I'm sorry BYOB, but I can't post here anymore

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > I'm sorry BYOB, but I can't post here anymore

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Escape From Noise

Killing them softly with my posts

# ? Dec 2, 2019 04:36

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 15, 2024 16:54

google THIS

Let's get this thread to 420 pages and then MERCILESSLY SLAUGHTER IT, er, in a chill way.

# ? Dec 2, 2019 04:52

Goons Are Gifts

Maybe the last post id will end with 69, too

# ? Dec 2, 2019 05:05

Escape From Noise

Lol. All of my threads are DOA. Get on my level, OP.

# ? Dec 2, 2019 05:31

UberCereals: I LIKE BEING SHITTY TO PEOPLE BECAUSE I AM INSECURE AND UNINTELLIGENT, PLEASE VALIDATE MY BULLSHIT BECAUSE BEING AN ASSHOLE IS MY ONLY REAL PERSONALITY TRAIT

Look at the state of my avatar and signature.

I came in, posted twice on a bad comedown and - BAM.

Therefore

I'm sorry BYOB, but I can't post here anymore.

Ever.

Again.

# ? Dec 2, 2019 07:59

UberCereals: I LIKE BEING SHITTY TO PEOPLE BECAUSE I AM INSECURE AND UNINTELLIGENT, PLEASE VALIDATE MY BULLSHIT BECAUSE BEING AN ASSHOLE IS MY ONLY REAL PERSONALITY TRAIT

Not just that, my avatar was an image I edited in Illustrator for SPEAK UP FLAKES

i.e. if it's on the server please let me have it back because can't be found on google images etc. thank you thank you please ok bye

# ? Dec 2, 2019 08:02

Escape From Noise

Marry, gently caress, kill but it's with threads

# ? Dec 2, 2019 08:15

Half-wit: Half a wit more than baby Asahel, or half a wit less? You decide.

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Lol. All of my threads are DOA. Get on my level, OP.

Working on it.

*pulls out the thread poison* They're in the walls again.

# ? Dec 2, 2019 10:04

Goons Are Gifts

I'm cool with threads dying. They get to join their friends in Valhalla, eat plenty and play with their friends, pet some cute animals and sing songs. I was a big advocate of pushing threads after page 5 into an automatic DNR so we can be sure they rest in piece.

But why do you have to kill them so brutally?? Why can't it be a nice and peaceful slumber? What satisfaction does this give you??

# ? Dec 2, 2019 12:34

Half-wit: Half a wit more than baby Asahel, or half a wit less? You decide.

Goons Are Great posted:

I'm cool with threads dying. They get to join their friends in Valhalla, eat plenty and play with their friends, pet some cute animals and sing songs. I was a big advocate of pushing threads after page 5 into an automatic DNR so we can be sure they rest in piece.

But why do you have to kill them so brutally?? Why can't it be a nice and peaceful slumber? What satisfaction does this give you??

After my first thread kill I felt shame. An entire series of posts, cut short. I wasn't god. I shouldn't have played god.

But the more time went on, and the long arm of the law never reached out, and the expected smiting never came...my thoughts began to twist.

Maybe thread killing was what god wanted all along. I grabbed my thread killing keyboard and snuck out into the forums. There would be more spilled words today.

# ? Dec 2, 2019 13:15

Heather Papps: hello friend

i don't kill the thread, but i do butcher it and use every part

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 2, 2019 13:34

Half-wit: Half a wit more than baby Asahel, or half a wit less? You decide.

*hears a knock on the door and goes to answer it*

"Hello sir, this is Officer Memez with the Threaderal Bureau of Investigations. We'd like to ask you a couple of questions about a thread last seen on 06:15 Nov 22, 2019. Do you have a few minutes to talk?"

# ? Dec 2, 2019 13:35

Chevy Slyme: We're Gonna Run.

We're Gonna Crawl.

Kick Down Every Wall.

How many killed threads does it take to qualify as a serial killer of threads?

Can we get a hit true crime podcast out of this

# ? Dec 2, 2019 14:03

Heather Papps: hello friend

CaptainPsyko posted:

How many killed threads does it take to qualify as a serial killer of threads?

Can we get a hit true crime podcast out of this

lol hey friends im suzy cider and this is byob: build yonder, on bones! the first ever podcast. first let me get my advertisements out of the way. buttz69, the cool new app!

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 2, 2019 14:09

magic cactus: We lied. We are not at war. There is no enemy. This is a rescue operation.

It started with lurking.

Watching cool people post from afar, laughing at their jokes, wishing I could :emptyquote:

along with them. Wishing I could post too. A hunger that deepened with every goldmined thread.

One day, feeling brave, I made my first post. Something went wrong. No emptyquotes. No 5's. Just silence, people scrolling past my posts as though they didn't exist, as though I didn't exist.

Inside me, the hunger grew. But it was different now. Alien, sharper.

The first time I killed a thread, I wept with a sickening joy. The power was intoxicating. One simple little post from me and it would all be over. The jokes, the emptyquotes. I held the entire thread at the mercy of my keyboard.

Now, killing threads is the only thing makes me feel truly alive.

I don't know how to stop it, this hunger, and if I'm honest, I don't know that I really want to. One thing is for sure though.

I've killed threads before, and I'll kill them again.

I might even kill yours.

:unsmigghh:

Thanks to Saoshyant for the amazing spring '23 sig!

# ? Dec 2, 2019 19:11

Heather Papps: hello friend

magic cactus posted:

It started with lurking.

Watching cool people post from afar, laughing at their jokes, wishing I could along with them. Wishing I could post too. A hunger that deepened with every goldmined thread.

One day, feeling brave, I made my first post. Something went wrong. No emptyquotes. No 5's. Just silence, people scrolling past my posts as though they didn't exist, as though I didn't exist.

Inside me, the hunger grew. But it was different now. Alien, sharper.

The first time I killed a thread, I wept with a sickening joy. The power was intoxicating. One simple little post from me and it would all be over. The jokes, the emptyquotes. I held the entire thread at the mercy of my keyboard.

Now, killing threads is the only thing makes me feel truly alive.

I don't know how to stop it, this hunger, and if I'm honest, I don't know that I really want to. One thing is for sure though.

I've killed threads before, and I'll kill them again.

I might even kill yours.

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 2, 2019 19:34

Escape From Noise

Vehicular threadslaughter

Thank you Pot Smoke Pheonnix for this Kickin' Rad sig

# ? Dec 2, 2019 19:36

Heather Papps: hello friend

drive by thread killah

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 2, 2019 19:37

Goons Are Gifts

magic cactus posted:

It started with lurking.

Watching cool people post from afar, laughing at their jokes, wishing I could along with them. Wishing I could post too. A hunger that deepened with every goldmined thread.

One day, feeling brave, I made my first post. Something went wrong. No emptyquotes. No 5's. Just silence, people scrolling past my posts as though they didn't exist, as though I didn't exist.

Inside me, the hunger grew. But it was different now. Alien, sharper.

The first time I killed a thread, I wept with a sickening joy. The power was intoxicating. One simple little post from me and it would all be over. The jokes, the emptyquotes. I held the entire thread at the mercy of my keyboard.

Now, killing threads is the only thing makes me feel truly alive.

I don't know how to stop it, this hunger, and if I'm honest, I don't know that I really want to. One thing is for sure though.

I've killed threads before, and I'll kill them again.

I might even kill yours.

# ? Dec 3, 2019 00:30

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

magic cactus posted:

It started with lurking.

Watching cool people post from afar, laughing at their jokes, wishing I could along with them. Wishing I could post too. A hunger that deepened with every goldmined thread.

One day, feeling brave, I made my first post. Something went wrong. No emptyquotes. No 5's. Just silence, people scrolling past my posts as though they didn't exist, as though I didn't exist.

Inside me, the hunger grew. But it was different now. Alien, sharper.

The first time I killed a thread, I wept with a sickening joy. The power was intoxicating. One simple little post from me and it would all be over. The jokes, the emptyquotes. I held the entire thread at the mercy of my keyboard.

Now, killing threads is the only thing makes me feel truly alive.

I don't know how to stop it, this hunger, and if I'm honest, I don't know that I really want to. One thing is for sure though.

I've killed threads before, and I'll kill them again.

I might even kill yours.

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 02:21

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

magic cactus posted:

It started with lurking.

Watching cool people post from afar, laughing at their jokes, wishing I could along with them. Wishing I could post too. A hunger that deepened with every goldmined thread.

One day, feeling brave, I made my first post. Something went wrong. No emptyquotes. No 5's. Just silence, people scrolling past my posts as though they didn't exist, as though I didn't exist.

Inside me, the hunger grew. But it was different now. Alien, sharper.

The first time I killed a thread, I wept with a sickening joy. The power was intoxicating. One simple little post from me and it would all be over. The jokes, the emptyquotes. I held the entire thread at the mercy of my keyboard.

Now, killing threads is the only thing makes me feel truly alive.

I don't know how to stop it, this hunger, and if I'm honest, I don't know that I really want to. One thing is for sure though.

I've killed threads before, and I'll kill them again.

I might even kill yours.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 04:08

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

All these threads, like tears in rain

Time to post

# ? Dec 4, 2019 04:09

Crypto Cobain: by Reene

hamjobs posted:

All these threads, like tears in rain

Time to post

# ? Dec 4, 2019 05:01

Dick Bastardly: Muttley is SKYNET!!!

Not it! Haha

Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:31

Dick Bastardly: Muttley is SKYNET!!!

wait....

Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:31

Dick Bastardly: Muttley is SKYNET!!!

Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:32

google THIS

Even when you resurrect a long dead thread, it's only so you can immediately kill it again. A thread's fate is to die repeatedly, hopefully at least 16,800 times.

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:34

Dick Bastardly: Muttley is SKYNET!!!

google THIS posted:

Even when you resurrect a long dead thread, it's only so you can immediately kill it again. A thread's fate is to die repeatedly, hopefully at least 16,800 times.

that is loving hardcore

thats right, i said it
i said the gently caress word and i darn well meant it

Awesome winter sig by Symbolic, love it!

Lovely sig by the masterful Matoi Ryuko, thanks!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:38

Escape From Noise

Die thread! DIIIIIIIIIIE!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 17:55

Heather Papps: hello friend

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Die thread! DIIIIIIIIIIE!

live thread! liiiiiiive!

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 18:30

Escape From Noise

Heather Papps posted:

live thread! liiiiiiive!

Ironic. The very person trying to save the thread...killed it.

Nowait!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 18:36

Heather Papps: hello friend

SweetWillyRollbar posted:

Ironic. The very person trying to save the thread...killed it.

Nowait!

bump

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 4, 2019 18:37

Chevy Slyme: We're Gonna Run.

We're Gonna Crawl.

Kick Down Every Wall.

Thread lives, thread dies, thread lives again!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 03:06

google THIS

The thread is dead, long live the thread!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 15:35

Heather Papps: hello friend

hamjobs posted:

All these threads, like tears in rain

Time to post

*backflips into a snake pit*

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 17:01

Heather Papps: hello friend

google THIS posted:

The thread is dead, long live the thread!

welcome to the new thread, same as the old thread

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 17:09

Pot Smoke Phoenix: Smoke 'em if you gottem!

Dick Bastardly posted:

Not it! Haha

Counterpoint:

NOT IT!

https://i.imgur.com/QKTkerO.mp4
_{_{Sig elements by Manifisto and Heather Papps}}
Sig File protected by SigLock. do NOT steal this sig!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 17:15

Heather Papps: hello friend

Pot Smoke Phoenix posted:

Counterpoint:

NOT IT!

GODMODE im invincible now

thanks Dumb Sex-Parrot and deep dish peat moss for this winter bounty!

# ? Dec 5, 2019 17:24

Goons Are Gifts

I can't wait to find out how will kill this thread soon. I know who I'd place my money on

# ? Dec 6, 2019 00:06

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 15, 2024 16:54

Randy Travesty: PHANTOM QUEEN

It's me motherfucker

# ? Dec 6, 2019 00:11

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > BYOB Goldmine: Gold Mango > I'm sorry BYOB, but I can't post here anymore

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