Pick posted:

That said, Grand Szechuan in Bloomington. You're welcome.

Pick posted:

you feel like a douchebag because you are a douchebag, hth

artichoke posted:

Is that one of those insane kinda-Chinese buffets where they also serve pizza? I miss those.

quote:

My [22F] boyfriends [24M] best friend [23M] told him he shouldn't trust me for ridiculous reasons, because "bitches are cray"Relationships
submitted 2 hours ago by nosiefriend83

Cross posted. I understand this is my boyfriends friend, not mine, and I should let him handle it, but I am extremely hurt and offended by overhearing what he said and I want to confront him myself. I cannot seem to let it go.
I've been with my boyfriend for three years. For the past year and a half, it has been long distance. Not crazy distance, around 4 hours driving, and we still see each other one to two weekends a month. I'm graduating this May and we're getting an apartment together then.

One of his close friends has always rubbed me the wrong way. I could never put my finger on it, but he just seemed "off". I ignored it, because in every relationship you're bound not not like EVERY single one of their friends. He isn't crazy about one of my close friends, so whatever, I didn't think anything of it.

Last week, I was over my boyfriends apartment to see him once more before my semester started. I was in bed, starting to wake up but still half asleep, when I heard my boyfriend and his friend out in the kitchen. His friend had come over to get some stuff and they were just talking. The friend starts talking about me (not knowing I'm awake and can hear) and saying some very nasty things about me, and women in general. There were some small things, but this is what stands out as the most hurtful/rude-

-"Man dude idk why you gently caress around with this long distance poo poo. College girls just wanna gently caress around and not be tied down. What you think she do when ya'll are apart?! If you're both as horny as you say, there's no way she can last weeks at a time without gettin' some."

-"Bro I know you say she has an IUD an all but bitches be cray. Seriously. She could take that thing out and next thing you know you got a baby mama! Plus she could give you an STD if she hoes around while apart from you"
My boyfriend DID defend me. He tried to be nice at first and tell him to back off but after his comments got continuously degrading (the ones above) he told him to get the gently caress out of his apartment and don't come back unless he has an apology and an explanation.

It might be relevant to add that while yes, my boyfriend and I do both have VERY high sex drives, it doesn't drive either of us to cheat. Phone sex is a wonderful wonderful thing. For us, having to wait weeks to have sex makes it much better and exciting. Even if I was single, i wouldn't be the hookup type. I tried it a little my first semester while single, but it wasn't for me. I have nothing against it but I personally prefer an emotional intimate connection.
As for my IUD, I would NEVER do anything so sickening as to remove it secretly to get knocked up. I think those who tamper with condoms/birth control are the lowest of the low. Additionally, STD tests were done before ditching condoms, AKA THREE YEARS AGO! There's no concern for STD's here!

My boyfriend and I have talked about kids. I mean... we're about to move in together and are very serious about having a future together. We both want one, a boy hopefully, but not anytime soon. Not until after we've lived together and know for sure we're compatible, and until I have a more stable job. My major doesn't have a great starting salary, but has the potential to double or triple after 5 years experience.

Like I said, I was in bed half asleep when I heard all this, my boyfriend did not know I heard. I wanted to see if he would tell me on his own. He kinda did. When we sat down for breakfast he was very visibly annoyed, and when I asked why, he just said he had an argument with his friend. I then started crying and told him I overheard the whole thing. He said he initially didn't say because he didn't want to hurt me, which I understand. He hugged me and told me unless his friend has a serious apology he won't be speaking to him again.

I know I shouldn't care so much, but I'm seriously hurt that someone would accuse me of something so sick. As far as we know, this friend has NEVER been trapped into having a baby, never been cheated on, and never had a LDR. Of course, we could just not know, but I have no reason to believe he has a motive for this. Additionally, this friend did NOT know me prior to my boyfriend and I's relationship, so it's not like he had a shady past to base me off of.
I can't shake this off. It's taking everything in me not to drive to this kids house on the way up to see my boyfriend next and confront him. I've never been spoken about so disgustingly.

tl;dr: VERY hurt by comments made by my boyfriends friend and I don't know how to let them go.

Pick posted:

Pick posted:

I know I shouldn't care so much, but I'm seriously hurt that someone would accuse me of something so sick. As far as we know, this friend has NEVER been trapped into having a baby, never been cheated on, and never had a LDR. Of course, we could just not know, but I have no reason to believe he has a motive for this. Additionally, this friend did NOT know me prior to my boyfriend and I's relationship, so it's not like he had a shady past to base me off of.
I can't shake this off. It's taking everything in me not to drive to this kids house on the way up to see my boyfriend next and confront him. I've never been spoken about so disgustingly.

Gaunab posted:

She should brush it off. Her boyfriend defended her and told his friend off.

ArbitraryC posted:

Yeah I don't really get the problem here, boyfriend even is severing with the friend like she couldn't have asked for a better conclusion.

ArbitraryC posted:

Odds of that dude being an incel seem high.

ArbitraryC posted:

Yeah I don't really get the problem here, boyfriend even is severing with the friend like she couldn't have asked for a better conclusion.

Pick posted:

as someone with an IUD, just lol at the idea i could "sneak it out"

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

most of r/relationships isn't actually looking for advice, they just wanted to tell a little story, and for once it's not 'my spouse acts upset when I put my cigarette out in their eye, they're so irrational"

Mirthless posted:

seriously, pretty much the second they see you with the wheelbarrow and digging tools you'll get droned

Yawgmoth posted:

Birth control has gotten weird

TheScott2K posted:

Kinda surprised nobody's posted the 18 year old who's scared of his boner yet.

quote:

It was my friend Danny's birthday. I didn't really want to go because I was sore from hockey practice, but I figured it would be rude of me not to turn up. I went. I was sitting with my friend, Tasha, and I told her I got a little banged up at practice. She's really nurturing, so she had me sit in front of her and she proceeded to give me a shoulder rub. No one noticed. They were all spread out throughout the house, socializing.

I felt it happening. I was wearing fitted jeans so it was pretty visible. Tasha's a cool person, but I'm not attracted to her like that. My body just responded naturally I guess. Either way I felt guilty and really awkward so I grabbed a pillow and put it on my lap telling her I was fine and that she could stop. The second I got up, the pillow slipped from my hands and she got a full view. I wasn't "exposed" but her eyes got all wide, so I'm pretty sure she saw it.

I sped off before she could say or do anything.

Now I'm wondering if I should maybe apologize to her? What if she thinks I was using her for the massage or something? I wasn't. The second I felt myself get hard, I made her stop. I don't know what to do now. It's been two days, and we haven't talked since.

tl;dr She gave me a friendly shoulder rub. I ended up getting a boner. Pretty sure she noticed. I ran away like an idiot because I'm awkward. I feel really bad now. Should I apologize to her? I wasn't getting off on her touching me or anything. I just felt really relaxed. It happened out of nowhere.

TheScott2K posted:

My (18/M) body naturally reacted to a shoulder rub that one of my friends (18/F) gave me. I'm worried she saw it.


Idiot kid thinks he violated her and that "she wouldn't appreciate that line of thinking" when replies a girl giving him a shoulder rub might consider touching his penis. OP then declares "asexual!" like that somehow makes him less pathetic.

Mirthless posted:

dudes who are too awkward to explore their sexuality and write their anxiety off as asexuality make me really loving sad

if you got a boner from a shoulder rub from a girl you're not loving asexual you idiot

why does everyone have to add a layer of personal hardship to everything in their loving lives now?

Pick posted:

guys just get boners. it doesn't necessarily mean anything. they just do. they just get 'em.

fruit on the bottom posted:

Look, I was a teenager once too, and I distinctly recall boners happening for absolutely no loving reason.

I *promise* that I did not find Trigonometry erotic.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

guy sounds like a late bloomer but typically the root cause of boners in teenagers is 'you are a teenager'

TheScott2K posted:

He wasn't in trig class.

Mirthless posted:

that boner has a pretty identifiable cause

TheScott2K posted:

Thanks to mirthless I now regret posting