Schadenfreude Thread: What did they think would happen?

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Perestroika: Apr 8, 2010

Basebf555 posted:

The implosion of the Mass Effect series is pretty impressive. They went from making one of the unquestioned greatest games of all time in Mass Effect 2, to a fan revolt that changed the public perception of the franchise 180 degrees with just a single lovely game release. It took Assassins Creed like 5 lovely games to get to that point.

Hell, I'd say that the majority of ME3 was just fine, too, not to mention the surprisingly fun multiplayer (though I haven't played it since shortly after release). It's mostly just that the ending was such incredible dogshit that it retroactively tainted the entire game.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 21:30

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# ? May 16, 2024 00:04

Azhais: Feb 5, 2007; Switchblade Switcharoo

Perestroika posted:

Hell, I'd say that the majority of ME3 was just fine, too, not to mention the surprisingly fun multiplayer (though I haven't played it since shortly after release). It's mostly just that the ending was such incredible dogshit that it retroactively tainted the entire ~~game~~ franchise.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 21:31

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Mass Effect 1 was the only good one.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 21:40

Goa Tse-tung: Feb 11, 2008; ;3; Yams Fan

Sun Wu Kampf posted:

So, after years of development and millions of dollars, Bioware released THIS to reviewers:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XA07hLF-3tE

wait is that real? and this game actually gets good scores? :psyduck:

# ? Mar 16, 2017 21:50

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Goa Tse-tung posted:

wait is that real? and this game actually gets good scores?

If a game scores below ~8.8 from a AAA game company that basically means it's total garbage. It's like the lowest score a review site can give them.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 21:55

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Basebf555 posted:

The implosion of the Mass Effect series is pretty impressive. They went from making one of the unquestioned greatest games of all time in Mass Effect 2, to a fan revolt that changed the public perception of the franchise 180 degrees with just a single lovely game release. It took Assassins Creed like 5 lovely games to get to that point.

Someone on a goon gaming Facebook page posted a giant-rear end rant about it, but basically Bioware lost something like 5/6 of its staff when EA tried to turn Dragon Age into an annual series and made them churn out Dragon Age 2 in less than a year. The stress of trying to produce a Triple-A RPG in 6 or 7 months caused most of the staff to quit, and they were in turn replaced by new people who conflict with the old guard still left (including a lot of Bioware fans).

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:00

Random Stranger: Nov 27, 2009

Junkie Disease posted:

You can never stop me from checking out volcanoes.

The best thing is that if you do get burned, you get to tell everyone that you got your awesome scar from an erupting volcano.

Solice Kirsk posted:

Mass Effect 1 was the only good one.

Counterpoint: Mass Effect 1 was also bad.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:32

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Random Stranger posted:

The best thing is that if you do get burned, you get to tell everyone that you got your awesome scar from an erupting volcano.

This ranks just under "shark bite" in stories about scars that can potentially get you laid.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:44

PerilPastry: Oct 10, 2012

Celery Face posted:

It's pretty satisfying watching shoplifters acting like victims because they don't wanna face the fact that you might get arrested if you steal.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cQZ63b6HA9Y

If you're some guy making minimum wage at retail why in the ever loving gently caress would you ever try to detain a resisting shop lifter? Does RiteAid have, like, a Congressional Medal of Honor for that or something?

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:48

Skaw: Aug 5, 2004

I want to say that guy was probably just a bystander who caught the girl stealing. Dude isn't dressed like he works at a CVS.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:49

Chichevache: Feb 17, 2010; One of the funniest posters in GIP.

Just not intentionally.

PerilPastry posted:

If you're some guy making minimum wage at retail why in the ever loving gently caress would you ever try to detain a resisting shop lifter?

How often do you get to legally fight a woman? You don't pass that opportunity up.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:50

Burning_Monk: Jan 11, 2005; Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to know

Skaw posted:

I want to say that guy was probably just a bystander who caught the girl stealing. Dude isn't dressed like he works at a CVS.

He's says in the video that he works there.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 22:54

Your Gay Uncle: Feb 16, 2012; by Fluffdaddy

chitoryu12 posted:

My favorite part is that I got to look up this dude and compare how he wants to look to how he looks in real life.

Also this motherfucker is 44 and still stuck performing stand-up comedy at furry conventions.

Why on Earth would a Gryphon need a gun?

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:00

Elizabethan Error: May 18, 2006

Skaw posted:

I want to say that guy was probably just a bystander who caught the girl stealing. Dude isn't dressed like he works at a CVS.

Loss Prevention doesn't usually require a uniform, what are you expecting? the anti-theft people running around with handheld neon signs?

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:01

Platystemon: Feb 13, 2012; BREADS

chitoryu12 posted:

My favorite part is that I got to look up this dude and compare how he wants to look to how he looks in real life.

Also this motherfucker is 44 and still stuck performing stand-up comedy at furry conventions.

I just noticed the gratuitous tail.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:10

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

Just a dude sick of people getting away with breaking the law? He's like the Batman of that CVS. The hero they need.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:09

Atticus_1354: Dec 10, 2006; barkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbark

Platystemon posted:

I just noticed the gratuitous tail.

I'm not trying to defend the jackass, but griffins have historically been portrayed with a tail.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:19

Platystemon: Feb 13, 2012; BREADS

Atticus_1354 posted:

I'm not trying to defend the jackass, but griffins have historically been portrayed with a tail.

No, I mean the way it�s displayed there.

It can�t be hanging behind the character, out of sight. It has to be shown off.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:20

Azhais: Feb 5, 2007; Switchblade Switcharoo

Goa Tse-tung posted:

wait is that real? and this game actually gets good scores?

No big company review is worth the bytes it consumes on the internet. If they give bad scores they'll never get another game from anyone so everything from a major publisher is 9.5/10, goty, even if it is total poo poo.

Wait for about six months after release and check the metacritic user ratings.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:24

Atticus_1354: Dec 10, 2006; barkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbarkbark

Platystemon posted:

No, I mean the way it�s displayed there.

It can�t be hanging behind the character, out of sight. It has to be shown off.

You're right. A dick would be a bit too obvious.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:24

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

His knees are also bending the wrong way for a lions back legs. Just a really poorly thought out fursona. Just total crap.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:24

lfield: May 10, 2008

PerilPastry posted:

If you're some guy making minimum wage at retail why in the ever loving gently caress would you ever try to detain a resisting shop lifter? Does RiteAid have, like, a Congressional Medal of Honor for that or something?

Some stores punish the workers for thefts that occur.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:25

Solice Kirsk: Jun 1, 2004; .

lfield posted:

Some stores punish the workers for thefts that occur.

Where? I've literally never heard of this ever.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:26

TopHatGenius: Oct 3, 2008; something feels
different; Hot Rope Guy

Solice Kirsk posted:

Where? I've literally never heard of this ever.

Never heard of this either. Maybe that only happens in real small stores. Large retail chains just write it off.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:29

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

I don't know about punishing workers for theft occurring (beyond firing people to "make up for lost revenue"), but they sure as hell love punishing workers who try to stop shoplifting. The liability is too risky, so workers are usually trained to just let people go and call the police if necessary.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:34

Decrepus: May 21, 2008; In the end, his dominion did not touch a single poster.

When I worked at Walmart (lol) I had my balls busted all the time when they found opened CDs (lol) in the area I worked. They'd always say I needed to greet the customers more often to prevent this deplorable behavior.

e: lol

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:44

Bar Crow: Oct 10, 2012

Azhais posted:

Wait for about six months after release and check the metacritic user ratings.

Better yet, wait 5 years and see if anyone even remembers the game and if there is a Steam sale.

# ? Mar 16, 2017 23:46

BrianBoitano: Nov 15, 2006; this is fine

Nah just work 70-80 hours a week then spend another 10 hours Ubering every year until you retire. At that point you'll have enough money to buy everything on release regardless of quality.

Bonus: the tech will be better by then. Not the storylines though.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:01

Randaconda: Jul 3, 2014; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

chitoryu12 posted:

Someone on a goon gaming Facebook page posted a giant-rear end rant about it, but basically Bioware lost something like 5/6 of its staff when EA tried to turn Dragon Age into an annual series and made them churn out Dragon Age 2 in less than a year. The stress of trying to produce a Triple-A RPG in 6 or 7 months caused most of the staff to quit, and they were in turn replaced by new people who conflict with the old guard still left (including a lot of Bioware fans).

I loved Dragon Age Origins, then played Dragon Ages 2. :smith:

Yay, the same dungeon for the 92nd time! With dumbed down combat!

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:01

White Genocide: Feb 22, 2010

lfield posted:

Some stores punish the workers for thefts that occur.

well then dont work at professor zimbardos party emporium dumbass!! ahahaha

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:02

Prokhor Zakharov: Dec 31, 2008; This is me as I make another great post

Good luck with your depression!

PerilPastry posted:

If you're some guy making minimum wage at retail why in the ever loving gently caress would you ever try to detain a resisting shop lifter? Does RiteAid have, like, a Congressional Medal of Honor for that or something?

If you work in loss prevention/security and your store develops a shoplifting problem then they'll just fire you if you don't start catching/stopping people.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:02

Platystemon: Feb 13, 2012; BREADS

Prokhor Zakharov posted:

If you work in loss prevention/security and your store develops a shoplifting problem then they'll just fire you if you don't start catching/stopping people.

someone on Reddit posted:

I used to work in loss prevention for a regional chain of electronics stores. Let's call it poo poo Store. My job was basically to patrol the store in plain clothes and detain someone if I caught them trying to steal. I've worked private security before so this was a pretty nice gig.

poo poo Store's corporate policy, for reasons I cannot quite comprehend, mandated a weekly quota of shoplifter apprehensions, which we called "stops." We needed to have at least 3 stops a week. Usually we had about 10, just shy of 2 per day, and obviously most of the stops involved expensive electronics. We paid our own salaries many times over and saved the company an astronomical amount of money.

Until one week. Saturday rolled around (our schedule weeks ran Sunday-Saturday) and all loss prevention personnel were called into the office. There were four of us. The store manager told us that only two stops had been made for the week, so we had not met our quota. He contacted corporate and they told him to give all loss prevention personnel the entire next week off to save on costs. An extra cashier would be scheduled to stand by the door as a deterrent. (I later learned that other stores were implementing this policy in order to phase out plain clothes LP altogether.)

As you can imagine, a week of no pay did not exactly go over well with us. It was particularly bad timing for me. My rent was due, my dog had some vet bills, and my nephew's birthday was coming up. I, and all of my co-workers, did everything to fight this. We talked about how we usually met our quota many times over, How we paid our own salaries with all the stops we did, how much money we had saved the company, how laughably ineffective an untrained cashier standing by the door would be... but it all fell on deaf ears. By the end of it the manager was clearly flustered but insisted that we just stay home the next week. "Think of it like a vacation," he said. We all had paid time off available but of course he said that we couldn't use it. "It's about cutting losses for the company," he said.
Cutting losses, oh dear. If only he knew the poo poo I was about to pull...

We all went home feeling pissed and wronged. But before I even set foot in my door, I had the vague beginnings of a plan for vengeance.

The Revenge

Now, I had a few friends, or I guess acquaintances, who were a bit shady. They were generally straight-laced, but they themselves had friends who were even shadier. Dealers, addicts, and even a few gang members if the rumors were true. They usually hung out in one of three parks in the city limits, so after blowing off some steam at home, I began to make my rounds.

The conversation with each group followed a pretty set pattern: I would say hi but look a little pissed, they would ask how I was doing, I'd say something like "Not too good I guess, poo poo Store just gave the entire loss prevention team the week off to save money! I'm gonna miss out on an entire paycheck!" A few would probe a bit and I would verify that, yes, anyone could walk into the store and take poo poo without having to worry about an undercover LP watching them.

I knew that my plan was beginning to take hold when someone I hadn't talked to posted on Facebook asking if it was true that poo poo Store had no loss prevention this week. Word gets around fast. All I had to do now was head to the store, grab a 30 pk of beer, and slowly drink the week away while poo poo went down.

People lost their loving minds. A poo poo load of product went missing every day, and not just little things-- people were apparently walking out with giant flat screen TVs and refusing to stop for the lowly cashier by the door (that usually wasn't paying attention anyway). Tablets, laptops, netbooks, and consoles vanished into thin air. Several cell phones from the display case even went missing.

I would not hear about this till later, though. All I know is that on Wednesday, hardly halfway through my unpaid week off, I got a call from work. I let it go to voicemail and couldn't help but crack a smile when I listened to it. It was the store manager asking me to come in and work a full shift because of "problems they'd been having." You could almost hear the desperation in his voice. I knew my little scheme had worked. But sadly, I chose not to respond or come in for work that day. Even if I wanted to, I was pretty deep into a 6-pack at the time.

I got another call the following day, which this time I answered. Gee boss, I'm so sorry but I'm actually eight hours away at the beach right now. I thought going out of town would be a good idea since you said to treat this like a vacation. (Actually I was still in my PJ's, drinking coffee and watching Breaking Bad.)

The following day I did not get a phone call. poo poo Store had bused LP personnel in from other stores and had a police officer stand by the door. I'm sure the police department was happy to oblige, I can only imagine how many calls they got from poo poo Store over the past week.

When I went back after my week off was up, there were two new policies that were tacked right on to the bulletin board: at least one LP associate must be on the floor from open to close, and the quota was changed from # of stops per week to amount of money saved in a month, a much more flexible and reasonable quota that the four of us would have no problem meeting. Well, three of us actually, one of my fellow LP's made use of their week off by getting a new job, and good for them.

I never did learn the hard numbers on how much money hemorrhaged out of that store. I do know that it was in the six-figure range.

I thought about getting a new job myself, but it didn't prove to be necessary. I guess a company that cuts all LP's for a week must have deeper financial problems, because the whole chain folded two months later. I then got to spend my days drinking beer, watching Netflix, and getting paid unemployment for it. I ended up landing a new job with a private security firm that paid much better.

I ran into my shadier acquaintances showing off their new iPads a few days after this mess. I think I know how they got them.

TL;DR You cut the hours for all LP personnel, I let the shadiest people in town hear about it.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:07

Mr. Nemo: Feb 4, 2016; I wish I had a sister like my big strong Daddy

Were you looking for the poo poo that didn't happen thread?

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:25

Platystemon: Feb 13, 2012; BREADS

Mr. Nemo posted:

Were you looking for the poo poo that didn't happen thread?

It�s illustrative of the though processes of rentacops.

You know, like why they might tussle with people over $5 worth of merchandise.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:27

Say Nothing: Mar 5, 2013; by FactsAreUseless

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:42

Prokhor Zakharov: Dec 31, 2008; This is me as I make another great post

Good luck with your depression!

# ? Mar 17, 2017 00:53

Elohssa Gib: Aug 30, 2006; Easily Amused

Elizabethan Error posted:

Loss Prevention doesn't usually require a uniform, what are you expecting? the anti-theft people running around with handheld neon signs?

At one store I helped out at one of the LP guys wore a shirt that said Undercover, it was hilarious when the beer thieves found out it was true.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 01:00

Klaus Kinski: Nov 26, 2007; Der Klaus

Elizabethan Error posted:

Loss Prevention doesn't usually require a uniform, what are you expecting? the anti-theft people running around with handheld neon signs?

Yes? This probably ends up preventing more $ loss than occasionaly busting a random shoplifter.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 01:11

Foxhound: Sep 5, 2007

Bioware's character writing is like Rob Liefield's character drawing. You'd find characters with more depth in any given sonic fanfic.

whiteyfats posted:

I loved Dragon Age Origins, then played Dragon Ages 2. Yay, the same dungeon for the 92nd time! With dumbed down combat!

I liked DA:O too, but mostly it was because I missed Infinity Engine games. Bioware took a dump all over the one thing that made DA:O decent when they released DA2.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 01:22

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# ? May 16, 2024 00:04

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

DA2 is the best one, and the best video game of all time.

# ? Mar 17, 2017 01:36

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