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bulletsponge13 posted:I don't even think anything I've shared is extraordinary. Youre just gonna have to trust us dude. I would pay real money for this in hardcopy. What really hits deep for me is how your work so far combines the artistry of how you paint a scene with uncomfortably honest emotional analysis of what those events do to a person. You are talking about some deeply terrible poo poo in prose that counterweights the events beautifully, and that juxtaposition of the prose vs the events is haunting.
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May 19, 2022 00:45
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| # ? Apr 29, 2024 17:54 |
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Nothing going up tonight; Didn't get what I wanted done. More coming tomorrow.
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May 19, 2022 04:52
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This part here:bulletsponge13 posted:
Feels like it hits the nail on the head. We're not saying you are awesome because we know you and feel like we should be supportive. We're saying you are awesome because we know you and therefore know that you aren't the kind of person who writes this one-handed, spinning it out of thin air. The context matters a hell of a lot. If I knew these stories were coming from that psychopath Navy Seal (was is Gallagher he was called?) then I would absolutely find them revolting because it would mean that the whole right wing war fetish would seep into the setting and general feeling. If I didn't know you at all, I would be super immersed, but with that niggling feeling of "this could someone writing up some real bad poo poo and enjoying it for all the wrong reasons". Since I've gotten to, somewhat, know you through your posting here over the years, all I'm left with is a profound sense of gratitude that you got through it and that you are willing to write it down so the history of that war doesn't end up reduced to the usual dry history book blandness or the war porn of the chickenhawks.
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May 19, 2022 05:39
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I'm just gonna shut up and go with the flow. Sorry I'm difficult- part of my charm. It just feels strange. I've never been shy about sharing details and stories from my service- but writing it out is unusual and still feels...i dunno. Unnatural.       Edit- I wanted to share this, because it bugs me and y'all made me figure this out. I was the last in my company to draw R&R or leave; after my CO, who never left the wire. After my 1SG. After my PSG, Team Leader, and Squad Leader. No wonder I feel so drained of ambition and tired all the time. I spent 230+ days operational before a break my first tour. 230 days of daily operations, patrols, raids, and poo poo shows. 230 days of being on edge, getting popped at, and being hassled. What kind of loving lunatics look at the situation, "Hmm. Woody has been wounded, refused medevac. He's been a part of every major operation, volunteered for the tough assignments. He's the only member of his truck team to not get a break. Better send home Sgt Carter, the POS supply sergeant who only left the wire when we left the country." bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 04:09 on May 20, 2022 |
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May 20, 2022 03:13
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drat, dude. Just, drat. Thank you for letting us read all this.
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May 20, 2022 03:38
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bulletsponge13 posted:
First up: The problem with being utterly dependable is that people can and will depend on you beyond the point of reason. This unfortunately also means that they cannot make do without you. Obviously they can if they apply themselves to fill your role, but going above and beyond is not the natural choice of a human being when given an option that lets them conserve their own energy. Second: Could I get you to put a piece of scrap paper between the page you're writing on and the rest of the block? The writing is good and legible, but some of the ink seeps through the page and stains the next one in the block.
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May 20, 2022 06:30
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SerthVarnee posted:First up: 2nd thing first- I got you. It's because I'm using both sides, which I can knock off, no big deal. Bought new notebook yesterday, too! 😊 In the book Armor by John Steakley, a companion piece to Starship Troopers that focuses on the individual in combat. The main character falls through the admin cracks and just keeps getting put out. I realized the same thing happened to me- so long as I came out whole, they would keep sending me, and I'd keep asking. I can't fully blame the Unit- it was kids leading kids- but as a leader you take care of your people, they'll take care of you. And I had no clue how or when to advocate for myself. But loving hell. Everyday. Every drat mission. Every drat operation. Every raid. It doesn't help that we had two Anti Armor platoons to cover an area covered by 2 Infantry companies. We had the trucks, after all. The song 'I Was Only 19' was always heavy, but I turned 19 on that loving Island. 230+ days where there was work to be done. Not saying I didn't get a few hours here and there to gently caress around, but they were always sandwiched between work, running ragged because 'poo poo's Gotta Get Done, Sir'. My Daughter is 18. My Son is turning 17. I cannot fathom the idea of them being in that situation. E- the Unit meaning my company, not to be confused with CAG. bulletsponge13 fucked around with this message at 14:54 on May 20, 2022 |
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May 20, 2022 14:43
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I've put off reading this thread because I knew I'd want to wait until I had some time to give it my full attention Goddamn, dude, you can write.
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May 20, 2022 15:07
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McNally posted:Goddamn, dude, you can write.
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May 20, 2022 16:14
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bulletsponge13 posted:In the book Armor by John Steakley
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May 20, 2022 17:08
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stealie72 posted:Pretty unrelated, but if this resonated with you and you haven't already, read The Light Brigade by Kameron Hurley. It came out in the last few years and kind of uses Armor as a starting point for things to get much, much trippyer. I hadn't heard of it, but will add it. I know Steakley was working on Armor 2 when he passed, but was released ad hoc and unfiished. Starship Troopers, Armor, and The Forever War by Joe Haldeman serve as a trilogy- the first the grand scale, sanitized view. Armor being the brutal personal elements of warfare, including being forgotten and abandoned by leadership. The Forever War is post war, dealing with alienation and how was changes you. E- My therapist loves you guys.
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May 20, 2022 17:34
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bulletsponge13 posted:The Forever War is post war, dealing with alienation and how was changes you.
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May 20, 2022 17:48
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stealie72 posted:The Forever War legit blew my drat mind. It's one of those books that you want to somehow erase from your mind so that you can read it again. The first time I read it, I immediately started over because the time dilation hosed with my head so much. It's a wonderful and simple mechanic to explain changes. You don't feel different, but the whole world went on without you. Your best friends just won't click the same. It's tough.
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May 20, 2022 17:59
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Ok, I think I got enough in me for a little tonight. One will be a story about children and wildlife management. You guys pick: -My Favorite War Crime Or -Examples of Iraqi Mental Health
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May 20, 2022 23:43
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I vote for Examples of Iraqi Mental Health .
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May 20, 2022 23:53
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Just chiming in to say that these are absolutely fantastic reads, especially as someone who never served. Thank you for posting them!
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May 20, 2022 23:55
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-Examples of Iraqi Mental Health
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May 20, 2022 23:57
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Carteret posted:-Examples of Iraqi Mental Health
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May 21, 2022 00:17
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I served a few years in the Navy around 2004-2009 and never spent any time in the sandbox, but these stories take me there in a way other stories haven't. You have a true gift.Quackles posted:I vote for Examples of Iraqi Mental Health .
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May 21, 2022 00:22
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Quackles posted:I vote for Examples of Iraqi Mental Health . You can't drop a potential chapter title like that and just leave us with nothing.
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May 21, 2022 00:49
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I want you all to know I really want to ignore your vote to be an rear end in a top hat. But I won't. Something will go up later tonight, tomorrow morning at the latest.
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May 21, 2022 01:46
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You've got an incredible talent with words. The feeling to word count ratio is just off the charts. I completely understand the feeling weird about being praised thing. One thing I've learned is that when I pour my soul into something all I can see is where I stumbled. It's magnified all out of proportion and I'm confused that nobody is pointing at that part and saying "it would be good but" I think that's why the people who want to be in charge shouldn't is so true. Also I'm surprisingly liking the scanned hand written thing. At first it was annoying but after the first couple the text seems to intensify or calm with what's happening and it adds something I can't explain.
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May 21, 2022 02:15
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Sorry- didn't get enough down to finish a piece for tonight. But I wanted to do my daily thanks for you guys. I honestly expected this thread to be dead already; I expected maybe one or two posters will comment, maybe a few more will read; I totally expected any sane reader to blow off the entire endeavor- scans of handwriting in the 21st century seems like it might be legal punishment in Alabama. So thanks. It's really encouraging to see you guys commenting your enjoyment. It really is about you guys, too- 'war stories' of all types are a communal event. For thousands of years, these stories would have been shared by a fire, drinking, the storyteller finding volume from the listeners. Shay, in his works "Achilles in Vietnam" and "Odysseus in America" (among hundreds of others) theorize it was not only a way to pass on the wisdom and humor, but the bond around the fire allowed the Warriors (which I hate the term as applied in modern times) to decompress in steps, and the support of the community to ease the healing of wounds. That by listening, they bear some of the burden. That's what this is, and thank you.
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May 21, 2022 04:42
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bulletsponge13 posted:
Holy poo poo can I ever relate to those two statements (well okay in my case enjoyment might be the wrong word, but the captured attention and super supportive posters for sure). I made my little thread about epilepsy, expecting it to hit like 1 couple of hundred views or something. Got so exited when it pass 200 views, superhyped when some kind people gave it a gold rating and now I'm just staring at 13800 views, trying to figure out how the gently caress that happened.
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May 21, 2022 06:39
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SerthVarnee posted:Holy poo poo can I ever relate to those two statements (well okay in my case enjoyment might be the wrong word, but the captured attention and super supportive posters for sure). I've lurked that thread off and on, and have found it incredibly informative. It's honestly made me a little more aware of possible triggers in the world.
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May 21, 2022 07:02
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bulletsponge13 posted:Sorry- didn't get enough down to finish a piece for tonight. But I wanted to do my daily thanks for you guys. In addition to the decompression and the sharing, according to my therapist there are studies that show just giving voice to trauma verbally can help us process it, and giving voice to feelings of all sorts can attenuate them. Apparently this can be true of happiness as well, so like don’t mention it if you are really feeling awesome.
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May 21, 2022 09:52
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Just adding to the chorus of support here. Please, please, keep writing! Also, here are some of your better short vignettes from the idiots thread: bulletsponge13 posted:Let me tell you guys about the Iraqi EOD officer who assisted with a suspected IED in a tree. We cordon off the area, and Iraqi Police patrol happens by, and astoundingly, offer to help. bulletsponge13 posted:Nearly every Iraqi I met, I wish no ill on. They were regular people in a lovely, nearly impossible situation. Most were kinder to me than I deserved given the situation. Living in the city we became quasi-residents. Our "camp" which wasn't named, didn't even have a full company, and most days we spent 12 hours driving around the community, talking with people. It was great. I lived in the most IED sector of Baghdad at that time. We hit a handful, but were warned by the locals of at least a half dozen others, because we did everything we could to treat them the way we wanted to be treated. And we knew that every time we pulled a trigger, we were creating two more bad guys in OUR neighborhood. bulletsponge13 posted:I would war crime the gently caress out of some people for Baghdad Street food bulletsponge13 posted:This.
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May 21, 2022 12:08
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Lead out in cuffs posted:Just adding to the chorus of support here. Please, please, keep writing! Super dope of you to pull them out and post them. I will never be as cool as that Bomb Tech. I had a rough therapy session yesterday (bad enough my therapist needed to decompress and self care) it's just hitting me. I have a piece partially finished; but after posting a piece I kept getting interrupted on, I don't want to put up something like that again. I just don't want you guys to think I bailed or anything, but I want to at least feel like I did quality (not a strive for perfection. I'm not editing or anything, you guys still get the raw drafty nonsense. I'm up to a few pages (5, I think. Front side only for legibility) and about halfway, so it should be worth a wait.
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May 22, 2022 03:08
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I get where you're coming from with that sentiment. I got the same feeling with my epilepsy thread. "People are paying attention and praising me for the stories I tell, can't every stop telling stories now." That's just not how it works. You tell a story when your story is ready to be told. If you start trying to force them out on paper at a set interval, then quality is going out the window and people will start wandering off as the stories get diluted. This thread is your collection over however many hours or years it will take you to write them down. We'll be here until you tell us to go away. Don't try to force the writing like it was a day job.
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May 22, 2022 05:42
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Yeah if this thread doesn't update for like weeks at a time it's not going to bother anyone
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May 22, 2022 13:32
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What youre doing is creating a work of art. Dont focus on the “mona lisa” aspect of that term. You are working at producing a piece of art might be another way to say it that feels more honest about what it is. Key word is “work” though. Ive done enough writing to know the mental effort involved to just do 1 good page. It can flow out in 20 minutes, or it can take weeks. The thing about deeply personal work like this is that you are going to want it to be perfect, and there will be a temptation to just toss a piece in the trash when it doesnt flow easily or you cant get the tone right. Dont toss anything out. Put it in a folder when its not cooperating with you and come back to it later. Let your subconscious noodle on it for a couple days, and then have another go at that piece. Move the tone a little, try a different angle, eventually youll figure out how to tell it and itll work. You dont owe us a drat thing. This is not the newspaper comic business where you have to have tomorrow’s piece submitted by 5 pm. If you not nuthin today, tomorrow, for a week, for a month - absolutely fine. Deeply personal work is like that, and we get it. This is literally just a place for you to put it when it is ready for public consumption so its all in one place.
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May 22, 2022 14:04
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May 24, 2022 02:22
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drat.
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May 24, 2022 03:37
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I don't know how to translate that absolute absurdity of watching Paratroopers try to corral that Tasmanian devil girl. It was actually really funny to watch.
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May 24, 2022 03:52
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Jesus gently caress, the tazmanian devil story is both depressing and loving hilarious. I can visualize the "drat, our bad dude" to the family lol
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May 24, 2022 03:59
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The one that really hit me was the dude with the self-inflicted wounds. Just reminded me of the goon who talked about working for a charity orphanage/school in India. Having to turn away a physically handicapped but obviously mentally gifted kid because he was one year too old to accept when they were already overcrowded and understaffed. Watching that kid walk away after they had just snuffed out all the little candles of hope in his eyes of any kind of future. Same hopeless, powerless, utterly soulcrushing feeling that keeps you awake at night and there is nothing you can do about. And nothing you can tell yourself that is going to make it okay. Keep telling these stories buddy. Cause no-one else will and they are the only kind of stories that actually matter when it comes to showing what a war is. I feel like its gonna be a bit of a tonal whiplash to point it out after the previous sentence, but the image cut off a little bit of the first letter on each line at the top of the page. Not enough of a bother to be worth reuploading, but I figured you'd like the heads up so you notice it on the next picture you take. Man that feels weird and pedantic to point out.
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May 24, 2022 05:13
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Bear Kid is the real MVP of this chapter.
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May 24, 2022 07:05
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bulletsponge13 posted:I don't know how to translate that absolute absurdity of watching Paratroopers try to corral that Tasmanian devil girl. It was actually really funny to watch. I think you nailed it. A significant chunk of my civilian career was spent working with at-risk youth and I've seen rather similar situations.
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May 24, 2022 07:30
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Madurai posted:Bear Kid is the real MVP of this chapter. Bear kid rules. These (with the exception of 'Lie', which is the first time anyone has seen that admission) are all typically my favorite stories to tell verbally, because acting out the various parts is fun, so while something gets lost in this translation, I'm glad it still works.
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May 24, 2022 14:09
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I've read a bunch of the critically acclaimed books on the forever war (I'm a filthy civvy that didn't participate), and I don't think any one of them has painted as much of a picture of the Iraqi civilians as just some people trying to get through the day like everyone else. I loved reading these.
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May 24, 2022 14:40
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