|
B-Rock452 posted:I tried to but she only said she was going to the "chip store" and I don't know where that is. I asked her to draw me a map and she made a fart noise and ran away. Show me the lie.
|
#
¿
Apr 29, 2021 18:30
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 12, 2024 05:10 |
|
|
Another Bill posted:Please don't give the hacky yakkity sax answer. (and Luke's Change)
|
|
#
¿
Jul 29, 2021 22:39
|
|
|
Hello thread! We're six months away from joining y'all!
|
|
#
¿
Mar 22, 2023 03:52
|
|
|
lobster shirt posted:mazel tov, do you know if its going to be a boy or a girl yet? She got the generic screening blood test and it says girl. We're meeting the doctor next week to go over the results and I'm sure he'll tell us officially.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 22, 2023 04:11
|
|
|
I'm posting from the toilet so I assume my kid is equally hosed.
|
|
#
¿
Mar 30, 2023 01:15
|
|
|
 we have quickening!The law of Moses will now enforce stricter penalties for harming my wife!
|
|
#
¿
Apr 23, 2023 00:10
|
|
|
No middle name? E: speaking of names, I have a last name (which the baby is getting, despite Mrs The Owl keeping her last name when we married) which Ellis island spelled weird so it's always mispronounced, But the name the wife and I are leaning towards has the same vowel combination so I can either make sure baby The Owl never learns to spell by giving her both spellings,or do I declare a power move against English and use the weird spelling twice? HootTheOwl has issued a correction as of 23:55 on May 3, 2023 |
|
#
¿
May 3, 2023 23:50
|
|
|
What's the deal with white cribs? And toddler conversion thinggies? Aren't babies super dirty? Won't this white thing just be yellow the moment it touches my beautiful wonderful bundle of joy's mere aura?
|
|
#
¿
May 5, 2023 15:59
|
|
|
loquacius posted:White and grey furniture are in style these days for some reason, as a fan of brown woodgrain patterns it's hard to find stuff that isn't vintage sometimes I'm color blind so I see brown as red so I saw this reddish-brown crib and loved the color but it was too brown for her 
|
|
#
¿
May 5, 2023 16:16
|
|
|
loquacius posted:Thanks, everybody! Kid was just born and is doing great, already had his first good meal too 
|
|
#
¿
May 8, 2023 20:33
|
|
|
It's ok, totk probably sucks just like botw sucked. ...And now I've cursed my kid to go all in on Roblox
|
|
#
¿
May 13, 2023 20:41
|
|
|
In the Something Awful Forums, fecal based offenses are centered around the anus. In the Parenting Thread, the dedicated posters who investigate these vicious poopys are members of an elite squad known as the Special Changing Unit. There are their stories. 
|
|
#
¿
May 16, 2023 12:51
|
|
|
She's not even born yet and I'm already afraid we're going to ruin her based on mistakes to the baby registry
|
|
#
¿
Jun 6, 2023 14:07
|
|
|
KirbyKhan posted:When the time is right Ill explain that cops are like bears and if you ever see one in the environment just act accordingly. I would urge you not to try and make yourself look bigger in front of cops.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 8, 2023 17:16
|
|
|
KirbyKhan posted:Grizzley Bears, not brown bears Those are the same thing
|
|
#
¿
Jun 8, 2023 18:46
|
|
|
Mrs. The Owl is off getting her diabeties test. Her mom had it every pregnancy and her and her brother were giant-rear end babies, so I assume she will too.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 9, 2023 13:59
|
|
|
Strangelet Wave posted:my 4yo daughter asked me how much longer until the summer is over, and I told her about sixty days Congrats on turning her into a long termist
|
|
#
¿
Jun 18, 2023 13:15
|
|
|
According to my wife it's a thing to cut the top off the door so even if you ditch the monitor you can still watch
|
|
#
¿
Jun 21, 2023 21:27
|
|
|
I mean they went to home depott of the 1980s and cut the top two or so feet off the cheapest door they could find.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 22, 2023 04:45
|
|
|
OFC the one day a month my wife went into the office is the one day Chicago has the worst air quality on Earth. You could smell it in the air. At least cars have filters.
|
|
#
¿
Jun 28, 2023 12:39
|
|
|
AxGrap posted:What is rainbow friends? Jessie Jackson for kids?
|
|
#
¿
Jul 3, 2023 02:16
|
|
|
The Atomic Man-Boy posted:Can we just make the Glenn thread the mass shooting thread? The other Hoot already did 
|
|
#
¿
Jul 6, 2023 04:28
|
|
|
When I was a kid it was The Entertainer or turkey in the straw
|
|
#
¿
Jul 8, 2023 18:13
|
|
|
Back in my day we made our own porn. Slash writers, rise up!
|
|
#
¿
Jul 17, 2023 14:20
|
|
|
Tex is at a very high reading level
|
|
#
¿
Jul 20, 2023 21:29
|
|
|
Brandon Proust posted:this morning my daughter looked at a picture of me and said "papa!". then she looked at a picture of her mom and said "mama!". then she thought for a second and said "mapa!" Class reductionism
|
|
#
¿
Jul 29, 2023 03:09
|
|
|
BonHair posted:9 month old baby decided pretty suddenly that he's too big for milk or something. We don't really agree with him, but it's hard to force. I think it's because he's just super into real food, but milk would probably be a good idea still... The lactation people are telling us you shouldn't feed the baby anything but boob for a year And also stressed that the best food is whatever your baby eats. What does your pediatrician think?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 5, 2023 14:19
|
|
|
|
|
#
¿
Aug 22, 2023 13:21
|
|
|
Microplastics posted:I don't get it Cops shoot dogs
|
|
#
¿
Aug 23, 2023 16:43
|
|
|
loquacius posted:*Always Snuffy theme intensifies*
|
|
#
¿
Aug 25, 2023 12:49
|
|
|
We are 21 days from due date, and: Baby size is 91%ile Baby head size is 99%ile. They're pretty sure we're going to schedule a c-section either at today's appointment or next week, because while the human body is amazing this baby is not going to fit
|
|
#
¿
Aug 30, 2023 16:12
|
|
|
Doesn't the button stop them for a while if you hold it?
|
|
#
¿
Aug 31, 2023 23:28
|
|
|
It appears that Thursday morning I will be serving eviction papers to the baby who has made no downward motion inside my wife. Furthermore: This baby could fulfill several prophecies since thanks to IVF it was conceived free of original sin, and thanks to a C-section will also not be born of woman. For those of you who consider yourselves immortal double check the terms and conditions of your powers.
|
|
#
¿
Sep 7, 2023 19:56
|
|
|
Watching the nurses argue over rearranging the break room while I wait outside the OR "Why do you care?" "I care about every moment of my life"
|
|
#
¿
Sep 14, 2023 14:44
|
|
|
Baby born. Finally taking a snooze with her mom
|
|
#
¿
Sep 14, 2023 16:24
|
|
|
loquacius posted:Hey congrats! Any other ominous portents when she was born? My wife's spine is made out of bedrock and they couldn't give her either the spinal or epidural. She slept through the birth of her first child (I have to make this joke here where she'll never see it)
|
|
#
¿
Sep 14, 2023 17:26
|
|
|
Also fifty birds flew into the window but I'm sure that's just maintenance
|
|
#
¿
Sep 14, 2023 17:27
|
|
|
Baby gets a taste of booba, passes out Remove sleeping baby to crib, demands booba
|
|
#
¿
Sep 16, 2023 17:04
|
|
|
Blowout poop into pissed on while changing into spitup. Hit by all three
|
|
#
¿
Sep 20, 2023 23:59
|
|
|
|
| # ¿ May 12, 2024 05:10 |
|
|
I have renamed this kid Kudi in the hope she learns Day/Night
|
|
#
¿
Sep 21, 2023 07:51
|
|