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Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Trollologist posted:

Papa Shango was and is my favorite wrestler of all time. He made the ultimate warrior ooze a black goo and one time magically set a guy's hand on fire instead of, you know, wrestling him.

I’m so glad they decided to retire that horribly racist witch doctor gimmick of his. So stereotypical and degrading. So what did he do after that?

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Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

wesleywillis posted:

I'm sure its :thejoke: but he suddenly became very westernized and decided that he wanted to drown himself with trim. And also make that trim available to others.

Finding a more racist gimmick was a proud moment for Creative I’m sure. What I had forgotten was them making Tony Atlas a loving Zulu and him being in the ‘91 Royal Rumble.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

A spelling bee?

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Ok quiz bowl. Sweet.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

One weak tag match in 40 minutes. One champion who can’t cut a promo.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Dr Death Steve Williams is a name I’ve heard dozens of times on Jim Cornette podcasts but I have no idea who he is.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Wrestlicious, baby!

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Put on Smackdown for the hell of it and it opened with some dude in a suit carrying cardboard cutouts to the ring so I went back to watching Diners, Drive-ins and Dives.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Trollologist posted:

Look, I'm not mad at the heel character Jim Cornette because in 1995 he interfered in a match and cost the bucktooth boys from winning the podunk tag titles at the dumpelton county fair.

I'm mad at Jim Cornette the person for inspiring a generation of wrestling fans that wrestling needs to keep being a scam to be successful. And that some people that look up to him are still carrying around those ideas in Indy feds and the industry writ large in all kinds of capacities to champion those ideals.


I'm sorry to snipe a page with this drek.
:69snypa:

Keep your outlaw mud show bullshit in the school cafeteria where it belongs.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

he's already a mark, brother

Gimmick Battle Royal.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

brock is the most unbelievable babyface ever and it owns lmao

When did he become a cowboy?

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

shadow puppet of a posted:

Sorry guys my cat who is also named Scott Hall died last week of a bladder infection and it really upsets me to see nobody mourned my Scott Hall last week but these week its all Scott Hall Wall to Wall concern this grief that and please show some decorum in this trying time of Scott Hall's near passing from his many ailments and I'm just like SCOTT HALL DIED LAST WEEK IN MY ARMS you POS, but nobody wants to listen they just want to pre-lament the passing of non-cat Scott Hall. You can imagine how that would get to me. So please, starting 51 weeks from now PLEASE do not mention Sc*tt H*ll either the cat or the non-cat incarnation for a solid fortnight so we can protect each others cherished connection to Scotts alike on the anniversary of his likely passing.

Is Rick Bognar okay?

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

JonathonSpectre posted:

Cue 9 year-oldish JS sitting down at the counter at his grandparents' restaurant for afterschool grilled chee and opening up the local newspaper to a story about how...

...wait, what the gently caress, this is impossible, it can't be...

Hacksaw Jim Duggan and the Iron Sheik got arrested for driving around smoking weed together? But Hacksaw is an all-American, and the loving Sheik, well we all know what an Ayatollah-loving piece of poo poo he is? What were they doing together?

I was legit in confused anguish until it started slowly dawning on me that everyone was right about wrestling.

If the Iron Sheik had stayed a bodyguard the Pahlavi Dynasty would still hold the Persian throne.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

XFL: He Hate Me and no fair catch so punt returners get blown the gently caress up.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Corny speaks ill of the 80s WWF cartoon wrestling that I love, but then he rails against Wendy’s terrible French fries and I forgive him.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Infidel Castro posted:

Meet me at Camp Khitomer in 15 minutes if you want an rear end kicking.

Christopher Plummer will be shouting Shakespeare quotes at you the entire time.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Trollologist posted:

I love this info so much.

It's super interesting that there's maybe 20+ writers working for WWE at any given time and who knows how many over the years, but there's maybe 3 or 4 known writers that anyone can name.
And even then, one of them is so hated, just the idea of having him on your team causes a fan riot.


No one is doing this poo poo to Alex kurtzman (and they should).

I only know Patrice O’Neil, and that’s because he bombed terribly and joked about it on Opie and Anthony.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Animal-Mother posted:

Iron Sheikh tasked with securing peace in the Middle East, undoubtedly does better than Kushner.

He’s gently caress Netanyahu’s rear end, make him humble.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Spuckuk posted:

seconding this, its remarkable how wrestling just...died in the UK for the longest time

Televised snooker.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

GolfHole posted:

here's a fun challenge: come up with a decent wrestling gimmick in tyool 2022

Pullin’ the old Nikolai Volkoff (or Nikita Koloff for the WCW nerds) evil Russian gimmick out of storage. And, in the grandest tradition, have him played by a Polish guy from Passaic, New Jersey.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Elephant Ambush posted:

Every celebrity sex tape I've ever seen sucks

Never meet your heroes or watch them gently caress on tape

Tonya Harding put the work in.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

gbs but from 2004 posted:

I bet hulkster was real mad at the black ranger

As long as he doesn’t date Brookie it’s all good brother.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Bonzo posted:

I was a regular listener of both the Howard Stern and Bubba the Love Sponge shows on SirusXM from 06-08. Bubba would have Hogan on for at least an hour a day while he rambled about his divorce from Linda.

IIRC, over the years they basically made it clear and Hogan's reality show was a total farce in how his marriage was portrayed and the show was mainly to promote his daughter's album. Just curious if anyone has more info on that or what. I know Hogan is way up there as far as rank but I'm shocked no one has every brought any of this stuff up when cutting a promo or just in general.

Nobody disrespects the immortal Hulk Hogan, brother.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

I have to go to Hogan’s Hangout. $20 chicken fingers, brother.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

12 mil would have paid for a lot of Warrior comic books.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Wait wait wait. The wild eyed Southern Boys, the dudes coming to the ring in Confederate uniforms carrying a Confederate flag and with the flag on their trunks, they’re the faces? Goddamn WCW.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Saucer Crab posted:

I've got some news for that:

Real heel heat, brother.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

BAW GAWD WWE JUST KILLED ANTONIO INOKI! THEY KILLED HIM!

Giant Baba did it from beyond the grave.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

16-bit Butt-Head posted:

i think about sting a lot

I believe in an alternate reality where he and Ultimate Warrior never broke up and saved the concept of tag team wrestling.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Prof. Crocodile posted:

is this guy a wrestler's wrestler? as in wrestlers like him even though normal people don't, and that's how he keeps getting work? because i remember him being presented as a big star back in the day, despite the fact that fans were visibly disheartened to see him come to the ring.

Bad country music and hitting dudes with a guitar. Seen it done better by one Punk Rock Wayne Farris.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

spaceblancmange posted:

you just know it would have a finish where the ref get the twins mixed up

Olsens and Hebners all over the place!

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Iron Sheik packs his Persian clubs with C4, martyrs himself and takes out Vince and the Saudi Royals in the name of Shia. Vince appears on top of the Kaaba and does the McMahon strut. Greatest work ever.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

WoodrowSkillson posted:

man i loved akeem as a kid lol

I wouldn’t have known he was basically an insult to Dusty Rhodes if I hadn’t read it somewhere.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Bonzo posted:

What's in this for the Saudis? Or they just huge marks?

Whenever you fill up your car in the future, you’re the money mark.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

I can watch 80s NWA shows all day long on YouTube. Everything I didn’t see as a kid because we had Sports Entertainment, apparently.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

The Last Call posted:

Someone at WWE getting fired:



You wanted Hell in a Cell you got it.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

The other best Almost a Jobber: the Italian Stallion.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Giraffes do not like well done steak with ketchup or turkey on wheat sandwiches.

Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

All charges dismissed except for against Steve Keirn for having been a lovely Doink the Clown.

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Szyznyk
Mar 4, 2008

Mulaney Power Move posted:

There's the story of when the Ultimate Warrior presented DESTRUCITY to Vince and company when he returned for WM12:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOv2ewcrFDA

Doesn't really cover Vince's reaction, though

I dream that there is a warehouse full of unsold Warrior comic books somewhere in Stanford, CT.

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