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DragQueenofAngmar
Dec 29, 2009

You shall not pass!
I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult

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maskenfreiheit
Dec 30, 2004

But Rocks Hurt Head posted:

I took the drug accusation to be a pretty damning indictment of her own use

she didn't put the bath salts in the bath

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult

I agree with you but I also think people have the right to not like certain things. My last girlfriend refused to eat eel, for example. I personally cannot stand most Indian food.

Haifisch
Nov 13, 2010

Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!



Taco Defender

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult
The sad thing about the "it's just how they are, man" comments is that it's bullshit. I was a picky eater as a kid/teen. Then I grew the gently caress up and realized the world wouldn't explode if I ate some tikka masala or a pizza with toppings on it.

Then again I was willing to eat broccoli from the start. Maybe there's a correlation there.

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

Jim Barris posted:

I agree with you but I also think people have the right to not like certain things. My last girlfriend refused to eat eel, for example. I personally cannot stand most Indian food.

it's ok to have preferences but if you're going into a sulk or refusing to at least meet the host halfway on the rare occasions you're presented with a food that won't make you sick but isn't of your choice that's pretty much ridiculous toddler behavior. a big part of being a functioning adult is being able to adapt and not have your way sometimes without it being a big production

A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 01:51 on Jun 21, 2017

Lonely Virgil
Oct 9, 2012

You don't understand anything that touches lettuce is ruined forever! In fact tomatoes too and onions. Also mustard and ketchup. Matter of fact the cheese and the burger too. I'll just have the bun, please and thank you.

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult

Wanna go out with me? I'll be upfront with you, I'm in it for the food.

Lonely Virgil
Oct 9, 2012

I'm the guy that wants to go to TGI Fridays while the entire group wants to check out the new tapas bar.

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

it's ok to have preferences but if you're going into a sulk or refusing to at least meet the host halfway on the rare occasions you're presented with a food that won't make you sick but isn't of your choice that's pretty much ridiculous toddler behavior. part of being a functioning adult is being able to adapt and not have your way sometimes without it being a big production
You are, of course, right. If I showed up at someones home after being invited to dinner and they were like 'surprise, we're gonna eat a whole bunch of curry' I'd be disappointed but I'd suck it up and eat it so as not to be rude. I think it's reasonable to expect someone to at least try eating something before they decide they don't like it, as well.

Cough Drop The Beat
Jan 22, 2012

by Lowtax

Jim Barris posted:

I agree with you but I also think people have the right to not like certain things. My last girlfriend refused to eat eel, for example. I personally cannot stand most Indian food.

As someone who loves food and is very adventurous, I agree. If someone dislikes broccoli most of the time, it's one thing. I don't care about people having certain tastes. That's fine. But it's childish rear end in a top hat bullshit if a person is picky to the point of eating very few foods (the white as hell "I eat burgers, pasta, and pizza only etc" idiot) or refuses to try new dishes and cuisines. It's even worse if they embarrass their partner, family members, or friends with their picky garbage habits.

It shows a complete lack of maturity and life experience too. Who wants to date a 12 year old who refuses to check out a new restaurant or who orders chicken tenders or bland pasta at every meal?

Cough Drop The Beat fucked around with this message at 02:01 on Jun 21, 2017

Samuel L. ACKSYN
Feb 29, 2008


i dont like broccoli because when i was little i ate a shitload of broccoli and then puked everywhere and now the smell/taste of broccoli makes me feel vomity

chitoryu12
Apr 24, 2014

Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

i dont like broccoli because when i was little i ate a shitload of broccoli and then puked everywhere and now the smell/taste of broccoli makes me feel vomity

This is me with bananas.

Lonely Virgil
Oct 9, 2012

I no joke don't like sushi but if the group I'm with wants sushi I would eat some cooked ones.

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider
I don't like cheeses for the most part. Like cheddar, Swiss, mozzarella, Parmesan, that's all good. But blue cheese, goat cheese, etc. just doesn't do it for me and I don't know why. :shrug:

spite house
Apr 28, 2009

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult
I'm a food enthusiast and used to be in love -- bigtime, no-poo poo, cosmic, capital-L Love -- with a picky eater. Sometimes he was in love with me too, but the timing never worked out, or geography didn't, or maybe we both realized independently that Love or no Love, if we got together we'd end up on the news, so we just pined. This went on for years. Finally I decided to make a concerted effort to get over him and move on with my life, and what did it was a dinner at a nice steakhouse, watching him herd his creamed spinach onto a bread plate and move it waaaay over to the edge of the table so he wouldn't even have to look at it. I asked myself whether I wanted to deal with that nonsense forever, and the answer was "gently caress no". It worked a trick.

Nowadays we're very good friends and neighbors, and I enjoy cooking for him sometimes and sneaking foods I knows he hates (most of them) into his dinner without him knowing.

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009

Cough Drop The Beat posted:

As someone who loves food and is very adventurous, I agree. If someone dislikes broccoli most of the time, it's one thing. I don't care about people having certain tastes. That's fine. But it's childish rear end in a top hat bullshit if a person is picky to the point of eating very few foods (the white as hell "I eat burgers, pasta, and pizza only etc" idiot) or refuses to try new dishes and cuisines. It's even worse if they embarrass their partner, family members, or friends with their picky garbage habits.

It shows a complete lack of maturity and life experience too. Who wants to date a 12 year old who refuses to check out a new restaurant or who orders chicken tenders or bland pasta at every meal?

Yeah it is embarrassing when you take your SO to a fancy place and they basically end up ordering off the kids menu. You just know that the waiter is back there yucking it up with the busboy about it.

Yorkshire Pudding
Nov 24, 2006



Samuel L. ACKSYN posted:

i dont like broccoli because when i was little i ate a shitload of broccoli and then puked everywhere and now the smell/taste of broccoli makes me feel vomity

I had the exact same experience with cauliflower and baked beans when I was like 5 years old. My insane old woman babysitter made me eat a big plate of cauliflower and baked beans for lunch despite my insistence I didn't feel well, and after eating it all I promptly vomited all over the floor. She got mad at me and made me clean it up myself and then made me go sit alone in a room for the rest of the day. Cauliflower in particular still makes me gag.

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post

Yorkshire Pudding posted:

I had the exact same experience with cauliflower and baked beans when I was like 5 years old. My insane old woman babysitter made me eat a big plate of cauliflower and baked beans for lunch despite my insistence I didn't feel well, and after eating it all I promptly vomited all over the floor. She got mad at me and made me clean it up myself and then made me go sit alone in a room for the rest of the day. Cauliflower in particular still makes me gag.

Was she trying to get you to shart yourself as well. Beans AND cauliflower!

FuckenPunchOn
Nov 9, 2013

maskenfreiheit posted:

Why has this guy blocked me?! I am stunned!

This reads like clickbait. "She Took It Too Slow With An Older Guy Who Just Wanted To gently caress! You'll Never Believe What Happened Next!"

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009
I can't eat cup ramen for that reason. I'm pretty sure cup ramen is gross, anyway.

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

Nobody actually cares what I like to eat, or don't like to eat, except the people preparing my food!

Me [27 F] with my husband [30 M] 5 years, his friends apologize when they hear we're having a girl.

quote:

My husband was in a fraternity back in college and has stayed friends with the vast majority of the people he was in the fraternity with.

Hubby and I have been trying for kids for a while now, and our first is due in November. We're beyond excited. He's been wonderful preparing and has been very excited, both for the baby and that it's going to be a baby girl. We've known our baby is going to be a girl for a while, and we only recently began telling friends that we're pregnant (family has known for a while).

Most everyone we tell has been excited, but almost every single time we tell one of his old fraternity brothers, the conversation goes like this:

Husband: "Yeah, we're having a baby in November!"
Friend: "Oh my god! That's awesome! I'm so excited for you two!"
Husband: "Yep, a baby girl!"
Friend: "Oh, well I'm sorry about that part [laughs], but congrats."
Husband: "[Laughs awkwardly] Thanks."

I'm seriously on the verge of telling the next guy who says that to gently caress off, pouring a drink on his head, and keying his car. Who says that poo poo??

Am I overreacting? These people who have always been so nice to me/us are suddenly misogynistic jerks when they hear our baby's sex. I've even heard phone conversations he's had with long-distance friends who joke about how he better not let her go to college/frat parties because he "knows what happens there" and one guy even went so far as to "joke" that he could always bail because I'm the only one actually stuck with her.

I'm beside myself and don't know what the gently caress to do.

Jim Barris
Aug 13, 2009
Wow, what the gently caress? Does that sound as bizarre to everyone else as it does to me?

Yorkshire Pudding
Nov 24, 2006



La Brea Carpet posted:

Was she trying to get you to shart yourself as well. Beans AND cauliflower!

I think she had some sort of dementia, or some problems. I wasn't at that place very long, but she did a few more insane things.

We used to watch movies after lunch, probably to get us to take a nap, and one time she decided it was good for the young children to watch Child's Play. She asked me, a 5 year old, if "my parents allowed me to watch horror movies". Having no idea what that meant, and knowing the other option was being forced to play alone in the basement which other kids told me was haunted, I said I could watch them. Cue me having terrible nightmares about Chucky the killer doll for the next 7 years.

christmas boots
Oct 15, 2012

To these sing-alongs 🎤of siren 🧜🏻‍♀️songs
To oohs😮 to ahhs😱 to 👏big👏applause👏
With all of my 😡anger I scream🤬 and shout📢
🇺🇸America🦅, I love you 🥰but you're freaking 💦me 😳out
Biscuit Hider
Push them into traffic

"Oh I'm sorry about that"

Blue Train
Jun 17, 2012

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Nobody actually cares what I like to eat, or don't like to eat, except the people preparing my food!

Me [27 F] with my husband [30 M] 5 years, his friends apologize when they hear we're having a girl.

Greek life is poo poo

La Brea Carpet
Nov 22, 2007

I have no mouth and I must post

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Nobody actually cares what I like to eat, or don't like to eat, except the people preparing my food!

Me [27 F] with my husband [30 M] 5 years, his friends apologize when they hear we're having a girl.

"Dude hope she's hot in 18 years HAHA"

Is something I've heard said before. Somehow that person didn't get punched.

Doc Hawkins
Jun 15, 2010

Dashing? But I'm not even moving!


DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult

100% agreed, and I'mma steal this strat. I've met people who won't eat sushi, who won't eat mussels?! I don't want to put them in re-education camps or anything, I just don't want to ever have to share a home table with them. Or travel with them! The mind reels! Just order the congee with extra pig's blood, and grade their reaction like a culinary voight-kampf test.

hawowanlawow
Jul 27, 2009

dude should have used the gender reveal to make them all pound smirnoff ices


ICED

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

quote:

> Am I overreacting?
Yes.
> These people who have always been so nice to me/us are suddenly misogynistic jerks when they hear our baby's sex.
No.

It isn't misogynist to prefer a male or female baby. There is nothing wrong with having preferences.
It's pretty normal for men to want a son because they can play baseball together, he can teach the man "guy things", and all sorts of other reasons.
Likewise, I hope my first child is a girl because I want to spoil my daughter. Am I now sexist too because I want a girl instead of a boy?
You have to realize that it's completely normal to have a preference.

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Reddit

maskenfreiheit
Dec 30, 2004

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

I dated two picky eaters in the last couple years and if you're a person who enjoys cooking and food it's so loving depressing. I legit take all first dates to "weird" or "adventurous" restaurants now because gently caress picky eaters. If you don't eat more than like 10 specific foods and it's not for allergy or ethics reasons then you are legitimately not an adult

i usually liked to use this indian place in undergrad since if they are vegetarian or vegan there's good stuff and if they don't like indian food i could pretend to go to the bathroom and go out the back door

therobit
Aug 19, 2008

I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Reddit

Lol because apparently girls can't play catch, work on cars, or do yard work. BRB I have to tell my daughter she needs to come inside and do needlepoint instead of helping her mom mow the lawn.

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

that guy's friends are so loving disappointed they won't get to teach his son to play catch

blarzgh
Apr 14, 2009

SNITCHIN' RANDY
Grimey Drawer

GRINDCORE MEGGIDO posted:

Holy gently caress, I hope my brother doesn't die. Mostly because his wife's a troll.

If my brother dies, do I inheret all the fat chicks from his tinder account?

blarzgh
Apr 14, 2009

SNITCHIN' RANDY
Grimey Drawer
The frat boys are being a little crass about it, but it's not that weird for your friends to give you a hard time about the gender of the baby.

Most men like to bust each other's balls about whatevers the most readily available subject.

Zil
Jun 4, 2011

Satanically Summoned Citrus


blarzgh posted:

If my brother dies, do I inheret all the fat chicks from his tinder account?

Only if he dies on a leap year during a full moon.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

that guy's friends are so loving disappointed they won't get to teach his son to play catch

No matter the gender they gotta wait 18 years for that.

A Wizard of Goatse
Dec 14, 2014

blarzgh posted:

If my brother dies, do I inheret all the fat chicks from his tinder account?

This is the Law, to ensure all the fat girls of the tribe are cared for

Dunning Krugerrand
Dec 23, 2015

purestrain pyrite



My husband (26m) and I (25F) cannot agree on names for our unborn son

quote:

We've been together since we were 14, married three years ago. He's from a rooted Midwestern family and I'm the child of immigrants from Kerala, India. I kept my maiden name. We eat both cuisines, trade off on holidays, and both families get along fine.

I'm 6 months pregnant with a baby boy He'll have his surname, which is very American. Husband, Brad Richard for example is a junior and wants our son to be the the third Brad Richard I don't want to do this. We've agreed to only have one child, and it feels like a betrayal of my culture to give this half brown baby a fully American name. I feel like if we were having a daughter id have free reign, but he's dead set on making our son Brad Richard III.

Most South Indian names don't go great with American surnames, I get that (one of the reasons I kept my own name), but I feel like we could reach a compromise. But this means a lot to him and the family, this will likely be the only grandchild his parents will have.

I'm also worried that this is his first step in whitewashing our child. I've made a lot of compromises but it's getting to a point where I feel the need to take a stand.

Advice?

tl;dr husband wants to give son his full name, but I want something from my culture.

Update 1

quote:

I don't think I can win here. Yesterday my MIL and FIL came over with a bunch of monogrammed onesies and other baby items with "Brad Richard Smith" or BRS, etc. my husband accepted them graciously. When they left I started to cry and I told him that I didn't want our baby to be named Brad and I begged him to look at the list of South Indian baby names I made. At this point I would've taken a middle name. He didn't budge. He's normally very reasonable, but he won't consider any alternatives. It looks like I've lost.

tl;dr Our baby is going to be Brad Richard Smith and there's nothing I can do about it.

Update 2

quote:

Quick update. I just checked into a motel about a half hour from my house. I called my husband, emailed him my list of baby names, and said he had to pick one as either first or middle or I won't be coming home. He said to give him the night to think.

We'll see what happens. If he says no, I don't really know what I'll do. I don't know if I'm bluffing at this point. I'm lonely, sad, and want my husband back (the caring, open minded husband I had before this name debacle).

tl;dr: In hotel, gave husband ultimatum. Awaiting response. Very scared.

Finale

quote:

There's some good news and some bad news.

First, my husband came to see me the next morning after I moved into the hotel. He hugged me, apologized for his behavior, and gave me a small wrapped present. I opened it, and inside was one of the monogrammed onesies. I was about to pitch a fit until I saw that he had crossed out the "BRS" with permanent marker and wrote, in his big ugly handwriting, Arjun Bradley.

I cried right there and held him. On my baby name sheet I had ranked the twelve names I liked, with Arjun being number one. I'm so grateful that he chose that name. I asked why he didn't go with Bradley Arjun, and he said after a lot of thought he liked the flow of this better, plus he didn't want to call the baby Brad. This confused me, since he had been calling my belly Brad for months. I told him I needed an explanation for his behavior and he gave me one.

Sure enough, it was his parents. As soon as they found out we were having a son, they were on his back about Brad Richard Smith. His two other siblings won't be having children (one is married/childfree and the other is a lesbian), so they were insistent that the only grandchild on that side carries on the family tradition. He didn't want to fight them, because there has been a lot of strain between them over the years. He convinced himself that he wanted a child named Brad Richard and convinced me as well. I told him that it doesn't excuse the way he undermined me as a parent, and he apologized for that.

He also told me that he was internalizing some worry about having a mixed race child. It makes him a little sad that the child will likely not look like him, and he worried about how the kid will be perceived in society. I told him that we should enter couples counseling to talk about our future as an interracial family, and he agreed. I mean, we're not fighting anymore, but it's always nice to talk things out.

In the car ride home I was bursting with joy about my little Arjun. My husband seemed to be getting used to it, calling my belly "RJ" and acting more like his normal self. It felt like things would be getting better. Then he told me in the car that he called his parents before arriving at the hotel and told them that the baby name hadn't been decided yet, and to stop bringing monogrammed items.

Naturally, when we got home, his parents were lurking outside and immediately came to our door.

We took that moment to tell them that our child would be named Arjun Bradley Smith. Hell broke out.

His mom started sobbing hysterically, accusing me of taking their family away, ruining their family traditions, etc. She rehashed a lot of old arguments, such as me not attending their family trips to Disney World or their trips to the lake (I've been before, but it's not my cup of tea, so I usually stay home). His father stayed quiet but glowered, occasionally putting in some passive-aggressive lines.

But we all really snapped when she said her baby boy should have never married a "dothead slut" like me, and that since the baby was going to be born brown "none of us will even know if it's Brad's!" I wanted to slap that stupid woman in the face.

I honestly thought my husband wasn't going to say anything, but he did. He yelled at his mother and said that if she couldn't treat his wife and child with respect, she wouldn't be part of their lives. His mother, teary-eyed and hysterical, said she wouldn't be part of a baby named Arjun's life anyway.

We showed them the door and haven't let them in our house since.

Now, a few days later, we're looking up places to move. We're deciding on whether we should stay in town or just move far far away. Either way we can't live down the street from his family anymore.

Every day I'm so thankful that my husband chose me over his parents. A few days ago I would've thought otherwise, but now I know he's here to stay. We plan to move somewhere, start couples therapy, and then eventually welcome our little baby boy.

What still concerns me is that our child will have no family around. It's not feasible for us to move where my parents are, but I plan to talk to them and see if they can visit a bit more often than once every couple of years. But there won't be any family gatherings or grandparents for Arjun to grow up with. My husband's siblings no longer live in his hometown, and seeing as they've been castigated by the parents before, might take our side. At least Arjun could have aunts and uncle.

If you all have any advice for us on raising a child with little to no family support, we would really appreciate it. Also, regarding starting over in a new city, where we won't know anyone. We're leaning towards moving out of state, since my job is pretty transferable and Brad works from home. Maybe somewhere more diverse for the sake of our mixed child?

tl;dr: My husband's parents are awful people and are no longer part of our lives. Arjun Bradley Smith (last name is still an alias, btw) is expected in mid-October. Looking for a new place to live and a chance to start over.

Barudak
May 7, 2007

I am swearing at the grandparents in such a way that the pattern of the swears themselves are code for more swears until, at the deepest level my words are Brahma holding 8 middlefingers up.

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OctaMurk
Jun 21, 2013

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

My husband (26m) and I (25F) cannot agree on names for our unborn son


Update 1


Update 2


Finale

quote:

But we all really snapped when she said her baby boy should have never married a "dothead slut" like me, and that since the baby was going to be born brown "none of us will even know if it's Brad's!" I wanted to slap that stupid woman in the face.

I honestly thought my husband wasn't going to say anything, but he did. He yelled at his mother and said that if she couldn't treat his wife and child with respect, she wouldn't be part of their lives. His mother, teary-eyed and hysterical, said she wouldn't be part of a baby named Arjun's life anyway.

Ended well imo, glad to see the husband decided to stand up and do the right thing

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