Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

«‹›4 »

FactsAreUseless

ShinyBirdTeeth posted:

The gently caress is a "penguin?"

Pan guan
Penghan
Penngwenn
Pengueen
Pendjinn

# ¿ Oct 21, 2018 01:22

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:48

FactsAreUseless

got any sevens posted:

halloween as orthodox satanist has potential

This is the plot of the new Sabrina show.

# ¿ Oct 30, 2018 04:58

FactsAreUseless

Saying the name "Phoebe" wrong in ways that lead to embarrassment, but since it's always written Phoebe the reader can't tell so it all has to be implied, and it escalates to levels of humorous absurdity.

# ¿ Nov 9, 2018 02:18

FactsAreUseless

Manifisto posted:

good idea, pls provide some gifs of phoebe

This is disgusting. Next one's a perma.

# ¿ Nov 9, 2018 02:26

FactsAreUseless

ShinyBirdTeeth posted:

kicked out of the grocery for calling the asparagus 'erotic.'

Kicked out of the funeral for responding to the eulogy with "oh my, how ribald!"

# ¿ Nov 12, 2018 03:11

FactsAreUseless

Kontradaz posted:

getting kicked out of a funeral because you yelled "encore, encore!" at the end

Being rude on purpose

# ¿ Nov 12, 2018 09:35

FactsAreUseless

got any sevens posted:

being invited to strangers funerals because you make them so fun

My IRL funeral idea, which I will never let go of, is to be shellacked so my body is encased in a hard, clear plastic, but they put a big grin on my face and they move my body around so it's a merry-go-round ride, and I just stare at the funeral-goers, smiling, going around and around and around and around until the SCA needs the building at the fairground on Thursday.

# ¿ Nov 13, 2018 08:14

FactsAreUseless

An erotic fanfic where Richard Nixon gets a bukkake titled Frost Nixon.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2018 01:08

FactsAreUseless

Robot Made of Meat posted:

Umm, excuse me but I believe you will find, if you check, that Frost/Nixon is actually slashfic. After all, the slash (solidus) is clearly evident in the title.

False, but Frost/Nixon is one of the tags of Frost Nixon.

# ¿ Nov 15, 2018 03:25

FactsAreUseless

Dungeon Ecology posted:

thanks for giving me the worst visual imagery of the day!

Richard Milhouse Nixon, jowls dripping with semen, saying to the camera "I am not a slut."

# ¿ Nov 15, 2018 23:04

FactsAreUseless

A 20th-century counterculture poetry version of 8 Mile

Knees weak, palms are sweaty
There's vomit on his sweater already
Ferlinghetti

# ¿ Nov 30, 2018 00:19

FactsAreUseless

HappyKitty posted:

[SCENE: a Christmas concert; a CHOIR is singing "Deck the Halls." STEVE is singing a solo part.]

STEVE: 'Tis the season to be jolly!

CHOIR: [Unison] Fa la la la la, etc.

STEVE: [Turns to his secret crush DON, kisses him]

STEVE: Don, we now are gay

[Exeunt]

I had a similar idea earlier today but it revolved around the phrase "Don, we are gay and in peril"

# ¿ Dec 1, 2018 08:07

FactsAreUseless

Miles "Tails" Gotti

# ¿ Jan 28, 2019 23:21

FactsAreUseless

Punch and Judy vs. Predator

# ¿ Jan 29, 2019 03:26

FactsAreUseless

A horror film called Porgie and the tagline is "Killed the girls and made them die."

# ¿ Jan 30, 2019 07:58

FactsAreUseless

Cubone posted:

I've been holding on to this screenshot for a while and I don't think I'm ever going to have a good reason to post it

it's good

# ¿ Feb 13, 2019 09:26

FactsAreUseless

ghost emoji posted:

a Marie Kondo superfan whose house is packed to the brim with Marie Kondo memorabilia, books, etc

Gollum clutching the ring to his chest, hissing "it brings me joy."

# ¿ Feb 13, 2019 20:22

FactsAreUseless

A simplified version of English spoken only by doves

# ¿ Feb 14, 2019 09:27

FactsAreUseless

People treat me like a criminal just because I have been careless with a delicate man.

# ¿ Feb 22, 2019 03:11

FactsAreUseless

FactsAreUseless fucked around with this message at 09:49 on Jun 28, 2021

# ¿ Feb 22, 2019 07:14

FactsAreUseless

Manifisto posted:

fau doesn't have time for explanations, what he needs is a good defense

# ¿ Feb 23, 2019 05:23

FactsAreUseless

Cubone posted:

and it's a sad, saaad world
when a girl will break a boy just because she caaaan 🎵

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FFOzayDpWoI

If you click this song and decide you like it, please know that it is only 1 percent as good as her fourth album, The Idler Wheel etc.

# ¿ Feb 23, 2019 05:29

FactsAreUseless

vanisher posted:

Full contact competitive chanting?

this is just normal sex

# ¿ Feb 25, 2019 02:38

FactsAreUseless

Calling Ben & Jerry's "Banangeries"

# ¿ Mar 31, 2019 03:47

FactsAreUseless

Packaged cheese labeled "Havarti, will travel."

# ¿ Mar 31, 2019 23:50

FactsAreUseless

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

ben and jerr-ays, for the classy surburban icecream eater

A vegan knockoff called Jen and Sherri's.

# ¿ Apr 1, 2019 20:26

FactsAreUseless

Nevvy Z posted:

All sports can be improved by the introduction of a little magic. Or a lot!

Got some of the basketball's hair and fingernails, we're bound to win now

# ¿ Apr 4, 2019 21:27

FactsAreUseless

A very homophobic cleaning product called Orson Scotch Guard

# ¿ Apr 22, 2019 09:27

FactsAreUseless

A pornographic magazine called "Nice Hat, Big Balls."

# ¿ May 4, 2019 21:33

FactsAreUseless

Wooooooaaaahhhhhh

Kevin let your light shine down

# ¿ May 14, 2019 01:29

FactsAreUseless

Can I tempt you into a chocolate, Ms...?

Cherry-Tomato. Covered Cherry-Tomato.

# ¿ May 18, 2019 20:45

FactsAreUseless

Renaming "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory" to Chucky Bucket, Candy Lad.

# ¿ May 26, 2019 22:47

FactsAreUseless

Wearing underwear that says "Intel Inside" and then jamming a quad-core processor up into your heat sink.

# ¿ Jul 16, 2019 10:01

FactsAreUseless

The Little Prince: Machiavelli for the Playground [Grade 4 Edition]

# ¿ Jul 26, 2019 02:45

FactsAreUseless

said the man with a grin
as he wiped off his chin
"News and weather, after the break."

This is Nantucket Public Radio

# ¿ Aug 1, 2019 06:34

FactsAreUseless

Dating site for chubby musical fans called The Heaviside Layer

# ¿ Aug 31, 2019 06:34

FactsAreUseless

deep-sea explorer Johnny Deeper

# ¿ Sep 11, 2019 06:58

FactsAreUseless

FactsAreUseless posted:

deep-sea explorer Johnny Deeper

"Johnny's dead. That's right, Ma. He was trying to go deeper. He was trying! He was trying!"

# ¿ Sep 11, 2019 07:03

FactsAreUseless

google THIS posted:

Instead of doing that little "come on" motion when starting a fight Neo turns his sign from STOP to SLOW.

Neo flipping backwards through the air in slow motion but instead of dodging bullets he's dodging busy commuters

# ¿ Sep 12, 2019 03:21

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 13, 2024 17:48

FactsAreUseless

google THIS posted:

The freeway scene, exactly the same except they're not being chased or shot at and there are a lot more orange barrels.

The Nebuchadnezzar slowly making a three-point turn as those tentacle sentinel things wave away other traffic

# ¿ Sep 12, 2019 03:45

The Something Awful Forums > Main > BYOB: BYOB BYOB BOYB BBOY YOBB YBOB BBYO?? > Jokes that are good but you can't be bothered to develop a thread for

«‹›4 »