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aphid_licker
Jan 7, 2009


Soulex posted:

Wife fuckig hates that movie too. It’s funny cause the more racist/idiot people ask my wife “is that real?” Yeah, that’s their main export. Followed closely by marijuana (that one is actually kinda true).

Good joke though. I only saw the movie once because I can’t watch sex crime/rape stuff. I’m too sensitive. Like, I was shaking during that Irreversible scene. gently caress!

I know this Albanian kid (was born here but has family there and goes there on vacation several times a year) through work and I asked him about the Marijuana thing and immediately regretted it because it's kind of a dick thing to ask but he just loled and said yep.

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Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos
Green Beret Discovered SEALs’ Illicit Cash. Then He Was Killed.

shame on an IGA
Apr 8, 2005


Naming a kid Braxton is the real thread fodder here. That's some God-tier koolaid chugging.

shame on an IGA fucked around with this message at 03:15 on Nov 13, 2017

Stultus Maximus
Dec 21, 2009

USPOL May
I hope his middle name is Jumpwings.

Fat Twitter Man
Jan 24, 2007

by R. Guyovich

https://theintercept.com/2017/01/10/the-crimes-of-seal-team-6/

this poo poo has been going on with DEVGRU since Rumsfeld started assigning JSOC teams to embassies

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Fat Twitter Man posted:

https://theintercept.com/2017/01/10/the-crimes-of-seal-team-6/

this poo poo has been going on with DEVGRU since Rumsfeld started assigning JSOC teams to embassies

Wait, I've seen that in another thread today, and the context deserves to be crossposted here:

Ride The Gravitron posted:

I [22F] cheated on my BF [23M]. He may have done something horrible to the guy cheated with.

quote:

Before I get started, yes I was an idiot to cheat. I cheated with a mutual friend of me and my BF who we will call M. We drunkenly hooked up a few times and then stopped. I felt awful about it but decided to not tell my BF becaue of what he might do.

My BF is ex-military. He has PTSD from his time spent on tour. He is very tall, very heavily muscled and has alot of tattoos. Basicly the stereotypical "alpha male". He normally is very sweet but I have seen him get angry at people before and it can be scary. He doesn't yell and scream but he has a very almost cold kind of anger to him and it is extremely unnerving.

He ended up going through my phone and seeing some compromising texts. A couple days ago in the middle of the night, he woke me up, showed me the texts, and left our apartment. He didn't come back until late the next night. He still isn't speaking to me really, which i suppose is fair and expected.

This is where things get really hosed up. I got a call from a close mutual friend of me and M last night. Apparently M is in the hospital in serious condition. A group of men broke into his home and assaulted him, the same night my BF left the apartment. Both of his knees were smashed with hammers and he has a serious concussion. Worse, according to our mutual friend he was anally r***d by these men to the point where aparently part of his rectum is torn.

I don't know what to do. Could it be possible that my BF did this? I know he has a group of close friends he fought with that could be willing to do something like this. Honestly I have no idea what to do. He won't talk to me at all, let alone tell me where he went that night. What should I do?

tl;dr: I cheated on my BF. He may have gang-r***d the person i cheated with.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Wait, I've seen that in another thread today, and the context deserves to be crossposted here:

:randstare:

Internet Wizard
Aug 9, 2009

BANDAIDS DON'T FIX BULLET HOLES

A dude I️ was boot camp buddies with got a jail sentence a couple of years back for beating up a Jody with a group of marines.

not caring here
Feb 22, 2012

blazemastah 2 dry 4 u
If the military taught me anything it's that military dudes need very little excuse for a same sex gang rape.

Soulex
Apr 1, 2009


Cacati in mano e pigliati a schiaffi!

Internet Wizard posted:

A dude I️ was boot camp buddies with got a jail sentence a couple of years back for beating up a Jody with a group of marines.

Anyone else see weird loving symbols where ‘I was...’ is supposed to be? Like 2 equal signs stacked on each other.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Soulex posted:

Anyone else see weird loving symbols where ‘I was...’ is supposed to be? Like 2 equal signs stacked on each other.

you're on your own there brother

Absurd Alhazred
Mar 27, 2010

by Athanatos

Soulex posted:

Anyone else see weird loving symbols where ‘I was...’ is supposed to be? Like 2 equal signs stacked on each other.

Huh, seems like there's some weird character code there:
code:
️

Soulex
Apr 1, 2009


Cacati in mano e pigliati a schiaffi!

Absurd Alhazred posted:

Huh, seems like there's some weird character code there:
code:
️

Awful App?

boop the snoot
Jun 3, 2016

Soulex posted:

Anyone else see weird loving symbols where ‘I was...’ is supposed to be? Like 2 equal signs stacked on each other.

iPhone autocorrect bug. It’s not on your end. It’s on the end of whoever makes the offending post.

iOS 11.1.1 fixes it.

my kinda ape
Sep 15, 2008

Everything's gonna be A-OK
Oven Wrangler
Yeah Apple managed to release a bug that replaces the 10th most common word in the English language with a hosed up character code.

Professor Bling
Nov 12, 2008

by LITERALLY AN ADMIN

my kinda ape posted:

Yeah Apple managed to release a bug that replaces the 10th most common word in the English language with a hosed up character code.

so is this the new "no headphone jack" or

EBB
Feb 15, 2005

The Bad With Money thread found a guy on Reddit suggesting people join the military to financially reset their lives:

https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/7cwi2s/i_would_strongly_recommend_the_military_for/

boop the snoot
Jun 3, 2016

Viva Miriya posted:

This is me being super super honest here but this is how I've gotten it figured.

I want to do the job of the infantryman; I want to be a fighter. I wanna to protect the people of my country. I want to destroy the enemies of my country. I want to live an honorable life and I don't want to die having lived an easy, safe life, when I know I can do more.

That's as simple as it gets and this is despite talking to other vets around me, reading up on stuff, and reading up on you guys talk about your experiences. I'm drawn to this poo poo like a moth to the light.

not caring here
Feb 22, 2012

blazemastah 2 dry 4 u
Hahahahha, goddamn you wanna protect the people of this country go be a fire fighter or an OSHA inspector or lobby for healthcare.

PookBear
Nov 1, 2008

I LICK APE PUSSY posted:

The Bad With Money thread found a guy on Reddit suggesting people join the military to financially reset their lives:

https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/7cwi2s/i_would_strongly_recommend_the_military_for/

it worked for remedial

shame on an IGA
Apr 8, 2005

you buried the lede: ENLIST WITH A DEGREE, GO STRAIGHT TO E-4

boop the snoot
Jun 3, 2016

shame on an IGA posted:

you buried the lede: ENLIST WITH A DEGREE, GO STRAIGHT TO E-4

Not always. A guy I know got guaranteed e3. He wanted to go in as an officer but I guess officers have different recruiters? I don’t know how that poo poo works. So he walked into an enlisted recruiter and yeah. This was in 08 so I’m pretty sure the recruiter was just trying to fill slots.

This was before I joined so I didn’t know how stupid it was.

He ended up not joining because he said going in as an e3 with a degree was stupid.

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


I went in with a guy who played college ball and had a degree but his credit was hosed.
He's still an E last I saw so his plan to go officer hasn't played out yet.

He's got 10inch+ dick through so I guess his life aint all bad.

Dick Burglar
Mar 6, 2006

LingcodKilla posted:

He's got 10inch+ dick through so I guess his life aint all bad.

how do you know this

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


Dick Burglar posted:

how do you know this

Boot camp communal shower. Like star ship troopers but just a bunch of dicks.

Memento
Aug 25, 2009


Bleak Gremlin

Dick Burglar posted:

how do you know this

man if you haven't realised that basic is like a forest of cocks I don't know what to tell you

and there was always the one dude who was otherwise unremarkable who had to make sure he didn't smack himself in the kneecap with his monster dong

Aranan
May 21, 2007

Release the Kraken
Everything in the showers was just a flesh colored blob to me. Hooray for glasses, I guess?

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


I didn't look at the dicks.

We lost time with our families because someone pooped in the shower.

boop the snoot
Jun 3, 2016
We had a guy who didn’t wipe his rear end before getting in the shower. It was a regular thing that he just decided to tell us about one day.

I’m not a snitch but I sold him out so fuckin fast.

Naked Bear
Apr 15, 2007

Boners was recorded before a studio audience that was alive!
That was probably the only time I was glad to have terrible eyesight. One of the dudes in my basic platoon would come out of the shower and proceed to shave his nads by putting one foot up on the counter and going to town with his razor.

e: Oh, and dudes pissing on each other. :wtc:

Grem
Mar 29, 2004
Probation
Can't post for 27 days!

Naked Bear posted:

That was probably the only time I was glad to have terrible eyesight. One of the dudes in my basic platoon would come out of the shower and proceed to shave his nads by putting one foot up on the counter and going to town with his razor.

e: Oh, and dudes pissing on each other. :wtc:

Where else are you supposed to piss?

e: this avatar just keeps paying off

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


Memento posted:

man if you haven't realised that basic is like a forest of cocks I don't know what to tell you

and there was always the one dude who was otherwise unremarkable who had to make sure he didn't smack himself in the kneecap with his monster dong

Yeah we had a little Puerto Rican dude like that. Seriously I think he could trip himself walking without undies on.

Eugene V. Dubstep
Oct 4, 2013
Probation
Can't post for 8 years!

Naked Bear posted:

That was probably the only time I was glad to have terrible eyesight. One of the dudes in my basic platoon would come out of the shower and proceed to shave his nads by putting one foot up on the counter and going to town with his razor.

sweet jesus what the gently caress

Godholio
Aug 28, 2002

Does a bear split in the woods near Zheleznogorsk?

boop the snoot posted:

Not always. A guy I know got guaranteed e3. He wanted to go in as an officer but I guess officers have different recruiters? I don’t know how that poo poo works. So he walked into an enlisted recruiter and yeah. This was in 08 so I’m pretty sure the recruiter was just trying to fill slots.

:lol:

Yeah, that's how the Air Force does it. I met a guy who claimed that happened to him, and he didn't notice until he was getting formed up at Lackland AFB for basic. Apparently his "degree" was not from an accredited school (??!??) and he just signed whatever his recruiter handed him. Of course, I'm pretty sure his entire story was bullshit and he was even more mentally deficient than the story suggested.

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


at the date posted:

sweet jesus what the gently caress

As long as he cleans up. Heck we had boots sharing a contraband electric razor on their dicks.

Casimir Radon
Aug 2, 2008


Your pubes are not going to grow that much in two months that you need to do that. Jeez.

Crab Dad
Dec 28, 2002

behold i have tempered and refined thee, but not as silver; as CRAB


Casimir Radon posted:

Your pubes are not going to grow that much in two months that you need to do that. Jeez.

Our div didnt get the electric razor until our 2nd month from a div about to graduate. So nobody really knows how many cock and balls that poor machine shaved.

Gotta look good the ladies when you get out!

Woodchip
Mar 28, 2010

I LICK APE PUSSY posted:

The Bad With Money thread found a guy on Reddit suggesting people join the military to financially reset their lives:

https://www.reddit.com/r/personalfinance/comments/7cwi2s/i_would_strongly_recommend_the_military_for/

financial life will certainly be reset

LostCosmonaut
Feb 15, 2014

During basic at USAFA, a dude once kept an entire flight of people out of the showers by helicoptering his dick.

Dude was about 5 something, white, and over 9 inches flaccid. No idea what the gently caress

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Nice and hot piss
Feb 1, 2004

marine corps commercial voice: there are a few, that move towards the sound of the helicopter dick smacking pasty white thighs...

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