- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Insane rereg guy is the "many people do not like my posting" lawsuit guy. and I'm pretty sure this has been going on for longer than 6 months.
Anyone here have a link to the original post?
EDIT: Nvm, found the origin of the phrase!
CommissarMega fucked around with this message at 20:37 on Apr 10, 2024
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Apr 10, 2024 20:23
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May 17, 2024 15:35
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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wrt to the trans Nazi, what I'd like to know from OP is if there is any chance of extricating the two of them from the Nazi's family. I guess I'm kind of sympathetic because I was exactly that kind of shithead in my teenage years, thanks to being raised in a similar kind of environment, and I do wish I had an easy way out instead of having to figure things out on my own from info I picked up here and there on the Internet.
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Apr 14, 2024 01:28
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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...am I the only one who doesn't mind the two people feeding each other? I mean, yeah it's kind of cringey, but I'm not sure where people are getting overtly sexual themes from- it just seems like some overly cutesy romantic stuff to me. Maybe it'd warrant an eye roll at best, perhaps some gossip later about how googly-eyed the two were, and some gentle ribbing at the office (assuming one or both worked in the same office I do), but that's it.
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Apr 16, 2024 01:55
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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My personal favourite Reddit story is this one from r/StoriesAboutKevin, in somewhat the same vein as the 'twins take 18 months' guy:
quote:He Wants to DNA Test Her Kids
So... I can't even completely wrap my brain around this Kevin, but when my friend "Sage" told me this story, I just HAD to get her permission to post it here. She gave it, so here we go. Fair warning, I fear the number of IQ points that may be lost in reading this...
Sage started dating Kevin about two years before this incident. Things seemed to be going all right between them. She told me he was a bit of a derp and sometimes incredibly oblivious to some things. He couldn't pick up subtle cues, and even suggestions flew over his head with about a mile of airspace between his skull and the suggestion. She originally chalked it up to him being on the autism spectrum, as she has a few other friends who have similar problems picking up cues. So she just switched her behavior from "talking to neurotypical" to "talking to neurodivergent" and the bumps smoothed out for a while.
All is well and good.
Then the talk of taking the relationship seriously came up. Marriage. Becoming a family.
And that's when the plane hit the mountain with a cartoonish bang.
Kevin announced that he wanted to DNA test Sage's kids. To make sure they were his. Kids who were 5 and 3 when Sage and Kevin started dating.
Sage said she had to come to a full stop in the conversation for several seconds while her brain rebooted.
Sage: "They're NOT your kids. You know they're not. My ex-husband and I had them together before I ever met you."
(She had still been pregnant with the youngest when she and her ex had finalized the divorce. Whole other story.)
Kevin: "Yeah, and now that we're getting married, they'll become mine. I just want to DNA test them to be sure of it."
Sage: "Let me see if I understand this... Do you..... do you actually think my children's DNA will..... change... to become biologically yours when you adopt them?"
Kevin: "Obviously. I just want the confirmation on paper is all."
[insert That'sNotHowThisWorksThat'sNotHowAnyOfThisWorks meme here]
There was a long conversation about how DNA didn't work that way, with his rebuttal that adopting them would make them BECOME his. Then there had to be a conversation that becoming his children would only happen on paper, and in the legal system. That no, the children would NOT magically transform into his own biological children once the paperwork was filled out. Him insisting that EVERYBODY said the kids became theirs once adoption happened. Her explaining the concept of "adopted children are loved just as much as if they were biological" and that was what that meant. Him insisting that everything pointed to kids BECOMING "theirs."
His mom eventually had to become involved to back Sage up. His DAD had to become involved to back Sage up. A few books had to get involved to back Sage up.
Kevin was furious! He couldn't understand why people would EVER adopt a kid if the kid didn't "become" the actual, biological child of the people who took them in. How stupid and selfish it was, for kids to retain the DNA of the sperm/egg donor! How could any kid who wanted to be adopted REFUSE to change one little thing so they could have parents?! "DNA doesn't work that way" is a bullshit excuse!
He ranted. He raved, and right in front of his own parents, he told her that if her kids weren't going to become his kids, then the marriage wasn't going to happen.
He told her that he would give them all a week to change their minds and agree to be his biological kids. He said WHEN they stopped being selfish, and WHEN the DNA test proved it, he would take the kids in.
Sage to me: "And that's how the relationship ended."
Me: "Uhhhh, wait, hang on, was he just looking for an excuse to break it off? Did he just get cold feet or want to date around some more or....?"
Sage: "Nope. He really is just that stupid. His mom called me on the sly and very gently suggested that I just break it off with Kevin, because no matter how much she and his dad talk to him, he's adamant about it. He's even saying that he will NEVER date a woman with kids from here on out unless they agree to change their DNA to become his if the relationship becomes serious."
So Sage is single again, having dodged a tactical nuke. God help everyone if he ever breeds...
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Apr 17, 2024 09:48
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Iirc, it got an inconclusive update (as to why the parents did it), but the kid had made his peace with it and the parents seemed to be regretting it.
ANy update is a good update, even if it isn't the one we wanted. If anyone's got a link to the original, I'd like to see it myself.
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Apr 17, 2024 19:39
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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quote:AITAH for telling a friend his beauty standards for a partner are unachievable for him?
Ok I’ll start this off by saying my friend isn’t what you would “ugly” but he definitely isn’t going to be offered a modelling contract anytime soon. His problem is he is forever moaning about being single (to the point that I think it may be affecting him mentally). But when I point out women who seem to be warming to him where he could have a chance he will always point out the things he doesn’t want in a partner ( overweight, has to be good looking and so on).
So last week while a group of us were out (we have all been friends for many years) the conversation about him being single came up. He started talking about his standards and how he would rather be single than settle for less. Maybe I was wrong but I kind of said to him that if the woman he likes has the same standards as he does, then he wouldn’t stand a chance. There was few seconds of silence after that then we just moved on to a different conversation. Afterwards while talking to another one of the friend group he said that I was a bit out of order ( U.K. slang for being a bit horrible) and was basically calling my friend ugly. I seriously didn’t mean it in that way, but I do believe he is setting his sights on people out of his league, and so far with him being single I’ve been proven right. Was I being an rear end in a top hat in that situation?
I want a 100/10 super-hottie! What do you mean, "what would I bring?"
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Apr 18, 2024 11:44
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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I know the classics posts were about 10 pages back but this one has to be included:
My (29F) Boyfriend (29M) keeps getting into fights with a cook at Waffle House
Didn't this guy keep getting into fights and losing them? Or am I confusing them with someone else?
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Apr 19, 2024 04:59
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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I dunno; there are certainly people out there who are this oblivious/self-centered.
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Apr 21, 2024 22:38
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Original was sadly suspended, I found it in a compilation of clueless lesbian relationships posts but the original thread seems to be gone.
Aw, that's a bummer. Thanks anyway!
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Apr 28, 2024 03:37
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Real disappointed in my kid Kenshiro after he became a psychiatrist.
EDIT: Come to think of it though, there are plenty of anime names (or Westernized anime names) that might work as real names, at least in the West- off the top of my head, Ash, Ken and Phoenix come to mind.
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May 1, 2024 02:48
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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A happy coming out story: A series.
quote:My brother came out. Some tips/help
I'm 25M straight. My brother is 18. 2 of us in the family. We grew up in a very Christian household. I left as soon as I could. My brother and I were never really close because we were very different.
About 3 weeks ago my brother rocked up at my door. It was a bit strange because we barely see each other. We had a few drinks and he started crying. He said he was gay and our parents kicked him out and he has nowhere to go.
Hes been staying on my couch since. I went "home" and collected his stuff. The language they used about him was utterly disgusting whilst I was packing.
I am worried for him. He doesn't leave the house, i think he cut himself (im not 100% sure but he has history of it) and he's gone from I'm gay to I don't want to be gay. He's also saying he might go home to our parents and sort out being gay (whatever that means).
Im not at all equipped to deal with this. I've offered counselling to him, but he doesn't want to speak to strangers. I've flipped out at my parents to sort themselves out (although thats pointless). My girlfriend has a friend who is gay and I got her to invite him over. That did not work. I just seeing it going one tragic way.
I don't know what to do. Sorry this is all over the place.
Edit: thanks for all the replies. just booked a cabin for me and the bro tomorrow. Nice peaceful spot. I go there a bit to clear my head. I don't think I can do much about the gay thing but I can at least bond with him over fishing and stuff. He will probably hate fishing but we can do his thing the next time. No gf. No kid. Me and him and some peace to hash things out.
Haha only just noticing some of your usernames. Gave me a chuckle.
I'll be offline for a day or two fishing. No connection but thanks to all who replied.
quote:Update: my brother came out
First off thanks to everyone for all the replies. I'll try to get to all of them. If I don't, apologies. There was some brilliant advice. Skip to the last paragraph the rest of this is poo poo.
3 hour car journey and it was a little awkward at the beginning, but eventually I explained why I left home. Admitted I was wrong not to make an attempt keeping in touch with him. Reiterated I was glad he came to me and i like having my brother back. He asked what about Emily (my gf)? I said something stupid; "bro stay in your lane. I get the girls and you get the boys". He actually kind of laughed at it.
I decided for the rest of the trip no walking on egg shells. The gf wasn't there to keep me in line anyway. Joke etc.
We headed out on the water in a row boat (dont ask). Decided to freak him out by rowing against him and we started going around in circles. The bollox hit me but he was laughing.
When we got out on the lake he did ask what my parents had said about my kid and I told him.
After our meal we went for a stroll. He said I don't want to be gay. I don't see any life in it. People will look at me weirdly etc. I said I didn't want to be a teen dad. I didn't see a life in it and now I couldn't imagine my life any other way and that he's not good looking enough for people to stare. He called me a twat and said you know what I mean. I said gently caress me. gently caress our parents. gently caress religion (there are plenty of religions that are not anti gay(advice i got from you guys)). gently caress everyone. You can wallow in self hate (stopped to congratulate myself on such a word, and I got my probably fifth hit of the day) or you can try to accept it. He asked what I would do if I were him. I said I'd be completely jealous of my older brother's good looks. Sixth hit lol. I said, if I were him, I'd try to realise our parents is not the place to be, right now. I would try to accept what I am and realise it won't change. I'd get a job (even if it's a couple of hours) and I would try meeting my devilishly good looking brother half way because he's completely out of his depth and is only trying to help. Seventh hit. I got him smiling though.
He then asked if I had any regrets about my relationship with my parents. I said no. I said when you have a kid in 15 years time with your guy you'll understand how odd they are being. My daughter could tell me anything apart from shes a liverpool fan and I'd still love her.
We got back. I threw on a movie with the hottest male actor I could think of - Andrew Garfield in Spiderman 2. Anyway, hopped on the bed and he brought over a chair. I was like what the gently caress you doing with the chair? Hop on the bed, ya dope. He was reluctant. He found it very awkward but as the movie went on he got better.
During the movie I said you asked me what I would do if I were you. I would definitely do someone who looks like Andrew Garfield if i were you. Called me a twat and hit me again but smiling.
Next morning i packed up our stuff and chanced my arm heading home by asking him to have one pint at a gay bar. Told him we could pick a booth in the corner. You can pretend you are straight. No one will know you. He really didn't want to but I reminded him I'm the better looking brother (I'm not btw) so I'm screwed. Another hit.
He agreed to go in. It was very early so it was quiet. He got a seat. I got the drinks. I got hit on. Funny interaction. We had a quick zero alc pint and left. In hindsight probably too soon to go to a bar but he was fine. We were left alone.
He told my gf we went into a gay bar. She roared with laughter that I was at a gay bar. I told her I turned down a guy who was "up for anything" at 12.30 in the day. There better be good sex tonight or I know where I'm going tomorrow. And she hit me and said hed be doing her a favour. I asked why the gently caress is everyone hitting me and my brother said because you're a twat.
The one thing I learned is I'm his brother and not his parent. I'm not there to fix things. I'm there to be a bit of a dickhead and not take myself too seriously around him. Even if it's just two days at least he's chatting and not totally down in the dumps. Even the gf noticed it.
quote:Visiting our parents - brother coming out
I'm just gonna note some bog events of my bro coming out and some day when he's ready I'll give him the account to look back at. I'm not posting it into any subreddit because I've annoyed people enough haha
Yesterday we visited our parents, on my bro's request. I was totally against the idea because mostly I thought he would move back in with them and I finally thought he was making some progress.
We arrived at the house. Both disgusted to see us. I contemplate which one of their two sons they were most disgusted by haha.
We sat down. They offered me a cup of tea but not my bro. I found that odd but anyway. I declined.
They asked why we wanted to visit and before I could answer my bro said that the last time he left he was in a bit of a hurry and didn't get to say a few things.
He said something along the lines of he doesn't like that he likes men (was surprised/impressed at how his voice did not shake) but he said at some time he will probably get used to that idea. He then said he will probably never get over how his parents treated him. He said when they are old and grey inside a care home they will always be reminded by the two sons they threw away when they see other residents have visitors and they have no one (I thought to myself BOOOOOM).
He went on to say. I'd love to have a relationship some time from afar if they ever want to but for now his life is around me and he touched me on the shoulder. The look of disgust especially from my mother was disgraceful. He said I'm done and walked out.
I walked out after him but turned around and gave our parents a few choice words and they said how do you let him touch you, we knew you were a bad parent but letting him in the same house as your daughter is a low even for me.
I said oh that's why you didn't offer him tea? Well Mom, Dad I won't be taking parenting advice from you, no offence. I actually want my daughter to visit me at the care home. I explained the really sad part is if you went out apologised and gave the lad a hug you could still have one son in your life but you are sad little people with sad little beliefs.
Got in the car. Said all was fine. And said we went all the way up here for a 3 minute speech and laughed it off.
"Well Mom, Dad I won't be taking parenting advice from you, no offence. I actually want my daughter to visit me at the care home." 
EDIT: I also like that part of the discussions in the last update post devolved(?) into footy talk 
CommissarMega fucked around with this message at 07:08 on May 1, 2024
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May 1, 2024 07:06
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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'Silas' makes me think of cowboys, or classy criminals; not sure where the father's getting that connotation from. If they were descended from enslaved Africans, mmmaybe it was the name of one of their ancestors or one of their ancestors' slavers (I can certainly see a slaver with that name)- but even so, who else outside the family would make that connection?
EDIT: One commenter in the Reddit thread (don't worry, I'm just reading, not touching the poop) mentioned that the parents might be mixing the name up with Cyrus, which is apparently rising in popularity among black communities in America; I'm Malaysian, so I can't be sure.
CommissarMega fucked around with this message at 05:45 on May 2, 2024
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May 2, 2024 05:37
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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I think my favorite line in there is "I always stood for my son and admonished my husband in private and told my son not to take it seriously in the heat of the moment"
Yeah, it's my 'favourite' too. What a horrible POS mother.
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May 3, 2024 18:55
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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"I've tried everything. I tried agreeing quietly, I tried deflecting, and I've even tried indirectly suggesting their input isn't appreciated!"
"Did you try directly asking them to stop?"
"Oh, no, not that."
I don't know, I think
quote:I've even straight-up told them that I'm happy with my food the way it is.
looks like a very direct way of saying it. If they don't take the hint then, a firm' "stop it" wouldn't cut it.
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May 7, 2024 15:35
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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AITAH for telling my fiancee that she's useless in an emergency and shouldn't brag about how tough she is?
I feel like there was probably a better way OP could have phrased it, but he's not wrong.
Same; at most, I personally would have stopped at "Even a couple of kids breaking a car window with a baseball bat?" but if his full statement is what it takes for her to realize she's being an Internet Tough Guy, that's what it takes.
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May 9, 2024 04:31
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Note the bit where they told him he'd be damned for changing his own name.
I'm guessing OP escaped a cult where they worship Britain's Regency period or something? Those names do sound like they came out of a Jane Austen novel, except for Herbert, which to me sounds like the most stereotypical West Country farmer name.
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May 11, 2024 17:02
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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Holy  Batman
quote:Male boss is clueless about pregnancy
OMG this just now happened at work.
My boss is male. I have a male coworker in the next cube whose wife is pregnant, and is due within the next few weeks. Boss is trying to make coverage plans for this guy to be out of the office when the baby happens.
The boss literally tried to write the guy up because he "wouldn't" tell him exactly what day the delivery would happen.
I wouldn't have believed it if I didn't hear it with my own ears! quote:Update 1
Holy poo poo. The idiot dude just did it again.
He finally got it into his head why my coworker can't name the specific date when his wife will go into labor.
Now he's trying to save face by being sympathetic with Mr. Father-to-Be.
Our office breakroom has a private "mother's room" where women can go pump if they need to.
Mr. Boss dude said to the father dude, literally, that he was sorry there wasn't an equivalent father's room. The dude legit thought that the mother's room was for an exhausted new mom to go nap. That one just earned him a march into his (female) boss' office. I'd love to be a fly on that wall. quote:Update 2
So, several of you asked for further updates about my idiot boss who, in the space of one hour yesterday revealed that he:
thought that pregnant women could predict the exact date their delivery would happen...
revealed his belief that our office's Mother's Room was for napping, not pumping
After #2 was revealed, he was immediately called into the (female) grandboss' office so she could set the record straight. Their meeting took about ten minutes, and then he came back into our work area.
Guys. It got so much worse from there. I had to delay posting this update until I found out what the final result would be.
He starts by admitting to everybody there (mostly male, I and one other person in the room were female) that he had misunderstood the purpose of the mother's room. OK, so far so good.
Then he took out his metaphorical shovel and started digging his hole even deeper. Turns out he also misunderstood the concept of lactation. The dude literally thought that all women are always lactating, all the time. As in: the breasts come in, the milk comes out, regardless of any woman's pregnancy or birthing status.
And then. Oh. My. God. The dude literally POINTS TO MY CHEST and says, "I mean, look at hers! Hers are really big, she should be in that room all the time but she's not!"
One of the men in the room immediately gives him a forceful "shut up!" I follow up with a spontaneous performance of four-letter beat poetry that would melt my phone if I tried to type it out.
One of my coworkers immediately went out to fetch the grandboss again. She got back into the room and escorted him out. We didn't see him the rest of the day.
I got to the office this morning and saw his personal items boxed up on his desk. Grandboss has already informed me that my now-ex boss will be coming to collect his items later today, and she gave me the opportunity to be elsewhere when he arrives.
Nope. I'm going to be here to watch him get fired. This will be glorious. quote:Final update
He came through just now to collect his box of stuff. He was escorted into our office by grandboss and our building's security guard. I was looking straight at him all the way through, trying to gauge his state of mind.
He looked appropriately humiliated. At one point he locked eyes with me, noticed my poo poo-eating grin, and looked like he was about to say something.
Mr. Male Coworker in the next cube (the one with the pregnant wife, whose interaction yesterday started this whole thing) had a video queued up on his desktop. At that exact moment he hit "play".
It's an eight-second clip of my hero George Takei, who said the only words that needed to be said to this guy.
He slumped, defeated, and slithered out of the building with his escort. Once he left the room, all of us just burst out laughing.
It's going to be a great weekend.
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May 11, 2024 17:33
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May 17, 2024 15:35
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- CommissarMega
- Nov 18, 2008
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THUNDERDOME LOSER
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It was easy sitcom binge during Covid. Similar to a bunch of other sitcoms like Modern Family and reality tv like Survivor.
Yeah, I know quite a few zoomers (is that the term for 20-30 somethings in 2024?) who got into Friends during the plague years, at least here in Malaysia. Not sure why Friends specifically, and not, say, Married with Children or the Simpsons, but there you go.
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May 14, 2024 09:14
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Apr 10, 2024 20:23
Don't saddle your kid with expectations from the name you gave them ffs