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And definitely don't describe someone as 'an unrequited love' in the past, since that implies you're not over them. Be tactful and say, 'The guy under the Chevy Truck'
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Apr 27, 2017 21:57
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ArbitraryC posted:*in front of all your friends* How is this in any way remotely like, "lol my ex used to go crazy about olives, he once even got in a fight with a goddamned Subway sandwich artist about how many olives he was entitled to on his sandwich." Yeah of course it's rude to describe your sexual habits in casual conversation, with exes or with anybody. But if you can't hear the phrase, "my ex," without picturing hardcore sex, that's 100% on you.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:07
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There is a line between "My ex hates/loves olives and argued with subway man about it once" and "My ex used to plow my rear end in a top hat this way and it was good, please do the needful"
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Apr 27, 2017 22:12
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MF_James posted:There is a line between "My ex hates/loves olives and argued with subway man about it once" and "My ex used to plow my rear end in a top hat this way and it was good, please do the needful" yeah the former is a red flag for "holy poo poo you're boring"
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Apr 27, 2017 22:14
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My mother forebade the eating of pimento-stuffed olives because she considered them Sinful for their Representation of the Sphincter.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:17
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if you're participating in the extended debate about the ethics of telling your 'ex ordering a $5 footlong' anecdotal greatest hits dont front that you don't get the guy trying to turn extremely mundane conversations into a melodramatic flameout
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Apr 27, 2017 22:16
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I was just havin a bit of fun
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Apr 27, 2017 22:23
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Am I [20M] wrong for wanting to stop dating this girl [20F] because she licked me in public?quote:I feel like I've read a story like this on here before and now it has happened to me. I'm trying to figure out whether or not I'm being petty. 20-year-olds are so loving dumb 
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Apr 27, 2017 22:26
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ArbitraryC posted:I was just havin a bit of fun We already have Pick, we don't need another person intentionally shitposting. The unintentional ones are plentiful enough.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:26
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new phone who dis posted:Every woman is like a 1 in 100 chance lottery ticket only instead of winning money you get a chance to disappoint them and ruin their faith in humanity. The guy who did it to Pick seems to be really good at it. On paper it should have been a great love story, especially for him.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:34
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Pick posted:On paper it should have been a great love story, especially for him. He was bitter and jealous of your freakishly long functional legs.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:36
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Who What Now posted:He was bitter and jealous of your freakishly long functional legs. We were opposites in almost every physical way and I thought it was cute and cool and made for a good story. A dark-haired introverted kyphotic and a blonde extroverted arachnodactyl? Oh well, life is not a storybook.
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Apr 27, 2017 22:39
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Am I [20M] wrong for wanting to stop dating this girl [20F] because she licked me in public? Buy her a salt-lick, NEXT!
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Apr 27, 2017 22:44
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:Am I [20M] wrong for wanting to stop dating this girl [20F] because she licked me in public? so random xd rawr
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Apr 27, 2017 22:48
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Me [22 M] with my girlfriend[22F] of about two months. She lists off reasons why she dislikes me daily, before telling me how much she likes me and why she doesn't want me to leave.quote:This is the first time I've had a real, committed relationship she, on the other hand, has had several (bad from what I can tell) relationships that ended poorly. She has a lot of "triggers" that make her angry or distant and I try my best to avoid them, but its hard.
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Apr 27, 2017 23:17
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Pick posted:We were opposites in almost every physical way and I thought it was cute and cool and made for a good story. A dark-haired introverted kyphotic and a blonde extroverted arachnodactyl? Oh well, life is not a storybook. And people aren't baby birds.
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Apr 27, 2017 23:22
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new phone who dis posted:And people aren't baby birds. Well, birds are, when they're young.
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Apr 27, 2017 23:23
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new phone who dis posted:And people aren't baby birds. Oh that explains why people were getting mad when I started puking into their mouths! Thank you!
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Apr 27, 2017 23:27
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Haifisch posted:Me [22 M] with my girlfriend[22F] of about two months. She lists off reasons why she dislikes me daily, before telling me how much she likes me and why she doesn't want me to leave. 
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Apr 27, 2017 23:36
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My 19 year old daughter has no life. Is she normal?quote:I am a mother to both a 19 year old girl and a 6 year old. My 6 year old who is in kindergarten, requires a bit more attention than my adult daughter. quote:She's always on her phone and her computer. She's usually watching movies and videos. I'm not sure if she talks to people on the internet (she probably does). But maybe i really am jumping to conclusions here. Of course the comments are mostly 'this is fine, she's just introverted, internet social lives are a good enough substitute for irl social lives."
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Apr 27, 2017 23:50
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Older boyfriend (43M) and I (27F) relationship changing into dad-daughter stuff, I don't know how to make it go backquote:I've always liked older men, but this one is my oldest to date. We had a very romantic relationship in the beginning and I loved how stable and calm he was (compared to my other boyfriends at least.) Always surprised me with little things like buying me flowers, bringing home my favorite dessert, fixing random things that I would briefly mention I need to get done. I do admit his older age appealed to me because he was somewhat playfully authoritative with me and acted kind of dominantly.
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Apr 28, 2017 00:00
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From r/confessions It wasn't an accident quote:My boyfriend and I were together for almost three years. Over the last 6 months(?) he has been hanging out with this other girl. He assured me that she was just a friend and that I was being paranoid. Two weeks ago he broke up with me and told me that he wasn't "ready to settle down" but on Tuesday I found out that he was dating her. After I found out, I angrily sent some really embarrassing photos of him to his friends. I wasn't in the best frame of mind at the time and I wasn't thinking. I didn't hear anything from him until this morning. When he contacted me I planned on just saying "yes, I did it and I don't regret it" but when I saw his face and how upset he was I panicked and I ended up just pretending that I had no idea that I had sent them and that it was an accident. So what were these photos? quote:He was into femdom stuff in the bedroom and a few times he cross-dressed. I would help him put makeup on and he'd wear a wig, a dress, panties and stockings and he also put a cage thing on his penis. I wasn't all that into it but he liked it. I didn't send any of the photos with his penis cage or with him in panties. I sent the ones where he's in full makeup while wearing a dress and he's sucking on a dildo. Those photos are less embarrassing than the other ones but I know that they're still really bad. Again, I know that it was wrong and I feel terrible about it. I've never seen him so upset with me before. To be honest, I'm still hoping that we can forget all of this and get back together.
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Apr 28, 2017 00:00
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Patrick Spens posted:From r/confessions hopefully they live in california or something and she can get sent to jail for revenge porn lol
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Apr 28, 2017 00:03
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ArbitraryC posted:hopefully they live in california or something and she can get sent to jail for revenge porn lol I'm not sure those pictures would qualify as pornographic unless his genitals were visible.
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Apr 28, 2017 00:06
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Hell hath no fury. Why do idiots allow digital photos and video of themselves in compromising situations?
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Apr 28, 2017 01:12
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Pick posted:We were opposites in almost every physical way and I thought it was cute and cool and made for a good story. A dark-haired introverted kyphotic and a blonde extroverted arachnodactyl? Oh well, life is not a storybook. You dated Quasimodo? Eh... I've probably dated worse.
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Apr 28, 2017 01:20
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ArbitraryC posted:hopefully they live in california or something and she can get sent to jail for revenge porn lol if not revenge porn i feel like this is a tort of some kind
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Apr 28, 2017 01:22
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I'd laugh forever if someone posted a compromising picture of one of my friends in drag suckin a dildo.
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Apr 28, 2017 01:30
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Koyaanisgoatse posted:if not revenge porn i feel like this is a tort of some kind Would be hard to prove damages.
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Apr 28, 2017 02:03
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Zeroisanumber posted:Would be hard to prove damages. Just show the pic to the jury and prove the damage when they laugh their balls off.
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Apr 28, 2017 02:06
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here's a new smilie for y'all 
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Apr 28, 2017 02:06
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My[30M] girlfriend[28F] is suing me, how can we get through this?quote:Not looking for judgement here, just advice on how to get through small bumps in relationships.
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Apr 28, 2017 03:59
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:My[30M] girlfriend[28F] is suing me, how can we get through this? What the gently caress did he do to the dog? And why are they still together?
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Apr 28, 2017 04:26
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Bored posted:What the gently caress did he do to the dog? And why are they still together?
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Apr 28, 2017 04:32
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:My[30M] girlfriend[28F] is suing me, how can we get through this? "my SO is suing me in a court of law but we're going to stick by each other"
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Apr 28, 2017 04:37
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I don't think there's any level a relationship (romantic or otherwise) can get to that's worse than "solving our differences in a court of law". Just break up, for gently caress's sake. Though I am pretty partial to making life miserable for people who mistreat animals or whatever that guy did - I am assuming it is serious enough for litigation to be involved after all -, so screw him. I mean, how dumb do you need to be to date someone suing you, FFS.
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Apr 28, 2017 04:45
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Bored posted:What the gently caress did he do to the dog? And why are they still together? poor colby
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Apr 28, 2017 04:55
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ZearothK posted:I don't think there's any level a relationship (romantic or otherwise) can get to that's worse than "solving our differences in a court of law". Just break up, for gently caress's sake. Though I am pretty partial to making life miserable for people who mistreat animals or whatever that guy did - I am assuming it is serious enough for litigation to be involved after all -, so screw him. quote:I know it sounds weird, but we thought this would solve things if there were a third party involved. That way we couldn't blame each other later on A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 05:12 on Apr 28, 2017 |
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Apr 28, 2017 05:09
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A Wizard of Goatse posted:My[30M] girlfriend[28F] is suing me, how can we get through this? i know we throw the word 'cuck' around lightly in tyool 2017 but dating someone who is literally pursuing litigation against you is about as cuck as you can get without berthing el pup
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Apr 28, 2017 05:09
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Bored posted:What the gently caress did he do to the dog? And why are they still together? please take a minute to dream up the weirdest thing you think it could possibly be before clicking, based on what you already know of these two very sane individuals I was told by /r/dogs to take my post over here. I am a very experience dog owner but my girlfriend is... unappreciable, at best. She currently has some sort of bizarre doodle breed she paid $10,000 for (I wish I was kidding, folks) and this dog is insane. Zero training, the thing didn't even know sit when I met him. I have since trained him and he's decently behaved around me. She still lets him run wild around her. The dog is massively overweight despite my best measures because every time I increase his exercise my girlfriend increases his food. Speaking of, she only feeds him hot dogs. As in she cooks hot dogs, puts them in buns, adds toppings and then feeds him about 5-6 per meal three times a day. I don't know how he is still alive. I try to feed him kibble but she continues to sneak the hot dogs behind my back. I started keeping guard in the kitchen, throwing out any hot dogs that appear in the fridge but she still managed to stuff him full with them. I've gone so far as to camp out in front of the fridge for 2 weeks straight and she bought a mini fridge behind my back and hid it in the cabana. Stuffed full with hot dogs. I finally taught the dog to potty train despite her best efforts. She will not let him play with other dogs because she is very overprotective of diseases and doesn't even let him go outside (I have to exercise him when she's gone or very early before she wakes up). I've started sneaking him away during the day to a training facility so he can be socialized under the inspection of a trainer. She refuses to cut the dogs hair so it's a dirty matted rag walking around. She says dogs in the wild don't cut their hair and she won't either. INSANITY. So last week while she was at work I shaved the dog's hair off. She came home and had a complete meltdown, screaming and sobbing uncontrollable. She ran outside and gathered all the hair and is keeping it in a box on our kitchen table. And has since rejected the dog and instead pets the shaved hair. This morning she threw away a $60 bag of dog food and told me the dog must've eaten it overnight and would need hot dogs until we could get more. I have her on camera throwing away the entire bag that I paid for. This isn't the first time. She's tried to hide and throw away his leashes several times so I couldn't walk him among other things.
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Apr 28, 2017 05:20
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