UKMT General Elextravaganza 2017: Lord Buckethead would have won

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Debate & Discussion > UKMT General Elextravaganza 2017: Lord Buckethead would have won

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What is the best flav... you all know what this question is: This poll is closed.
Labour	907	49.92%
Theresa May Team (Conservative)	48	2.64%
Liberal Democrats	31	1.71%
UKIP	13	0.72%
Plaid Cymru	25	1.38%
Green	22	1.21%
Scottish Socialist Party	12	0.66%
Scottish Conservative Party	1	0.06%
Scottish National Party	59	3.25%
Some Kind of Irish Unionist	4	0.22%
Alliance / Irish Nonsectarian	3	0.17%
Some Kind of Irish Nationalist	36	1.98%
Misc. Far Left Trots	35	1.93%
Misc. Far Right Fash	8	0.44%
Monster Raving Loony	49	2.70%
Space Navies Party	39	2.15%
Independent / Single Issue	2	0.11%
Can't Vote	188	10.35%
Won't Vote	8	0.44%
Spoiled Ballot	15	0.83%
Pissflaps	312	17.17%
Total:	1817 votes

[Edit Poll (moderators only)]

Mugsbaloney: Jul 11, 2012; We prefer your extinction to the loss of our job

Zephro posted:

I like this image, but what's the cartoon it's originally from?

https://img.4plebs.org/boards/pol/image/1455/78/1455784084223.jpg

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:03

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# ? May 14, 2024 06:40

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

learnincurve posted:

Building new tracks between major cities does not solve that problem. It does however solve a major problem for people who have expense accounts. Now they can get to London from Birmingham 20 mins quicker and all of the plebs will be on the other slow train so they won't have to worry about encountering them. Huzzah, three cheers for the Tory party.

Fifty percent of the country live in the seven largest urban areas. You can cover thirty million people with six rail links. That's the whole point of cities: the same amount of stuff can cover more people. The next six rail links cost just as much and cover six million people. Look, here's a chart:

Incidentally, guess where the plebs all live. Hint: it's not in villages in Derbyshire. If someone can't afford rail travel, the solution is to subsidize their tickets, not build a shitload of track to nowhere.

coffeetable fucked around with this message at 09:13 on Jun 20, 2017

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:04

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

As an aside, the main value in HS2 isn't the reduction in transit time, it's the improvements in capacity. It's marketed on the transit time though because capacity is harder to explain.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:10

Miftan: Mar 31, 2012; Terry knows what he can do with his bloody chocolate orange...

coffeetable posted:

As an aside, the main value in HS2 isn't the reduction in transit time, it's the improvements in capacity. It's marketed on the transit time though because capacity is harder to explain.

"You know how trains are poo poo because you have to be smushed into someone's armpit? Now you'll actually get a seat"

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:13

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

Temp last night was 25. I think I got around 3 hours sleep from 2-5 am.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:15

coffeetable: Feb 5, 2006; TELL ME AGAIN HOW GREAT BRITAIN WOULD BE IF IT WAS RULED BY THE MERCILESS JACKBOOT OF PRINCE CHARLES

YES I DO TALK TO PLANTS ACTUALLY

Hourly capacity:

code:

		Now	HS2
Slow commuter	3,900	6,500	
Fast commuter	1,600	6,800
Intercity	5,800	1,800	
High speed	0	19,800	
Total		11,300	34,900

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:18

learnincurve: May 15, 2014; Smoosh

Coffeetable entirely missing the point of why we connect small towns and villages to cities there. Hey, how about we cut all the branch lines to the Home Counties off for a week and see what happens.

Firstly, commuting. Improve the infrastructure to a small town so people can actually get there then they can offer lower business rates in order to tempt companies away from the big cities. This then spreads the wealth and jobs around the whole country and does not just concentrate it in a few places.

Secondly, tourism.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:20

learnincurve: May 15, 2014; Smoosh

coffeetable posted:

Hourly capacity:

code:

		Now	HS2
Slow commuter	3,900	6,500	
Fast commuter	1,600	6,800
Intercity	5,800	1,800	
High speed	0	19,800	
Total		11,300	34,900

An none of them will be the poors. If you cannot run the trains you have so people on an average wage can afford them then you absolutely should not be building trains that are more expensive. All you are doing is using the poor to subsidise the rich. That's how much they can hold, how may tickets will actually be sold.

It's like we learned nothing from concord

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:23

BCR: Jan 23, 2011

So far I've learnt that English people like complaining about the weather, and are autistic about the content of a breakfast, train lines.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:24

Maw: Feb 18, 2013; Mere minutes after discovering the new technology, it was used to send me a crude ASCII dong.

BCR posted:

So far I've learnt that English people like complaining about the weather, and are autistic about the content of a breakfast, train lines.

Ever tried eating breakfast on a train on a hot day?

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:24

BCR: Jan 23, 2011

Yep, it was pretty good.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:26

Maw: Feb 18, 2013; Mere minutes after discovering the new technology, it was used to send me a crude ASCII dong.

BCR posted:

Yep, it was pretty good.

Huh, this looks great

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:28

Kokoro Wish: Jul 23, 2007; Post? What post? Oh wow.
I had nothing to do with THAT.

Jippa posted:

Temp last night was 25. I think I got around 3 hours sleep from 2-5 am.

Where I live right now, that's actually considered refreshingly cool and my feet get chilly in the evenings if it goes below that.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:28

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

BCR posted:

So far I've learnt that English people like complaining about the weather, and are autistic about the content of a breakfast, train lines.

Are you caveman that has been thawed out of a glacier and is trying to get his head around this crazy new world he finds himself in? We need to make an 80's teen high school movie about this.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:29

BCR: Jan 23, 2011

I thought in this brave new world of the 21st century things might have moved on a tad.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:30

DancingShade: Jul 26, 2007; by Fluffdaddy

Maw posted:

Ever tried eating breakfast on a train on a hot day?

I'm imagining a 35 degree Celsius day, no air conditioning and a red faced sweating gentleman in a 3 piece woolen suit and bowler hat trying to juggle a bowl of hot porridge, a plate of buttered jam toast and a cup & saucer of hot coffee on top of his leather bound briefcase.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:31

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

learnincurve posted:

Hey, how about we cut all the branch lines to the Home Counties off for a week and see what happens.

Sounds good. How would we go about doing that?

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:31

Regarde Aduck: Oct 19, 2012; c l o u d k i t t e n; Grimey Drawer

BCR posted:

I thought in this brave new world of the 21st century things might have moved on a tad.

Britain peaked in like 1999. We've been going backwards since Blair took us into Iraq.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:32

MikeCrotch: Nov 5, 2011; I AM UNJUSTIFIABLY PROUD OF MY SPAGHETTI BOLOGNESE RECIPE

YES, IT IS AN INCREDIBLY SIMPLE DISH

NO, IT IS NOT NORMAL TO USE A PEPPERAMI INSTEAD OF MINCED MEAT

YES, THERE IS TOO MUCH SALT IN MY RECIPE

NO, I WON'T STOP SHARING IT

more like BOLLOCKnese

learnincurve posted:

An none of them will be the poors. If you cannot run the trains you have so people on an average wage can afford them then you absolutely should not be building trains that are more expensive. All you are doing is using the poor to subsidise the rich. That's how much they can hold, how may tickets will actually be sold.

It's like we learned nothing from concord

What is your proposed solution to the fact that the West Coast Main Line is at 95% capacity with demand still increasing, the problem of mixed traffic on the line reducing potential efficiency and the fact that upgrading WCML would cost the same as building HS2 with considerably more disruption?

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:33

ronya: Nov 8, 2010; I'm the normal one.

You hate ridden fucks will regret your words when you eventually grow up.

Peace.

commuter towns?

not sure why subsidising suburban sprawl is a public policy interest

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:34

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

Kokoro Wish posted:

Where I live right now, that's actually considered refreshingly cool and my feet get chilly in the evenings if it goes below that.

In siberia, in -40 conditions you are allowed to wear a ushanka but you aren't allowed to have the flaps down or the local men will think you are weak.

Jippa fucked around with this message at 09:39 on Jun 20, 2017

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:36

Zephro: Nov 23, 2000; I suppose I could part with one and still be feared...

Mugsbaloney posted:

https://img.4plebs.org/boards/pol/image/1455/78/1455784084223.jpg

Thanks!

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:38

Kurtofan: Feb 16, 2011; hon hon hon

Jippa posted:

In siberia, in -40 conditions you are allowed to wear a ushanka but the you aren't allowed to have the flaps down or the local men will think you are weak.

this is bad for pissflaps

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:39

DeadButDelicious: Oct 11, 2012; Leave me to do my dark bidding on the internet!

Hey how about some news to get the blood boiling?

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/jun/20/change-of-prime-minister-not-on-the-agenda-says-chris-grayling

So they don't have a workable majority, there's no formal coalition or supply & confidence agreement with the DUP, which may not happen until after the Queen's Speech, which has been delayed until next year...

... How is this anything resembling a legitimate government again?

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:41

Maw: Feb 18, 2013; Mere minutes after discovering the new technology, it was used to send me a crude ASCII dong.

DancingShade posted:

I'm imagining a 35 degree Celsius day, no air conditioning and a red faced sweating gentleman in a 3 piece woolen suit and bowler hat trying to juggle a bowl of hot porridge, a plate of buttered jam toast and a cup & saucer of hot coffee on top of his leather bound briefcase.

What is this 'coffee' nonsense? Tea or get out

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:44

OwlFancier: Aug 22, 2013

DeadButDelicious posted:

Hey how about some news to get the blood boiling?

https://www.theguardian.com/politics/2017/jun/20/change-of-prime-minister-not-on-the-agenda-says-chris-grayling

So they don't have a workable majority, there's no formal coalition or supply & confidence agreement with the DUP, which may not happen until after the Queen's Speech, which has been delayed until next year...

... How is this anything resembling a legitimate government again?

No the speech is this year, soon, it's next year that they aren't having one.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:45

DeadButDelicious: Oct 11, 2012; Leave me to do my dark bidding on the internet!

Oh that makes more sense. Confused myself with a headline I read about it. Doh!

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:47

Intrinsic Field Marshal: Sep 6, 2014; by SA Support Robot

Pochoclo posted:

What a world we live in, where an old poor person would have to go to jail to get some measure of care.

Its not that too uncommon to see the homeless commit crimes so they get sent to jail than spend another night on the street

# ? Jun 20, 2017 09:55

sassassin: Apr 3, 2010; by Azathoth

ronya posted:

commuter towns?

not sure why subsidising suburban sprawl is a public policy interest

Because over-stuffed cities provide a miserable quality of life to their inhabitants.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:01

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

It'd save a lot of time and money if we built them something like a prison but without all the expensive bits like guards and bars and high security fences and let them spend time in it at a much reduced public expense without them having to commit a crime.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:02

Intrinsic Field Marshal: Sep 6, 2014; by SA Support Robot

Guavanaut posted:

It'd save a lot of time and money if we built them something like a prison but without all the expensive bits like guards and bars and high security fences and let them spend time in it at a much reduced public expense without them having to commit a crime.

hol up are you saying we need to bring back the

WORK HOUSES?

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:06

Guavanaut: Nov 27, 2009; Looking At Them Tittys
1969 - 1998; Toilet Rascal

I was thinking something like that, except without the mandatory work requirement. The state of Utah tried something like that for their homeless population, I think they called it just houses.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:09

Kill All Cops: Apr 11, 2007; Pacheco de Chocobo; Hell Gem

Regarde Aduck posted:

Britain peaked in like 1999. We've been going backwards since Blair took us into Iraq.

hosed up but true, Spice Girls was peak Britane

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:10

Loving Africa Chaps: Dec 3, 2007; We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

ONS have started publishing regional fiscal transfers so how mch each reason either pays or recieves per person and how much revenue per person each place generates and recieves

https://www.ons.gov.uk/economy/governmentpublicsectorandtaxes/publicsectorfinance/articles/countryandregionalpublicsectorfinances/2015to2016

1. Main points

London, South East and East of England all had net fiscal surpluses in the financial year ending (FYE) 2016 with all other countries and regions of the UK having net fiscal deficits.
London had the highest net fiscal surplus per person at �3,070 and Northern Ireland the highest net fiscal deficit per person at �5,440, in FYE 2016.
London raised the most revenue per person, in FYE 2016, at �15,750 with Wales and the North East raising the least revenue per person at �7,980 and �8,200 respectively.
Northern Ireland and Scotland attracted the highest expenditure per person, FYE 2016, at �14,020 and �13,050 respectively, with the lowest expenditure per person attributed to the South East and East of England at �10,580 and �10,590 per person

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:10

kustomkarkommando: Oct 22, 2012

The fact the DUP have signalled their support of a queens speech but are still negotiating supply indicates their mains asks are going to be budgetary rather than legislative, already talk is circling of a focus on an extra £1bn in NHS funding to cut waiting lists (NI is the worst performer in the UK for NHS waiting lists and general practice is on the brink of total collapse - as in all GPs have threatened to resign from the NHS this summer collapse) and a 50% cut in air passenger duty (broadly supported by most parties bar the greens but previously ruled out due to the funds it would remove from the block grant) as well as top-up funding to mitigate the reduction in block grant from a regional reduction in corporation tax (mandated under the Azores rule whole were in the EU)

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:13

DesperateDan: Dec 10, 2005; Where's my cow?

Is that my cow?

No it isn't, but it still tramples my bloody lavender.

That panorama.

loving hell. :smith:

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:13

Loving Africa Chaps: Dec 3, 2007; We had not left it yet, but when I would wake in the night, I would lie, listening, homesick for it already.

learnincurve posted:

Oh now. You have literally no idea what beeching did to everywhere outside the Home Counties if you throw that argument back at me. What we need is all the little towns and villages connected to each other and to major cities, if not by train then the bus service must be improved to compensate. I would complain about Derbyshire being split into two and it taking 4 hours to travel 20 miles by train, but then I look at wales and think "poor bastards".

Building new tracks between major cities does not solve that problem. It does however solve a major problem for people who have expense accounts. Now they can get to London from Birmingham 20 mins quicker and all of the plebs will be on the other slow train so they won't have to worry about encountering them. Huzzah, three cheers for the Tory party.

It doesn't solve a problem to people with expense accounts because those people are already sitting in first class or at a table doing work over wifi or 4g so the extra 20 minutes saved it's a big deal

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:17

Intrinsic Field Marshal: Sep 6, 2014; by SA Support Robot

Loving Africa Chaps posted:

[*]Northern Ireland and Scotland attracted the highest expenditure per person, FYE 2016, at �14,020 and �13,050 respectively, with the lowest expenditure per person attributed to the South East and East of England at �10,580 and �10,590 per person
[/list]

Good to see taxpayer money funding the magic bucky and methadone tree

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:19

Playstation 4: Apr 25, 2014; Unlockable Ben

What is it with you bloody Limeys and tree analogies? Is it just "it's one letter of off tea and we love that poo poo"?

If you have to state the obvious, :thejoke:

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:23

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# ? May 14, 2024 06:40

Jippa: Feb 13, 2009

Playstation 4 posted:

What is it with you bloody Limeys and tree analogies? Is it just "it's one letter of off tea and we love that poo poo"?

If you have to state the obvious,

I love trees.

# ? Jun 20, 2017 10:25

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