[COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

The Something Awful Forums > Archives > Comedy Goldmine > The Goodmine > [COVID] 1 Million! We did it! :toot: :911:

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

what do you mean another covid thread?? I've been a good boy for over a year now this is ridiculous. I'm going to get a margarita

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 19:32

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 12:29

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

much like benghazi,

# ¿ Aug 16, 2021 19:41

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Platystemon posted:

I don�t understand why the software has trouble with long threads.

It only has to display one page at a time. There shouldn�t be a dependence on what�s on on every other page.

SEELCT * FROM table_name WHERE thread_id = ? ORDER BY post_date LIMIT 100000 OFFSET 50

This query will scan 100050 rows if an index on (thread_id, post_date) exists. What is on every other page does in fact matter.

There are some ways around this sort of pagination, but there are tradeoffs. It's hard to avoid if you want the ability to say "give me the 1709th page of this thread" for example.

Notorious R.I.M. fucked around with this message at 17:07 on Aug 17, 2021

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 17:05

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Mr Hootington posted:

Glenn is normally very right, but is quite the fucker when it comes to covid.
https://twitter.com/ggreenwald/status/1427681382847991816?s=19

https://twitter.com/ggreenwald/status/1427682752640569354?s=19

please keep the lovely lib in the lovely lib thread for him

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 18:29

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Forseti posted:

I have no idea what their code looks like, but it's not going to scan every row with an index there* if it's written in a way that can use the index (which yours is). Even if it did, 100k rows should be a joke to a modern server, especially with caches.

drat this is really going down the rabbit hole now, but expectations and reality aren't the same thing with budget relational databases. Example:

Create some test threads:

code:

mysql -uroot test -Bse "
    DROP TABLE IF EXISTS post;
    CREATE TABLE post (
      id INT AUTO_INCREMENT,
      post_id INT,
      thread_id INT,
      post_date INT,
      PRIMARY KEY (id),
      INDEX thread_id__post_date (thread_id, post_date)
    )"
for thread in {1..100}; do    # Parallelize w/ xargs if you really care about doing this fast
   for ((post=1; post <= ${RANDOM}; post++)); do
       mysql -uroot -Bse "INSERT INTO test.post VALUES (default, ${post}, ${thread}, ${RANDOM})"
   done
done

Perform a limit-offset paginated lookup:

code:

mysql> FLUSH STATUS;
Query OK, 0 rows affected (0.01 sec)

mysql> \P >/dev/null
PAGER set to '>/dev/null'
mysql> SELECT * FROM post WHERE thread_id = 81 ORDER BY post_date LIMIT 50 OFFSET 250;
50 rows in set (0.00 sec)

mysql> \P
Default pager wasn't set, using stdout.
mysql> SHOW SESSION STATUS LIKE 'Handler%';
+----------------------------+-------+
| Variable_name              | Value |
+----------------------------+-------+
| Handler_commit             | 1     |
| Handler_delete             | 0     |
| Handler_discover           | 0     |
| Handler_external_lock      | 2     |
| Handler_mrr_init           | 0     |
| Handler_prepare            | 0     |
| Handler_read_first         | 0     |
| Handler_read_key           | 1     |
| Handler_read_last          | 0     |
| Handler_read_next          | 299   |
| Handler_read_prev          | 0     |
| Handler_read_rnd           | 0     |
| Handler_read_rnd_next      | 0     |
| Handler_rollback           | 0     |
| Handler_savepoint          | 0     |
| Handler_savepoint_rollback | 0     |
| Handler_update             | 0     |
| Handler_write              | 0     |
+----------------------------+-------+

It performs 300 handler operations, 1 key lookup to the first row with a matching thread_id and 299 consecutive reads down the linked list. O(n). This also doesn't change based on table cardinality, limit-offset cardinality, or what the sampling statistics happen to look like.

This operation does get CPU-expensive when we get on the order of 100k+ rows being accessed many times a second. It's something that is fine in a vacuum and an issue at concurrency. Is there an efficient caching layer in front of vbulletin now? I'm not really sure. Posts are made often enough though that caches will be regularly invalidated.

I used to maintain vbulletin forums years ago and was a MySQL DBA until I quit a month ago. Large cardinality problems (like threads with a shitload of posts) are an extremely common style of resource consumption issue.

# ¿ Aug 17, 2021 20:01

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

gently caress You And Diebold posted:

https://twitter.com/ROCPassiveHouse/status/1371863229144690688

these cubes are going to become ubiquitous lol. good symbol of the future right here.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 01:44

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

SKULL.GIF posted:

do these box fans actually do anything? my first intuition is to think it's bullshit since students breathing out covid particles would spread to other students before it hit the box fan

They help reduce the circulation of fine particulates suspended in the air that virions cling to. They won't do much about large droplet exposure. I think it's the kind of thing where vaccinations + cubes + masks would currently provide enough mitigations to significantly reduce outbreaks in something like schools, but lol we're going to do like one of those at a time at most.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 02:03

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Otter_Sauce posted:

this doesn't look so good

Phil valentine update. Be isnt lookin so hot.

In the state he's in they're just prolonging his suffering by not pulling him off the vent. Maybe if they pray hard enough a miracle will happen and his lungs will uncheesify, though.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 02:37

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

mod sassinator posted:

childless wfh'ers who can cook for themselves and are happy to keep binge watching netflix, etc. are going to be just fine

those childless wfhers are all vacationing internationally and poo poo

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 19:47

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

brugroffil posted:

"masks are good because they allow us to avoid quarantines"

https://twitter.com/ProfEmilyOster/status/1428064884474920964

[Practical]

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 20:17

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

rules lawyering a virus is just pragmatism

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 20:18

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

brugroffil posted:

this is literally her advice for pregnant women!

You just have to pick n carefully!

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 20:23

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

brugroffil posted:

This is my own dumb thought, but might this mean that Delta is going to make it pretty hard for any other variants to get a foothold given how highly infectious it is? Yeah maybe some new variant will be cooked up that's twice as deadly, but if Delta is outcompeting everything still, it'll never catch on.

Yeah, I'm wondering if having only one variant circulating slows down the reinfection rates a bit. Prior to delta there were multiple circulating strains so resistance to one provides windows for others with a handful of different mutations to come in and infect someone instead. But with all of the other options squelched out, anything new has to sequentially mutate out of delta now. That being said, SARS-CoV-2 appears to mutate rapidly under the right selective pressures, and we've already seen mutations go completely global before (although maybe convergently) like D614G.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 20:50

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Google Butt posted:

Is it not possible that with the advances in vaccines that we develop something sterilizing?

Personally I think there's reasonable likelihood that vaccine sprays end up being sterilizing. Being able to maintain a strong antibody response in the region you want (mucus membranes near the respiratory tract) may be what's required to shred the virus before it can start replicating in useful numbers.

# ¿ Aug 18, 2021 20:59

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Thoguh posted:

I think the difference is that "trusting science" means you trust data, analysis, the scientific method, etc. The C-SPAM COVID thread trusts science. But "Trusting The Science is just religious deflection to the people that you have declared to be the authorities and worshipping whatever they say as the unilateral truth, and the moment that truth changes as declared by the authorities you immediately change and never acknowledge they ever said anything different. The D&D Covid thread Trusts The Science.

The GBS thread trusts Joe Rogan.

"Trust Science" is a made up liberal truism with one goal: Conflate policymaking with research. The Science says we should lock down; The Science says we should open up. No, science doesn't say poo poo about this.

Science says if you lock down or open up that certain consequences are likely to happen. It's up to the policymakers to run the risk analysis and determine what outcome is most desirable. The policymakers have absolved themselves from any responsibility by saying that science simply told them what to do. Any policy failures must be the fault of science and scientists, not policymakers.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 19:02

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Pittsburgh Fentanyl Cloud posted:

I�ll probably keep riding my bike but only because it�s my only outlet right now, gently caress it. I�m on trails anyway.

you have a bike just embrace the fact that you will eventually become road paste

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 19:20

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Teabag Dome Scandal posted:

holy poo poo I thought the regeneron grift was a run of the mill pumping the stock grift I had no idea Florida was doing regeneron POPUPS at the loving LIBRARY. are these people paying out of pocket or something???

same that is loving incredible lmfao

# ¿ Aug 19, 2021 21:02

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Stereotype posted:

the future is impossible to predict unless you're a witch

always knew cspam was a witches coven

# ¿ Aug 21, 2021 05:53

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

SirPablo posted:

The vaccine has been widely available for months. Gov has done all sorts of incentives to get people jabbed. If anyone hasn't by now that choice is completely on them, not some systemic failure. But keep posting.

shut up bitch

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 16:37

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

College Rockout posted:

Uhh, your doctor isn't concerned about you doing this? I''m just a fitness hobbyist but that seems really high to be at for a whole workout. I was told that the rule of thumb for max safe heart rate was 220 minus your age so 180 for a 40yr old. And adding stimulants on top of that, ooph, i'm getting heart palpitations just thinking of that. This is the worst time to need emergency medical help.

Max HR has high population variability and 220 - age is an ok approximation at best. It's all meaningless without knowing their max HR from a test. High resting heart rate is much more meaningful as a health indicator than max HR.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 16:41

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Hard to tell if there is a wall of unsourced quotes or this thread has always been overrun by liberals (it has always been overrun by liberals)

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 16:43

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Louisgod posted:

lol do you think you’re posting in the D&D thread? people here are afraid to step outside their apartments, while libs were happy to throw away their masks when poppa biden declared victory on the 4th

I dunno but this certainly became the thread of personal responsibility!

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 16:46

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

AppleNippleBOB posted:

it's beautiful

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 17:05

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

SKULL.GIF posted:

the baloogan disease becoming prevalent in cspam is one of its more annoying traits

sorry bud if you blame vaccination status on personal responsibility the liberal... is yuo.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 17:08

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Raiad posted:

it feels like it shouldn't be impossible for the government to pay people to take a couple days off after a vaccine and also arrange a delivery service to the people who request it

i mean i know it is, but

They can arrange for a Lyft or Uber to pick you up and take you to a vaccination clinic. Just download this simple app

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 17:45

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Acute crises like hurricanes and floods bring people together. Prolonged crises like plague and famine drive them apart.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 18:21

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

SKULL.GIF posted:

at least you have been horny for death since january 2020. admirable consistency

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 18:40

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

empty whippet box posted:

anecdotal of course but I know lots of white and black people and I don't know a single black person who is the slightest bit vaccine hesitant and they all have the vaccine(I know because they all have those little facebook profile picture things saying so). Meanwhile there is more than one white person on my friends list who is currently sick with covid and one of them is taking ivermectin and they are all unvaccinated.

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 18:58

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Vaccination rates seem to go up when communities get ravaged by COVID though so maybe once delta has burned through everywhere it actually will just be the antivaxx chuds left over

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 18:59

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

E Depois do Adeus posted:

From a few pages back but do you have lit on this or is it just your observations?

Just observation

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 19:41

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Shere posted:

It's the primary excuse, not reason, and the thing about excuses is that it's excuses all the way down.

These aren't people making a qualitative, informed decision based on a set of facts, it's people starting from a conclusion and letting cognitive dissonance fill in the gaps.

The lack of approval from a specific government agency is just one of their most palatable, reasonable excuses requiring the least amount of mental gymnastics so they go with that one first. It's the easiest one to sell. If you take that one away you might get a small minority of people who make the decision that continuing down the path of delusion is more work than just getting the vaccine, but it's not going to be some revelatory moment that gets things back on the right course. We're talking about people who calibrate their decision making my seeing who gets angry at them. I should know because they comprise the majority of my blood relations and my unvaccinated mother is on vacation in Daytona right now.

Same way that the majority of them said they'd just quit if their job mandated vaccinations but as soon as it actually happens they all get the shot like a dog

# ¿ Aug 22, 2021 21:02

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Solarin posted:

3 loving weeks on ECMO seems excessive

seriously they could have let 3 other people die on ecmo during that time

# ¿ Aug 23, 2021 04:56

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

drat it must be a great time to be a bullshit medicine seller

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 05:37

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

forysthia was another one of those cute expectation vs reality errors in Contagion. expectation: forsythia, reality: fish tank cleaner, bleach, horse dewormer

# ¿ Aug 24, 2021 05:39

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

fosborb posted:

Matty: if I can't gently caress, no one can

lmao

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 00:42

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

Sweet_Joke_Nectar posted:

and you shall know me by my respirator

good ramen choice Gas Mask

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 05:50

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

the hydroxychloroquine hype cycle was mostly news driven but this round of the ivermectin frenzy mostly seems to correlate with a rise in cases, i.e. people are trying to find it because people they know are getting severe COVID.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 18:56

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

memes are public property

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 19:00

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

very cool that the gulf states are about to have a strong hurricane to deal with as well as their ongoing covid disaster.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2021 23:10

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 12:29

Notorious R.I.M.: Jan 27, 2004; up to my ass in alligators

only real hope for ida is that the center slams into some unpopulated wildlife refuge area instead of a city center. anything else and gl hospitals

# ¿ Aug 28, 2021 01:16

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