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COSTCO!!!
PBUC
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I make terrible financial decisions here.
BRING BACK THE COMBO SLICE
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Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Pennywise the Frown posted:

I get these but have never read one. Anything interesting in it?

My boss made me come in on my day off to tell me that Costco Connection is the fourth most circulated magazine in the US. So probably not

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Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Game informer was number 2 for a really long time. No idea bout the others

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Their patties ain't half bad. Best brand for fake chicken

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

That's not great macros compared to actual chicken though.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Our Pumpkin Pies are absolute garbage. The recipe on the cans of Pumpkin we use is better than the poo poo we make. If you buy a Pumpkin Pie from costco you're a dumbass

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Shear Modulus posted:

What does Costco do if I want to complain about something going on sale right after I buy it? Can I just go to the customer service desk and complain to get the price difference or would I have to theoretically buy a new one and return it with the old receipt?

Hit up membership

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Toxic Mental posted:

How does Costco get carrot cake so insanely right but gently caress up pumpkin pies

Do they just use the absolute worst quality pumpkin filling or something?

Naw it's the same poo poo you get in the stores. The problem with the Pumpkin Pies is there's so many places they can go wrong that you're pretty much always going to gently caress them up.

1.They're bland, like all costco freshfare they're just made to be plain. The ingredients are literally Pie mix, Pumpkin, water, Cornstarch, and Eggs.

2.We're making industrial levels of product in commercial level facilities. For example during the month of Thanksgiving we do about 20,000 pies. We have two mixers, each one of which can only mix 80 pies at once and this is overfulling them it should only be sixty. That's 250 bowls of pies to make, then we need to pump them into the shells one at a time, bake them for an hour in the oven, one hour of floor time, and one hour in the freezer all before they're wrapped. Basically to keep up on the production we need one person full time mixing one person pressing shells, one person filling and two people wrapping. This is in addition to all the other items like Cakes and Muffins that need to be hand mixed and dropped or cookies that need to be panned up. Further more those pie crusts are also all made by hand, so in addition to 250 bowls of Pie we need 100 bowls of crusts made and frozen before the season even starts.

Each one of the crusts needs to be mixed from blocks of shortening and flour, weighed, pressed in a mold, divided out onto sheet pans and then frozen before being palatized. People rush this and gently caress the crusts up all the time which makes them not hold their shape when you press them, if you seen ones with soft crowns that's probably what happened.

3. Our equipment is not made to handle the volume we have. We have one heated pie press that we need to operate continuously. If it's too hot it melts the shortening inside the crust and ruins it's texture. If it's too cold then the crust sticks and you have to scrape it off and lose time and product. So when we run it for so long at a time it gets cold which ruins the pies, so people turn in up which makes it too hot and ruins the pies.

Our Pneumatic pump is also fully not ready for the amount we do. For pushing a rack or two it's fine but for continuous operation like we do it breaks down constantly with seals slipping out and pie mix spraying everywhere, which means we need to stop everything we're doing break down something with entirely too many parts, clean and dry them, and then put them all back together again only for it to break again in a few racks. Plus if the thing does stay together our air compressor can't keep up which means the per pie volume gets hosed up which means we need to hand pour until it builds the tank back up.

4. Costco is a retail operation not a food service operation and they operate on retail logic, i.e. more bodies equals more quick. But when you send a bunch of chuckle fucks who don't want to be back there into a slow moving disaster of a dept someone, read me, needs to spend most of their shifts making sure they're making at least a small amount of actual effect on our actual operations instead of just eating our labor dollars for no gain.

5. We need to raise the drat price

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

No we lose a fuckton on the pies

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

I started them last week

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

All the bakery stuff and I've worked food court and deli before

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

DamnitGannet posted:

What’s the worst department and why is it
Food court? I’m kidding (mostly), it seems like all the food based departments have similar problems and complaints.
Food Court gets poo poo on by the other depts which is hilarious given how loving stupid and incapable most of front end is. Which dept is best and worst really depends on the manager, a good manager makes any dept fine, a bad one means you transfer. Front end is the worst though, I could not stand standing in place for hours scanning poo poo. Made me want to blow my brains out.

Psion posted:

what are your actual "I would suggest you buy this" favorite bakery items, past or present

None, I can, and probably you as well, make anything we sell better with ease.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Infidel Castro posted:

After the gas station I worked at was bought out and I was laid off, I got a seasonal offer to work as a tire installer. If it was permanent I probably would have taken it over the job I eventually took.

Considering how quickly we run through tire shop employees you could have easily made it to full time if you'd come

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Whole lotta people never had a grandma make them a pumpkin pie

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

People who call it soda don't deserve human rights.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Plants rot faster

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Pizza's are fresh, but I don't think we sell take and bakes anymore. They had a push awhile back to try and make the pizza better, put in proofers to get the dough proofed right since so many people were just using it straight out the cooler. Personally I think they put too many toppings on. The Cheese is 1#8oz of cheese, that's too much. The Chicken bakes come in frozen now which is nice cause it sucked making those every morning

jeeves posted:

I’ve made pizzas in my teenage years and raw sausage loving sucks to work with and try to get into pizzas. It’s sticky…

Sausage came in frozen

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

They don't have Papa Murphy's where you are

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

I've never had a bad experience at a Papa Murphy's. They're always clean and the staff always seems pretty happy to be working there. Not having the stress of delivery or baking the pizzas must do wonders for them

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

The turkey sandwich was good

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Enos Cabell posted:

Can get them in pretty much every grocery store in my great plains state. I think all of the Papa Murphys here closed though.

Not a big fan of take and bake anyway, home ovens aren't as hot as pizza ovens.

Break the lock and put it on self clean

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Papa Murphy's business is not based on SNAP sales.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Homie, critical thinking skills. Their store distribution does not follow maps of economically depressed areas. Their franchising model is based on their reduced equipment, store size, and staffing needs because of their lack of hot food. The SNAP sales are a coincidence.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Kirkland has their own brand which is fully decent

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Lmao this guy doesn't know about the diamond membership

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Do it again this year, don't buy one. Buy two

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

They freeze well for next time

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

The servings are for half a muffin iirc

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

I'm almost surprised how little people have noticed how much we've jacked up the prices in bakery. The cinnamon loaf, muffins, cookies, bread it's all gone up.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

The Midniter posted:

Visited the 'Co this past weekend and we couldn't decide between the chicken pot pie or the sheperd's pie for dinner. Having found the pot pie bland some years back we ended up going with the sheperd's and it was an excellent decision - this thing is delicious.

I wonder how laborious/annoying they are to make.

At home? You just make a thick stew and cover it with mashed potatoes

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

The first use of Cottage pie predates Shepards pie by fifty or so years

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Wendigee posted:

you can use whatever meat you want who cares. go crazy used ground turkey

No you can't

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Snickers own. Make some Snickers salad sometime

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Skechers does not make good shoes

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Spindrift wasn't even worth stealing when I worked a previous job and had the opportunity. Absolute trash tier. Get some real sparkling water like Polar

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Grapefruit is a fantastic citrus. I'm sorry that all of you peoples taste buds are broke as gently caress. Maybe stop cramming your face full of Glizzys so you can learn to appreciate the finer things in life, like La Croix

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

1. Limes
2. Lemons
3.Blood Oranges
4.Grapefruit
5.Oranges
6.Mandarins
7.Pummelo(What even is this?)

That's the definitive list of citrus. If you disagree you're simply wrong.

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

CaptainSarcastic posted:

Interesting you live in a world where tangerines don't exist.

Unless they're sleeping I don't wanna hear it

Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

As they should. Quebec is a legitimate country, the rest of Canada is just confused Americans

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Gaius Marius
Oct 9, 2012

Its pop

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