Jose posted:

https://twitter.com/DPRK_News/status/836841236929654784

mfcrocker posted:

Anyone but Stephen loving Williams.

hakimashou posted:

What's wrong with red trousers?

TinTower posted:

https://twitter.com/ryxnf/status/837076434761867269

brb cutting up my membership card

quote:

Labour has lost nearly 26,000 members since last summer, according to leaked data.

The apparent shedding of card-carrying supporters has led one former chairman of the parliamentary Labour party (PLP) to warn the “tide is turning”.

More than three-quarters of those to leave the party last year had joined after the 2015 general election, a period that saw membership grow rapidly under Jeremy Corbyn’s leadership.

Figures reported by the Times showed the number of resignations in 2016 was more than the previous six years combined, while more than 15,465 have left since mid-December.

Up to 7,000 members are said to have resigned last month following Corbyn’s three-line whip on MPs commanding them to support the triggering of Article 50.

JFairfax posted:

LemonDrizzle posted:

https://twitter.com/youngvulgarian/status/839450026254413824

Oberleutnant posted:

Oberleutnant posted:

quote:

You awake in an ANCIENT FOREST CLEARING. You can see FIVE EXITS: to the NORTH, SOUTH, EAST, a HATCH IN THE BOTTOM OF THE FOREST FLOOR, SOMEHOW, and WEST. In the middle of the clearing stands JEREMY CORBYN. He looks like a substitute geography teacher resigned to the fact that he lost the attention of this Year 9 class.

What do you do?

namesake posted:

Go SOMEHOW

OwlFancier posted:

GET YE FLASK

quote:

GO NORTH
You go north, to a future where Corbyn maintains his grip on the Labour leadership. This can’t be that bad, can it? Swatting away coup after coup after coup, Owen Smith popping up every four to six months, adding inch after inch on to the end of his fantastical long penis, trying and failing to take a pop at the king, shrinking away to nothing again, boom and bust and repeat.

In this future, Corbyn stays, building on the Copeland disaster to more, even more surprising disasters, all the while being A Very Good Man with Some Very Good Policies that frequently get ignored because he sits too politely through weak bodyings by the Tories every single Wednesday at PMQs. Listen, it’s an unlikely path – I’ve always thought a Labour leader should step down when they get the dreaded Stephen Hawking vote of no confidence – but no, you chose NORTH, so we’re going to stick with Corbyn and drive eyes closed into the next general election.

quote:

GO SOUTH
You go south, into the reality where Corbyn goes. Thing is, it’s fair to say Corbyn’s ascent to leadership in the first place was due at least in some part to an across-the-board personality vacuum in the entire Labour party, so without Corbyn there is a leadership election between a handful of anodyne, brown-haired, suit-wearing men – Owen Smith goes on Sunday Brunch in an attempt to win the popular vote and does something disastrous with an egg; Andy Burnham gets turned away from his own hustings event at a local school because nobody can quite verify who he is; while the party flirts with its usual let’s-pretend-we-might-elect-a-woman-for-a-bit-but-then-not-actually-do-that trick, which basically just descends into Jess Phillips telling Diane Abbott to gently caress off again. This process lasts eight months.

quote:

GO EAST
You go east and emerge in an olde tyme detective’s office, where, atop a leather-inlay writing desk, among a huge slippery pile of paper and files, you uncover a massive, massive anti-Corbyn MSM (mainstream media) conspiracy. You find a note saying “UNDERMINE CORBYN AT ALL COSTS” written in Rupert Murdoch’s handwriting; you find a Telegraph internal document about how to disrupt MSM conspiracy theorists by writing about the MSM conspiracy theory a lot; Tom Watson sits in a jar on the table, burbling slightly-open-to-interpretation epithets into the grey nothing. You knew it.

quote:

GO WEST
You go west, on to the most ominous path, where dark, gloomy stormclouds cluster around the tips of distant mountains, and the air crackles with electricity, and the trees shake in the wind, and Tony Blair is back, again, saying bad things about the Labour party and how it’s to blame for Brexit. “The debilitation of the Labour party is the facilitator of Brexit,” he says, Blairily, between New York Times op-eds and starting wars. Can any life survive beneath the looming Blair shadow? No. Aztecs beat you with clubs and drown you in the rapid water. Dinosaurs suck your bones dry of their marrow.

quote:

Arron Banks cuts links with Ukip

Arron Banks, the erstwhile Ukip donor, Nigel Farage ally and Leave.EU founder, has finally cut his links with Ukip.

He has been critical of the party for some time now, and has suggested he may stand against Ukip’s only MP Douglas Carswell at the next election, but now he has finally given up on the party after a row about his membership being suspended.

He has just issued this statement.

"Ukip has somehow managed to allow my membership to lapse this year despite having given [sic] considerably more than the annual membership fee over the past 12 months.

On reapplying I was told my membership was suspended pending my appearance at a NEC meeting.

Apparently, my comments about the party being run like a squash club committee and Mr Carswell have not gone down well.

I now realise I was being unfair to squash clubs all over the UK and I apologise to them.

We will now be concentrating on our new movement."

By “new movement”, Banks means the grassroots, populist movement that he plans to build up, based on the success Leave.EU had mobilising leave supporters using social media.

quote:

The number of EU nationals registering as nurses in England has dropped by 92% since the Brexit referendum in June, and a record number are quitting the NHS, it can be revealed.

The shock figures have prompted warnings that Theresa May’s failure to offer assurances to foreigners living in the UK is exacerbating a staffing crisis in the health service.

Only 96 nurses joined the NHS from other European nations in December 2016 – a drop from 1,304 in July, the month after the referendum.

At the same time, freedom of information responses from 80 of the 136 NHS acute trusts in England show that 2,700 EU nurses left the health service in 2016, compared to 1,600 EU nurses in 2014 – a 68% increase.

quote:

The NHS is already under pressure because of a long-term failure to hire enough people. Applications for nursing courses plummeted by almost a quarter in a year after the government axed bursaries for trainees in 2016. Numbers fell by 9,990 to 33,810 in 12 months, according to figures released in February by the university admissions service Ucas.

Meanwhile, one in three nurses is due to retire in the next 10 years and there are 24,000 nurse jobs unfilled, RCN figures show.

quote:

Police: No terrorists have got into the building. Two have been caught
on Westminster bridge, one officer down.
We have been evacuated from Portcullis to Norman Shaw North. We have
hardly any phone signal. It is complete chaos- MPs have been told to
go back to their rooms. We are being told conflicting information
about where to go. Currently penned in a corridor with hundreds of
people.

Kassad posted:

I just saw this tweet:

https://twitter.com/emmaclarkuk/status/844578406473912320

It might be true, then. Jesus.

Fans posted:

Hey all, I don't do the mod voice thing often but if you could please refrain from musing over which MP's you'd prefer to die that'd be real nice.

Breath Ray posted:

No you just need one. Private as opposed to state pension.

Nenonen posted:

how gross is your salary?