Middle East Thread: Clarissa Explains the Fall

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Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

We haven't been hearing terribly much from the European migrant crisis this year, have we?

# ¿ Nov 7, 2017 02:12

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# ¿ May 13, 2024 13:38

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Personally I stopped giving a poo poo about the Syrian Civil War when several months into 2011, I realized that the FSA wasn't going to win this one, and that no US aid was forthcoming lest it step on Russia's toes.

# ¿ Nov 7, 2017 19:12

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

I do wish that there'd be a zoroastrian cultural revival in Iran one of these days...if not a fullblown revivalism.

# ¿ Nov 8, 2017 13:26

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

icantfindaname posted:

In 100% serious, not-joking honesty Iran would/will very likely be a much better steward of the Middle East than the USA and its allies ever were or will be

1. gently caress yes and if I ever were to get into foreign policy in my life I would do my utmost to make this happen.
2. Even if this makes the Arabs hate us more, well gently caress them anyways - because they're the ones dealing with desertification and potential uninhabitability not Iran! :v:

# ¿ Nov 8, 2017 19:19

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Al-Saqr posted:

1. Iran is not a benevolent force in the region, they are every bit as murderous and oppressive through their proxies as any other fascist movement.

2. try being a decent human being and not a total retard, be for democracy, freedom and human rights rather than arbitrarily picking one group of murderers and oppressors over another.

You think I'm still going to blindly follow such idealism after the poo poo we've been through and done? We too are murderous and oppresive in our own 'soft' ways. 'Human decency' has no political prowess in the ME and never has since we ousted Mossadegh. 12 years of following ME bullshit does this to you.

Grouchio fucked around with this message at 19:39 on Nov 8, 2017

# ¿ Nov 8, 2017 19:35

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Al-Saqr posted:

Like, I just watched the speech Hariri gave, the guy was always known to be an idiot with zero charisma, but it was as clear as loving day there was a figurative gun pointed to his head in the way he read the speech and it's contents.

For posterity, how do you tell whether that's the case or not, visually?

# ¿ Nov 10, 2017 09:35

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

What are Blair's war crimes anyway? I was a bit too young to remember him when he was PM.

# ¿ Nov 12, 2017 20:40

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Al-Saqr posted:

Hariri is now on TV saying that he's a free man in Riyadh and that he'll be returning to Lebanon in 2/3 days

https://twitter.com/bbcworld/status/929784451508391938

So what the gently caress was all this drama meant to accomplish exactly?!?!

MBS going hurr durr don't you mess with me Lebanon/Hezbollah I mean business bruh

# ¿ Nov 12, 2017 20:42

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Bip Roberts posted:

Did you forget when he decided to invade a country and kill hundreds of thousands of people without cause and the behalf of the british petroleum corporation

I only ever heard what bullshit Bush was doing.

# ¿ Nov 13, 2017 03:11

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

icantfindaname posted:

I agree the window is rapidly closing, but that's what makes the situation dangerous.

It's not very likely, but given the state of the world I have had a bad feeling that something like a quadruple whammy of a new Israeli invasion of Lebanon, Turkish invasion of Syrian Kurdistan, KSA doing more incomprehensible and ineffective flailing at its enemies, and US airstrikes on Iran all happening at the same time is much more likely than it should be

Feels like 2010 all over again, doesn't it?

# ¿ Nov 13, 2017 10:59

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Brother Friendship posted:

Wasn't this the case throughout all of the countries swallowed up by the Arab Spring? They were the most populous, educated and optimistic generation in memory and genuinely believed that they could reform their world.

I personally think that was the last chance the Arab World had at proper democratization before climate change wreaks real havoc on the area. And other than Tunisia they failed.

# ¿ Nov 18, 2017 00:39

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Can we, perhaps, not go to war with Iran?

# ¿ Nov 27, 2017 22:55

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Mans posted:

"my imperialism is more humane than yours"

Pax Brittanica in a nutshell.

# ¿ Nov 29, 2017 21:32

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

We're just going to let MBS have nukes now? I thought that Kim just taught us a lesson.

# ¿ Nov 30, 2017 04:56

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Why the hell did the British split Yemen in the first place?

# ¿ Dec 3, 2017 04:16

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Ibn Salman is making an anime:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MTpSafUJzhQ

Al-Saqr how does this make you feel?

# ¿ Jan 21, 2018 22:47

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Freezer posted:

For Bulgarians it is a God given right and duty to mess with Turkey whenever possible.

Turkey does want to invade and occupy Bulgaria in the event that the EU/NATO collapses, so this is completely justified.

# ¿ Jan 25, 2018 05:44

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Sergg posted:

How many days had Mahmoud been in this prison? Emaciated, covered in scars from car batteries and metal cables, he stood there, hanging in his cell, his arms affixed to the ceiling. Suddenly a clanking noise could be heard at his dark metal cell door as it unlocked. "Allah save me!" he screamed. First the torturer beat the bottoms of his feet with a metal truncheon, then looked at him and said "Don't worry, comrade. Allah isn't real, religion is a lie. The only true path is through glorious socialism!"

Mahmoud began crying tears of joy. "Thank you, oh blessed kismet! Praise Marx!" he shouted as the torturer began to peel his fingernails off with a pair of pliers. The great burden of false religious thought had been lifted off his upraised shoulders, which had permanent rotator cuff damage due to the constant shoulder dislocations. He decided that if he ever left this prison alive, he would explain to his fellow Syrians how wrong they were about Assad and the Baath Party. As rivulets of blood dripped from his hands onto his unwashed, greasy hair, he proclaimed "Truly this is the best of all possible worlds, for it is a secular country that I live in!"

# ¿ Jan 25, 2018 08:48

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Middle East Thread of Eternal Despair - Kurds are Uncucked

# ¿ Jan 25, 2018 13:39

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Thanks for the title change! :perfect:

# ¿ Jan 26, 2018 00:41

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

With regards to Egypt, they are slowly getting assassinated by the Ethiopian govt:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_8X8tbjqjg

# ¿ Feb 4, 2018 07:17

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Presenting: The most likely first hotspot for water wars - Egypt!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G_8X8tbjqjg

# ¿ Feb 24, 2018 07:31

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Volkerball posted:

https://twitter.com/AlinejadMasih/s...90%7Ctwterm%5E1

Little old ladies protesting is the best.

Reminds me of

# ¿ Feb 24, 2018 20:13

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Saladman posted:

E: Honestly spinning either thing as a positive outcome for killing tens of millions of people is retarded, and MBS shouldn't win any humanitarian awards even if Yemeni women do retain better rights in a few years. Although who knows, Obama got a Nobel Peace prize for doing absolutely jack-poo poo.

Obama got a Nobel prize literally because he wasn't George W Bush.

# ¿ Mar 1, 2018 08:08

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

What do you guys think Trump is planning to do tonight regarding Syria?

# ¿ Apr 9, 2018 19:27

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Should we expect war with Russia or just with Syria (and Iran)?

# ¿ Apr 11, 2018 01:48

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Where were all the cool heads from last night? And now you're all chicken littling over an invasion that may not even start a war with russia, much less a nuclear one?

# ¿ Apr 11, 2018 19:57

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

CrazyLoon posted:

This plus while having Pompeo and Haley, two people with open disdain for the UN and any possibility of working with other countries. Like...if the US wanted to alienate the rest of the world and shatter any and all reliable communication (super loving dangerous during any kind of crisis event, the likelihood of which will go up with Bolton around now), it's doubtful much could beat this combo.

Wouldn't that also allow for a period of isolation after 2020?

# ¿ Apr 11, 2018 20:27

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Sinteres posted:

Unless it's Bernie, the next Democratic nominee's probably going to be somewhere between Obama and Hillary on foreign policy. Even relative isolationists in the US are pretty hawkish, and the foreign policy establishment in both parties tries very hard to make sure anyone with dovish instincts gets dragged back to somewhere in the range of what's considered respectable opinion, which means pretty heavy engagement. It's worth remembering that even a lot of Democrats thought Obama was kind of a wimp on foreign policy, and he murked bin Laden, authorized drone strikes all over the place, and overthrew a dictator.

Hmm. Just wishful thinking that America could afford to allot its budget and time more towards cleaning up house, eh?

# ¿ Apr 11, 2018 20:35

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Vincent Van Goatse posted:

Carpet bomb them all.

# ¿ Apr 11, 2018 21:31

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

So poo poo will/will not go down this afternoon then?

# ¿ Apr 12, 2018 14:44

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Office Pig posted:

President Trump will meet with Defense Secretary Mattis, says decision on Syria strikes coming 'fairly soon'

... okay.

So a normal retaliatory response. I also bet :10bux:

that Russia was secretly warned ahead of time, again.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2018 18:45

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

I remember being invested in the Syrian knot for several months when it started, as just another extension of the Arab Spring, before I realized that the rebels had/have no chance of overthrowing Assad, and that the war would trudge on for as long as it has now taken. So I shrugged.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2018 21:03

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

pro starcraft loser posted:

Assad is going to win the war without massive outside intervention that would include fighting Russia and Iran. I just don't see the point in bombing a few airfields and killing a handful of Syrian army guys. Is this all just to save face because we said "hey don't do that"?

Pretty much. Most other options, including having the rebels win, were destroyed six years ago.

# ¿ Apr 12, 2018 23:25

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Sinteres posted:

This is the dumbest argument in the history of the thread, and I apologize to everyone for engaging with it.

# ¿ Apr 13, 2018 16:09

Grouchio: Aug 31, 2014

Cat Mattress posted:

lol, what a child
https://twitter.com/Wilkmaster/status/984534491720044545

What is it about Twitter that makes grown men behave like they're playground bullies in a kindergarten?

Not everyone has been through true hell and back, so they're not used to getting owned.

# ¿ Apr 13, 2018 17:41