Jack Trades posted:

Although to be frank, I have no idea what I would've done if I was in the guy's shoes.

Phyzzle posted:

They just ordered a cake for 2018?

bone app the teeth posted:

1) Shut the gently caress up - You're too new and dumb still. Anything you say will mostly likely be responding to her words, not her feelz. And will backfire. Stay quiet and just don't make it worse.
2) Give her a hug - Stay quiet! Hugging is giving good feelz. Bear hug that woman when she needs it. It gives her both natural good feelz and the sensation of safety that is inbred in most animals.
3) AM and other sarcastic responses - My life got way better when I started replying to 80% of what my SO said with well-planned sarcasm. She doesn't give a poo poo about your logic (most of the time). Respond by controlling her feelings to what you want!! Think about that. You're using sass instead of debate to switch her feelings/thoughts around. It's more effective and everyone is happier. This is the way to put the brakes on when she's on the highway to negative feelz and swing down the offramp of your choice.
4) rear end smack, random dance, new music... - Anything that jolts her out of the spiral she's in. She doesn't need a solution. She doesn't want to discuss it. She wants to feel something different. This is you holding frame and communicating, "I'm not going to be pulled into your emotional poo poo. I wont allow you to control me." And.. if you're doing it right she'll be thinking, "Thank you for stopping my spiral. I appreciate a man that can cut through the poo poo and get us back on track."

This is why the rear end-hole got the girl. While you were determined to care about and fix her negative feelings (drawing into her frame) ... he was busy not giving a poo poo, being happy, and sucking them into his awesome feelings.
All of this has been said before. Shut the gently caress up. Hold frame. Bat poo poo tests. But hopefully this helps some of you digest the importance in a new way.

mind the walrus posted:

Are there any stories of people in a gaming group working out? Both in real life and online every gaming group I've seen falls apart to teenage bullshit.

Serephina posted:

There's a difference between 'guilty pleasure of a hobby' and 'all-consuming non-lifestyle'. Those guys are utter losers and watching ppl defend them is delicious. He's bitter because he's watching a person he cares about regress into worse-than-bad habits and health.

Worldshatter posted:

I fell into that same trap too. When you're like 14-15 and a bunch of tests from the magic science men tell you you're in some top percentile of the population it's easy to start believing in your own superiority. And the only real cure for it is for everyone around you to drop your ego-inflated rear end like the dead weight it is. It absolutely sucks at the time because of course you're just oh so smart and all the normal apes around you will never understand but you come out a better person at the other end.

Nuebot posted:

Will farts cheer you up? Because farts are destroying several relationships.

mind the walrus posted:

That is one of the most suburban stories I have ever read. At that point I would embrace the pariah status, wait til someone really crosses the legal line, take them and the town for all its worth and move the gently caress out.

Nuebot posted:

Not just "much younger" but she's literally half his age.

HardDiskD posted:

Because she discovered her affair late (as in, almost "ready to pop") in the pregnancy. I think if she had discovered it earlier she would have no problems with it.

loquacius posted:

dealbreaker imo

Leon Einstein posted:

There's no way that mom isn't fat.

Tolkien minority posted:

My wife [27F] acts more like my mother than my wife. I [27M] am considering divorce, but I don't know if this is fixable or a deal breaker


reddit verdict: op is a stubborn prick for wanting to do crazy things like, drink a beer, eat steak, spend time alone, ride a motorcycle.

Gaunab posted:

Charles Get-Out posted:

Having a male roommate isn't the issue to me, it's the fact that she's being shady about it and preemptively blocked any input the dude might have had. Denial of agency like this or like the dude trashing that other girl's vote is a pretty big red flag to me

Chomp8645 posted:

Yeah, if it's an actual debt payment. Like if there is an official debt owed and it's like "I have no cash, I will pay with this sex" or "you owe me, I will take my payment in sex" then that is very weird and also bad.

But a person thinking "wow what a nice thing this person did for me. I like this person. I will initiate the sex on account of these good feelings" then I think that's ok.

loquacius posted:

Sorry I used a psych term cavalierly I guess

Content: I (25F) asked my husband (27M) for a divorce in March, he originally agreed. Now he refuses and is giving me an impossible ultimatum. I'm also a horrible person and started seeing someone (29M) a month ago.

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

This is probably the most specific fetish of all time. Where does it end? Like, is that cashier at Whole Foods getting a little tingle when I use my card before the transaction finishes?

"23F non/smoker looking for strong, dominant card slider"

Facebook Aunt posted:

You're going to have hard times that are at least partly your own fault too, and you want your family to be there for you then.

Fullhouse posted:

"My wife has been having trouble getting pregnant, and I kissed a girl at Burning Man, so I proposed opening our relationship and she was impregnated by another dude and we got divorced. Also, I'm the most pretentious loving person on the planet. The end"

Chomp8645 posted:

Complex, hard to follow narrative: Lord of the Rings.

Dirtbag Diva posted:

And ugh at the blowjob baby. says he's out of shape and the fact sex winds him makes him insecure so he projects it onto her for not indulging him.

Pvt.Scott posted:

If anything, you'd need a cleanse for the toxic alcohol you just consumed in your cleanse cocktail. Hmm, not a bad way to sell more cocktails.

WampaLord posted:

Me [29F] with my husband[32M] of 3 years. He wanted an open relationship but isn't handling it well.

Seven Hundred Bee posted:

what's the proper way to offer someone a baby?

china bot posted:

tell the woman you are dating & who is presumably attracted to you that she gives you a boner and you'd like to give it back to her

quote:

First, I want to say that I logged out of this account that evening, and didn't come back until now, and I was BLOWN AWAY by all of the people offering food, gift certificates, or just good will, and I started crying.. again. I will respond to each of you individually.

So, to recap: My STBX is a cheating rear end, and he panicked and tried to erase his family.

The update: This all happened on a Sunday, so there wasn't a lot I could do right then. I put the kids to bed, and called my mom and cried. Then, I called my mother in law, who was horrified.

My inlaws came over that night with $200 in cash and a check for much more. My father in law is didn't say much, but he did fix my bathroom door (which is how he shows affection), and muttered that he would "fix this".

I opened a new checking account at a new bank (THANKS FOR THIS ADVICE) with the check my in laws gave me.

I opened a new credit card in my name.

My mother deployed a niece to help with childcare for the next week, I called in a lot of childminding favors, and with the cash my inlaws gave me, I was able to pay the babysitter while I worked this out.

I met with two divorce attorneys- both of them told me about what you had said, that he was legally screwed. I chose one, and we set the process in motion to get an emergency hearing, but by Tuesday, my old checking account had most of the money back, and my husband was asking to "talk".

On the advice of my lawyer, I took half of the checking account money and put it in my new bank, and kept records of everything.

I pulled our credit reports- He has over $40,000 in credit card debt. I also found out, that he received a raise last year, and funneled this money out of our shared accounts. I would have figured this out when I did our taxes, and this led to him panicking and trying to "erase" us.

Keep in mind, this rear end in a top hat gave me gonorrhea. I am an accountant by trade, and I'm afraid of CC debt the way some girls are afraid of spiders, so I was horrified about this, but my lawyer thinks it's likely that he'll have to have this debt on his own, as my name isn't on it, and it seems that most of it was spent on his side piece.

We have started mediation, which he agreed to when he realized that he would need to pay for BOTH of our divorce attnys.

My goal- which my lawyer thinks is reasonable, is to ask for alimony until I either re-marry (not likely) or my 2 year old is in school full time, and to have a reasonable amount of child support until she's 18, and then we'll split college costs for all of them. When all the kids are in school, I can concentrate on getting back to work.

I also plan to sell the house and buy a smaller house in a less elite section of town. The kids can share rooms, and I can live mortgage free.

So, I'm heartbroken, and diseased, but there's also an incredible weight that his lifted from me. Our marriage has been bad for so long, and I didn't even realize how unhappy I was, and how.. absent by husband was. It took my 5 year old almost a week to realize that Daddy was gone.

WrenP-Complete posted:

Pick posted:

I am SURE there were no pre-existing patterns in their relationship that might have caused this to be some sort of ... how shall we say, point of tipping?

LethalGeek posted:

Purse guy is getting eviscerated on reddit btw. Only one idiot was all "pff what a drama queen" and ..I'm going to look at their history hold on.

The Donald, some pizza gate thing, and a bitcoin knock off. Yeah sounds like a real winner

quote:

In spite of everything I still love her. Aside from her crazy emotional side, she's caring, beautiful, sexy, smart, funny, a great cook, gives me massages, takes time to make me gifts. Our relationship was pretty much perfect. I can't believe she's going to throw it all away over something so stupid and petty. How do I get her to see that she's being completely irrational?

Moridin920 posted:

Same

5'9", 180 lbs, 32 pant size, XL shirt

I could stand to lose 10 lbs or so def

54 40 or gently caress posted:

What is this nonsense about asking to buy something?

And whatever, she gets clothes he gets blown. Win win

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Okay, please no one cheat and look on reddit, guess what the interests are(there are a bunch):
I [17M] simply refuse to date until I can find a lady who shares common interests with me. Is this unreasonable?