r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

quote:

She said "I will never jeopardize the beans."

I think about this phrase too often.

# ¿ Oct 20, 2021 14:05

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# ¿ May 16, 2024 00:59

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

buford and markita

# ¿ Oct 20, 2021 14:18

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA for refusing to eat traditional British food cooked by my British step-mother in law because it's gross to me?

quote:

For context I, Indian-American (28F) who grew up vegetarian, was introduced to meat by my Italian-American husband Massimo (31M)(fake name). So I became a meat eater 3 years ago.

I started out by eating his mom's home cooked food, which is really good. I only eat chicken, fish and bacon, and have grown quite fond of the texture and taste of chicken and bacon.

My husband's biological father Arthur (49M) is British and lives with his family in the UK. After my husband reconnected with his bio dad, his dad booked tickets for us to visit him in the UK.

The first day we were invited to join them for breakfast at their family home, and his dad's wife had prepared all kinds of traditional delicacies for us.

Although the food was bland, I powered through most of them because I genuinely appreciated her hard work and didn't want her to feel bad. However, when it was time for us to try their family favorite, I absolutely noped out of it. I did not want to eat black pudding. I know one of the ingredients is blood, and I definitely did not want to eat blood. I refused to. It's just gross to me.

My step MIL tried really hard to convince me to at least try it, as it was apparently a 100 year old family recipe passed down through generations. When I didn't budge, my step MIL got really offended and accused me of being xenophobic.

AITA?

Classic.

# ¿ Oct 20, 2021 23:08

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Chef Boyardeez Nuts posted:

My wife and I both have professions tied to our name so we solved the kids name by jamming our last names together. We were lucky in that the first four letters of my name and the last five letters of her name worked out to a roughly normal looking/sounding last name.

There's no rules you can name a kid what ever you want.

Regrettably for a lot of children, this is true.

Woodchip posted:

My (25M) mom wants my wife (25F) to use my last name for her PhD

tell your mom to gently caress off. who even cares.

# ¿ Oct 21, 2021 18:36

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

This is a rare case of it would've been better if it'd been posted to reddit, so the commenters could give op a swift wake-up call.

Dazerbeams posted:

How hard do you have to be gripping a child's neck to leave bruises? The OP should be ghosting her mom, not the other way around.

It's actually infuriating. I don't want to victim blame here but op acknowledges her mother is a narc and won't change. This isn't just someone who keeps putting their hand on a hot stove and getting burned--now she's making her kids do it too.

# ¿ Oct 21, 2021 20:52

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

DemoneeHo posted:

The aspect of this technically being a workplace dispute tends to get glossed over, compared to the plagiarism and the petty shittalking.

Like, if this was a just a conflict between friends that would be one thing. But one person stole the literal words from a coworker (who is in a lower position than you) without crediting them, and then rallied the rest of their elite writer group to bat for her. Thats huge imbalace in power and sin compared to the person being cringe online and demanding acknowledgement. Especially when the artistic director of the organization says he wants to "exact revenge on this pestilence of a person," and another person would ice out Dawn, presumably leading to her resignation.

Yep. Dawn was professionally and socially punished for the crime of being cringe online, in a private facebook group that Sonya didn't have to join anyway.

The whole thing honestly feels like Sonya was insecure about Dawn's altruism (that line she sent about "What does Dawn expect us to do? DONATE OUR ORGANS?" yeah dummy that's exactly what she's hoping to inspire you soulless ghouls to do) and decided to tear Dawn down in order to make herself feel better. Dawn might've been annoying, but at the end of the day, she donated an organ that extended a stranger's life and went on to inspire a few others to do the same. All Sonya did was publish a mediocre short story.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

The fact that writers are mostly deranged egotists who will air every unflattering thought they ever had about you for clout can kinda be taken as read by anyone who's ever been to a writer's group or, like, paid attention to a novel.

this is also true

# ¿ Oct 22, 2021 20:09

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Woodchip posted:

I (34M) got a new haircut and now my (36F) wife hasn't spoke to me in 24 hours

wasn't there a user on here that went by the name of baby mullet?

# ¿ Oct 22, 2021 21:58

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

My (28M) ex-wife (30F) can't stand how close our kids (6F, 3M) are with my boyfriend (25M)

quote:

(sorry this is so long and rambly, just don't know what to do and there are a million thought running through my head. TLDR at bottom)

Me (28M) and my ex (30F) wife have two kids together, we separated shortly after she became pregnant with our second and continued living together until she gave birth. We had already discussed that after the birth of our son we would get divorced, and we did.

Three years later, our son is now 3 and our daughter now 6. My wife has remarried and moved a few hours away, meaning I now have primary custody of our kids.

I�m bi (part of the reason we separated), and my current partner is a guy (25M). We�ve been dating for almost two years and three months into our relationship he met my little ones. he grew up with younger sisters so I guessed he would be good with kids but holy hell is he goods with kids. He�s been able to even help calm them down and convince them to eat or clean up their toys and stuff when I can�t. He moved in with me about four months ago bc of issues with his old roommate.

My kids love him, he picks them up from school and takes them out when I�m working. He�s not �dad� but they really like him.

My ex came back to visit for a few weeks. She planned to take the kids out places, get stuff to eat, buy some toys and clothes with them and stuff. I cleared up our guest room for her and everything was fine until my bf came home, she knew I was dating him, fine with that, knew he was living here, less fine with that but didn�t bring it up. But she really didn�t like when our daughter ran up to him to greet him and ask about his day. He picked her up and started talking and laughing with her. And my ex looked super pissed.

I helped her bring her bags to the room and she locked the door, wanting to talk to me in private. She told me she didn�t like how close he was with the kids and that she wants me to tell him to step back, no more picking them up or buying them treats and stuff.

I told her no way, one he�s not doing anything wrong and two thanks to the hours of his job he�s around most of the day, and paying for other childcare would be way too expensive.

She started yelling that they are her kids too and she should get a say in who is around them. Despite the door being closed, she was loud enough that I caused our son to start crying. We rushed into the front room. My boyfriend had picked up our son and was bouncing him and calming him, he gave me a worried look as if to ask if everything ok.

My ex tried to grab our son yelling at my bf that he�s not their parents so he shouldn�t act like one with them. I told her to leave, go for a walk or something and calm down, she refused to leave without the kids so I just told her to go unpack.

I apologised to my bf, I had no idea she would react like that. We all went out for dinner that night (planned to welcome my ex) and the atmosphere was awful. When my kids got the menu they turned to my bf to help them read/order. He did and it was clear my ex didn�t like it. When our daughter couldn�t decide he helped her only for my ex to but in and suggest a different meal after she had decided. At one point my bf went to the bathroom, as soon as he was gone my ex made the kids move so he couldn�t sit next to them.

The breaking point was when my bf ordered a drink and she made a comment about not wanting an alcoholic around her kids. (Alcoholism is a sore spot for my bf) he excused himself, said bye to the kids and told me to stay with the kids, he was going home.

My bf didn�t go home, he called up one of his sisters and went round there for the night. I put the kids to bed and pulled my ex aside, telling her she needs to go, she can take the kids out tomorrow or something but she will not be spending another night in my house. She breaks down and tells me how things aren�t going well with her husband, she wants a kid but he�s doesn�t want to have one biologically.

These arguments have led to a dip in their sex life (I didn�t really need to know that) and she just feels like she�s being punished. She then says she had started to miss me and thought she could drive away my �new side piece� (yes, she called my long term bf a side piece) but then she saw how well he had become part of my family, she got really sad and mad again. Not once did she apologise, just trying to justify her actions.

I told her that she knew his stance on kids when they got married, that she was the one that divorced me for a bs reason, that she�s the one that�s in the wrong here and that she�s lucky I�m giving her tomorrow and not throwing her out right now.

So she�s now left, reluctantly and I went to pick up my boyfriend from his very protective and now pissed off sister. When I got home my phone started blowing up with calls and texts from my ex�s family, saying what I did was cruel and I shouldn�t punish the kids for �my bf�s and my ex�s husband�s action�. At that point, I just shut off my phone. I have no idea what to do anymore. I�m now worried about what my ex is gonna do and say when she has the kids. What the hell do I do?

(TLDR my ex-wife came to visit and can't stand how much our kids love my boyfriend, she yells, demands I make him stop bonding with them and almost injures our son getting him away from bf. we went out to dinner and she kept up this poo poo to the point where my bf left. told her to leave the next day and now I'm worried what will happen when she has the kids. also want to make up for this whole mess to my bf but don't know how)

# ¿ Oct 22, 2021 22:18

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA for confiscating my daughter's fanfiction?

quote:

My daughter is thirteen, and very introverted. I love her, and she's the funniest, smartest person I know, but she doesn't have very good social skills. She has severe anxiety and has struggled with clinical depression since she was nine. She's my only child, FYI.

Our family's moving between states at the moment and currently staying at a friends' house for a month. This whole summer, she's been very distracted by her phone. She's always been an avid reader, and when we asked what she was doing all the time she said she was just reading stories online. We assumed it was e-books or something.

We noticed she went over the data limit for the month, so her father asked for her phone and the password. She said no to giving us the password, but agreed to turn the phone off for the rest of the month to avoid going over more. We were understandably concerned, she's normally very complacent, respectful, and not at all defensive about her phone. So we threatened to take it away entirely unless she told us. She did, after a screaming, sobbing poo poo-fit, the likes of which I haven't seen since she was a toddler. When we opened it, we found tons of extremely explicit fanfiction. She's never shown any interest in sex before, and all of this was between two male characters from a TV show we knew she loved (though we didn't know how much). There was fanart too. Not all of it was explicit, some of it just seemed like plain old creative writing, but I went through all of it in front of her. She said she's not using it to get off, she was just curious and found it interesting. I said I was going to start getting into the community too so that I could understand it and she could talk about it with me, but she seemed very opposed to the idea. She begged me not to talk about it more with her father (they have a weird, cold relationship, unfortunately) and I didn't in front of her. But we find this very concerning.

Given what I know about her lack of social skills, I couldn't help but feel this wasn't helping. So I deleted all of what she had saved as well as the pictures. I don't care that it was gay in nature, I've been pretty sure since she was six that she's lesbian. But this can't be normal or healthy. I took her phone for a week, removed the password, and when we see her reading things now we always ask her specifically to tell us what it is. She seems to have stopped, I'm not going to check her browsing history.

I told some of my girlfriends about it and they said I was being controlling and insensitive, and that telling them about it was humiliating for her. She doesn't know I told them, so it can't be humiliating, and I just want what's best for her. I can't imagine this is.

Am I the rear end in a top hat?

Edit: I do want to say that none of what I saw was disturbing, per se. No, like, BDSM/rape/super kinky kinda stuff. Very vanilla (very explicit, don't get me wrong, but vanilla) for the most part (one threesome, I think). The gayness is a pretty weird, I guess, but that's not why I took it away. I just think it's all kinda gross and distracting for an awkward thirteen-year-old that needs to focus on herself.

Edit pt.2: I just want to clarify: I don't think being gay is weird or bad, as I stated above. I just thought it was a little odd for a probably-lesbian girl to be so into male-on-male sex.

Edit pt. 3: After reading the comments, it's clear that I've hosed this up horrendously. I'm not going to blame anyone else but me for this. I have always tried to make an environment for my daughter where she's aware of sex and safety and comfortable talking to me, but I've just shot myself in the foot. I never meant for her to run in the other direction, and that's what I've done. I should have respected her right to privacy more than I did. Some of you pointed out that this is similar to Harlequin romance novels, which I hadn't considered and which makes this much clearer to me. To clarify, if she came out to me I would, of course, be supportive. If she ends up being straight I'll obviously respect that. It's just always been my motherly instinct that she might like girls, which I never meant in a creepy way. I also didn't realize there's a community there that she may have become attached to, and I don't want to ruin whatever social interactions she has. I feel loving awful. She's my entire world and I didn't mean to handle this so, so wrong. I'll talk to her tomorrow face-to-face and try to repair whatever I can. I never should have told her father, I'll own that, I just thought he should know as her other parent. I definitely never should have told my friends, oh my god, I only thought they may have had similar experiences. I'm realizing how much I completely cocked this up. Thank you for giving me the slap in the face I needed.

Edit pt. 4: Last edit, I promise. Just want to clarify:

1) No screaming or over-the-head scolding was involved. I didn't tell her she was gross or strange, just that she'd been spending too much time on it and I was concerned that she wasn't focusing on other things (upcoming school year, talking to our hosts, etc.) I expressed concern that it was stopping her from trying to make friends in real life, and that some of the things she was reading might not be the healthiest in terms of relationship dynamics (consent, etc.) and sexual health (using condoms, etc.). I absolutely concede that I was in the wrong, and that my deletions and helicoptering would make her feel ashamed, but for context, that's what happened there.

2) The two friends I told are my best friends and live in Australia. They've never met my daughter and she is only peripherally aware of their existence at best. I never should have told them, I know that now, but the likelihood of this coming back and humiliating my daughter further is minimal, FYI. Her father took a backseat during this whole thing and hasn't altered his behavior in the slightest. He and my daughter are getting on better right now than she's getting along with me, which makes PERFECT sense because I'm an idiot bitch who massively violated her privacy.

3) If I could go back and not mention my suspicions about her sexuality, I would. They don't affect the outcome, and I would never, ever in a thousand years try to pry into that part of her life (weird line for me, of all people, to draw, I get it, but there it is). My sister was outed by my ultra-religious parents when we were teenagers and it left her with lifelong scars. I never want that to be the case here. I haven't told anybody my thoughts on it, save this sub. It doesn't matter to me how she identifies, she's my daughter and I love her more than anything. The nature of the fanfiction didn't concern me aside from how explicit it was and how much time she was reading. If it was a straight couple I'd have been just as concerned. Would I have been justified? No, but that was the logic at play, as flawed as it was.

4) I meant fandom things, not sexual fanfiction things when I offered to get involved. Like, expos, and such. Not fisting fics. I did not phrase that at all well.

Update: Today I sat her down and we talked this over. I explained why I reacted the way I did (my concerns about safety, education, isolation, etc.) , why that was wrong of me, and why nothing she'd done was wrong. I apologized profusely (her father will do the same later) and promised to respect her privacy more going forward. She was very emotional and explained part of why she had been so into the fanfiction community. She has liked seeing more representation of LGBTQ relationships and talking to other LGBTQ youth. She came out to me (she asked me not to tell her father until she's ready, and of course I won't, lesson learned), and though some trust has been lost I think we are going to be okay with some hard work on my part. She's going to join our local support group for queer youth and I'm fully on board. We've discussed implementing some of the suggestions commenters have given, and we're excited about them! Thank you to everyone who commented and called me on my bullshit, because I desperately needed it. Thank you, thank you, thank you! - An Idiotic, but Grateful Mother

The fandom was Sherlock.

# ¿ Oct 23, 2021 14:28

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Piell posted:

AITA for no longer letting boyfriend eat what I cook after he rated my food infront of my family?

Any good teacher worth their salt knows that criticism is only valuable if it encourages the student, rather than belittle and discourage.

Also at a certain age, you have to learn that unasked for criticism, no matter how 'constructive', is never a good idea.

# ¿ Oct 23, 2021 19:30

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Arsenic Lupin posted:

He may not have much financial liability, but it sure says a lot about whether he's the sort of person you should be making financial decisions with.
AITA for telling my wife she embarrassed me by bringing a meal to my work?

All the replies offer helpful suggestions for which "your mama" joke he should have come back with.

Maybe if he didn't act like a huge lovely baby, his coworkers wouldn't call him one.

quote:

She said at this point I clearly find it easier to blame her than stand up for myself against those childish bullies. I said I didn't appreciate what she said

lol i wonder why

# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 23:10

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Aita for not giving my adopted parents the money they needed I got from my dads parents?

quote:

So I always had a great relationship with my parents. I was adopted at birth and told when I was a toddler. Everything was fine until I turned 16/17. My parents were both in their late thirties and decided it wasn�t �too late� and that with the advance of fertility technology in the years it is possible they could still have a biological baby. I was a bit hurt they wanted a biological child so badly especially after years and years and told them they should foster but they said no, they wanted �another try�. A lot of their word choices hurt me.

I�m now 23. They have been trying for a baby using IVF and other methods to no avail. My mother is now 46. Not trying to be ageist or anything but it can be hard to conceive even with fertility treatment. When my parents, who went from being doting and loving to now contacting me twice a month since I moved out at 21 invited me over for dinner, I was so happy I got ready and everything and drove an hour and a half away. To my surprise the dinner was just an excuse for my parents to ask me if I would carry one of their last embryos for them and that they would help me pay off my student loans. I was so offended and felt like an incubator. They barely speak to me and they only invited me to ask me that ten minutes into it. I left their house in tears. Sadly just a week later my grandfather (dads dad) passed away. After the funeral I told my grandma why I wasn�t talking to my parents at the service since we were always close and she was so shocked at what they asked me. She told me she�d give me the money they promised to my dad from my grandfathers insurance to pay off my loans.

When my parents found out they�ve been texting me begging me to give them just a portion of the money for their treatments and they wouldn�t even need me and they�d hire a surrogate and they were sorry. I said no. They�ve been calling me the biggest rear end in a top hat and saying I�m being greedy. Even some family say I�m being too hard by not giving them anything. I haven�t even gotten the money yet and me and my grandma are being painted out as the major assholes. Are we? I will have money left over I pay my loans they aren�t much. And it�s been �their dream for years� and I�m overreacting by the request.

# ¿ Oct 25, 2021 23:17

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Mx. posted:

My boss cried when I asked for a raise

You can do whatever you want, op. You're free and clear.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2021 14:48

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

small ghost posted:

Love the detail that he's apparently fine with period sex but seeing a clean menstrual cup? Quelle horreur!

I wonder if it's to do with the size of the cup. We had a winner posted in the last thread who was intimidated by how large the cup was.

# ¿ Oct 26, 2021 15:18

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Kuros posted:

Guess the pet!

AITA For firing my house sitter

OP said

# ¿ Oct 26, 2021 16:02

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

My Girlfriend wants to call Off our wedding After an Argument with My mother

quote:

My Girlfriend and I (25f & 27m) have been dating for the past 7 years, we met in middle school but did not start dating until we where both in college, like in most relationship there�s some ups and down, but nothing has even came close to us wanting to take a break, we have a very happy and stable relationship.

We got engaged at the end of 2019 and due to the current state of the world we had to push back the wedding several times, regardless of that, we finally had a date that was set, we�ve been working the past few months to get everything ready for the wedding,

During the planning process my fianc� and my mom had a bunch of disagreement, they are both very passionate about things like who they want at the wedding, what they want the wedding to look like, what venue, what location, where to honeymoon etc, it�s a special occasions for them both so I did my best to stay out of it, unless it was absolutely necessary for me to get involved and when I did I tried to be impartial.

The main issue came when it was time to figure an invitation lists, I come from a large family and so there�s a bunch of family and friends I would want at my wedding, my Girlfriend on the other hand only has a few family members and friends that she wanted to invite who she knew would be there for sure, because of that the invitation seemed a little one sided, I had a lot more people supporting me and being there for me than she did, and my mom not wanting my wife to feel unsupported decided to reach out to some of her extended family and other family members some of which she hadn�t been in contact with in years to let them know about the wedding and see if they wanted to come out and support her.

It was supposed to be nice gesture however when my Girlfriend found out she was livid and said some not so kind things to my mother, when she came to me letting me know what happened, based on what I knew I told her that my mother had no bad intentions and that she was over reacting, she flipped out on me and left, she called me about a day later telling me that she�s wanted to stop the wedding all together and was reconsidering our relationship, she told me I was taking my moms side over her and was disregarding her feelings, Now my fianc� sometimes has a problem with acting out of emotions and not taking times to think things through so I decided to give her more time and when she came to a little bit later and basically confirmed she wanted to stop the wedding, I was very confused, I tried to talk some sense into her but she was being stubborn and persistent.

I love her and she loves me, so I am very confused as to why she was willing To end the relationship after just one argument especially since I wasn�t even the one she argued with, she could have talked to me and we would have worked things out but she refuses to do so, now I want to keep being with her but I�m so lost on what to do and how to even approach her in this situation.

quote:

My girlfriend and I are paying for majority of it but my mother did contribute but we could have done without it

She loves weddings and wanted to help plan our wedding like she helped planned for my sister

quote:

My mom wanted to honeymoon at a location but didn�t get a chance to and so she wanted us to honeymoon there, I honestly didn�t think my GF would care where we honeymooned as long as it wasn�t awful,

I do value and respect my gf, I wasn�t trying to let my mom make decisions for me, but she was just way more invested in things like what brand napkins we used while I didn�t care that much so I let my mom and Gf handle it.

quote:

I�m willing to do my part and fight for our relationship while she isn�t, yes my mother might have over stepped a little bit but ultimately it�s mine and hers relationship and I think it�s unfair for her to end things because of someone else�s actions.

quote:

I feel like I have a healthy relationship with my mother but I will definitely be looking into couples therapy for my Gf and I

# ¿ Oct 26, 2021 21:59

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Megillah Gorilla posted:

Every. loving. Time.

My unemployed ~~leech~~ boyfriend who plays computer games all day does nothing around the house we used my money to rent and furnish. Now he's upset when I come home from being on my feet 8 - 10 hours a day and expect him to do half an hour of light work around the house.

AITA?

DIPAC.

The comments on that one were depressing. OP kept reiterating that she wasn't going to dump him over a "pile of dishes". No matter how many times people pointed out that it wasn't about the dishes, she never listened. Well, she'll figure it out. Hopefully before she has a kid with him...

# ¿ Oct 27, 2021 14:43

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

You don't understand, it's her special super princess magic day!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

# ¿ Oct 27, 2021 16:15

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Hughlander posted:

AITA for "throwing" my career in my in-laws face?

To be honest, I understand why he didn't tell them, as we both have somewhat strained relationships with our overbearing and manipulative parents. He said that his father has expressed feelings of nationalism before but could not have imagined how violently he would've reacted, and I believe him because I know they barely talk. He also said he would have told them I was chinese if they asked, they just never did.

Uh huh.

Funktastic posted:

AITA My husband wants to take our young children for a month long visit with his family without me

I read this over twice and I can't figure out why they can't just put the kids in daycare? Like... is there a long waitlist? Or is the husband just being an idiot?

# ¿ Oct 30, 2021 01:13

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my SIL I'm glad she's infertile because she'd be a terrible mother?

"How dare you spend money on your pets when you should be spending it on my children instead!" The entitlement is astounding.

She doesn't even need the money! She says in the comments that she and her husband are well-off!

Anyway here's a wholesome one.

AITA for yelling at my sister because she called me handsome.

quote:

I (16M) hate being called handsome, mom used to do it a lot but she stopped doing it when she realized it made me upset/sad idk it fucks up my mood but my sister (18F) picked up on it and she calls me handsome a lot. It is really annoying. It pisses me off and upsets me. I have asked her to stop but she thinks it is funny that I get triggered over something so small. She keeps on doing it and it is not fun at all.

I was in a pretty bad mood already when she started to call me handsome and annoy me. I called a cruel B word and stormed off. Mom says I shouldn't have escalated and it is silly to be so stuck up over a small word. I really can't explain why I feel bad about it so I feel like I am being sensitive and behaving like an idiot. My sister is happy that I got scolded. Dad think I should not raise to her bait and just keep my chin up and ignore her but I really hate it when she does it. I feel like a total poo poo head right now.

Update

quote:

People called me an rear end in a top hat but a lot of people were really helpful. I have started therapy. It has helped me a lot. Some people peppered me with feminine and masculine compliments. I hated all the masculine ones. I have since then been thinking about my gender a lot. I spend a lot of time talking about it with my therapist. She is great.

Anyway, I told my parents and they have started to buy me different clothes. I am growing out my hair. These things feel really comfortable. we will see what happens but I feel happier with my new clothes. My sister realized that I was going through a 'gender crisis' we hugged it out and she apologized. I have become an victim of her experiments with fashion. lol. She is great. I am in really great place right now just wish my voice would stop becoming more manly. haha.

# ¿ Nov 2, 2021 23:29

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Don't forget the physical assault!

quote:

I have a semi permanent tooth bridge. I�ve never told him because that�s private. We were in his car and he reached out to my face and before I knew, he was trying to yank it off.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2021 17:00

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA For Destroying My Wife�s Dad in One on One Basketball?

quote:

My wife�s Dad is one of those �Back In My Day� kind of guys, and has shown me his high school and adult rec league (seriously) athletic trophies on multiple occasions. I mean, he�s insanely proud of his athletic accomplishments although the most recent one happened 20 years ago.

Well, this past weekend, a few of us were sitting around talking about sports and he proceeds to tell us that he could�ve been a professional basketball player or�swimmer. Two very different sports, but whatever. After we all laughed at him, for some reason, he decided to direct his ire at me and tell me that he�d have kicked my rear end if we were in our athletic primes at the same time, and that he might very well beat me today. Usually, I�d brush this off but he made it a point to go at at me in front of family and friends for zero reason. Also, he�s previously introduced me to others as his daughter�s � meager unathletic husband,� and on a separate occasion, he told a men�s group at church that he didn�t want me on his side in a team event because I�m allegedly not a �great communicator� and team sports is all about �communicators� in his words. It�s all super weird and unprovoked.

Well, I was a decent player in my day and still play occasionally, and always figured that I could beat him pretty handily (I�m 24 years younger than him). And on this particular day, I�d had a few beverages in me and was feeling a bit frisky. So I readily accepted his challenge to play a game at the elementary school around the corner, to shut this thing down once and for all.

AITA for beating his rear end 11-0 in front of his mom, wife, kids and grandkids?? I knew after a few points I had him but he�s taunted me for years. I then finished his beer when I got back to the house lol.

Update: So my wife stopped by her parents tonight to pick up mail. Her Dad wasn�t home so she asked my MIL where he was at (he�s usually home since he works remotely). Apparently, he was at the school �getting up shots� and has been there three days this week. My wife drove by him on her way home and he was in a full lather. Not sure if I should laugh or cry. 😅

# ¿ Nov 5, 2021 20:55

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Mx. posted:

AITA for leaving my then-boyfriend in the woods without a lift when he wouldn't slow down enough for me to keep up when hiking?

lol OP rules let the man hike home

quote:

About 30 minutes later I realized I was so far behind that I hadn't seen them in a while and they couldn't hear my yells. They also had the map and I was worried I'd take a wrong turn trying to find them.

lol he was trying to kill her

Sisal Two-Step fucked around with this message at 03:14 on Nov 10, 2021

# ¿ Nov 10, 2021 03:12

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Arsenic Lupin posted:

AITA for telling my fianc� I won�t attend his brother�s wedding not even 3 months before ours ?

Weddings should be banned. You can get married, but you can't have a wedding. So there.

AITA for telling my sister that my fianc�e and I are both offended she didn't put her as one of her bridesmaids?

quote:

My fianc�e of 4 years was best friends with my sister before we got together. They're still very close friends, they're not bffs but are still close. They hang out at least once a week, they go shopping together, they go to the salon together etc.

I also have a brother, who recently got a girlfriend. He's been dating his gf for 8 months. She's a very conventionally attractive woman and she works in a modeling company. Her character though is not as nice. Their relationship with my brother is very toxic, both of them take advantage of and mistreat each other a lot in several ways and also she has insulted my sister and my mother. That has caused a strain in the relationship between my brother and my sister/mom.

Now my sister's wedding is coming up and she picked her bridesmaids. She asked my brother's gf to be a bridesmaid but not my fianc�e, aka her close friend of almost a decade. My fianc�e was very upset by this but chose not to speak because she didn't want to stick her nose in the bride's business and as hurt as she was, bride's day bride's way as she said. Out of respect for her I never told anything to my sister either.

The next time we all met, my fianc�e was visibly upset and uncomfortable, trying to put an act that she was unbothered. After that, my sister called me and asked what's wrong with my fianc�e. I just said she's been feeling a bit down lately, she'll be fine. She kept pressuring me and asked me if it's about her being excluded as a bridesmaid. I was honest and said yes, and I'm also offended. She asked why. I said that it's pretty self explanatory since she excluded her close friend of 7-8 years to put my brother's gf instead when she's treated our family like poo poo. She said not asking my fianc�e is nothing personal, it was more of an aesthetic choice because my brothers gf has an old money vibe while my fianc�e looks "cheap" no matter what she does. I said her reasoning made things even worse and she should be ashamed but she called me and my fianc�e ta for feeling offended for her wedding choices. AITA???

# ¿ Nov 10, 2021 03:19

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Mx. posted:

AITA for lashing out at my husband for suggesting I stop buying formula instead of cancelling his streaming services to save money?

quote:
I'm (f32) the breadwinner and have a toddler and a 9 month old baby.

Op forgot her third, 444 month old toddler.

Evil Willow posted:

BORING!!! Stupid mods.

Jesus AITA mods are the worst, most boring dweebs on the biggest, dweebiest website on the planet.

Mx. posted:

AITA for letting my cat sit in the roasting pan

NTA trying to keep cats out of box-like vessels is like trying to fight the entropy of the universe.

# ¿ Nov 12, 2021 14:44

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for telling my fiancee I am not willing to lie about how we met to her family and friends?
Envy envy envy envy meeeee

This is ugly.

# ¿ Nov 12, 2021 14:53

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

PancakeTransmission posted:

quote:
She said she wants her friends and family to think she is pretty and be jealous of her
Nah it's fine man, I can see a happy future for you both

I kept thinking about this post all day and you know what occurred to me? Unless her friends are as insecure and immature as she is, I bet they wouldn't care. I bet she already has a reputation as a liar in their group anyway. She's torching a good relationship for a reaction she won't get from people who don't care and it wouldn't make her happy anyway.

# ¿ Nov 12, 2021 23:43

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Hughlander posted:

AITA for getting mad because my gf let her brother stay in our apartment without permission?

She made it quite clear she's not your gf any more dude...

quote:

Edit: I want to make it clear that I didn't immediately try to throw out the brother when he turned 18. I spoke to both of them multiple times explaining the situation, but was ignored. I tried talking about it for half a month before doing this as a last resort.

Edit 2: After some consideration I've decided that finding my own place and living arrangements will be for the better. Clearly my girlfriend refuses to place any responsibility on her brother, so he'll be there for who knows how long. I'll wait for her to unblock me and get in contact to have a serious discussion about our relationship, and hopefully we'll both apologize for losing our cool and move on. If not, well there are plenty of fish in the sea.

i wonder if this guy's ever gonna clue in

# ¿ Nov 13, 2021 21:41

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

I waited three hundred and thirty six hours!!!

# ¿ Nov 13, 2021 22:37

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Evil Willow posted:

I (22m) was worried GF (22f) was cheating so I hid in her coat closet while she was having girls night at her apartment. Her friend found me obviously humiliating me and girlfriend. Is there any way to recover from this?

quote:

I feel Like I deserve some credit because I came clean when I was discovered and didn�t try to lie about what my intentions were

some lies he could have told to get out of this one:
- he was sleep walking
- he's from the future and is trying to avoid running into his past self
- he's the ghost of her boyfriend, who died
- he's planning a surprise party for her, in the closet
- he moved in months ago and she never even noticed so whats the big deal
- OR

quote:

I am a normal person going through a really bad crisis

# ¿ Nov 14, 2021 19:26

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Evil Willow posted:

AITA for telling my baby's mother she only breastfeeds to keep me from having visitation

Oh hey I remember this guy.

AITA for calling my baby's mother petty for not letting me be in the delivery room?

same op posted:

rear end in a top hat

My ex and I were engaged but broke it off early into her pregnancy. We had a lot of issues, but our breakup was precipitated by her catching me sexting people behind her back and a couple of flings. Overall, we have kept it amicable through her pregnancy but I definitely wouldn't call us friends.

I called to check on her since she is due within the next month and asked what the plan for delivery was. I guess I assumed I would be in the room when the baby is being born. She told me due to COVID precautions she is only allowed one person with her while she is in the hospital and she's going to have her best friend with her-that I could meet the baby once she gets home. I got angry and told her it was petty and vindictive to not allow me in the room to witness our child's birth. She snapped back and told me she needs someone who brings her comfort and she can be vulnerable with and that's not me. AITA for calling her petty in this situation?

Edit to add: Since these have been questioned in the comments -I cheated on her. Yes some of it was before she was pregnant, she broke it off cause she caught me sexting when we were laying in bed one night and then found all the other stuff -We ended on the note we would try to be friends for the baby. We were going to try to go to counseling and see if we could fix things and work it out for the baby but then she caught me in a lie (not cheating again but related to lying trying to minimize her hurt due to what I'd done) and she cut me off completely other than giving me updates after each appointment and inviting me to a 3D ultrasound. It's been entirely her choice to not be friends. -Her best friend hasn't even been around for her pregnancy since she's been traveling for work. She's only coming back now to help with labor and recovery then leaving again. -Last, part of why I feel it's pettiness motivating her choices is cause she is using COVID as a reason to keep my family from meeting the baby. She told me she thinks only my parents should meet her until she gets a bit older, and wants them to wear masks. But she's still working as a nurse getting exposed to COVID DAILY so how is it really that much of a concern to her. I feel like it's about control over the baby.

# ¿ Dec 3, 2021 16:30

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

trickybiscuits posted:

Okay but consider: just serving him papers isn't funny

She posted this at the end of March. The greatest pain she had ever experienced was not seeing her grandchild for four months.

I don't like posting this stuff in the Estranged Parents thread anymore because I'm afraid it will give someone a flashback.

And I like this one because it's such a good insight into how these people think:

Ah yes, children and teenagers, famously known for having no problems, particularly with moving multiple times.

My favourite type of poster on the Estranged Losers forum is definitely the one who isn't even actually estranged.

quote:

Fortunately, my daughter and her husband have set up a page on their phone where they can post pictures/videos of my two grandchildren for various members of their family which includes 4 grandparents, aunts and uncles. I will give them credit for that because that at least allows me to see updated pictures of my two precious ones and I love it. Periodically they will do Facetime with me and my husband which they did on/about Halloween and Thanksgiving. [...]

When we Facetime, she�s very talkative though. [...]

If I send clothes for the kids, I may see them on them�or not. [...]I�ll do as she does which is send a Happy Birthday text later at night, after the day is over.

To recap: the daughter is in frequent communication, posts photos for her to look at, allows safe contact with the grandkids, and sends messages on holidays. But because she's not immediately available at all times, and because she's trying to keep her unvaccinated kids safe (no mention of granny's vax status, I noticed), she's "pulling away". :ok:

# ¿ Dec 3, 2021 16:55

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

idk what I just read but gently caress you for showing it to me

# ¿ Dec 3, 2021 20:28

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

quote:

Cooking together is one of our love languages. It isn�t as special if I make it myself. Also she makes really good homemade biscuits, I was hoping she would cook them for me.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2021 01:17

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA for calling my brother out on his lie about supposedly living in poverty?

quote:

My parents had me (29M) young so growing up we lived in a bad neighborhood. And I mean like drive-bys almost daily, police always poking around, helicopters, never was allowed to play outside. And my parents struggled to make ends meet so sometimes didn�t even get proper meals. My dad got a better high paying job when I was around 7-8 and we moved to a wayyy nicer neighborhood. And everything was different. By the time my brother was born (21M), we had a house with our own rooms in a more suburban area, got to go to private school, got a nanny and everything. Basically was a different life style from the one I had at first. My parents got me into therapy for some stuff I saw as a kid. Still suffer from ptsd but not as severe from when I was a teen

They were never ashamed to tell him about the kind of life we had before and I used to share stories about crazy stuff that happened to me when we got older. He�s been going out with his girlfriend for almost 2 years but we don�t see her that often. She came over last weekend for brunch and we were all just chatting.

Conversation got to where I went to school as a kid and she said something like �oh yeah Devin told me how bad it got at that school� and I was thinking what? Devin never went there. Then she was confused. Obviously my brother was nervous. My dad asked some more stuff like what else did he tell her. As it turns out almost all the stuff I talked about to him that happened to me, he lied to her and said it happened to him. And I called him out right there. First of all I was mad for him making up such pointless lies but also for thinking it�s okay to use MY traumas for himself. I don�t even get why. It�s not �cool� to have experienced the things I have. Devin was super red, that I could tell. My dad was kind of scolding him too. His girlfriend looked really uncomfortable and like she couldn�t believe why he�d tell her all that, that she actually cried for him when he told her about his �lovely childhood.� We were all pretty mad. So that whole thing ended quickly.

My brother hasn�t stopped saying poo poo. Dad and I are on the same page but my mom really thinks I was an rear end in a top hat because it was not the time and place to have that discussion. My brother says it was a bunch of harmless lies that I didn�t need to point out at the moment since now his girlfriend isn�t happy with him. Yeah he lied I know but was I an rear end in a top hat for pointing it out when I did? Was just so mad it really didn�t occur to me if it was the right moment to say something.

Give me your trauma.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2021 01:52

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

Bibliotechno Music posted:

That�s the whole reason the other thread was created in the first place. And may I suggest that if you enjoy those posts you go to the thread for them, rather than reading them here in the thread specifically for other things?

Do you even go to the other thread? It's mostly goons sharing their own experiences and supporting each other. This is a thread for mocking internet train wrecks and EP posts fit the vibe here better than what the other thread has become.

trickybiscuits posted:

I will do this. I don't want to bring this poo poo into the estranged parents therad because it's morphed into things like this:

And that is good an heartwarming and I don't want to gently caress with it.

This is a reasonable compromise imo.

# ¿ Dec 4, 2021 19:54

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

value-brand cereal posted:

AITA for not carrying on a tradition my family started with my stepfamily?

LISA! You're tearing this family tradition that was started only 1 generation ago apart!

NINE CHILDREN???

# ¿ Dec 13, 2021 20:44

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AITA for not choosing to spend my birthday with my kids???

quote:

I(37) am a mom of 4 kids. 2 girls(19 and 14), and 2 boys(16 and 12). My 19 year old daughter and I got into an argument about a week and a half ago over my birthday and now none of my kids will speak to me.

My birthday was on a Friday, and I had planned to spend the entire weekend with my boyfriend because he wanted to treat me since it would be my first birthday that we were together. I didn't hear at all from any of my kids besides the causal text the whole week and I assumed they probably weren't planning on seeing me or had forgotten. My 19 year old was usually the one to plan my birthdays after I divorced their dad 2 years ago, but I didn't hear from her so I made my plans and stuck with them.

On Friday I still didn't get a single happy birthday text from my kids(this made me a little sad) but again I just assumed that teenagers will be teenagers and they were busy(they told me they were staying at their dad's this weekend). My bf picked me up from work and drove me home so I could change into something nicer because we had plans to go out to dinner.

When we got to my apartment and walked in the door the lights suddenly turned on and my kids jumped out and yelled: SURPRISE! Turns out they hadn't forgotten and all 4 of my kids were there and they had decorated my apartment with all types of balloons and decorations. I was so happy that they hadn't forgotten and my 19 year old gave me a big hug and said she was sorry they made me think they had forgot.

I gave them all big hugs and kisses for being so sweet to me, but when I told them about my bf and I's dinner plans my kids were upset that I wasn't staying. I apologized and told them that I had made plans because I didn't think we were doing anything together. My 19 year old requested to move the party to the next night, but I told them I couldn't because I had plans for the entire weekend with my bf.

They then asked if they could at least go to dinner with us and I told them no on account that my bf does not like children and him and my 19 year old do not get along so this would be very awkward. At this point my 19 year old got very upset and started to argue with my bf for "stealing me away" on my birthday and also at me "for not even wanting to spend time with them."

I tried to tell them that it was my birthday and I was allowed to spend it how I wanted, and I got to spend it with them every year and that this year was special. My 19 year old again started to yell and by then my bf stepped in and told her to stop acting like a brat and then all of my kids started yelling at us.

We ended up leaving and going to dinner, and I did spend the weekend with him, but my kids are very mad at this and are now staying exclusively with their dad for the time being.

Was it so wrong to want to spend my birthday how I wanted to?

Edit: You all do not understand how the dynamic between my children works. My 19 year old is like their "ring-leader" and they follow what she says. She did not like my bf from the beginning before he ever could have done anything to warrant her dislike of him. She pulled mean pranks on him at the beginning by convincing all of her siblings to call my bf "Fat Matt" behind his back. Of course when he found out about this he was upset and felt incredibly disrespected.

Edit: my bf is 31 since y'all want to know. He does respect that I have kids. He just does not want children, and I am done having kids so that's why it isn't a problem for us.

Edit: okay I get that you all have made up your mind on me, and that's fine because I did post on here, but please know that you all do not know everything, only a little part of my life. When I posted this is asked if I was TA because I didn't choose to stay with them, but many if you have started to attack me for my dating life and I think that is unfair. I would never let someone dangerous around my children.

I was in contact with my kids the week before my birthday, but they never asked or inquired about my birthday plans. I realized a little later I should have told them I was going to be gone that weekend, but I thought it would be fine because they were spending the week with their dad. They all have keys to my place and they are never there alone for more than a day, or so, plus my 16 and 19 yo are usually there with their younger siblings.

I should have never posted on here. At the end of the day it is always on the mother to be the angel and always make perfect decisions. My ex-husband isn't a saint either. He didn't contact me about my kids or if they were going to spend time with me for my birthday.

Thank you all for your wonderful insight on my parenting. Please stop messaging me to call me names.

Estranged parent walkin'.

# ¿ Dec 14, 2021 21:27

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

orange cats are dumb. it's their most endearing feature.

# ¿ Dec 14, 2021 22:14

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ May 16, 2024 00:59

Sisal Two-Step: May 29, 2006; mom without jaw
dad without wife

i'm taking all the Ls now, sorry

AnoHito posted:

holy poo poo the edit makes it so much worse...

quote:
The reasons she decided to be childfree is she claims she's asexual, she just doesn't want one, she has emotional baggage and feels unable to care for a real child, she fears pregnancy, and she has a carrier gene like me and "doesn't want to go through what I did" (I had 4 miscarriages and a highly defect child that died after 3 months due to the gene). Yes there has been slight tension between us because I think she just hasn't found the right man (she never dated growing up) and her other fears are unnecessarily exaggerated, but it's ultimately her decision and I don't resent her.

e: AITA for yelling at my wife for potentially endangering our kids?

quote:

Yesterday a little girl (7) with heavy special needs ran away from her school and ended up in my backyard. My wife is a SAHM to our 3 kids (6f, 3f, 6mo m) and was home with our younger 2 and she eventually saw the little girl in our backyard. It was pouring and the wind was very strong so she went outside to bring the girl inside with our kids even though she didn't know who the girl was. She eventually got the girl to come inside, dried her off, gave her one of my oldest daughter's outfits, made her a snack, then set her up with a movie on my daughter's iPad before calling the police.

After the police picked up the girl, she called me to tell me what happened and I was furious because she let someone we don't know into our house with our young kids. She tried to excuse it by saying it was 40 degrees and pouring with wind up to 50 miles an hour and she didn't want the girl to get sick.

I told her she could've put her on the screened in porch if she wanted the girl to be away from the rain but she argued that the girl was drenched and freezing so she felt like she had to get her into some warm clothes. Then she said that she didn't want the girl to try to run away again while she called the police and waited for the police to get there, so she gave her a banana and played frozen to distract her.

I asked what she would've done if the girl that she brought into our house had hurt our kids and she yelled at me that our kids were napping and didn't even know that there was someone in the house. She then yelled at me for being "cold-hearted and cruel" towards a 7 year old. She slept in the guest room last night and is in there tonight and she won't speak to me so I wanted to know if I was the rear end in a top hat.

I don't think I did anything wrong but my friend said I was being a dick because it was a 7 year old girl so I wanted to know if I was the rear end in a top hat.

Sisal Two-Step fucked around with this message at 15:02 on Dec 15, 2021

# ¿ Dec 15, 2021 15:00

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

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