A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i get 220wpm by smacking my flaccid cock against the keys

Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of one year, he's essentially a walking hurricane

I was making bread and got the mix to butter ratio wrong. The butter leaked all over the pan and was spilling over the sides. He got the pan and carried it across three rooms to show me, leaving a trail of melted butter that I then got to clean up.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

i get 220wpm by smacking my flaccid cock against the keys

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of one year, he's essentially a walking hurricane

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of one year, he's essentially a walking hurricane

Yawgmoth posted:

I type 80wpm using my index & middle fingers alone, and it's hilarious to see all the freakouts people have over it.

Naerasa posted:

I know we're doing the wpm jokes, but in all seriousness, I only use my two pointer figures and I average around 105wpm. Nobody has been able to understand this, but I know the truth: it's because I got on IRC before I was old enough to have taken a legit typing class. In order to be queen of the nerds, I learned to speed-type to keep up with chat even though my form was bad. I'm sure I'd be able to type faster if I switched styles, but it works for me so I don't see a reason to fix it.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of one year, he's essentially a walking hurricane

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Me [25 F] with my boyfriend [30 M] of one year, he's essentially a walking hurricane

Play posted:

flick my Mr. Bean posted:

I learned a strategy from the last paragraph.

Hahaha the lady sprays herself in the face like she's a dog who's done something wrong and the man... eats an entire raw potato. gently caress with natural human instincts and this is what you get, literal insanity.

quote:

Tl;dr: Aunt and her husband are pretty much stealing from their children by selling/returning what they get as gifts. My mother and myself are getting extremely fed up, but have no idea what to do.

Let's just start this by saying that I (21F) have no idea what to do in this situation... Neither does my mother (42F) who has been probably affected the most because of my aunt's antics.

Here is a little backstory on my aunt... She was married, had two children (13M,10F) got divorced. He was a pedophile (nothing to do with his own children, thankfully) and a creep. She finally saw the light after 7 years of us telling her the same thing. He is now homeless and suicidal. She also happened to cheat on her first husband with another man, even brought him to the house she was living in at the time (which is right next door). She let this man into her home and let him play with her children three days before she had even kicked out her first husband and divorced him. She is now married to this second man and has been for 7 years. He's a complete idiot. My family hate him and so does his own. No one really speaks to him other than to be polite and I avoid him completely. He's whiny, rude, extremely hyper, has no filter, is jealous of his stepchildren, and makes sure to let everyone know that their new addition to the family (1F) is much more important than the other two children. My aunt does not work. She says she quit her job for the baby, but we believe she was fired. He works at a cellphone store and makes barely anything. He gets fast food (just for himself) every night for dinner because he refuses to eat anything else except sweets, fried chicken, pizza, macaroni and cheese, bread, and mixing bowl servings of ice cream and cereal. My aunt let's him have his way with everything and anything.

As far as all that goes, we have tried to intervene, but it just results in no one being able to see the children. We've given up trying to do anything. We learned this with the first husband, as it went the same way.

Recently, she has turned to selling anything and everything that has been given to the kids. She promises to give the children their money or buy them something else, but never does. They always come back to us crying that she took it. She uses it on herself and her husband. They spend on themselves lavishly and get new cellphones, video games/consoles, jewelry, fast food, etc. They end up barely being able to pay bills. They were behind on rent for three months straight this last summer. They take every little bit they can. My mother has compared it to drug addicts selling whatever they can to get a fix.
Before Halloween, the older children (13M,10F) helped my father stack wood and my mother gave them about $15 dollars a piece. They went to Walmart and spent it with my mother. The next day, the children called her up and said that my aunt forced them to take their toys back under the excuse that they were broken. She kept the money. My mother didn't want to start an argument, but felt bad for the kids and gave them another $15 a piece (I warned her what would happen). My aunt took it again. On Halloween, we had a scavenger hunt and the two happened to receive money in the prizes. She took it. On top of all this, she had convinced the oldest (13M) to sell his PS3 so that she could use the money until she could give it back to him. She gave it back, he spent it on a smart watch. She then sold that and kept the money. For weeks we heard about the money she owed him. She has also taken back/sold gifts for the baby under the excuse that it didn't fit or that she already had one.

So the boiling point has been reached. My mother bought a drone for the oldest (13M) for Christmas. Aunt's husband threw a fit about having to register it and that one of the fans/propellers? was broken. My mother sent it back herself and offered to get something else instead of giving money, as she has learned not to do that at all now. He chose a tablet. We found out a couple of days ago my aunt was trying to sell it. Well today the oldest came in the house and told us that he was supposed to be getting the money. My husband (23M) piped in. He had rode with my aunt to watch her baby in the car while she handled some business about her old rental property yesterday. Come to find out, she had also met someone and sold the tablet... Then got fast food for herself and my husband (he had no idea what was going on) and then used the rest for gas. So, my aunt had sold the tablet, spent the money, and then refused to tell her oldest that it had already been sold.

She's using a local fb group to sell what she can't return.

She has pissed me off completely. I thought I had figured out a way around it. I bought the children a bunch of snacks and candy for Christmas figuring that she wouldn't bother to take it back if it really didn't cost that much. Even got snacks for the baby. Plus, I figured they would be in it before they left my grandparent's house on Christmas Eve, so she couldn't do anything with it anyway. Well, come to find out, what they didn't get a chance to eat, her husband ate. It was all taken from them once they got home.

I can't win for losing.

I'm just wondering if you guys have any advice at all on what to do. I just don't understand how she has no remorse for doing it and doesn't care if we know. If we just refuse to buy anything at all it would upset the children. They know what she is doing is wrong, but they're still kids and like gifts.

MF_James posted:

She called my buddy from her exbfs hotel room while she's huffing on cans of air duster

quote:

So, if you do the math, I was with my girlfriend when she was 16. That's... Not something I'm proud about. When she was 20, around a year and a half ago, she broke up with me. Because, errm, because that was just not okay. I was sad, but I mostly accepted that was the way it was meant. After this I pretty much gave up on myself, estimated I had no right to pursue relationships (I'd normally go for my age, but that's not really the question anymore). Nor any right for any new social life really, I mean what can I expect the moment I talk about my ex? I'm keeping my existing relationships with friends and family because they chose to not end it and were even supportive, so that's for them to decide. But no new ones.

That was my plan... But a couple months ago my ex reached out and asked to get back together. Regardless of my opinion that it was wrong and I would not get back with her, I discovered very soon that I don't have the capability to say no to her. Especially not after hearing her story and reasons. Her wishes are just more important to me than my opinions, I have to accept that she will always wrap me around her finger. I don't even feel bad for the current state of affairs considering she's 21 and she knew how to get out of it once. I decided if she wanted another relationship I'd invest myself to try and make it work for who we are. It's fairly recent, I mean that was in November, but we seem to work well.

My problem is what do I do now with family and friends who have children and want me in their lives. No one - no one! - ditched me nor told me to get lost over the original relationship nor the new one. I'm still welcome, and invited, regularly to family events, of my family and my friends. Dinners, holidays and the like. Older children though are starting to get old enough to realize what are relationships, and that my girlfriend and I are a couple, not friends. They also remember her, albeit confusely, from when we started. I worry about what kind of example I'm setting there and what will they think in the future. I'm usually well-liked by children this age and they're all over me when I visit. Same for her. We're not exactly the guys in the background.

Parents tell me I'm overthinking this and there will be time to talk to them about relationships later. I'm glad they are accepting of us but I'm not sure I'm not letting the children down by continuing to be around while in this relationship, and wondering if I'm not supposed to "know better" than the parents.

tl;dr: Started dating girlfriend when she was 16. We broke up, but are back together now she is 21. Family and friends are supportive, but their children are growing up and I'm worrying about what kind of example that's setting for them

Themata posted:

Here are some people who would've been better off /r/childfree.

Aunt (37F) keeps returning and reselling gifts given to her children (13M,10F,1F) and uses the money to spend on herself and husband.

54 40 or gently caress posted:

One kid had even started peeling the serial numbers off his Xbox 360s because his parents kept pawning them, rebuying them and pawning them again

TheScott2K posted:

:whatthechrist:

Me [36M] with my girlfriend [21F] of 4 years with recent 1.5 years separation, not sure if I'm not toxic to family children

Themata posted:

Here are some people who would've been better off /r/childfree.

Aunt (37F) keeps returning and reselling gifts given to her children (13M,10F,1F) and uses the money to spend on herself and husband.

quote:

TL;DR: Tried to do a favor for stressed-out husband, got snapped at, yelling and ugliness ensues. For those patient enough to read wall-of-text, I'd love to know what you think about how bad this all is and what I should do about it.

Husband (who I will call James) and I are both 43, married 5 years. We are a blended family and have three kids together (2 mine from previous marriage, 1 his from previous marriage).

His son/my step-son (who I will call Harry) is 8 and is a truly great kid. I adore him and my kids do too.

James and I get along very well most of the time...except when we don’t. Today was one of those days.

James just started a new job this week, and while it’s been a very lucrative move, it’s also been very stressful. He’s a fairly high level executive and is managing a lot of tense transition issues.

I can tell it’s been very difficult. He worked from home today, so I was kind of observing what was going on with him from the sidelines.

Harry needs to be picked up, across town, no later than 6. James almost always picks Harry up from school on the days when Harry is not with his mother.
I could tell he was stressed about it today, so I volunteered to do it. James was initially very grateful to accept and I was actually really feeling good that I could pitch in and lighten his load on such a rough day.

Because I'm usually on this end of town picking up my 2 kids (who are with their dad today), I’ve only been to Harry’s school a couple of times. I only vaguely recall how their pickup works, but I knew they have a computer system with a code you punch in. It's very different than what I'm used to my kids' school.

Last time I picked Harry up, James gave me the code and a whole bunch of explanation about where the entrance was, what to do when I got there, etc. That was months ago. I have a crap memory for details like that, and just remember something about having to have a code.

I asked him what the code was and he gave an exasperated sigh and said something like “there’s a book right there, you can just look it up.” I don’t recall anything about any book, and I was pretty sure he had the code memorized so I said, “Can’t you just tell me the code?”

He jumped up, very dramatically and said something along the lines of “if I was going to be that difficult he would just go get him himself.” He started gathering his things in a huff as if he was going to head right out the door.

I told him to calm down, that I was ready to head out the door to pick Harry up, and that all I wanted to know was the code. He backed down, told me the code and I left.

I was feeling annoyed and unfairly picked on. I thought a lot on the car ride about how to fairly express the fact that while I appreciated how very stressed out he was, that I felt it was unfair to be so rude and snappish toward someone you love that is trying to help you out. I planned to bring it up at the end of the evening when things had settled down.

Traffic was terrible and it took me more than two hours round-trip to pick Harry up. While we were in the car, I asked Harry what he wanted me to make him for dinner and although I offered to cook him some of his favorites, he really wanted us to order pizza. I told him that would be fine with me so long as his dad was OK with it.

I went into the room where James was working. I peeked in to make sure he wasn’t on a call or in the middle of frantic typing, and it seemed like an OK time to approach. I told him Harry wanted us to order pizza and asked if that would be OK. He snapped back “fine.” I then asked if I could order anything particular for him. He snapped at me, with a very hostile tone, that he did not have time to be bothered with stuff like this right now.

At that point I lost my grip on my patience, so I snapped back that I was sorry to inconvenience him so much by asking questions about taking care of his son.
[I acknowledge that this was said with a tone that was not nice. Take 10 points from Gryffindor for that one, I guess.]

He jumped up, stormed past me, flew down the stairs, saying he’d handle it as apparently it was just too much for him to expect me to actually be supportive of him, he was sorry he ever let me help him, and would never ask me to do so again.

He went down and ordered the pizza and I went into another room to gather my thoughts and cool down a bit.

I have a history of being a doormat which makes things like this dicey for me. I decided that I did need to try stand up for myself and tell him that I was not OK with him being so hostile and snappish toward someone who (1) you supposedly love and (2) is actually actively engaged in the process of helping you out at the time.

So I told him that, and he acted like he had no idea what I was talking about. He preceded to replay the entire conversation as if he had simply tried to patiently explain to me how there was a book right by the computer that had all the codes in it...basically recasting the whole initial conversation as a polite and kind one, when the tone of it was clearly snappish and hostile.

He does this kind of thing a lot, and I wasn't having it. I told him that was not the way it went, and that he knew that. I reminded him of how he got up all dramatically and threatened to go get Harry himself, and reminded him of how he also snapped at me for asking if I should order anything for him for dinner.
I then said that I felt like I needed to stand up for myself and that I would not just sit back and tolerate someone being an rear end in a top hat to me when I was trying to help them out. (Yes, I realize I should have not used that word. 10 more points from Gryffindor for that one).

His response was, “Sure, stand up for yourself, and go ahead and just destroy this whole marriage while you’re at it.”

He then followed by saying that he would never ever ask me to help out with Harry or do any favors for him again, as it was clear that I couldn’t be supportive when it was so obvious that he needed support.

He then added that when I “finally got my career going again” (I work, but things have not been going well and I am struggling to get things on a better track, so this was a nice low-blow), I’d better not ask him for support.

But that if I did, he was going to make sure to stand in front of me and ask me a bunch of silly little questions while I was super busy preparing for a big presentation or something. He mimicked me while he was saying this, using a ditzy tone and saying “What do I do about this? What do I do about that?”

And I just kept saying things like, No, this is unacceptable, you don’t get to treat your wife like dirt just because you’re having a bad day, you’re being an rear end in a top hat, I won’t tolerate this kind of treatment, etc. (Yes, used the rear end in a top hat word a 2nd time so another -10 from Gryffindor).

We stormed off to our separate corners and have been avoiding each other since.

I don’t know where to take this from here. I’m so upset I can’t sort through things very clearly right now, so I thought some dispassionate advice would help.

My questions are: (1) Am I right to be so offended and upset by this treatment? (2) Does he have a point that I should have been more understanding given his level of stress, not asked questions, or let it go if he snapped when I did? (3) Any suggestions about where to go from here?

tl;dr: Due to Wall-of-Text I put the TL;DR right up top. My sincere gratitude goes to anyone that actually reads this whole thing!!

Themata posted:

Here are some people who would've been better off /r/childfree.

Aunt (37F) keeps returning and reselling gifts given to her children (13M,10F,1F) and uses the money to spend on herself and husband.

WampaLord posted:

TheScott2K posted:

Harry Potter is a dumb book for children.

quote:

Three years ago, my parents died within two months of each other and my sister was only four at the time. At the time I was just out of college, but I had been hired by a company that recruited employees from top colleges in my field. We don't really have any other family that I'd be remotely comfortable leaving her to, so I decided upon taking her in myself.

Taking care of her has definitely been a challenge for me, but I've adjusted and it's been an incredibly rewarding experience and I wouldn't have it any other way.
My current girlfriend and I met during a conference that I attended and really hit it off immediately. We have a lot in common, and really seem to mesh very well. Our conversations are almost effortless and being together with her feels very natural.

We've been together for a year and nine months at this point and we've had a very fulfilling relationship so far. I told her from the beginning that I take care of my younger sister and she said that she didn't mind at all and that she likes children.

Recently we have been discussing what our future together would look like. She says that she's in no hurry for us to get married and that at the end of the day it's just a piece of paper and that she just wants to be with me regardless of the formalities around it.

She said that from what I've told her that my sister sounds great and that she'd really like to meet her. She also added that she's not pressuring me about it, and that she totally understands if I'm uncomfortable with the idea.

We've been dating for a good chunk of time and it's approaching two years now. My main reason for being reluctant about introducing my girlfriend to my sister is that my sister has already dealt with more loss than most children go through in their entire childhood. I'm hesitant about the possibility of her getting attached to my girlfriend and something going awry.

I definitely want my girlfriend to be my long term partner. I've thought about it a lot and I love her and want us to spend our lives together.

What is the right thing for me to do here? Should I put off introducing my girlfriend to my sister for now? How long would be an acceptable time frame for something like this?

tl;dr: Unsure of whether or not I should introduce my sister (who I take care of) to my girlfriend yet.

quote:

Well, after posting here, and asking some of my acquaintances who had experience with this kind of issue (most of whom said that six months would have been sufficient), I decided to bite the bullet and introduce the two.

I decided upon taking the three of us out ice skating (an activity my sister really enjoys). At first my girlfriend wasn't so good, but she started to get the hang of it and we had a really great time. Afterwards the three of us went out for pizza.

The two of them got along really well, my sister thought my girlfriend's skating abilities were absolutely hilarious and kept trying to help her get the hang of it. I think my girlfriend knew how ridiculous she looked because she couldn't help but laugh at herself (her ability to laugh at herself is something I really like about her).

When I asked my sister what she thought about my girlfriend she said that she was pretty and funny and that she liked her and wanted to see her again. Similarly, the next time my girlfriend and I were together she said that she had a fun time and that my sister was great and she couldn't believe that I had been "hiding her" for all this time.

I'm pretty comfortable with the way things went. I'm thinking about possibly inviting my girlfriend over when I make dinner for me sister and I sometime next week, but I'm still a bit hesitant because a lot of the comments in my last post urged taking it slow, so I'll have to give it some thought.

tl;dr: Took the two of them out ice skating and went for pizza after. Everyone had a great time.

TheScott2K posted:

He handled it poorly. She fails to realize that asking a zillion questions while "helping" kind of renders the help null. He should have snapped out of his poo poo and handled things like an adult, she maybe could have left him alone when he clearly wasn't in "interact with my wife mode."

Harry Potter is a dumb book for children.

TheScott2K posted:

He handled it poorly. She fails to realize that asking a zillion questions while "helping" kind of renders the help null. He should have snapped out of his poo poo and handled things like an adult, she maybe could have left him alone when he clearly wasn't in "interact with my wife mode."

Harry Potter is a dumb book for children.

Mirthless posted:

The harry potter poo poo and honestly most of what she says in her post is an awful big for somebody in the middle of their loving forties

Her executive husband is working (as in, his job) during these interruptions and she's awarding points to and from gryffindor, no wonder he's so loving fed up

edit: fwiw he's still being a huge dick but this lady is way too old to be acting this way

boner confessor posted:

she posts on reddit, she can be excused for posting like a nerd

her husband is a walking ball of tightly wound resentment though

Yawgmoth posted:

"hey what's the password to pick up the kid I'm picking up" and several hours later "hey we're getting pizza, any requests" is not a zillion questions, jesus holy christ. These aren't even really involved questions! The first gets "713" or whatever the loving code is, and the second gets "nah I'm good thanks." If you can't handle basic loving questions like that, I'm surprised you could manage to trick anyone into being around you long enough to conceive. He might get a little sympathy if she was asking questions that required a lot of consideration and/or was asking every 20 minutes, but (a) she wasn't and (b) the moment you start mimicking/mocking someone is the moment you deserve to get your teeth removed with a hammer.

boner confessor posted:

she posts on reddit, she can be excused for posting like a nerd

her husband is a walking ball of tightly wound resentment though

Hughlander posted:

He's also going through one of the top three most stressful times in your life. Maybe he isn't normally so wound.

Mirthless posted:

he's doing a high stress job from home at the highest level of his profession

the thing with the gate code and the book in particular is a little ridiculous. he told her where to find the code. he literally cannot be bothered with this.

boner confessor posted:

stress doesn't make you act like an rear end in a top hat. it just removes the inhibitions which allows you to keep your inner rear end in a top hat in check

boner confessor posted:

stress doesn't make you act like an rear end in a top hat. it just removes the inhibitions which allows you to keep your inner rear end in a top hat in check

yeah he can always be bothered with making sure his kid is picked up from school

Mirthless posted:

I am gonna go out on a limb here and guess that he doesn't have the code memorized for sure and probably checks the book pretty often himself

quote:

I told him to calm down, that I was ready to head out the door to pick Harry up, and that all I wanted to know was the code. He backed down, told me the code and I left.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

stress is not a beer dude, the most laid-back thoughtful person on earth will develop a short fuse and start snapping over harmless mild irritants when they're super stressed out. Jesus will grab a whip and gently caress your poo poo up for being annoying when he's had a bad enough day. regardless, husband's had plenty of time to realize he was being a dick and apologize, and he's decided to double down.

boner confessor posted:

stress doesn't make you act like an rear end in a top hat. it just removes the inhibitions which allows you to keep your inner rear end in a top hat in check

boner confessor posted:

stress doesn't make you act like an rear end in a top hat. it just removes the inhibitions which allows you to keep your inner rear end in a top hat in check


yeah he can always be bothered with making sure his kid is picked up from school

boner confessor posted:

TheScott2K posted:

The kid is getting picked up from school. If he was at the office she'd just look in the god drat book.

"Can you please just handle this?" is a real thing that happens to non-bad people during stressful times. Bear in mind we're also getting her version of this story, where she isn't nagging him about a bunch of other poo poo and everything he says is with an angry tone that may or may not actually be there.

boner confessor posted:

"can you please just handle this" is more reasonable than what he actually said, along the lines of "fine i'll never ask for your help again" and "why do you want to blow up this marriage"

boner confessor posted:

short fuse is one thing, mocking your partner to blow off steam is something else

TheScott2K posted:

Again, we're getting her version of this.

Mirthless posted:

She glosses over the importance of what he is doing throughout the entire post. He is doing something that is probably fairly hard at an extremely high level and she does not seem to respect that at all.