/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

bone app the teeth: May 14, 2008

WampaLord posted:

I dunno, I think the idea that the girl's damaged goods just because she hosed his friend is stupid. There's literally nothing different about her from when he was interested in her.

getting rejected and being the fall back choice is a great start to a relationship.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:35

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# ? May 9, 2024 13:41

china bot: Sep 7, 2014; you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX; Plaster Town Cop

WampaLord posted:

I dunno, I think the idea that the girl's damaged goods just because she hosed his friend is stupid. There's literally nothing different about her from when he was interested in her.

"I was wrong, she shot me down. No big deal I move on, one of my friends starts sleeping with her and as is par for his course dumps her after about a month. She then tries to hit me up again and this time I reject her, she flips her poo poo because she say's I'm sexist for rejecting her because she had sex with one of my friends. This was not the reason"

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:35

Adventure Pigeon: Nov 8, 2005; I am a master storyteller.

Eh, the adult thing to do after someone says they're not interested in you is to move on. How she behaved after he said he wasn't interested just shows his decision was the right one.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:37

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

china bot posted:

"I was wrong, she shot me down. No big deal I move on, one of my friends starts sleeping with her and as is par for his course dumps her after about a month. She then tries to hit me up again and this time I reject her, she flips her poo poo because she say's I'm sexist for rejecting her because she had sex with one of my friends. This was not the reason"

Yea, he says that on the Internet so as to appeal cool and enlightened, but you know it's part of the reason.

bone app the teeth posted:

getting rejected and being the fall back choice is a great start to a relationship.

Who said anything about relationship? You can try one date at first.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:37

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

WampaLord posted:

There's literally nothing different about her from when he was interested in her.

yes there is. the difference is that now he knows she's not really interested in him. it's usually a bad idea to try to start a relationship with someone who isn't really interested in you

WampaLord posted:

Yea, he says that on the Internet so as to appeal cool and enlightened, but you know it's part of the reason.

ok i guess if we're just making things up then i wouldn't date someone with scraggly teeth either. nasty

boner confessor fucked around with this message at 19:40 on Nov 16, 2016

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:38

china bot: Sep 7, 2014; you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX; Plaster Town Cop

WampaLord posted:

Yea, he says that on the Internet so as to appeal cool and enlightened, but you know it's part of the reason.

You might as well also presume that she turned him down the first time because he asked her out at gun point

this is "death of the author" the thread, motherfucker

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:40

stump collector: May 28, 2007

i respect him for not forcing a relationship because she wanted it

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:41

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

WampaLord posted:

Yea, he says that on the Internet so as to appeal cool and enlightened, but you know it's part of the reason.

Who said anything about relationship? You can try one date at first.

Why would he be obligated to give her a date? Nobody needs an excuse to not date someone, you weirdo.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:42

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Leon Einstein posted:

Why would he be obligated to give her a date? Nobody needs an excuse to not date someone, you weirdo.

Where did I claim he was obligated? Calm your poo poo.

I'm willing to accept that I'm wrong and that her post-rejection reaction is enough to put her in the "crazy" pile, honestly I just wanted to argue for the sake of arguing. Also the situation reminded me of the girl from Funny People who went on a pretty cool rant about how it was weird that the dude was no longer into her just cause she hosed his friend.

E: VVV "used up psycho" okay then

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:45

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

WampaLord posted:

Yea, he says that on the Internet so as to appeal cool and enlightened, but you know it's part of the reason.

Who said anything about relationship? You can try one date at first.

Since you're not taking the author at his word, I'm going to do the same with you: stop projecting your weird insecurities onto the redditer, you used up psycho.

Edit

And it isn't a one way street. I'm sure plenty of women aren't interested in sleeping with their friend's ex-boyfriends.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:45

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

A good question to ask is why was she not interested in him before and interested in him later

was it
(a) he suddenly and inexplicably became more attractive, perhaps with Captain America's Super-Soldier Serum
(b) she isn't really interested in him now either but wants to feel better after the other guy dumped her
(c) she wants to use him to make the other guy jealous
or
(d) she already knew she wanted to get with the other guy instead and thought that getting involved with more than one person in the same friend group would complicate things

It probably wasn't (a), he's totally in the right if it's (b) or (c), and she's a massive hypocrite if it's (d)

But at any rate, if someone turns you down for a date, it's never the correct course of action to "argue the point". He didn't do it when she turned him down, and she doesn't really gain anything by doing it now. What is her goal here? Should he say "You're right, it is totally sexist of me to not date you, let's begin a healthy and stable relationship now"?

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:47

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Feeling differently after finding out you're a consolation prize is not the same as avoiding sloppy seconds.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:47

ranbo das: Oct 16, 2013

WampaLord posted:

I dunno, I think the idea that the girl's damaged goods just because she hosed his friend is stupid. There's literally nothing different about her from when he was interested in her.

There's also literally nothing different about him from when she was not interested in him.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:48

Ride The Gravitron: May 2, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

Leon Einstein posted:

Feeling differently after finding out you're a consolation prize is not the same as avoiding sloppy seconds.

No you don't understand he's literally sexist pig for not immediately being grateful to have this goddesses attention despite the fact that she's clearly only using him for a rebound.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 19:58

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

That mom should fill her kid's iPod with cool poo poo, like The Smiths, Morrissey, and Brand New. Throw in Mindless Self Indulgence, Iron Maiden, first wave punk, new wave 80s, classical, folk and country, old rear end blues and jazz, old and new hip hop, r&b, gently caress it, some bluegrass. Coheed, Rush, Bowie, Beatles, Elvis (The King and Costello) some solid house anthems and a bunch of other poo poo. Then be like, explore, try listening on random. Let me know what you like, or want to hear more of. Here's some Marvin Gaye and some Immortal Technique, now go play outside!

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:00

loquacius: Oct 21, 2008

Ride The Gravitron posted:

No you don't understand he's literally sexist pig for not immediately being grateful to have this goddesses attention despite the fact that she's clearly only using him for a rebound.

Feminism means I can gently caress whoever I want and they're not allowed to say no, right

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:02

JFairfax: Oct 23, 2008; by FactsAreUseless

Immortal Technique is not a very good rapper and has a song called Bush Brought Down the Towers

e/ I mean his heart is in the right place, but goddamn having been at a show and seeing people chanting that along at the chorus was loving lol worthy in the extreme

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:03

Lunchmeat Larry: Nov 3, 2012

JFairfax posted:

Immortal Technique is not a very good rapper and has a song called Bush Brought Down the Towers

e/ I mean his heart is in the right place, but goddamn having been at a show and seeing people chanting that along at the chorus was loving lol worthy in the extreme

on the other hand he bullied Lin Manuel-Miranda in high school which is hilarious

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:07

china bot: Sep 7, 2014; you listen HERE pal
SAY GOODBYE TO TELEPHONE SEX; Plaster Town Cop

I'm Immortal Technique and I'm here to say
steel beams 9/11 cuck & I am gay

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:11

Stunt_enby: Feb 6, 2010; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

immortal technique sucks poo poo

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:41

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

Not very funny but geez:

quote:

So, let me start from the beginning.

I met this guy at a bar, and we hit it off almost immediately. Things moved really quickly. We would see each other every day since the day we met. He told me he loved me within the first few weeks of knowing him. I also caught him in a few lies, he first lied about his age to me twice, saying he felt insecure about how old he really was. Then he came out and told me he used to be a porn star when he was 19-21, and he had slept with a total of over 400 people, which I looked up, and it was true. He told me how he was still married and in the process of getting a divorce. And lastly, he told me about his business and within one month, he asked me to move in with him. I accepted everything he told me, and still stayed with him asking only for honesty going forward and moved in with him.

Things started out great. Although while living with him, I noticed he would drink everyday, and he would do a ton of drugs. It didn't take long for me to piece together that he was an alcoholic and a drug addict. We started talking about doing the Appalachian Trail together, and accordingly he sold almost all of his furniture for money, sold his business, and even told his parents that he was going to leave to do the trail. He was very insecure when we first met, and if I would have to stay in late for work, or if I took too long doing things at my parents house he would accuse me of sleeping with other guys, so he asked me to quit my job and promised to take care of me. I rejected the offer, until he continued to try convincing me, and saying that we were going to do the trail regardless so it was pointless for me to work. I eventually accepted it, and quit my job. I met his parents and he met mine, but my parents automatically told me that they did not trust him.

We ended up not doing the trial and went to Europe instead where we started to charge everything to my card, because we were waiting for the money from his sold business to come in. During this whole time, he was very affectionate, loving, we had sex like three times a day, we even got matching tattoos on our chest and we would get into really heated arguments which would go really bad, but then he would apologize and tell me he loved me, was lucky to have me and how afraid he was of losing me. Most of the arguments we had would happen while he was drunk, and he would act out like a child. Storming off, or making a scene until he came to his senses and apologized to me.

When we got back, things started to slowly nose dive. We stayed with his parents until the money from his sold business finally came in, but it wasn't anywhere close to what he said he would be making. However, he still made small payments here and there to my credit card. His penis got weirdly inflamed, and we went to get tested but all test results came back negative, so we didn't have any stds, but it put a huge dent into our sex lives. He also stopped being as affectionate and as all over me as he used to be. He always wanted to hangout with his friends and get drunk or do drugs. I also didn't see any progress with his divorce although he would never bring up his husband once, no matter how drunk or incoherent he was.

This drove me to being more insecure. I found myself getting jealous around his friends when they were touchy, and his roommate whom he had made out with twice. I was getting frustrated with the amount of money I was spending and the little amount that was being paid to my card. And when I asked about the process of the divorce, he would tell me that it was coming along, and reassured me by telling me that he never really loved his husband, hated having sex with him, only stayed with him because he was covered fully medically, and how he would walk all over him. This, however, made me feel even more insecure about his intentions with me. Although he had told me several times he had never loved anybody the way he loves me, traveled out of the country with anybody he's been with or gave up what he had so quickly for anybody he's dated.

He ended up getting Adderall re-prescribed to him by some shady doctor and started taking really high dosages and mixing it with liquor, and I started to notice a change in his personality. He would become extremely affectionate and loving while on the high of the drug, but distant and cold while he was off it. It continued like this for a few days, until our last fight.

Again, he took a huge dosage of Adderall throughout the day, and he started drinking, his roommate also joined us. I noticed his roommate was being a bit flirty, and I couldn't help but keep thinking about how they had made out so it put me in a bad mood. This was when my bf lost it and embarrassed me in front of his roommate asking what he thinks I saw and I got evasive and walked over to the room to leave them hanging out. My bf ended up barging in the room cussing at me and saying I've accused him for the last time of doing something behind my back, and left me in the room alone for an hour as he kept hanging out with his roommate. I had hoped that this would give him time to cool off, but he just came back in and kept screaming at me, packing all my stuff, and told me to leave. I told him I had too much to drink and couldn't make an hour drive to my parent's house and risk getting a DUI, and he said it wasn't his problem. He then made a video of me crying and saying everything he pays for that I don't (which isn't true, because everything is charged to my credit card), and threatened to post it on fb and show all his friends. He then broke up with me and called the cops on me to have me forcefully removed, and one of the cops even apologized to me and said how his ex gf was an alcoholic and how it doesn't get any better and that I should move on and not look back. It didn't end there though, he texted my parents a ton of lies, saying I was a drug addict and how he had to hide the Adderall from me and that I needed help, all in an attempt to make himself look good.

My parents, however, think he never loved me and was a con artist who was trying to get rid of me since we got back from Europe, and knew he couldn't pay that amount back. I don't know what to believe at this point. He refuses to admit he is an alcoholic and an addict, I'm stuck in so much debt, and he doesn't even feel bad for what he did to me that night and said he doesn't think it would be possible to work things out after what happened. We lasted a total of five months. What should I do?

TL;DR: My ex-boyfriend put me in over $20,000 in debt, but was overall a good guy. He never cheated or talked about his husband, whom he is getting a divorce with. Was he a con artist or are these just traits of an alcoholic/addict? What do you think I should do?

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:54

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

stump collector posted:

i'd much rather smell like poo poo out of spite than spend 5-10 minutes cleaning something. such is the way of the bushido

Guessing if the whole place smells like poo poo and piss, the cat is probably going elsewhere because the idiot owners don't clean its box. I say gently caress it, if they don't want to do the bare minimum to clean up and use the roomie's weed habit against him, then take the cat to a shelter and dump the litterbox. At least the cat will get cared for and potentially adopted by someone that knows what the gently caress they're doing.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 20:55

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:

Not very funny but geez:

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:01

P-Mack: Nov 10, 2007

"overall a good guy"

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:07

monkeytennis: Apr 26, 2007; Toilet Rascal

P-Mack posted:

"overall a good guy"

Only good guy in that story is the cop who said 'sever'. Jfc.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:14

54 40 or fuck: Jan 4, 2012; No Yanda's allowed

what's so bad about a guy who destroys your credit, skeeves out your parents, abuses substances, lies and emotionally abuses you? High standards ITT

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:15

boner confessor: Apr 25, 2013; by R. Guyovich

54 40 or gently caress posted:

what's so bad about a guy who destroys your credit, skeeves out your parents, abuses substances, lies and emotionally abuses you? High standards ITT

they had sex three times a day before his dick swole up like a clown's balloon

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:17

Dreddout: Oct 1, 2015; You must stay drunk on writing so reality cannot destroy you.

Lunchmeat Larry posted:

oh lol woops

2016 encapsulated in three words!

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:21

Gaunab: Feb 13, 2012; LUFTHANSA YOU FUCKING DICKWEASEL

quote:

My boyfriend [24] made me [20] cry in public last night

My boyfriend [24] and I [20] have been dating for 11 months. Last night we were both in our own cars driving to a restaurant to eat dinner. While we were driving to the restaurant we were on the phone because I was following his car and he didn't want me to get lost. When someone cut off his car he screamed "what the f*** n****!". I ended up getting mad cause I absolutely hate it when he uses the n word and I have already been asking him to stop since the beginning of our relationship (atleast when he is with me and I know it slips out sometimes so I forgive him for those if he apologizes). However, this time he does not apologize. I start to get upset and when we get out of our car he wanted to hold my hand but I didn't want to hold his. He teases me and doesn't understand why I'm mad. So I tell him cause he said the N word. Moving on, he forcible drags me by my fist (my way of not holding his hand) along to the resturant but stops by the store next door cause he saw his friends. At this point, I forced myself to be a little happier cause I don't want his friends to see me moody. After that we finally get to the restaurant and I sit across from him. He continues to tease me, he takes away my phone when I'm using it to ignore him, he start joking and taking pictures of my sad face and texts them to me. Those things I don't care about but, once he took out his phone he said "hold up let me put this on facebook live, why were you crying?" I started crying in the restaurant. It felt scary like I was being bullied. He probably didn't record anything but the thought that the camera lens could had been recording that awkward embarrassing moment made me cry. He said sorry. He told me to go to the bathroom. I did. I came back out. He started talking. I started to cry again. He told me to go to the bathroom again. I did. I came back out and told him not to talk. We ate dinner in silence and left. When we were walking out he dragged me to him car when I was walking towards mine. In his car, he teased me and I start bawling my eyes out cause I was just so upset at that point. When I'm crying he drove me to my car but saw his friends coming out the store next door, he honked his horn to say hi. They were walking along the side of the car I was in so the embarrassed me with tears all over my face had to slouch down in my chair and cover my face. Once I got home I started a text message conversation trying to tell him he was going too far with the teasing tonight. He told me he was just joking and if I wanted to cry like that to do it at home and it wasn't the first time I did something like that. My reply "right back at you" I told him it felt like bullying and he ended the conversation by saying he was going to sleep. Can you give me your opinion on what happened in this situation, both from his perspective and mine? Should I not have cried? Was he being too much? Etc. Its already the next day and we texted each other good morning like nothing happened. I haven't texted anything else yet.

tl;dr My boyfriend and I went to eat dinner. We drove in separate cars and were on the phone with each other. I heard him say the N word (someone cut him off) and got mad. He didn't apologize so I stayed upset. At the restaurant he teased me, took pictures of my sad face, and jokingly start to suposivly record me on facebook live. I started crying cause I felt like it was too much and like it was bullying. Once we got home we started texting. I told him he was going to far. His reply was he was joking and for me not to crying in public like that and it wasn't the first time I did that. My comeback "right back at you" (this was not the first time he made me cry in public). He ended the conversation and it is the next day. We text each other good morning like nothing happened.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:22

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

loving teenagers

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:34

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

That's the point though. You have to put some legitimately bad music with terrible opinions in there. Like put some Hollywood Undead and Insane Clown Posse on that iPod and use the Rod of Correction if your spawn starts jamming on it.

E: oh man, I forgot all the cool chick singers I like. Tori Amos, Bj�rk, PJ Harvey, Portishead, Garbage, Hole...Placebo...

Pvt.Scott fucked around with this message at 21:38 on Nov 16, 2016

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:35

Khorne: May 1, 2002

Leon Einstein posted:

loving teenagers

There's no way she didn't add 5 years to each of their ages.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:35

WampaLord: Jan 14, 2010

Is breaking up really really hard? I've never had to do it, so that's the only reason I have in my head as to why so many people are staying with these loving terrible people.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:44

Pvt.Scott: Feb 16, 2007; What God wants, God gets, God help us all

WampaLord posted:

Is breaking up really really hard? I've never had to do it, so that's the only reason I have in my head as to why so many people are staying with these loving terrible people.

Yes. Loss and rejection can cause extreme emotional pain and even causes physical pain. Heartbreak is literal. People tend to avoid discomfort.

E: your brain is a strange and wondrous meat computer. Physical pain due to severance in order to make you averse to ending relationships is nature's way of encouraging you to stay together to have and raise children. Once you experience it a few times you don't want to continue the trend.

Pvt.Scott fucked around with this message at 22:03 on Nov 16, 2016

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:57

AmiYumi: Oct 10, 2005; I FORGOT TO HAIL KING TORG

Khorne posted:

There's no way she didn't add 5 years to each of their ages.

Or subtract, given the rest of this thread.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 21:58

Jeffrey of YOSPOS: Dec 22, 2005; GET LOSE, YOU CAN'T COMPARE WITH MY POWERS

WampaLord posted:

Is breaking up really really hard? I've never had to do it, so that's the only reason I have in my head as to why so many people are staying with these loving terrible people.

People fail to sever as a rule for a reason. It's really hard for there to be a person who some part of you really likes and cares for while some other part of you knows you shouldn't see.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 22:01

Nancy: Nov 23, 2005; Young Orc

WampaLord posted:

Is breaking up really really hard? I've never had to do it, so that's the only reason I have in my head as to why so many people are staying with these loving terrible people.

It's actually kind of difficult considering all of the societal and emotional baggage people bring into relationships. Also a lot of these posters likely have co-dependent tendencies and wrap themselves up in their partners enough to not see the damage until it's too late.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 22:04

Coolness Averted: Feb 20, 2007; oh don't worry, I can't smell asparagus piss, it's in my DNA

GO HOGG WILD!
🐗🐗🐗🐗🐗

So it's not on r/relationships (yet!) but I saw a shitshow explode over the past week I wouldn't be surprised to see pop up there.

If he posts it'll be "My girlfriend (21F) dumped me, got me (28M) evicted from my home and stole my friends stuff and money what can I do?" and she might post the follow up "My roommate/ex (28m) got black out drunk and smashed our apartment and everything in it, now I'm (21F) in trouble for a 'self remedy' eviction!"

It really is a bingo card of bad choices made. A 20 year old following her 27 year old boyfriend across the country, addiction, choosing to live with an ex to try and win them back, and punching a guitar.

Should I post the details or is that too off topic? Since it's technically not on reddit?

# ? Nov 16, 2016 22:15

gentle pete: Feb 21, 2015; by Nyc_Tattoo

Not relationships but

quote:

(Virginia) My cousin is an absolute idiot. He played dead as a prank on emergency personnel. What kind of charges could he be facing?

Basically, my cousin (16) decided it would be funny to play dead. He put some foam around his mouth and laid on the ground until his mother found him. She called 911 in a frenzy, an ambulance and the fire dept responded. My cousin continued to play dead as they started to work the code. He only gave up the game by laughing when they put some kind of breathing mask on him, I guess?

He figured it would be funny like an episode of Punk'd or something, but you can imagine how the firefighters reacted. They contacted the police and an officer came to deal with my cousin. He wasn't arrested right there, but the officer said that charges may come down in the near future.

How much trouble is my idiot cousin in?

# ? Nov 16, 2016 23:12

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 9, 2024 13:41

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

gentle pete posted:

Not relationships but

I'm honestly a little surprised the firefighters didn't hurt him for that.

# ? Nov 16, 2016 23:16

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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