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Gimmick account
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Nov 2, 2017 02:19
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| # ¿ May 13, 2024 11:44 |
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I had a very smart, very bitter major who was sort of a supervisor for about a year while deployed. He had a propensity for long, unhinged rants about the workings of the army. He was also a balding, lumpy, ranger-tabbed infantry O-4 whose brigade refused to give him a real job after he finished doing infantry BN S3 AND XO time. Lastly, he had a wife in the brigade who was also a field grade officer. His favorite rant, delivered whilst dainty snowflakes fell around our outpost in Wardak, precluding combat operations and ripening the air with the boredom of soldiers -- something this major could smell from miles away -- was about how the army hates dual-military spouses, and, by that logic, single people on active duty as well. They can't control you if you don't have a dependent, so they will gently caress you until you quit or have a dependent. When this major's wife got pregnant the army offered to let her quit the army. In fact they extend that offer to every female officer who has a kid. Want out? Here's your free pass. Sit at home all day, then go to Target and drown your loneliness in a plastic flood of baby poo poo you don't really need. Bug your husband. Break him. Make him weigh every work decision in terms of whether you'll be mad or just give a little sigh and say, "Okay honey." Make him beg his commander for holiday leave time, because then he'll be working til 9pm for months beforehand to "earn" it. Better yet, make him so miserable that he'd rather be at work til 9pm than go home and deal with your metastasizing, 100-calorie snack-pack devouring, Facebook Military Mom Group posting rear end. The army wants this because a soldier with dependents who has been broken and can't afford to go to school, or take an income hit after separation, will give the army a full 20 years without protest or expectation of incentive. The army likes that.
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Nov 2, 2017 17:14
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You know when you're on a run, ruck, or hike and you start feeding off the misery of the guys who are sucking the most? Some folks just can't turn it off.
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Nov 2, 2017 22:57
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Your Battle Buddy posted:Y'all should be ashamed of yourselves. That’s not very battle buddy of you.
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Nov 4, 2017 15:21
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Vengarr posted:Too long for a thread title? Unfortunately.
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Nov 6, 2017 04:05
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LtCol J. Krusinski posted:Goddamn it. Sorry boo I should start checking them again
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Nov 7, 2017 03:11
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My hot take: mustang’s spirit finally broke the other week when his leave got denied and the Kool-Aid Ghost found a new victim to possess.
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Nov 15, 2017 23:59
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WAR CRIME SYNDICAT posted:Yeah that's what active duty air force uses. Any AF computer has access. You just sign out before you leave for the day that day, and sign back in when you get back. If you don't, they just send you email alerts until you do. The Air Force can’t exist without the army to absorb all the retards.
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Nov 17, 2017 09:13
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Vahakyla posted:Got to hang out, in the Alps, with the Italian Alpinis, their mountain infantry. These dudes loving own. The guy to my left kept making fun of us and asking why do americans take the Army so seriously. I don't understand, why is the army allowing you, a PFC, to have fun? Is someone screaming at you from off-camera?
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Nov 18, 2017 15:29
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boop the snoot posted:You have to be a miserable major in order to become a lovely bat commander! Mustang posted:Just so I can become a miserable major? No thanks So I was talking to my old S3 from my captain days recently. I needed an LOR for something and we were catching up over facebook messenger. former army major -> LTC posted:Zeris, what up. Have watched Facebook photos of you I various stages of "Born on the Fourth of July". What is the latest, where you at and what are you doing. After 4 years of trying for battalion command and ROTC I finally got the hint the army doesn't need me and dropped my retirement packet last week. Liberating but scary. 
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Nov 19, 2017 03:59
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I don't see what's confusing about it but I respect that it sounds weird. I guess that was my point. Don't be the guy waiting for a chance at battalion command who takes too long to get the hint. Just remember. No matter how much you love the army, it will never love you back as much.
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Nov 19, 2017 04:38
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Mustang posted:The first time I felt old was when I realized one of my new privates was in elementary school while I was a sophomore in college  I'm done. I tried. The new LTs can do this. gently caress it, I'm out. Ooooh, new MILPER about Captain's board came out?
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Dec 2, 2017 05:40
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I LICK APE PUSSY posted:My ROTC peers are all making Major this month Same, and I look back to how majors appeared to me when I was a boot, and I am so glad I haven't become that.
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Dec 2, 2017 14:35
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Loden Taylor posted:The tragedy of the military is that you can't just wash your hands of your subordinates. In almost any other job, you could just fire your worst employees and then promptly forget all about them, but not here. It's actually hard to fire employees unless they do something incredibly stupid or negligent. Otherwise you have to manage them out or suffer through months of performance improvement plans designed to make them fail. If you don't, you're going to get sued for something.
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Dec 2, 2017 14:37
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Mustang posted:3 day weekend for JBLM but I have to work on Monday because our range walk for gunnery was scheduled before the JBLM donsa was pushed out. Quit being a little bitch and grow some heart hooah
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Dec 9, 2017 23:55
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spacetoaster posted:Posted this in a thread about idiots believing bullshit they shouldn't have believed. Figure you'd guys would want to hear it: What
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Dec 27, 2017 18:14
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spacetoaster posted:My bad. It was a jilted lover who came back to the states and murdered the object of his obsession. Then committed suicide. But also she was a veteran and probably was crazy regardless of her time with him? And didn't you say he died too?
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Dec 27, 2017 23:22
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I love these whiny blogger accounts that wax all day about leadership and history, when you find out they’re a loving lieutenant: https://twitter.com/pptsapper/status/946435801574977536
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Dec 28, 2017 21:18
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Ashmole posted:Some of his stuff is amusing but I was really surprised to read that. And a guard lieutenant at that. Hahaha this retard posts on that forum
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Dec 29, 2017 07:29
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Another argument for combining the army thread and the idiot thread.
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Jan 6, 2018 17:57
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Weak rear end poo poo posting fake garbage
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Jan 7, 2018 01:11
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UP THE BUM NO BABY posted:There are cycles other than red?
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Jan 18, 2018 14:12
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Vahakyla posted:Pretty cool to be 27 and need your wife to put socks on. Priapism is no joke!
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Jan 19, 2018 18:08
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Metal Geir Skogul posted:I always joked about weed and was on 100% of the UAs after switching to the NG. After four years, while doing the monthly duty of sitting in my PTs in one of the classrooms at the armory chugging water so I could piss in a cup (I've always been pee shy, though for some reason only indoors -- on FTXs I could assist the unit in their snow pisswriting no problem) I made a comment along the lines of "Yo, is the reason I'm always here for these "random" UAs because I make all of the weed jokes? I'm literally the only white guy that has to come to all of these." and our dentist, a major, jabbed me in the shin and leaned in with a serious look on his face and went "actually, yes it is. Shhhh." That's really interesting about your pee shyness. Does it matter how many people are watching?
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Jan 23, 2018 04:31
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bird food bathtub posted:Pee shyness wasn't my issue. My problem was that apparently I am the only human being in existence that wakes up and immediately takes a piss before running. So when Top got the brilliant idea to surprise everyone at morning PT formation I'm on a completely empty bladder and guess what mother fucker, chugging canteen after canteen until I vomit water isn't going to fix that in ten minutes. Will you pee for me
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Jan 23, 2018 05:27
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Is it legal?
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Jan 29, 2018 00:51
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Have you tried asking nicely
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Mar 2, 2018 23:48
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Mustang posted:Pretty sure I'd still have to go the career course for that, letting the Army sink it's claws even deeper into me. Bullshit.
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Mar 4, 2018 13:47
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Every NCO I knew at my ROTC department was loving female cadets or trying to, including an E-8 who had a history of closed-door one-on-one foot inspections with the freshmen ladies after a ruck march.
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Mar 6, 2018 14:55
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| # ¿ May 13, 2024 11:44 |
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Mustang posted:one of my pet peeves is dipping, especially officers that do it sitting at their desks spitting into a mountain dew bottle or a monster can all day. So professional being so addicted to tobacco that you have to do it all day everyday everywhere you go, because dipping indoors is totally a thing normal people do. poo poo, I never even see normal people dip but everywhere you look on post there's somebody with dip in their lip. I understand your job sucks and you don’t like it but have you considered that there might be additional sources factoring in to your misery?
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Mar 8, 2018 04:41
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