Post the worst pizza ever in this thread: No Gods, No Mestres

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Post the worst pizza ever in this thread: No Gods, No Mestres

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Aardvark! posted:

maybe there's good manakeesh that like tucks the dust away under the cheese or something but by pics I've seen, it doesn't look like it

I thought they would use olive oil to bind it to the bread.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2021 21:08

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 12, 2024 21:36

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Aardvark! posted:

i think those might just be normal hard boiled un-cored eggs with a dollop of brazilian Orange Pizza Sauce TM

Yea, those are just sliced super-boiled eggs with orange stuff plopped on top. The pale layer under the orange is the yolk.

# ¿ Oct 7, 2021 00:22

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Quantum of Phallus posted:

A friend of a friend is over in Peru and ordered a medium pizza from Papa Johns:

Get them to see how small a small pizza is.

# ¿ Nov 14, 2021 05:01

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

We put peanut butter on unsweetened bread, we put jam and jelly on unsweetened bread, we put marshmallow spreads on unsweetened bread, we put fruit on unsweetened bread. What difference does it make if the bread is big and round.

The ingredients aren't the problem, it's the preparation and presentation. See also: every jacked up pepperoni pizza posted in here.

# ¿ Mar 4, 2022 05:37

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Captain Hygiene posted:

How about frog legs, pork and python meat
Also "swamp cabbage"

Swamp cabbage is the heart of the cabbage palm, a short little palm that grows in swamps.

# ¿ May 18, 2022 13:43

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

lobsterminator posted:

Am I being a dummy, but al tonno is a perfectly common pizza in Italy?

Is this some american meme that tuna cannot be on pizza?

There's a whole lot of wackass Italian pizzas in this thread. It might taste good, but I wouldn't use "is common in Italy" as a metric for anything about pizza.

# ¿ Jun 26, 2022 01:32

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Soul Dentist posted:

To be fair the worst Italian pizza crimes are labeled "pizza Americana" anyways:

Oh, I would consider the first pizzas in this post to be far worse than any of the Americanas pizzas.

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3940135&pagenumber=8&perpage=40&userid=224328#post519752042

# ¿ Jun 26, 2022 12:56

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

If you can get past the overpowering smell of rotten fruit and have it not taint the taste, you do you.

itry posted:

Is that... is that sugar?

Coconut powder.

# ¿ Jul 17, 2022 01:12

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Or do a Neo Kobe. Ramen counts as soup.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2022 21:37

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Put candied lemon rind on your dessert pizza.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2022 21:33

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

uber_stoat posted:

these things easily defeat St Louis in the badzza battle. breathtaking, really. hey Pennsylvania, are you ok?

To be fair, it's only one specific town in Pennsylvania.

# ¿ Feb 5, 2023 19:26

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

ekuNNN posted:

https://twitter.com/Infyrno23/status/1627082880756387841

That is a cooked standard pizza with tomato sauce dumped on top. Who does that?

# ¿ Feb 22, 2023 21:07

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Gimme all the thick, pillowy pizza dough. Even better if the outside is crispy and kinda greasy.

# ¿ Apr 1, 2023 19:50

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Why even cut the hole? Pita bread pizza is common as hell.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2023 01:44

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Filler and it absorbs pepperoni grease that seeps down.

# ¿ Jun 22, 2023 12:45

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

maybealabia posted:

I think that's literally the entire point of the company

Yup, it's to get around the garbage restrictions on what you can buy with EBT.

# ¿ Oct 2, 2023 17:51

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

They're dough pressed in a cupcake pan, topped with your tomato sauce, cheese, and whatever else, then baked.

Pillsbury crescent dough is a quick shortcut.
https://www.pillsbury.com/recipes/pizza-cupcakes/eb2d7289-0048-4f37-b614-ab0a70b3947a

# ¿ Feb 10, 2024 19:11

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Tony Chachere's cajun seasoning goes on everything.

# ¿ Mar 3, 2024 21:05

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

That looks like the boba pearls were dumped on after the pizza was cold. If they were pressed into hot cheese they would at least stick to it.

# ¿ Mar 30, 2024 00:47

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Have you seen Italian pizzas

# ¿ Apr 2, 2024 03:09

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 12, 2024 21:36

Schubalts: Nov 26, 2007; People say bigger is better.

But for the first time in my life, I think I've gone too far.

Butter flavored margarine has a much stronger "butter" taste and smell than actual butter and it's so weird.

# ¿ May 10, 2024 18:59

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > Post the worst pizza ever in this thread: No Gods, No Mestres