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Sounds like that HOA is begging for a killdozering.
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May 1, 2017 04:00
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I feel like I lost 5 IQ points reading that and I don't have that many to spare.
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May 1, 2017 10:41
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:you better not loving forget the teddybears Even the TV can't bear to look.
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May 2, 2017 10:19
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WampaLord posted:This is a fun one! https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zf6vGLpAueQ
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May 2, 2017 10:34
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I once dated somebody and I noticed she hadn't showered in two or three days and I asked if she was going to take a shower before we went out, and she snapped, "If you expect me to shower every two days, we're going to have a problem." We had lots of problems.
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May 10, 2017 03:46
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ArbitraryC posted:My (28F) friend (26F) pretends she is Japanese, is alienating everyone around her She's just being tsundere. Please don't erase her anime heritage.
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May 29, 2017 10:51
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Haha yeah he definitely sounds like he'll do all of that.
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May 29, 2017 12:35
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Everything is going fine except for his complete contempt for me, which definitely doesn't show up anywhere else in our relationship.
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May 29, 2017 12:49
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therobit posted:I don't see where she is saying he had an asthma attack and had to go to the hospital, so I am thinking that this allergy is being exaggerated because he is a big baby. Absolutely this, but gently caress smokers.
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May 30, 2017 17:11
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That wife knew what was up, and that's probably the most blatant example of "See honey, I wrote Reddit and said I didn't want to gently caress her" I've seen yet.
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May 31, 2017 17:01
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Oh this? It's a... cat allergy, that's all.
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Jun 1, 2017 20:32
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Stay with him because good loving luck finding anyone else able to tolerate being around you for more than 5 minutes without their eyeballs bleeding off.
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Jun 4, 2017 19:59
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:I [21F] didn't wear the dress my boyfriend [25M] picked out for me to a friend's wedding...and he's mad. They started dating when he was 21 and she was 16. Also he doesn't like her dress because it's "too revealing."
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Jun 20, 2017 17:31
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Pick posted:As I sit here thinking of my actions, I need to write this apology. I am incredibly embarrassed and shamed of the past 6 years of lies and cheating, more importantly the embarrassment, and unequivocal hurt and sadness it has brought to you and our kids. It is so hard to think of the tremendous damage I have caused to break apart every good thing you were trying to build for our family and our future. Hell, same
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Jun 27, 2017 20:05
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dudeness posted:The clitoris is randomly generated at the start of each encounter. LOL
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Jul 2, 2017 19:02
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Please don't gently caress your parents or your pets.
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Jul 9, 2017 00:00
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Haifisch posted:My boyfriend [30M] admitted to "tracking" me [27F] on business trips. I feel violated and he thinks he did nothing wrong because it was out of concern. Look at this dumbass who doesn't just track his partner's every move through Google location sharing. smdh
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Jul 17, 2017 06:59
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Intruder posted:You'd think your abusive boyfriend committing statutory rape (I think?) would be a convenient excuse to get out of that hellhole of a relationship He may be a pedophile, but he's my pedophile, dammit!
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Jul 18, 2017 21:11
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Milotic posted:I'm sorry to hear about your losses. Dad wants to gently caress his daughter.
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Jul 20, 2017 08:44
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WampaLord posted:My [22M] friend [21F] of 9 months is dying and wants me to take her virginity. I have a girlfriend [22F] of 7 months. What do I do? Tell your GF it's for make a wish and gosh what else can you do? 
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Aug 20, 2017 07:21
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He should at least let her put it in their photo album, I mean come on.
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Aug 22, 2017 05:03
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Suburban US drivers actively try to murder bicyclists. I'm not joking or exaggerating.
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Sep 4, 2017 05:57
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You'd have to be so astoundingly clueless to go to one of the strip-mall curtained-storefront Asian massage parlors and not understand you're paying for a tug (at the bare minimum) from a sex slave.
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Sep 18, 2017 16:02
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I just got my haircut at a strip mall that has, from left to right, a sports bar, a church, a handjob parlor, a salon, a dentist.
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Sep 18, 2017 18:58
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They all look basically the same but the biggest tip-off is when you search for reviews before letting a stranger mess with your back and the top results are Backpage and rubmappers or whatever it's called.
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Sep 18, 2017 19:03
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He should just get a furry costume and refuse to take it off, ever.
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Sep 21, 2017 14:20
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I'm the minivan loaded down with piss bottles and cum shirts on a weekend trip to the dump. E: It's the cum shirts that did him in. Once you start hording your cum shirts, and the wife leaves town for a weekend, you're going to be faced with a choice -- take the cum shirts to the dump or masturbate into a shirt. The second will always win out. Modus Pwnens fucked around with this message at 16:26 on Oct 27, 2017 |
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Oct 27, 2017 16:21
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tactlessbastard posted:Give her some space. Get some dress shirts. lol Doc Hawkins posted:"There's just no way to win with you people" I sigh as I poo poo in my yard wearing nothing but a spiked collar. God drat I love this thread. E: Just pretend I emptyquoted this entire page.
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Oct 27, 2017 17:36
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I cheated and found the thread, and the poster did get an STD, lol. No wonder the ex is paranoid.
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Nov 13, 2017 20:59
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maskenfreiheit posted:wrong, hit him back Wrong, kill him before he kills someone drunk driving.
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Nov 19, 2017 05:07
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Inescapable Duck posted:If you're worried about germs, then four years old is about where children become plaguebearers shuttling all manner of stock childhood diseases back and forth from kindegarten, daycare, playgroup and relatives to home. They become plaguebearers as soon as they are around other children all day, whatever that age may be. He should do the babysitting at the sister's house because he was not going to get any work done anyway. He should also not divorce his wife because nobody should be subjected to dating her.
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Nov 25, 2017 09:05
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La Brea Carpet posted:foot-where 
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Nov 26, 2017 01:26
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La Brea Carpet posted:click this link and replace daughter with girlfriend and see if you still think it's normal. ＦＡＴＤＡＤ
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Dec 4, 2017 03:37
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Doggles posted:
😹
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Dec 4, 2017 20:34
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I'm not insecure, am I? Am I??
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Dec 21, 2017 00:38
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flick my Mr. Bean posted:Where do I sign up for the something awful prayer email chain. Well there's the steam gifts thread where goons pass along rebundled anime games.
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Jan 2, 2018 23:24
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dudeness posted:
It definitely includes the boss accidentally getting married to the bride without realizing it.
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Jan 11, 2018 05:05
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I'm super uncomfortable with shaming people for not wanting to have sex with certain people. Like if someone says they don't want to date someone who's bi, that's their right. Saying that no one straight should ever date someone bi is where you cross the line. But bodily autonomy comes first for me. Is that weird? 100% not being facetious here or trying to fish a certain response or anything like that.
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Jan 14, 2018 21:32
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Thanks for the replies. Those make a lot of sense.
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Jan 14, 2018 22:13
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| # ¿ May 22, 2024 10:51 |
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Andy Dufresne posted:The worst part about poo poo sniffer is you're not gonna want to leave him alone with the child ever again until well after they're potty trained. If he's got some sexual fetish involving your child you never loving leave him alone with the kid ever again.
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Jan 15, 2018 19:52
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