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Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Mel Mudkiper posted:

once you hit rock bottom, there is nowhere to go but up

This is not bottom. We can be the first team to have 2 winless seasons after their 2 top 5 picks refuse to sign. I firmly believe this is not bottom yet.

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Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
The parade will be live streamed for those of us that will make it.


https://twitter.com/AllaireMatt/status/947576659791831041

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
If you're buying Perfect Season poo poo be aware people are the loving worst.

https://twitter.com/Reflog_18/status/947580608305401857

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Since this is celebration super station can we get this added to the OP?

The Parade doubles as a fund raiser for the Cleveland Food bank. All official parade merch sales benefit them. Be aware there are shitlords selling knockoff gear that wont benefit the food bank.
https://bemade.in/products/perfect-season-parade-2017

If you want news from the organizer himself follow @reflog_18 on twitter and his lieutenant @allairematt on twitter

Other relevent links
http://brownsparade.com/
https://m.facebook.com/events/119466442059368/

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
For anyone with hopes that John Dorsey will fix all this bullshit there's something you need to know.

Sashi Brown is gone yes but his cohorts Paul DePodesta, Andrew Berry and Hue Jackson operate outside his authority and answer only to Jimmy Haslam. "The Homeless Guy" outside the stadium that wanted Johnny Motherfucking Football drafted never stopped making the picks. It was always Jimmy and still is. This isn't bottom and it's only getting worse.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Yaws posted:

gently caress Eli Manning for this poo poo btw. What a coward.

Really, and player that refuses to sign on a bad team is a bitch.

Finally someone that understands me no matter how irrational the thought is.

The Twinkie Czar posted:

Potential Browns players need to look at this bitch and decide if they're cowards too.



I hate you.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

NEED MORE MILK posted:

draft picks aren’t going to refuse to sign because most draft picks dads aren’t Archie Manning and they’re certainly not independently wealthy

Josh Rosen is the son of a neurosurgeon and a lawyer. He's fine.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

GaussianCopula posted:


If Dorsey can turn around the roster he still has more than enough time to get rid of Hue Jackson. It’s not like they are extending his contract.

That's the thing Dorsey doesn't have the power to effect the needed change. He's just 1 of 4 people reporting to Haslam. Jimmy calls the shots and I'm convinced he never stopped making the picks. Everyone is just an advisor.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
How could it get worse in cleveland you ask? Well Hue could bring in the OC who orchestrated the absolute disaster of an offense for the Bengals at the start of the season.

It's like he's just thumbing his loving nose at fans at this point. Just loving hell. gently caress you Hue go in the goddamn lake already you useless poo poo.

https://twitter.com/alexmarvez/status/948316678588391424

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Good news goons you can find love at the parade thanks to FarmersOnly and CurvesConnect .com who have joined in sponsoring the parade!

https://twitter.com/fox8news/status/948999439833862147

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
A Haslam has acknowledged the family's displeasure with the parade.

God even if Jimmy goes to prison we won't be rid of these shits.

https://twitter.com/wkyc/status/949320986285039616

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

TheHoosier posted:

what's the best sports bar around downtown cleveland? or the best brewery to visit? we're gonna need it

Relevant

https://twitter.com/Reflog_18/status/949454594077347840

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Organizer stream

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TCgq4IvyYQg

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
and here come the players to alienate the fanbase

https://twitter.com/Danny_Shelton55/status/949684011995160578

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

shyduck posted:

Some Browns players are not happy about the parade

https://twitter.com/EmanOgbah/status/949643960158433280
https://twitter.com/Danny_Shelton55/status/949684011995160578

A few thoughts:

1: 0-16
2: The fans have been putting up with this bullshit franchise long before these players were around
3: 0-16

Shelton started mass blocking people for taking umbridge with him. Banner day for the entire organization.

Quiet Feet posted:

drat, I missed this so I guess I'll just catch next year's parade.

They'll be archiving it on this dudes youtube
https://twitter.com/AllaireMatt

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Vando posted:

If you're going to have a public meltdown about a silly parade I'm pretty sure you don't have the mental toughness to play in the NFL, cut these guys immediately imo

Is he still going? Can't see being blocked.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

purkey posted:

I understand the players being annoyed, but that true fan bs Ogbah and Shelton tweeted is dumb as heck.

Yeah I was already sick of the "true fan" bullshit from talking heads but hearing players say it. gently caress em I don't care how good they're supposed to be they can go.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Chris James 2 posted:

When's Hue going in the lake

He's going to wuss out and do it in summer if at all.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

ChrisBTY posted:

Players and coaches have 2 acceptable responses to this.
1) I'm sorry.
2) Silence.

This is the grave you dug. This is the funeral you deserve.

Also: gently caress playing the "true fan" card. Even if that designation only exists for masochists to leverage their pain into some kind of moral superiority your franchise doesn't deserve fans, true or otherwise.

I'll take silence as most of the players are doing. I've got poo poo for players pulling true fan on people. gently caress them and see if you actually make another roster.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Players keep taking this really well

https://twitter.com/Kirksey/status/949855972058648577

https://twitter.com/Kirksey/status/949858828585259008

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Kirksey backed off being Christ surrounded by Romans a bit

https://twitter.com/Kirksey/status/950028843452166144

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Gatts posted:

So....the Browns. The Browns?

The answer to: who is going to hire the architect of Ciny's 2 scoreless games and draft Josh Allen at #1?

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Yudo posted:

They have two picks in the top five in what is a pretty strong draft. The probability of not loving up those two picks is pretty good by chance alone.

Our owner Jimmy Haslam spent 100k on a study to find the best QB in 2014 class. That study said to draft Teddy Bridgewater and flagged Johnny Manziel as undraftable.

Hope is a lie and I know no better than to do so.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Yudo posted:

My team is owned by Dan Snyder, so I feel your pain. All the Browns have to do is pick Barkley, Chubb, Fitzpatrick, Nelson, Payne, Kay, James or even Darnold or Rosen and not draft Josh Allen or Baker Mayfield. How hard can that be?

We're actually really good at guard :smith:

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Ches Neckbeard posted:

Kirksey backed off being Christ surrounded by Romans a bit

https://twitter.com/Kirksey/status/950028843452166144

Quoting myself for context.

He put together offending fans might just hurt t-shirt sales. Christ this loving team

https://kirksey58.com/

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Submarine Sandpaper posted:

who the heck would buy the current jersey colors. Gotta wait until after 2020.

I like orange. that's the only reason I would.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Skwirl posted:

Kirk Cousins is way younger than I thought he was, I don't know why he'd want to play for the Browns aside from just not wanting to play for the team with the most racist name in all of American professional sports. Money I guess, but isn't he already the highest paid quarterback ever and don't most really rich athletes make most of their money from poo poo other than actually playing their sport?

Are Cleveland winters milder than DC ones?

He really loving hates Dan Snyder. Dude would play anywhere to get away from him.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Happy Noodle Boy posted:

Browns still have the most cap space, right? Like if they wanted him they could absolutely get him? This is assuming the front office isn't a bunch of loving morons this time around.

110mil in space this year. Actually more than when we went into FA previously.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Yudo posted:

Not at all. DC has gentle winters relative to Cleveland. DC summer though is hot and miserable. Cousins played at Michigan State and throws the ball fine in the rain, so I don't know that weather will be a big concern.


The rumors are that he actually likes Snyder. The problem is with the coach and perhaps the GM as well.

Kirk would be insane to go to Cleveland, however, assuming Denver opens up the cap to make a play or Jacksonville comes calling (and they would be idiots not to).

Snyder put the kibosh on every extension negotiation. There is no GM right now just team president Bruce Allen who made a career being Snyders right hand.

A player finally took it well
https://twitter.com/TheSchoGoesOn53/status/951482282715598849

Ches Neckbeard fucked around with this message at 17:56 on Jan 11, 2018

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!
Confirmed Belichick didn't want to send Jimmy to Cleveland.

https://twitter.com/RuiterWrongFAN/status/951519931010560000

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Michael Corleone posted:

I am very perturbed at the amount of people advocating for taking Barkley at #1 if we sign Cousins (lol) or somehow don't want to take a QB at 1. You auction that pick off, once the Giants get wind of this they will give us something for a pick swap, and other teams will give more. I want Darnold but if YOU don't want a QB at one you trade the pick. This isn't from people here, people on Browns forums and FB really want Barkley number 1!

I have misgivings about Barkleys disappearance as the season progressed. He's probably gone at 3 if not 1. I'm a huge take your QB early guy though this year. I don't think Gettleman bites on a trade though with Rosen talking and him being the clear top qb.

People seem to have convinced themselves Cousins is coming for sure, Keenum is a can't miss and Smith is younger and better than he is. Among browns fans anyway.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Salvor_Hardin posted:

This rules. Are they really able to make meals for $0.25 each? That's really impressive.

Places that supply food banks are dirt cheap.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Bigass Moth posted:

Smith is only 33 and in his prime.

34 by the season starts and he's a game manager. Granted a massive upgrade but the fans I've seen are ignoring his previous decade of game managing for his 1 year surrounded by after the catch monsters. They really think he'll replicate this year heading into Cleveland.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

Mr. Nice! posted:

If the browns are able to sign cousins they need to spend basically all their draft picks on OL and they'll be good.

The guards are good, center and not Joe are average and Joe...we'll see if he's back and back to form. Backup replacement for Joe is trash against speed rushers. So everyone. Kizer couldn't figure out how to throw a loving ball inside a minute when Joe was healthy. He seriously had a ton of time in the pocket just wouldn't throw.

Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

MY NIGGA D-LINK posted:

This is exactly who Josh Gordon is, and theoretically Coleman too. Duke Johnson has pretty damned good hands out of the backfield too. That's an impressive set of weapons, and with Barkley, whew lad, he could manage the poo poo out of that offense just fine

Hue is retaining play calling duties with input from Ken "who is AJ Green?" Zampese.

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Ches Neckbeard
Dec 3, 2005

You're all garbage, back up the truck BACK IT UP!

rare Magic card l00k posted:

that's a joke right

we are hiring a non-hue person to call plays right

Nope. Zampese is QB coach and according to press release will "have input on play calling"

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