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Barudak posted:My workplace training has always stressed not touching any employee under you ever due to possible implications. I sat through one that literally recommended only handshakes and hi fives, and that to be extra sure to only do that whennother coworkers were present and that touching a coworkers arm as described above could be grounds for sexual harassment. Yeah, seriously, touching is a big time no-no in most office environments I've ever worked in. It's treated a little differently with same-gendered interactions but man does it ever skeeve me out when some dude aggressively grabs my shoulder or whatever when we're trying to conversate. If you don't know me outside of work, keep your hands to yourself, it is The Rudest Goddamn Thing DragQueenofAngmar posted:You were both women; it seems weird to men because male friendships have little/none of the comraderie or emotional (and non-sexual but physical) intimacy that women seem often to have. We've all seen the back-pat-tough-bro-hug that is all that many men feel comfortable doing Yeah, I guess this is a good point. I've had some level of emotional intimacy with my closest friends but I've only ever had one male friendship that had any level of physical intimacy and in hindsight it was extremely inappropriate. Mirthless fucked around with this message at 15:36 on Jan 23, 2017 |
# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:32 |
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# ? May 28, 2024 15:37 |
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quote:My girlfriend [24F] knowingly gave me [23M] an STI
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:38 |
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:40 |
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Gaunab posted:
she's right
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:40 |
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I keep wanting to "You know, it's not like it's a serious STI..." but jesus loving christ what if it was HIV? What a horrible loving person
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:42 |
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catch HIV, give her it then sever
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:46 |
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Now this aint for everyone cause it sounds insane when i type it sounds like an obvious loony person: use protection that prevents sexually transmitted diseases and then, once serious snd considerimg the ol skin to skin have both partners get checked and share their clean bill of health. Also this lady wont even share what it is so its bad and dude needs a doctor yesterday.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:52 |
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Barudak posted:Also this lady wont even share what it is so its bad and dude needs a doctor yesterday. She said it's chlamydia, he'll be fine.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 15:58 |
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HIV, by the way, can show up six months to a year after having been contracted, so either of them could have undetectable HIV. Having unprotected sex always carries the possibility of a communicable disease.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 16:00 |
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It's pretty drat hard for a guy to catch HIV from vanilla heterosexual sex unless something weird is going on
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 16:31 |
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subhuman filth posted:It's pretty drat hard for a guy to catch HIV from vanilla heterosexual sex unless something weird is going on It's hard but not impossible and this isn't an excuse to not tell your partner you have an STI
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 16:42 |
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im incredibly full of disease but my wife knows this already its one of the reasons she fell for me actually
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 17:15 |
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Zzulu posted:im incredibly full of disease but my wife knows this already good avatar post combo right here.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 17:44 |
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The fact that dude is debating whether or not to leave her after she gave him chlamydia is hilarious. He should have instantly blocked her number and then ignored her for life. I get that people are scared of being alone, but goddamn. Have some self-respect.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 17:51 |
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Cough Drop The Beat posted:The fact that dude is debating whether or not to leave her after she gave him chlamydia is hilarious. He should have instantly blocked her number and then ignored her for life. I get that people are scared of being alone, but goddamn. Have some self-respect. It'd be one thing if she really didn't know, it's a relatively minor infection, but the fact that she knew she had something, but had no idea what it was, and then slept with him anyway? That's what really skeeves me out here. If she had a viral infection rather than bacterial he'd be stuck with a lifelong problem.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 17:53 |
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:You were both women; it seems weird to men because male friendships have little/none of the comraderie or emotional (and non-sexual but physical) intimacy that women seem often to have. We've all seen the back-pat-tough-bro-hug that is all that many men feel comfortable doing On the other hand, one reason that women sometimes do it to men is that we do not realize that men perceive it so differently. Because yeah, women who are friends touch each other all the time.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:30 |
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PleasingFungus posted:from the comments To be fair, cocaine is an excellent topical numbing agent. That's why it was in toothache drops and poo poo back in the 1800s.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:32 |
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Pick posted:On the other hand, one reason that women sometimes do it to men is that we do not realize that men perceive it so differently. Because yeah, women who are friends touch each other all the time. A lot of people are really bad at social context. There's a line between someone of the opposite sex touching your arm because they are flirting and that same person touching your arm but for literally any other reason. Sometimes that line is very fine and hard to distinguish, but more often than not, it's not that hard, people are just bad at understanding context/social cues. Also, autism probably plays a huge part in a lot of these stories. *edit* the safe bet, especially with coworkers is: They Are Not Flirting, if you think they are, ignore those thoughts and think something else. MF_James fucked around with this message at 18:36 on Jan 23, 2017 |
# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:34 |
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it'd be a lot easier if women would just touch my penis instead if they were interested in me just give it a gentle pat,
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:36 |
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Pick posted:On the other hand, one reason that women sometimes do it to men is that we do not realize that men perceive it so differently. Because yeah, women who are friends touch each other all the time. as a guy, male friendship is often incredibly hollow due to a bunch of stuff but with the "no psychical touch" thing I think it's a combo of societal homophobia and the idea that men shouldnt have/show emotion. It's a real bummer honestly
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:43 |
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I quite frankly just don't see the need to hug my friends or sit extremely close to them and rub up against them like girls seem comfortable doing with their friends what is even the point of that
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:46 |
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One random example, which always strikes me as funny, is how women and man handle sharing hotel rooms. I remember watching eight guys work out how to arrange themselves in a room with two beds, and they actually had to argue whether or not it was OK for two men to share a bed provided that they were facing different directions, so one guy's head was by the other guys feet, and vice versa. A big part of the argument was there was not enough floor space for six people. Women, on the other hand, it will just share the loving bed like normal people?
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:47 |
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other men are a threat
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:49 |
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Zzulu posted:I quite frankly just don't see the need to hug my friends or sit extremely close to them and rub up against them like girls seem comfortable doing with their friends touch releases oxytocin, which is good but society says that Zzulu posted:other men are a threat
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:51 |
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Yeah, see? There is hug in a can, who I hugged within 10 seconds of meeting her. And it was good
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:55 |
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Here's a /r/relationships post. My BF [23 M] lied to me [25 F] about having cancer and I'm utterly destroyed quote:I've been with my boyfriend for 4 months. We met through a mutual friend. Everything was going so well. 2 months ago he went to the hospital for a routine check-up and he told me they found 2 spots on his left lung and they want to investigate it more. When I met him he looked weak and depressed, it was all very believable. He goes back to do more scans, and a month ago a biopsy which confirms he has stage 1 lung cancer and a lung cyst. I become extremely depressed, start taking sleep medication, anxiety medication, I’m forced to tell my boss and my colleagues my bf has lung cancer because I frequently miss work to go see him when he feels “down”. Sometimes he would cancel our meetings last minute because he’s depressed and does not want to see anyone. I would not even be mad, because I only think about his well-being and whatever made him happy. I really stopped living for myself and was at his complete disposal. Don't fake having cancer, buddies
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:57 |
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Ladies and gentlemen, get your murder-smileys ready:quote:My BF [23 M] lied to me [25 F] about having cancer and I'm utterly destroyed Yes, this seems like the sort of thing that would turn out well if you could just get him some therapy. After all, you've already spent four months with him, so only a fool would walk away now!
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:58 |
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:You were both women; it seems weird to men because male friendships have little/none of the comraderie or emotional (and non-sexual but physical) intimacy that women seem often to have. We've all seen the back-pat-tough-bro-hug that is all that many men feel comfortable doing I feel the occasional rear end grab or ball fondle is perfectly normal among heterosexual men. On a more serious note, I have some pretty emotionally intimate relationships with my bros and I go for some straight up enveloping hugs n poo poo. I don't know if that's from effort on my end or what. Obviously, yeah, there's dudes who only I really only do the back pat thing with (and depending on situation it's more appropriate anyway) and I'm not deep feelsies buddies with every man in my life. It certainly takes more effort to foster that level of intimacy with men than women, in my experience. Still never entirely sure about the appropriate level of physical contact with a woman. I just offer hugs and roll with it. Really though, a firm handshake and a goofy smile is sufficient for either sex, especially at a more official function.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 18:58 |
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Actually men don't touch other people because there is a roiling undercurrent of potential violence with other men that can safely be avoided with social ritual and a roiling undercurrent of potential litigation with women that can be safely avoided with social ritual
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:00 |
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Pick posted:One random example, which always strikes me as funny, is how women and man handle sharing hotel rooms. I remember watching eight guys work out how to arrange themselves in a room with two beds, and they actually had to argue whether or not it was OK for two men to share a bed provided that they were facing different directions, so one guy's head was by the other guys feet, and vice versa. A big part of the argument was there was not enough floor space for six people. I've shared hotel beds with friends just fine. I don't know what was the problem with those guys.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:00 |
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DragQueenofAngmar posted:as a guy, male friendship is often incredibly hollow due to a bunch of stuff but with the "no psychical touch" thing I think it's a combo of societal homophobia and the idea that men shouldnt have/show emotion. It's a real bummer honestly If you think this is a bummer or it's Society's Oppressive Rules keeping you from rubbing all over loose acquaintances you've either never been in the same room with one of those overly touchy invasive 'free hugs' type people, or you are one of those people homophobia has little to nothing to do with the awful sensation of someone you aren't deeply intimate with, male or female, getting all up in your poo poo out of nowhere
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:01 |
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Andrast posted:I've shared hotel beds with friends just fine. I don't know what was the problem with those guys. Sharing hotel beds is how I discovered I'm a sleep cuddler!
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:02 |
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Hug in a Can posted:
4 months, this dude is habitually lying about massive stuff, why the gently caress bother with therapy? Just loving sever.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:02 |
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:If you think this is a bummer you've either never been in the same room with one of those overly touchy invasive 'free hugs' type people, or you are one of those people E: I'm more hug as greeting/farewell or you're obviously very distressed, kinda guy. Otherwise not very touchy, nor do I tend to sit or stand particularly close to people. Pvt.Scott fucked around with this message at 19:05 on Jan 23, 2017 |
# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:02 |
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I was skeptical about canned hugs, but much like tomatoes, they are clearly canned at the height of freshness. quote:Don't fake having cancer, buddies I knew a girl in high school who faked having cancer, it is surprisingly common?
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:04 |
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I hug a lot of people. Don't care how many people I hurt by doing it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0JVwfJGfins
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:06 |
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Pick posted:I was skeptical about canned hugs, but much like tomatoes, they are clearly canned at the height of freshness. I think it's pretty drat common but I would never, ever have imagined someone at that age doing it It's the kind of thing you either do when you're a teenager or do when you're at the height of your midlife crisis. It's really weird to do it during the peak years of your life. 20-35 feels like a good block of time to not need to fake cancer to get the respect of your peers
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:07 |
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Gaunab posted:I hug a lot of people. Don't care how many people I hurt by doing it Same, but with firing my .22 through people's living room windows
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:07 |
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venn diagram of people mad about 'society's arbitrary rules about hugging' and 'society's arbitrary rules about bathing' a circle etc. My [22 F] of 1 year, ignored me [22 M] for an entire day. Am I wrong? quote:My girlfriend ignored my phone calls, face times, texts, snapchats, tweets, DM's, and Facebook messages for 9 hours I'm away at school so I began to worry because she has never gone that long without responding. I contacted her parents and her closest friends. When she finally responds she claimed she was ignoring me because she was mad I didn't answer her earlier in the day (my phone died). Her reason behind ignoring me made me so mad that I have to ask an outside source if I'm wrong or if what she did was completely childish.
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:12 |
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# ? May 28, 2024 15:37 |
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:If you think this is a bummer or it's Society's Oppressive Rules keeping you from rubbing all over loose acquaintances you've either never been in the same room with one of those overly touchy invasive 'free hugs' type people, or you are one of those people I'm not talking about that hugging strangers, I'm talking about the fact that most men are so uncomfortable with friendly, nonsexual contact that "man doesn't know how to comfort sad person so awkwardly pats them on the shoulder" is so common that it's played for laughs in many movies/tv shows/commercials
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# ? Jan 23, 2017 19:17 |