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KittyLitter posted:And gently caress ME SIDEWAYS - what's the deal with even LAUNCHING a campaign when you haven't even written the loving book yet? This dickhead has given us NOTHING. That would be because the campaign is to fund his lifestyle while he writes the book.
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Jun 18, 2013 15:17
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If it had a double butterfly twist I would have said "meh" but a triple butterfly twist? Pledged for $500 which means I get some magnets, posters, and the books apparently. Oh joy.
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Jun 18, 2013 15:48
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Sucklord toy figures - shaped like M.U.S.C.L.E. http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1790677689/suckle-mini-figures-created-by-the-super-sucklord I totally support this venture of suck 
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Jun 18, 2013 16:52
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Jedit posted:That would be because the campaign is to fund his lifestyle while he writes the book. That's so cynical. Obviously this author just wants the creative freedom that big-money investors (who he went to and refused to fund his lovely book) won't allow. He also wants us to be his Think Thank.
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Jun 18, 2013 17:04
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I like how he says he doesn't care about money and just wants to bring reading to kids and then in the publishing section explains that he needs a big pile of cash up front because he wants to choose the publishing option that [he thinks] will make him more money.
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Jun 18, 2013 17:30
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Kro-Bar posted:That's so cynical. Obviously this author just wants the creative freedom that big-money investors (who he went to and refused to fund his lovely book) won't allow. He also wants us to be his Think Thank. Aside from their EXTREME SPELLING reminding me of the 1990s I showed their kickstarter to some friends who pointed out that there's a website. The 90s called they'd like their gifs back. In fact every single page on that webpage and the entire kickstarter lookslike someone went into a cryopod in the 1990s and woke up just in time to do a kickstarter. The write up of the Jade Twins is disturbingly similar to what you'd see in a 90s style fighting game. Well either that or one of those corny character write-ups you'd find in GI Joe comics. If not for that I might ignore the fact that Nika Laquez has Physical Abilities: Paurkur and Acrobatics. Still there is in their description of the story the promise of considerable originality quote:The Jade Series is a series of six fantasy novels that will be written by N. V. Williams. The books will chronicle the adventures of a set of 12 year old opposite sex twins named Nika and Cohen Laquez. Wow! Normal books would only have one or two protagonists, but here we have a set of 12 year old twins being the protagonists. Given that they all apparently have the same name I wonder if they will be some sort of weird Kung Fu hive-mind. quote:In this world, the Jade will develop through their adolescence, Clearly my weird Kung-Fu hive-mind idea must be right, for normal children would "go through" adolescence or "develop as they pass through their adolescence", but here their adolescence itself develops them into some sort of weird kung-fu hive-mind. quote:learn to conquer social and emotional issues, Conquer them! Not overcome, or deal with, or learn to navigate, or any such thing. No, they are conquered. quote:gain friendships, Unlike normal people who gain friends. I wonder if friendships here is some sort of magical sea-faring vessels. quote:experience puppy love as well as strengthen their powers and martial abilities in an effort to prepare themselves for the confrontation that lies ahead. Yeah... quote:The Jade Series' novels will fall within the genre of fantasy literature; however, in many respects they will also be bildungsromans, or coming of age novels and contain elements of mystery, adventure, magic, mythology and martial arts. The novels will also be what you might call shrewd mystery tales. Each book will be constructed in the manner of a Sherlock Holmes-style mystery adventure. The stories will also be told from a third person limited point of view. Presumably they will also form themselves into paper golems that will do household chores if you smear them with blood and Worcestershire sauce. This is just Dunning-Kruger territory. These people are so bad at writing and marketing their books that they are utterly incapable of understanding how bad they are at writing and marketing their books. It is just utterly, utterly dire. You could write entire *pages* on everything that is wrong with this, and it still wouldn't be enough.
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Jun 18, 2013 17:39
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The Next Harry Potter posted:Pledge $10 or more It's not a pledge, it's an investment. And yes, they misspell "fridge" every single time. The Next Harry Potter posted:Pledge $200 or more Five PDFs, two magnets, two posters and a light-up t-shirt. $200. Incredible. Norseman posted:If not for that I might ignore the fact that Nika Laquez has Physical Abilities: Paurkur and Acrobatics. Did you not notice that Nika has "Paurkur" while Cohen has "Paukur"? That it gets worse, somehow? FAQ's about The Jade Series posted:Q: Is The Jade Series an American book series? This is less Dunning-Kruger territory and more "SmarterChild debates himself".
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Jun 18, 2013 18:13
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opaopa13 posted:
$200 but the ability to iron fist your way through enemies? Priceless
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Jun 18, 2013 20:34
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The Next Harry Potter posted:We also plan to head off our marketing efforts with various YouTube viral campaigns to initiate THE BUZZ. After such, we anticipate fans creating viral campaigns of their own centered on the Jade, which will in return create more buzz!  (USER WAS PUT ON PROBATION FOR THIS POST)
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Jun 18, 2013 21:07
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Norseman posted:Aside from their EXTREME SPELLING reminding me of the 1990s I showed their kickstarter to some friends who pointed out that there's a website. quote:SUTI - A Guardian Angle who has watched over the Jade since the beginning. I... I think I want him to be funded. I need to read what comes of this. It may be the greatest train wreck ever put to paper. I don't even want him to hire an editor. I want to read his book in all of its raw, misspelled glory.
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Jun 18, 2013 21:44
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dijon du jour posted:I... I think I want him to be funded. You could bite the bullet and pledge, unless he gets $60.000 your money is safe, but this way you get to ask him questions in the comments field. I am seriously wondering if this is some kind of weird performance art.
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Jun 18, 2013 22:23
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http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1336904045/slender-man-plush-toy Yep.
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Jun 18, 2013 22:30
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Jun 18, 2013 22:47
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OH GOD. Is that... Fiesta Cat? (Checks link...) Sweet Jesus for a minute I thought someone Kickstarted a Fiesta Cat plush. I was about to poo poo my pants.
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Jun 18, 2013 23:16
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senrath posted:So, while the kickstarter itself isn't really awful, DoubleFine's Massive Chalice kickstarter has added support for pledging with bitcoins. It's really dead simple to set up a button that will take bitcoins and sell them for cash to your paypal automatically now, I imagine it's something along those lines not some special effort or moral statement or anything like that. As mentioned, Humble Bundle added the same option.
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Jun 18, 2013 23:24
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A 32" plush. It's a loving Slenderman body pillow, isn't it? There are people who will be frotting Slenderman.
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Jun 18, 2013 23:30
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Snowglobe of Doom posted:TJS: Destined To Be The Next Harry Potter! His publishing company has discovered something they like to call "The Appeal Formula". The formula has seven elements to create a hit: 1. A captivating story 2. A unique world 3. Unique fantasy elements 4. Unique characters 5. Relatable protagonists 6. Suspenseful cliffhangers 7. Originality It must have taken a team at NASA to crunch the numbers to come up with this criteria. I don't get why other publishers haven't tried "originality" or "unique characters" yet; I'm so tired of seeing Hamlet and Grendle appear in my media!
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Jun 19, 2013 00:11
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dijon du jour posted:I... I think I want him to be funded. You can read the Maradonia series as covered on Conjugal Felicity to tide you over while this guy writes his hit novels.
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Jun 19, 2013 00:44
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Jedit posted:A 32" plush. It's a loving Slenderman body pillow, isn't it? There are people who will be frotting Slenderman. Any excuse to mention that the Kickstarter for GOTY Barkley 2 just finished manufacturing one of their rewards:  Cyberdwarf body pillow 
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Jun 19, 2013 01:08
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Well the figures linked in the Kickstarter seem a lot better than the Plush, I kinda want the Jersey Devil one. 
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Jun 19, 2013 01:14
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Whoever came up with slender man here should have copyrighted it.
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Jun 19, 2013 01:34
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http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/fredrin/megatokyo-visual-novel-game Megatokyo still has enough of a fanbase to raise 80% of their $20k funding goal in a single day.
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Jun 19, 2013 01:45
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Marenghi posted:Whoever came up with slender man here should have copyrighted it. Trollface is copyrighted, and it didn't stop a bunch of people from using it without permission.
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Jun 19, 2013 01:50
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Unguided posted:http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/fredrin/megatokyo-visual-novel-game Hahahahaha his top stretch goal is to turn his terrible anime game into a terrible porn anime game. quote:$500,000: Excessively Romantic Content. Anyone familiar with visual novels know that most of them contain love scenes of one kind or another for various paths. I typically shy away from showing this sort of thing, but in good humor i present the possibility as a stretch goal. I call it the 'blurred' stretch goal. Can I go there? Yes, I can. Will I? Make me
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Jun 19, 2013 01:54
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...of SCIENCE! posted:Any excuse to mention that the Kickstarter for GOTY Barkley 2 just finished manufacturing one of their rewards: Seriously, if there was some way to buy this post-Kickstarter (I didn't have enough money back then  ), then I'd be all over it. And the pillow
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Jun 19, 2013 04:08
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CommissarMega posted:Seriously, if there was some way to buy this post-Kickstarter (I didn't have enough money back then I would probably sell mine. I wanted to give them lots of money, getting the pillow was kind of secondary. The pillowcase has been sitting on a shelf unused since it arrived. Unless usign it makes it more valuable, like selling used lingerie to pervs, in which case I can CUSTOM USE IT FOR YOUR PLEASURE for a fee.
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Jun 19, 2013 04:12
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Pastrymancy posted:Hahahahaha his top stretch goal is to turn his terrible anime game into a terrible porn anime game. For 500k, I'd draw my characters having sex. It's clearly a joke tier regardless. Edit: Doesn't look his art has gotten any better in a decade. Maybe even worse?
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Jun 19, 2013 04:30
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Landrobot posted:Sucklord toy figures - shaped like M.U.S.C.L.E. This guy was on Bravo's Work of Art: Next Great Artist and was pretty amusing to watch, if entirely underwhelming with some of the stuff he created. I don't think it's completely unfair to call him an action figure-obsessed, man-child version of Andy Warhol. Though I do love his Jerry Saltz action figure. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NNbXRP7ZHQE
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Jun 19, 2013 04:32
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Me in Reverse posted:Here is a list of over 50 WICKED TRICK MOVE VIDEOS that I will reference in this BOOK.  With such moves as: -impossible immortal crush -yellow emperor's chopstick strike -impressive goldfish spirit -resplendent foo-dog penetration -emasculating ghost slash -destructive hummingbird neck-snap -excellent buddha essence Clearly my teenage kung-fu wizard, secret pop-star identity, coming of age story is going to be better.
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Jun 19, 2013 04:34
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Unguided posted:http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/fredrin/megatokyo-visual-novel-game It's been ten years since I stopped reading Megatokyo. I can't believe a) he's still beating this poo poo into the ground, b) his art hasn't changed. Jesus Christ, it's like he outright refuses to improve. edit: Are those seriously the same characters from around 2003? As in, no main characters have been introduced? How much time has passed in his Tokyo, 'cos I remember that 'manga' moved at a snail's pace. Back when I read it (it was highschool, I was a weeaboo, I repent) at least it seemed like there was some sort of improvement going on. New characters were introduced every now and again and the art got..."better". autism ZX spectrum has a new favorite as of 05:01 on Jun 19, 2013 |
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Jun 19, 2013 04:58
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Sigma-X posted:I would probably sell mine. I wanted to give them lots of money, getting the pillow was kind of secondary. Thinking your internet meme pillow case (ha) is worth something should make you re-evaluate your life
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Jun 19, 2013 07:27
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Nubile Hillock posted:It's been ten years since I stopped reading Megatokyo. I can't believe a) he's still beating this poo poo into the ground, b) his art hasn't changed. I remember reading it in high school, noticing they started focusing less on videogame jokes and more on weird romance stories involving high school kids. I flipped back a few months and realized he had kicked the other guy off his comic with a "quit the comic, or I'll stop drawing" style ultimatum. Way classy.
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Jun 19, 2013 13:35
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Croccers posted:Pssh, only 50? I have five hundred
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Jun 19, 2013 14:27
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GigaPeon posted:I remember reading it in high school, noticing they started focusing less on videogame jokes and more on weird romance stories involving high school kids. I flipped back a few months and realized he had kicked the other guy off his comic with a "quit the comic, or I'll stop drawing" style ultimatum. Way classy. I don't know why I remember this piece of trivia but I recall there was a joke about how the strip would look if just one of them was working on it, and the dude who still does had some weird dating sim thing going on. Aren't the main characters self inserts too? Did he keep around the self insert of his former partner?  I can't believe this is still going, why won't it die.
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Jun 19, 2013 15:02
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Gackt posted:http://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1489592731/storytellers-the-series From a few pages back, but uggghh, the character names all sound so forced.
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Jun 19, 2013 15:36
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PHIZ KALIFA posted:Guys, shut it down, shut it all down, I've discovered the Worst Kickstarter. Whelp it looks like that social justice warriors got ahold of this kickstarter and are not personally advocating everyone report it to get it banned http://jezebel.com/redditors-pua-kickstarter-project-recommends-sexual-as-514264056 If it does can we finally call Shitstarter hypocrites for caving into one mob mentality but letting "fund muh daughter"-starter go through?
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Jun 19, 2013 15:45
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There is some l33t speak in that Megatokyo kickstarter page. In the year of our lord 2013, someone is unironically using it. It's not just his art that's perpetually stuck in 2003, I guess!
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Jun 19, 2013 16:12
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OrganizedInsanity posted:Whelp it looks like that social justice warriors got ahold of this kickstarter and are not personally advocating everyone report it to get it banned Hmmm, the PUA book advocates sexual assault, while the begging mother is tacky. 6 of one, half a dozen of the other really.
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Jun 19, 2013 16:20
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OrganizedInsanity posted:Whelp it looks like that social justice warriors got ahold of this kickstarter and are not personally advocating everyone report it to get it banned I hope the kickstarter goes through and this jackass gets his money. Why? Because then we can finally say that kickstarter profited off of Reddit's rape instruction manual. Hopefully, if people talk about rape profiteering enough, kickstarter might actually start enforcing their own loving rules and regu--Hahahaha I can't believe I almost made it through that sentence. Congratulations, kickstarter! In a few short hours, you'll have officially endorsed sexual assault by your trademark inaction.
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Jun 19, 2013 17:00
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Noni posted:I hope the kickstarter goes through and this jackass gets his money. It just ended, over 800% successful.
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