- City of Glompton
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this morning when i woke up i had to inflate myself by blowing on my finger cartoon style before i could get out of bed
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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May 15, 2024 06:40
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- City of Glompton
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you've heard that time and pressure make diamonds, well it's true, after 8 hours under this thing i'm a 10 on the Mohs scale
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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- City of Glompton
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my girlfriend has started sticking four leaf clovers on my rear end before bed
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
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- City of Glompton
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on the plus side, no more wrinkles!
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Jan 3, 2020 01:13
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- City of Glompton
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I went to sleep on the sixty nineth floor
I woke up in the basement
ah you requested the turn down for what service
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Jan 3, 2020 03:43
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- City of Glompton
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lol
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Jan 6, 2020 05:17
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- City of Glompton
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rigging up my alarm clock to a drinking bird that starts my coffee pot which gets bumped by a bowling ball which closes the flip top go cup lid and launches the cup of joe into my dog's backpack, which wakes her up so she walks over a tripwire that cycles the clothes line with a milkbone tied to a string which lures her outside to Tony so he knows it's time to start up the crane and remove my blanket
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Jan 7, 2020 01:36
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- City of Glompton
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i put an electric blanket underneath my weighted blanket.
i call it the sleepy panini
this made me lol irl 
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Jan 7, 2020 01:39
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- City of Glompton
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"More weight!" I scream. The witchfinder frowns disapprovingly and gestures for the men to add another blanket. I lay prone beneath, dwarfed by the growing pile of blankets. The crowd watches with a mix of pity, fear, and awe. They had expected me to give up after the third, yet I have held my peace for five more hence. As the final blanket is added I let out an anguished groan. The judges lean in, anticipating my confession.
With the last of my strength I wheeze "more... weight..." before drifting off to dreamland. I am the coziest I have ever been.
The people of Salem jeer and boo, fed up with my poo poo.
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Jan 7, 2020 22:31
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- City of Glompton
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The princess and the pea only she can still feel the weight of a pea on top of many weighted blankets.
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Jan 7, 2020 22:31
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May 15, 2024 06:40
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- City of Glompton
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I have one and my cats fur it all up...am I supposed to put a cover it or something?
i think youre cats are trying to murder you in your sleep...just a little bit heavier, they say to each other as they luxuriate around and spread their shed
i'd be careful if i were you
thank you PSP for the beautiful spring sig
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Jan 14, 2020 06:23
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Jan 3, 2020 01:12
