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We had a literal jailhouse lawyer once, who got put away for pedophile poo poo. He would find out which cases the prosecutor on his case were working, and draft up bs motions on them to make busy work and hopefully get his own case tossed/reduced. I ended up with one of the cases (way back when I was prosecution), in which defendant had robbed a shooting range, stolen a car, and used the guns from the shooting range to rob a gas station. He was positively ID'd after they pulled over the stolen vehicle by his own mother, who was in the back seat. Senior advising prosecutor on the case told me the Feds were eventually going to get around to prosecuting this guy for Convicted Felon Possessing a Firearm, but it had been 3-4 years since the case was filed, and no movement from the feds yet. Lots of motions filed by the defendant, though, that kept the case stalled. Defendant apparently loved being in pre-trial lockup, ruled the place like a king. Fired about 9 different defense attorneys. The one I was working with kept asking for time served, but our offer was 8 years and we weren't going to budge on that, especially with the looming possible fed takeover of the case. Defense attorney scoffed and said that wasn't happening, and filed a motion to dismiss for the delay caused by all the motions the defense had filed. The judge dismissed the motion and set trial for the next day. Another motion was filed immediately to delay trial. The next week, out of nowhere, the feds call us and say they're taking it. Writing that letter to defense counsel informing him of that was an especially sweet moment. He tried in vain to file a motion to keep the case in local court, which of course didn't fly. The client, still assured by his jailhouse lawyer friend that everyone was full of poo poo, went to trial on it in federal court, and lost badly, receiving over twice the amount of years in sentencing than what we'd offered. Jailhouse lawyer did this with at least five other cases, which all went to trial and all got guilty verdicts, resulting in massive jail sentences for all involved. He also eventually got tried and convicted, and I believe he's still in jail at the moment.
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Aug 20, 2018 05:17
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nm posted:What do you do with your inmates? Big prison for locally convicted, with a jail near the courthouse for pre-trial detainees. Federal convicts go stateside.
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Aug 21, 2018 05:55
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It's fairly simple, using time-honored techniques - *sits hunched over Ouija board* "i...d...o...n...o...t...w...i...s...h...t...o...c...r...e...a...t... AW GODDAMNIT" *flips over board*
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Aug 21, 2018 07:14
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algebra testes posted:Oh gently caress Im sad there is a new thread because I cant empty quote all my posts about law school and then be like "oh now I do bush law for a living" We have plenty to do, and surprisingly good internet due to being part of the trans-Pacific pipeline of internet cables. No concerts though. We get bands 10+ years after they’re relevant, if at all. I think our most recent group was Bone Thugs n Harmony.
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Aug 23, 2018 13:42
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And  This is part of the waterfall garden I’m working on at the new house.
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Aug 30, 2018 11:03
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Nice piece of fish posted:That already looks gorgeous. Do you have a natural stream running through your property? That has amazing potential. Sort of. The lot had a slight downhill grade, downhill side facing the ocean. So the plan was to build a 3-storey place into the side of the hill, with the first floor being largely underground, as a separate apartment. We started digging, and the contractor calls me and says 'big problem' - I go there, and while it was nice to see that the dig was into solid rock instead of mushy clay, for land stability reasons, the rock was seeping water - not 100% sure still if it's a natural spring, or if it's a leak from a reservoir atop the hill nearby. Either way, it meant a 6-month delay while we redid the plans, pushed the house out 8-10 ft from the wall, and had to retest the soil at the new far points. So a beautiful but costly find.
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Aug 31, 2018 05:03
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I see a full size huntsman maybe once every two or three years, baby sized ones maybe once every six-eight months. Orb spiders don’t even register for me since I sprint face first through their webs at full speed every weekend, and I’m fairly arachnophobic.
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Aug 31, 2018 15:00
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Hoshi posted:Hey island experts, anything super scary I should know about in Bermuda? My 5th grade teacher said she lived there for awhile and there were foot-long centipedes, mildly venomous.
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Aug 31, 2018 15:02
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Mr. Nice! posted:I'm just saying there are plenty of reasons to pick on Guam besides making something up in your mind about dangerous spiders. I mean ask him how his teeth look since he's undoubtably addicted to betlenut at this point. One of the partners at the firm I worked with had a big betel nut addiction from the years he worked in Palau, and good lord were his teeth a wreck. The stains were one thing, the gum damage from the lime mix was another. The rock lime, not the fruit lime.
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Aug 31, 2018 15:26
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Elected judges always run on the 'tough on crime' slate, none of them run on the 'sensible on crime' one. Even appointed judges will have wide variation - we have 8 appointed lower court judges here, and a conviction on a medium level felony will have a massive sentencing disparity. We did a study on the sentences handed down for vehicular homicide once, and the results were so all over the map it was insane, even with similar circumstances. The US is also much more into the Retribution angle of sentencing. There's a weird bloodlust for punishing criminals you don't see in other jurisdictions. Victims get given a megaphone and their own newspaper columns, and anything less than a maximum sentence is a slap in their faces, and AG/prosecutors will get publicly censured for it. So you have the public, the judges, and the prosecution all on board for maximum punishment. The only mitigating factors are a prosecutor who is willing to take some heat to do the right thing, or who is just overworked and wants to get rid of cases that won't get him pilloried. Defense attorneys do what they can, but quite often are at the mercy of a society where 'rights of the accused' are no longer a big deal. Sentencing guidelines were supposed to be to create predictable, unified sentences, but can be used to target certain parts of society.
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Sep 4, 2018 01:37
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Sab0921 posted:I have unfortunate news - I have spent some time in D&D
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Sep 10, 2018 09:20
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We had a guy on domestic violence diversion program, which included a provision for 'no drinking alcohol', appear on a local commercial in which he's at a bar drinking a beer and saying how it tastes better than the competitor's beer. Probation office dings him, he comes in and tells the judge that it was fake beer. She says 'oh so you're lying to the public about how much better X beer tastes?' and then gives him a slap on the wrist.
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Oct 11, 2018 02:04
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Tokelau All Star posted:What a doofus. The early games start around 3AM Monday, we just DVR the GB games and start watching at ~7AM or so, FF'ing through the commercials and strolling into work around 9. Daylight savings kind of borks things up a bit, though, so that it's tougher to watch the second halves of Tues Morning Football or Fri Morning Football at lunch.
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Oct 12, 2018 04:45
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I’m in toxicated.
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Oct 17, 2018 13:29
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Guam only got winged again, so we're fine. Tinian got the worst of it, with Saipan immediately nearby getting p wrecked as well. The early pics out of there look bad, but not horrific.
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Oct 25, 2018 06:30
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In today's episode of How Dumb Was My Legislature: https://www.guampdn.com/story/news/2018/11/29/8-m-deficit-prompts-request-bill-session-agenda/2143189002/ tl;dr - Law increased taxes on buildings valued at $1 million. Forgot to add the words 'or more' to the end of that.
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Nov 30, 2018 05:23
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Won an appeal (heard 3 months ago) today regarding one of our local zoning board's actions - the Real Party in Interest did all the work and research, I filed a joinder and showed up to the hearing and threw shade at the appellant for being a whiny baby. Which was, in retrospect, not the greatest idea as opposing counsel won an election and is now my boss.
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Dec 14, 2018 01:17
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Tokelau All Star posted:How much is rent in Saipan? Pretty drat cheap, actually. No military means no artificial inflation, so 2-bedrooms go for around 400-700/mo., and an actual house isn't too much more than that.
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Dec 14, 2018 02:59
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They have power restored, most of the damage was done to wood/tin structures - the concrete ones did ok. I also got permission to duck out of a board meeting early to help rescue a coconut crab hunter who was lost in the jungle.
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Dec 14, 2018 06:40
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>4 inches and without eggs is fine. No undersized crabs.
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Dec 14, 2018 09:54
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ActusRhesus posted:Agreed. I have had it with these motherfucking Snakes in Suits on this motherfucking plane!
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Dec 17, 2018 05:10
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When I was working for a judge we decided a case on an issue/caselaw that hadn't been cited by either party, because both sides missed something fairly obvious. The attorney for the winning side was extremely impressed with our basic research, and speaks very highly of me. I feel no need to correct her.
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Dec 19, 2018 04:52
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I had to explain to a former AG here once that offering a plea deal for the maximum amount allowed, to a defendant who was already serving 20 years and whose cooperation we were seeking, was not a winning strategy. I was unable to get that point across. I left soon after that, and that case did not go well.
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Dec 24, 2018 04:11
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nm posted:I feel bad for anyone who fled their country and ends up in Houston. I’ve described Manila as the Houston of Asia, and vice versa.
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Jan 24, 2019 11:24
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"Hmm, this guy with 15+ years experience who lives in a different time zone is probably going to think I'm threatening his job prospects with my upcoming 170+ LSAT and Summa Cum Laude. Probably safe to ignore what he has to say."
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Jan 28, 2019 07:43
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Murrah posted:Is anyone aware of a jurisdiction where you would legitimately say it is difficult to fire people 'for poor performance' because of something law related? Basically every single time In my life I have encountered someone saying "its hard to fire people" it seems like its really just a bureaucratic/organizational failure of management, or maybe its just a difficult and uncomfortable thing that people will always mess up somehow as basic as you can make the process. https://www.guampdn.com/story/news/local/2019/02/02/guam-supreme-court-hearing-plumber-resinstated/2729741002/ I have lost one case in the last 10 years, and it was my current department's attempt to fire someone for missing a year's worth of work with no medical excuse provided until 3 months post-firing. The other side admitted every fact we presented - the two previous adverse actions, the warnings, the reminder for the need for doctor's notes, the emails, the 'literally going to the employee's house to see what was up'. They just said the employee had major depression, and that was why no response was given. And that was enough to not only win the case for them, despite our side doing everything possible to accommodate, but get the votes of all 4 commissioners (they only need 1 to win.) I would say firing people from gov here works about 15% of the time, with 50% of cases being thrown out for not following the process correctly.
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Feb 4, 2019 04:39
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Woof. Wouldn’t want to have any part of that.
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Feb 7, 2019 10:46
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Don't Be A Lawyer. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QsxgXgo7ipQ
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Apr 22, 2019 00:08
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Well don’t own a Subaru then.
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Jun 13, 2019 20:52
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Nice piece of fish posted:0 118 999 881 999 119 725 3 I appreciate this.
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Jul 10, 2019 14:06
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We had a prosecutor here a long time ago who got an attorney who usually does immigration work to agree to an open plea on a DUI. 2 to 90 days, 2 was the mandatory minimum that was required, and was the usual punishment for any first-time offender DUI. Well, the defendant had been arrested before for it and not charged, so the prosecutor made the argument to the court that it was like a second offense. Opposing counsel made a simplistic argument, and the judge, who was a bit simple and had a terrible temper (wrote an op-ed in the paper about a lawfirm that played him, got himself recused off handling any of their cases ever again), gave the guy 90 days in jail. Opposing counsel gets off the case and hands it to an actual crim defense attorney, the prosecutor moves to a different job and I get the case. Actual crim def attorney points out nine different ways the judge hosed up the plea acceptance, two of which were automatic overturns at the appellate level, so I agree to a 2-day sentence and close out the thing. Not a lot of open plea bargaining in criminal cases after that one went down for a few years.
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Jul 16, 2019 01:41
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Beefeater1980 posted:Do US states have land registers? We’ve been all registry in the UK since before I qualified in the dim and distant early 2000s. Usually in states with Torrens systems - 20% have some form of it.
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Jul 18, 2019 07:28
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I’m at a conference and the Chief Justice of a particular jurisdiction next to me is constantly snorting and belching at a level that only irritates our table.
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Sep 16, 2019 06:22
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blarzgh posted:Depo today: Has this man never heard of steak
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Oct 4, 2019 03:23
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Welp. My wife’s friend got assassinated while serving as an acting AG in Micronesia. Don’t go, no jobs, get shot in your front yard after walking your dog. gently caress.
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Oct 15, 2019 22:37
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She’d gotten some threatening emails, ignored them because she was leaving the island before the end of the month. They have a good idea of who it was. Fucker shot the dog too.
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Oct 16, 2019 09:54
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The firm I worked for was initially interested in me after I prosecuted one of their associates in a DUI case and refused to give him a wrist slap. The case was taken from me by my boss, after which the defendant received a wrist slap.
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Jan 8, 2020 07:46
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Lost mine a few years ago at 17 years old due to similar things. It’s rough, I wish you the best. 17 was a good, full life for a good cat.
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Jun 20, 2020 04:01
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algebra testes posted:I did enjoy all the goons in far flung places. A couple of threads ago the running joke was Moose Law? Something about if you kill a moose you can take the road kill and eat it in Alaska or wherever. Yep still on Guam. We've had a few goon and goon-adjacent lawyers come through as well. They're constantly hiring prosecutors and civil attorneys at the local government level. Covid is pretty much gone from here, I've gotten both my shots. I've banked an ungodly amount of leave, can't wait until the world opens up again and go on vacation.
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Mar 11, 2021 05:23
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Has anyone else run into this property law issue: Quitclaim deed, A quitclaims Blackacre unto B and/or C. They use "and/or" for the drat language. Does the /or get ignored? Does the deed fail? WTF? Is mine the only jurisdiction where this happens with maddening frequency?
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May 26, 2021 07:12
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