Jack Trades posted:

I wish someone wouldn't stop doing my laundry.

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

My goal in life is to become wealthy enough where I do not need to do laundry.

Jack Trades posted:

I wish someone wouldn't stop doing my laundry.

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

My goal in life is to become wealthy enough where I do not need to do laundry.

Rick Rickshaw posted:

Does this mean you will pay someone to do it for you, or you don't have to work and therefore don't have to be presentable?

Rick Rickshaw posted:

Does this mean you will pay someone to do it for you, or you don't have to work and therefore don't have to be presentable?

quote:

I'm hiding in the bathroom right now. He's asleep. We were having sex all weekend. The last time was kind of rough, so I guess he kick-started my cycle. I'm a week early. I woke up an hour ago due to cramps and as I got inside the bathroom I noticed there was blood on the back of my pyjamas. WHAT SHOULD I DO? I tiptoed inside the bedroom to check if I got any on his bed, and I did. It's not much, but I know he'll see it when he wakes up in the morning.

If he were a boyfriend, I would tell him no problem, but he's not. We have only been having sex for a couple of weeks, and before that we were casual friends.
I have to tell him soon. I can't just leave without saying anything. So what should I say? How should I say it? I'm usually pretty good about stuff like this and I usually have no shame when it comes to bodily functions but this is bad. I stained his white sheets. This is the first time one of us has slept over after sex. What do I do, reddit?

TL;DR - I got my period after a session of rough sex. It's on the sheets where I was sleeping. I'm in the bathroom freaking out. He's asleep. I know I have to tell him, but I don't know how. We haven't been sleeping together for very long.

(Update: He woke up all of a sudden, and I just told him. He was really cool about it! Thanks to everyone who left a comment.)

quote:

My [28F] fiance [31M] wants to have a LOTR wedding.

I can get too wordy so I will try and be clear.

As the title says: my fiance wants to have a LOTR wedding.

He never mentioned it prior to us becoming engaged.

I think it is unfair because I am not bringing any of my hobbies or interests into the wedding and I feel he should do the same.

I am not a bridezilla and I want every step of our wedding to be planned with equal input.

A lot of my relatives are old and have no idea what LOTR is. I think it would be disrespectful to our guests to make them dress up.

I hate this idea so much and I have been very considerate in wording my disagreement to the idea but now my fiance is sulking because he says he has always wanted a LOTR wedding and it is his dream wedding.

How can I make him see it is a bad idea?

I found the movies very hard to follow and apart from being able to name a few major characters I know nothing about LOTR. Every time we watch it I try my best to understand but it's too hard for me to follow.

tl;dr: Fiance wants a LOTR wedding.

EDIT: I didn't add some details that comments have pointed out to me as important.

I have made the following compromise offers:

His choice of location so it can be in a elfsie/mythical type location with forrest.

Our bands will be inscribed with a quote

(He doesn't know) but my gift to him for the wedding will be a package tour of LOTR location

54 40 or gently caress posted:

James Deen is a professional porn star who chose to be in those films. It is goddamn creepy to save someone's facebook photos and collect videos/gifs of someone looking vaguely like them to beat off to it.

loquacius posted:

Charles, I would like you to conduct a little experiment for me. Decide which of your girlfriend's friends is the hottest one, then "accidentally" let slip to your girlfriend that you are attracted to her. Observe the results. If she responds poorly, tell her that if she "just can't let it go" that you might be attracted to another person, she should sever and save you the annoyance of dealing with her. Post a trip report when you're done. Thanks

like, I'm pretty sure the result of saying something like this even without the existence of a hidden digital shrine to them would be relationship-ending to most people

Bonzo posted:

I (21/F) got my period on my fwb's (22/M) bed HELP


Is it me or does 21 seem a bit old to be this immature about periods? It's not like she poo poo the bed or something.

Gumbel2Gumbel posted:

My goal in life is to become wealthy enough where I do not need to do laundry.

quote:

TMI Warning
So. My future FIL. He lives in my home with me, my partner, and our child for a fraction of the cost of rent - he pays for cable -and he's a perfectly fine person in general. He spends the summer at his beach house and the wintry months at home with us.

Now, I struggle with severe PTSD and depression, so housework is a process, but I'm in weekly cognative therapy and on medication to help, and it has. I've gotten into a groove with housework and self-care and it's awesome.

But suddenly he's back and my progress is nothing. I graduated to having a side of the sink free and clear, with just a couple of dishes in the other side, but he comes home and talks about how he told a neighbor that I'm a poor housekeeper but a great cook! And then spread dishes into both sides of the sink, misplaced my drying towel, and left a bunch of condiments of the table.
Cool. Whatever. I'll discuss it in therapy.

But he's taken up doing my laundry again. I've told him not to.

I have several health conditions, one of which is fecal and urinary incontinence. The other, less serious issue, is the fact that I have a heavy menstrual cycle due to birth control, which is a new thing, so it's completely out of control and I'm struggling to manage it because I used to be a light bleeder. But whatever, that's what period panties are for, right?

He mentioned, in a laundromat, that he would never get my underwear clear of blood stains. I wanted to die. I'm really careful about my 'accidents', but I'm petrified now. When I have an 'accident' now, I just throw out my underwear instead of trying to clean them because I don't want it mentioned. It's already humiliating enough that I'm a 20 something who shits herself sometimes.

What do I do? I'm so embarrassed, stressed, and feel that my wants and needs are being completely ignored.

TL;DR: I don't want my FIL to do my laundry.

EDIT: Guise, I'm not asking him to leave because he does my laundry. There is no malicious intent behind his words, just a big mouth and a little bit of a shakey grasp on social etiquette concerning women and their bodily functions. He raised two boys, they can be very frank in terms of these things.
FFIL loves me, there is no question about that.

Charles Get-Out posted:

Man she didn't tell him anything, it's like a totally different situation. It's cool to be attracted to people you know even if they are your SO's friends, it's not cool to be insensitive and say poo poo you know your SO won't like.

Dude's annoying cause he's a snoop and came into this knowledge on his own and decides to get pissy about it to the internet. Girl's weird cause she has an obsession. If she had been like "hey I wanna gently caress your friend and here's my jill folder to prove it" it would be a completely different matter.

(Aside, but I've mentioned to guys I've dated if I find their friends or other dudes attractive and they haven't really cared, but maybe gay dudes are less sensitive or I've dated chill people? idk)

Chomp8645 posted:

Complex, hard to follow narrative: Lord of the Rings.

Zulily Zoetrope posted:

There's a huge difference between "This person is hot/attractive" and "I would totally gently caress and/or fantasize about loving your buddy Steve," at least in my experience. The former can definitely be discussed in a healthy relationship, while I wouldn't blame someone for being put off by the latter.

Gaunab posted:

Gaunab posted:

Charles Get-Out posted:

Totally agree, but Loquacius' hypothetical was telling your SO you're attracted to their friend only and I specifically called out in my post that it would be different if the girl outright said she wanted to gently caress the dude she's obsessing over.

loquacius posted:

Dude, no, that's not the point. It's not about what you choose to tell them, that's why I said "'accidentally' let slip" rather than "schedule a meeting in their Google calendar, call it to order with a gavel, present them with a notarized proclamation, and keep minutes". It's about how if this is something your SO learns, for whatever reason, they are not going to take it well under any circumstances. You can't really blame him for being jealous. Any one of us and anyone any one of us will ever date would react the same way.

(sorry for being heteronormative tho)

Tiny Deer posted:

Re: porn folder girlfriend.

That is crazy as hell. Straight up crazy. She's saving tiny 6 second clips of dudes who look like their acquaintance. Her folder of porn is just this guy. This is a person she knows and apparently exclusively jacks it to.

That's set dressing for a serial killer's house, is what that is. It's the thing noted in headlines like Kidnapper Kept Folder of Pictures of Victim, Police Reveal and Collage of Victim's Face Tattooed on Assailant's Body--Tattoo Also a Giant rear end Tree.

Obviously this is real life and she's not going to lock this dude in her sex dungeon, but drat.

Charles Get-Out posted:

I think we're running in circles and I know I'm bad with words so being clear my position is harboring a sexual fixation is weird, snooping is weird, and I think the dude should be able to manage things and feelings without crying to reddit. My annoying comment was directed at him not being able to work through this like an adult.

quote:

I'm pretty much the black sheep of the family, always have been.

I have three siblings: an older sister (33F), younger sister (23F) and brother (19M). We all have a family WhatsApp thread that we use to keep in touch, because I live about two hours away from them and don't see them often (although I always have to visit them - they never visit me). They all live in the same city - my hometown.

The thread contains all four siblings (or did), and their partners. Being in the family thread was important to me because I've never felt like as much as part of the family as the others, and they all used to have a thread without me when they all had iPhones and I didn't. Eventually we got a WhatsApp thread and then I was allowed in.

A week ago, I went to visit them all. Prior to that, I'd changed my hair colour and posted a picture in the thread. It wasn't the most flattering pic - I didn't have makeup on, I was just excited to show them the new colour. They were quite mean about it and I was upset. I screenshotted their comments and showed my two best friends, and asked if I was being oversensitive. They were shocked by how nasty the comments from my own family were.

The comments continued when I visited, not just about my hair but all sorts of things about me. My sister could tell I was upset and pushed and pushed and pushed until I told her what was wrong (I even said "period pains" in the hope it'd stop the probing but no). Eventually I said she was being quite nasty, and gave examples, and she went nuts and said she was "sick of my bullshit" and "the family doesn't revolve around you" (hi, no one's ever visited me, I KNOW THAT). My partner and I left, and went back to my mum's where I was staying. Whereupon the argument basically started again with my mum and brother, who'd also been mean about my hair.

During the course of this argument, I mentioned that I'd screenshotted the nasty comments to sanity-check with my friends whether they were mean. Nothing was made of this at the time - I was just explaining why I felt the comments were out of line. My mum said I should have worn makeup, I said I didn't think I needed to with my own family, she said I need to moreso with them than anyone else (?!). She also said "well of course your FRIENDS say it's nice, they're going to say that, they're your FRIENDS." Which is weird because isn't it usually your mum who's supposed to think nice things about you when no one else does?

Anyway, the argument was all resolved and forgotten, until exactly a week later when my little brother, who started the thread, removed me and my partner from it without a word. He wouldn't answer texts or calls so I called mum who was with him (he has no job and lives at home) and she said it was because I'd "taken it outside the family" by screenshotting and she thought he'd done the right thing.

Now I know it's ridiculous to be upset about a whatsapp thread at the age of 30. But it meant something to me when they added me to it, and now they're all talking without me like before I got an iPhone. I feel slighted and like they're basically saying they can say whatever they like and if I tell anyone about it, they'll cut me off...?

Am I in the wrong here? Is screenshotting a group thread really that bad? I didn't post it on twitter or facebook or anything, I just sent it to my two best friends in my group chat with them.

Should I be apologising?

tl;dr: My brother kicked me out of our family whatsapp thread because I screenshotted their nasty comments about my hair and asked my friends if they were out of line. I feel like they're basically saying I'm not in the family anymore. Was I wrong to screenshot?

WampaLord posted:

Speaking of crazy:

My [30F] family won't let me be in the family WhatsApp thread because I once screenshotted it

loquacius posted:

like, do you tell the guy, or

Bamabalacha posted:

Anyone want to take bets on what kind of hideous rainbow vomit she splashed on her head?

EDIT: found the thread and it's "GO TO R/RAISEDBYNARCISSISTS AND SEVER!" all the way down, when I'd be willing to bet that a) the post was exaggerated as hell and b) that women is probably also annoying. Not sure why this little dysfunction tidbit is stuck in my craw!

Gaunab posted:

I guess it depends on if you want to believe the op, but if you do then her family sounds horrible.

Bonzo posted:

I (21/F) got my period on my fwb's (22/M) bed HELP


Is it me or does 21 seem a bit old to be this immature about periods? It's not like she poo poo the bed or something.

AnElegantPeacock posted:

Some dudes are irrationally terrified of period blood. She's probably encountered one before.

Zelder posted:

Lol if you don't keep an excel spreadsheet of everyone you wanna gently caress

Cyberpope v2 posted:

Sounds like he's the ultimate idiot who doesn't get signals, and she's the ultimate at passive aggressive playing hard to get. She wants to look at his stuff as an excuse to get close to him and make something happen. He's just too much of an idiot to realize.

Jenner posted:

Not way. That is just way too loving chessmaster.

What is the problem with just telling someone you like them? Sigh.

Chichevache posted:

I don't think you can call yourself a man if you don't have your red wings.

Bamabalacha posted:

Anyone want to take bets on what kind of hideous rainbow vomit she splashed on her head?

EDIT: found the thread and it's "GO TO R/RAISEDBYNARCISSISTS AND SEVER!" all the way down, when I'd be willing to bet that a) the post was exaggerated as hell and b) that women is probably also annoying. Not sure why this little dysfunction tidbit is stuck in my craw!

P-Mack posted:

Don't be like me and use a word doc, you'll miss out on the sorting options and have a harder time exporting to third party gently caress tracking programs.

HardDiskD posted:

My (19M) sister (21F) is suddenly avoiding our friendly neighbours (32F & 30M) even though we all get along very well. I don't know what happened and she's not telling me the truth.

quote:

Is it worth it? I (26m) and gf (25f) had a break after our 2 year relationship and she slept with her coworker.

So my ex and I broke up for 2 weeks and we got back together tonight. I been staying with a friend so I left after we talked. She told me before I left that she hooked up with one of her coworkers and said the details of the hook up would upset me. I know she's into a lot of stuff so I can only imagine how it went down. She also told me she chose this person (who's not attractive, short and kinda repulsive) because she knew he'd be rough, just like how she likes. This is a problem because I could never be rough enough for her. This pained me deeply. I told her I needed a day to let that settle. I also hooked up but I just had a casual blow job from someone so I feel like it's not the same.

Now I know we weren't together at the time and she didn't betray me cuz we were broken up. Now that we're officially on again, I can't stop imagining her and this repulsive person, his dick in her mouth when I kiss her, how he must have dominated her in a way I couldn't. I just can't stop imagining it. I want to be with her but this imagery is burned inside my mind.

What should I do? Is this something that we can get past? Telling her how much I disliked that she did that and how it's gonna have a lasting effect has made her feel bad. I want our relationship to be great again but the thought of her being dominated by someone else just... Hurts me deeply. She knows about the blow job and isn't as upset with me as I am with her (I know it's hypocritical but it's how I feel) . I forgive her but I just can't stop imagining her hookup.

TL;DR gf slept with coworker during our 2 week break and I can't get over it.

AnElegantPeacock posted:

Some dudes are irrationally terrified of period blood. She's probably encountered one before.

Chomp8645 posted:

Complex, hard to follow narrative: Lord of the Rings.