAlive posted:

Yea I don't want 32 on 32 rush. What a poo poo show. Although so many easy arty truck kills....

12 v 12 is too weak as it stands. Upping each side to 18 might be good enough.

16v16 in BF4 always seemed to work out decently well.

Also I don't see why they wouldn't be able to put Frontlines on the original maps. Pretty much every map has a linear sequence of points you could use.

# ¿ Jan 24, 2017 23:55

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

I was probably going to die regardless but seriously look at the distance on this bullshit:

http://i.imgur.com/U1faoSB.gifv

# ¿ Jan 26, 2017 21:20

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

hell yeah

http://i.imgur.com/GanSWW6.gifv

Out of curiosity, when are you Xboners usually playing? I usually play with my RL buddies late at night PST so I don't see many of you, but I'm looking to change that.

# ¿ Jan 30, 2017 23:27

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Live At Five! posted:

So I just did the math on how much more xp I need to reach rank 100 and it's absurd. I'm rank 88 and in total I have 8.6 million score. I need 11.4 million or so score. I realize they did that because there isn't prestige or anything like that but drat that's a lot of xp

Just wait until the expansions add ranks 101-140 :shepface:

It is interesting to me that I have literally never seen a rank 100 player though. Even with the absurd amount of XP you need, I figured there'd at least be a small population of sperglords that reached 100 after week 1, let alone after three months.

# ¿ Jan 31, 2017 01:07

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Ol Standard Retard posted:

I remember this from BF3, I'm assuming it's an equally contrived and idiotic measure in this game because DICE!

I'm 340 units skilled!

I'm 385 units skilled scrub :smug:

Also, in looking my skill up, I found this on the front page of the Battlefield site. Really, DICE? :raise:

# ¿ Feb 3, 2017 20:30

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Auxiliary Treats posted:

If only there was a stats site where everyone could compare numbers...

I think the old Battlefield Goons page used stats from BF4stats.com, but for some reason BF1stats.com has never come online. There's a page but all it's said for the last few months is "we're working on a BF1 site, it'll be up soon."

# ¿ Feb 3, 2017 21:24

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

This was completely accidental but I'm going to brag about it anyway :smug:

http://i.imgur.com/VOXkZYi.gifv

# ¿ Feb 5, 2017 10:59

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Live At Five! posted:

Flare gun blind or whatever it is. I don't think I've ever even seen it be used

Do they even do damage?

# ¿ Feb 7, 2017 21:27

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

FastestGunAlive posted:

Flash bang nades were great in bf4. Pubbies spam the poo poo out of them on locker but I've found them very effective in almost every map.

IIRC there was also a glitch in BF4 that made flashbangs set off C4 in their radius, so you could use them to get flashbang kills on tanks :haw:

# ¿ Feb 7, 2017 22:52

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Oh hey, http://bf1stats.com is active now. Number porn time!

# ¿ Feb 9, 2017 10:09

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Apparently now if you join a server and it changes maps while you're loading, the next map will never finish loading in. Quality stuff DICE :thumbsup:

# ¿ Feb 16, 2017 07:30

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Make Battlefield 1 Great Again. Arty truck all snipers.

http://i.imgur.com/Xc8lAu5.gifv

Bonus: I'm in an enemy arty truck :haw:

# ¿ Feb 17, 2017 19:35

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

I AM THE MOON posted:

I am way more down with this than I expected to be.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2017 23:19

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Parkingtigers posted:

Noticed that the new French tank is also available for the other side, and regular heavy tanks were still in service. Wondering if that means it might just function as a heavy tank variant and may be available for others. Guess we'll see.

Aren't all the heavy tanks some German variant, no matter which country you're playing on? Wouldn't surprise me if the same was true for the St. Chamond.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 01:12

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Auxiliary Treats posted:

If pubbies don't notice the skulls popping up right by them, that's fine with me. (RIP me that I didn't get the 3rd tag)

https://gfycat.com/UnequaledSilentIchidna

Stabbing every sniper in sight? You're doing God's work :patriot:

EDIT: Not noticing skulls on the minimap is one thing, but it always baffles me when a sniper doesn't notice the AUUUGH*STAB*GHHHH*STAB**STAB* sound effect playing right next to them.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 05:30

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Did some sick flame dodging earlier tonight :madmax:

http://i.imgur.com/mkNLD6D.gifv

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 09:40

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

e.pilot posted:

I live for moments like this.

Back in BF4 my friends would call this "the engineer game". Engineer runs up to enemy tank and starts repair tooling it, enemy driver (also an engineer) gets out to kill him, first engineer gets in the now-empty tank, enemy former driver starts repair tooling it, first engineer gets out to kill him... Repeat until one is dead.

The tanker class gets a repair tool, right? You could probably have a similar thing happen in this game.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 20:04

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

RCarr posted:

You'd think most people would be smart enough to know to just drive away and then shoot the enemy plinking away at your tank for 3 damage per swing, rather then get out. But hey, pubbies gonna pub.

Yeah, I guess in BF4 engineers also had launchers so running away in the tank was just asking to get rocketed. Not much point in doing anything besides driving away in BF1.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 21:56

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

High Impact Horse Action

http://i.imgur.com/E54KfJY.gifv

# ¿ Feb 23, 2017 23:14

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Sometimes, you and your squad buddies get concrete proof that no, pubbies really are that much worse than you.

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 09:01

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Raskolnikov2089 posted:

I was babbling about this the other day. I killed the same tanker 3 times in a row, from roughly the same area. Never once did it occur to the guy to look for me. Every time he was just focused on charging in for easy infantry kills.

I don't get that mindset. You have a tank, your opposite in number must exist, why not at least look out for him?

The only thing I can figure is that for him, those 6-7 kills he got before I blew him up represented an amazing killstreak, so why do anything different?

"Why are pubbies so loving stupid" is one of the great mysteries of our time :shrug:

# ¿ Feb 28, 2017 21:28

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Parkingtigers posted:

I am sad to report there is no service star for the bayonet.

There's one for every other melee wapon though! I've got one for the cavalry sword, one for the hatchet, and three for the Bedouin dagger. :madmax:

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 21:41

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

I AM THE MOON posted:

no pickaxe? bad taste

I really want to like the pickaxe and hatchet (because god drat they're satisfying when they work), but if you're a melee maniac like me the knives are just straight-up the best option. They're fast and by far the easiest to kill with.

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 21:53

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

If "stabbing more enemies to death, not less" is wrong, I don't wanna be right. :black101:

# ¿ Mar 2, 2017 22:22

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

How is it physically possible to be this oblivious :psyduck:

http://i.imgur.com/MYCZSC5.gifv

# ¿ Mar 10, 2017 09:02

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

From a buddy: no no no no YES!!!

http://i.imgur.com/4fiGYSH.mp4

# ¿ Mar 10, 2017 20:20

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

So is the new expansion like BF4 where you can only play They Shall Not Pass maps on specifically They Shall Not Pass servers? I hated the fracturing that caused in BF4.

# ¿ Mar 14, 2017 20:36

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

Man, everyone was worried Fort de Vaux was going to be Locker 2.0 and it turns out that Locker 2.0 is actually Verdun Heights.

Infantry only, linear structure, tiny space, no flanking routes, and almost no cover anywhere. Maybe it's better if I don't use the Sweeper all game but I wasn't all that impressed.

EDIT: I haven't played Ops on the new maps yet but my friends are saying it feels like the maps were more designed for Ops than Conquest. Do people here agree with that?

TheOneAndOnlyT fucked around with this message at 00:45 on Mar 16, 2017

# ¿ Mar 16, 2017 00:40

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

http://i.imgur.com/6e1945O.gifv

# ¿ Mar 16, 2017 08:32

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

I don't think the arty truck has actually changed aside from the fact that emergency repair only heals 10 HP now (though it also clears all disables). Which is probably for the best because an instant 30 HP was some dumbass poo poo.

# ¿ Mar 18, 2017 21:39

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

lambskin posted:

The whole vehicle quick repair thing really pissed some people off. I don't get it personally, tanks are more vulnerable than they ever have been. I mean if a single assault gets in close range with you and they know what they are doing they can kill you fairly easily. And dear lord are you hosed if multiple assaults start spamming AT rockets at you. Hell, every class has access to light antitank grenades, which take a decent chunk of health off.

This couldn't be further from the truth, tanks are the least vulnerable that they've ever been in recent Battlefields. In BF4 a support or recon could take down a tank with C4 before the driver even knew they were taking damage, and engineers didn't even have to aim their launchers because they all had lock-on. To take down a tank alone in BF1, you have to be an Assault (because no other class has decent AT), you have to have backup (because it takes 5-6 hits and the driver has tons of time to react and kill you), and you have to have 100% accuracy (because if you miss once you don't have enough ammo to take down the tank alone, and he can just drive away and come back with 100% health). And that's before the driver even touches the emergency repair.

Tanks are supposed to be vulnerable if you push too hard. Armor doesn't make you some invincible battering ram--if you're playing like an idiot (and letting an Assault get that close is pretty idiotic) then you should get hosed up.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2017 19:10

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

BF4 tanks had all sorts of tools to prevent people sneaking up on them, and yet tanks got C4ed all the drat time. BF1 tanks have none of those tools, but nobody ever takes down a tank alone.

It's not a question of tools, it's a question of resilience. Tanks were not more "durable" in BF4. They got mobility killed if something sneezed on them and took more damage from launchers. Tanks in BF1 straight-up take more hits to kill, and assaults in BF1 have far less AT ammo to hit with. And again, that's before you even touch emergency repair. I'm fairly certain that there is literally no combination of assault gadgets that will do 130 damage to a heavy tank before running out of ammo.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2017 20:13

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

FastestGunAlive posted:

You're considering pubbie capability tho, I'm talking about my experiences as a sperg lord. I can say that I was much more durable as a tank in bf4 than I am in 1. I don't even bother with the heavy armor in 1 so I hadn't considered it. I guess we are looking at it from different perspectives but I see what you are saying

That's fair, I will agree that if you're actually in danger from a competent squad, it's much harder to get away in BF1 tanks. Honestly though I think light tanks and arty trucks are balanced pretty well, it's mostly heavy tanks and landships that I have a problem with. Yeah you can go support and limpet them, but if the driver is paying any attention at all he'll find you before the second one resupplies. Or he'll just drive away.

# ¿ Mar 19, 2017 22:24

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 05:32

TheOneAndOnlyT: Dec 18, 2005; Well well, mister fancy-pants, I hope you're wearing your matching sweater today, or you'll be cut down like the ugly tree you are.

I'm the invisible man
I'm the invisible man
Incredible how you can
See right through me

http://i.imgur.com/2cCfkwa.mp4

# ¿ Mar 21, 2017 23:52

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Video Games > Battlefield 5: My wife and I walked down the aisle to the Terminator theme

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