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Palpek posted:I (30M) am honestly not sure if my fiance (26) is mentally disabled, or has a learning disability. Can't talk to any of my friends about this, and I don't know if I should bring it up to her. I'm terrified she might just be unintelligent and that if I bring it up she will think I'm calling her dumb. This honestly sounds like me and my girlfriend, except I’m not all weird about it, I realize the difference between knowledge and intelligence, and also I know she actually does have sort of a learning disability, ADHD. Mostly you’d never think she’s dumb or anything, but every now and then she’ll just say something so wrong I’m nonplussed. My personal favorites included the assumption that A Clockwork Orange was steampunk, and the belief that Coca Cola and Pepsi Cola were the same company because both are called Cola.
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Dec 14, 2017 11:08
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https://www.reddit.com/r/offmychest/ is pretty good. Oh look, another one of those "super smart ones". The TLDR is good: I love my partner, but he can be a really clueless dum dum quote:My partner and I are both 28. We’ve been friends since we were 11, and started dating when we were 15. We’re not married, but pretty much live as a married couple.
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Dec 14, 2017 11:21
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Akratic Method posted:This honestly sounds like me and my girlfriend, except I’m not all weird about it, I realize the difference between knowledge and intelligence, and also I know she actually does have sort of a learning disability, ADHD. Mostly you’d never think she’s dumb or anything, but every now and then she’ll just say something so wrong I’m nonplussed. Based on what you're saying here I think maybe she's the smart one and you're the dumb one
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Dec 14, 2017 11:41
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/r/relationships: At risk for choking on a Cheeto, dying alone under the soft glow of the TV
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Dec 14, 2017 11:46
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choking to death on a cheeto seems hard, those things just start disintegrating the second they come in contact with moisture
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Dec 14, 2017 11:49
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Brother Entropy posted:choking to death on a cheeto seems hard, those things just start disintegrating the second they come in contact with moisture check your hydrated privelege! It's insensitive to us dessicated husks of a human beings.
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Dec 14, 2017 13:43
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Akratic Method posted:This honestly sounds like me and my girlfriend, except I’m not all weird about it, I realize the difference between knowledge and intelligence, and also I know she actually does have sort of a learning disability, ADHD. Mostly you’d never think she’s dumb or anything, but every now and then she’ll just say something so wrong I’m nonplussed. No matter who you're in a relationship with they're going to be deficient in some area. Even if you're in a relationship with an identical copy of yourself. I don't get how that guy associates intelligence with "facts about the world", although the flat earth thing would be instant dump territory for me if after a few minute explanation they didn't jump ship on that idea. Khorne fucked around with this message at 14:41 on Dec 14, 2017 |
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Dec 14, 2017 14:38
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Khorne posted:Even if you're in a relationship with an identical copy of yourself. No kidding, that guy is a real fucker.
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Dec 14, 2017 14:41
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Khorne posted:I don't get how that guy associates intelligence with "facts about the world", although the flat earth thing would be instant dump territory for me.
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Dec 14, 2017 14:43
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There is such a thing as non book-smart people who are smart in other areas, and calling her retarded is wrong, but if I was dating someone who pointed to Georgia on a map when I asked about New York it would be an insta-dump.  It's not so much the overall lack of knowledge in a given subject as it is the glaring incompatibility on display. I love learning even as an adult. To be THAT out of touch with basic stuff shows a stunning lack of intellectual curiosity.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:10
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The American education system is kind of a disaster, but it becomes alarming when people don't know basic things because you don't know the depths of their ignorance, and will likely endanger their lives, yours or that of important things due to their idiocy.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:11
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new phone who dis posted:It ain't gotta be bald but it does need some management.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:16
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cowofwar posted:Dear reddit, I think my fiancee might be a man but I'm not sure. Modified wooden toilet roll holder.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:17
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Porn has set very unreasonable expectations for sex and body maintenance.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:18
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I'd get if the guy wanted to dump her because she's frustrating to be with if general knowledge is important to him. I mean, dealing with a flat-earther partner must be nuts. But he's asking the internet if she's retarded and how can he ask her about being really dumb - he's a loving idiot.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:20
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FactsAreUseless posted:Women don't have to do poo poo about their bodies for you, suck it. And based on historical r/relationships submissions, men don't have to wipe their asses at all either, but there has to be an element of give and take.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:21
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You mean like, she does exactly what he wants 11 months of the year, and does what she wants 1 month of the year?
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Dec 14, 2017 15:23
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i like nice words
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Palpek posted:I'd get if the guy wanted to dump her because she's frustrating to be with if general knowledge is important to him. I mean, dealing with a flat-earther partner must be nuts. But he's asking the internet if she's retarded and how can he ask her about being really dumb - he's a loving idiot. He's managed to date her for months without this being deal breaking, so she's clearly not a drooling idiot. He says he she can speak quite normally about topics she finds interest in, I think he's just being overly concerned. If she fails to learn these things after being told what they are, though, I would be concerned at that point. As long as she's willing and able to learn, ignorance itself isn't that terrible a flaw. Also, she's not a "flat earther" like she's not hardcore about it she just went "well, what if, huh?" in a generic dumb kinda way.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:25
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Palpek posted:https://www.reddit.com/r/offmychest/ is pretty good. Edit:oh not relationships Nevermind.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:29
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Theophany posted:And based on historical r/relationships submissions, men don't have to wipe their asses at all either, but there has to be an element of give and take.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:35
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WampaLord posted:He's managed to date her for months without this being deal breaking, so she's clearly not a drooling idiot. He says he she can speak quite normally about topics she finds interest in, I think he's just being overly concerned. You can date someone for months and talk about nothing but harmless casual stuff without veering into discussion that necessitates scientific/geographical knowledge. Also think about how  someone has to be to even entertain flat earth. Like that and the Georgia fuckup are both things you should have learned in second grade.Now if she was homeschooled or stuck in one of those crazy hardcore Christian cult curriculums that make you learn nothing but horseshit that's a different story altogether.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:38
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If you don't respect your partner (or you don't feel respected by them) you should break up, that's one of the rules. One of my grandmother's farmhands is one of the smartest people I know, when he gets talking about his work, nature or life in general he clearly has authoritive knowledge and exceptional problem-solving skills, he certainly has his poo poo together waaay better than me. But he also never had formal education and was barely taught how to read, so he's very ignorant about a lot of things outside the scope of his life.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:46
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The “I think my girlfriend is disabled” guy sounds like an asswipe, but his girlfriend does sound completely unaware of the world in a way that would drive me bananas and make me wonder the same thing. Living in Long Island and not being able to find New York on a map, not knowing what hand sanitizer is, and calling the Iraq War the Iran War are all things that are waaaaaay beyond “has a shallow/specific knowledge base”. Like has she not gone to a doctor’s office or walked by a TV playing the news since 2001? FactsAreUseless posted:Women don't have to do poo poo about their bodies for you, suck it.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:53
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Bamabalacha posted:I think men and women should both have neatly trimmed body hair. Wild thatches of hair poking out are gross on everyone. A preference on your part does not constitute an obligation on theirs.
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Dec 14, 2017 15:57
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It was the guy's right to not have sex with her if he found the body hair THAT unappealing, but him doing the no D thing in response is him clearly being a petulant baby and worse, carries possible disturbing undertones of control and punishment. She should be thankful for the easy sign that he is human garbage and go get all the D she can handle in December from better men. Also you'd be surprised how many guys flat out refuse to shave their junk yet expect you to have porn star levels of body hair management. 
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Dec 14, 2017 15:59
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FactsAreUseless posted:Women don't have to do poo poo about their bodies for you, suck it. No, they don't, but someone is still allowed to express a preference, and then decide how much of a deal breaker it is when there's deviation. Personally? As long as they're hygienic, dgaf.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:00
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Bamabalacha posted:I think men and women should both have neatly trimmed body hair. Wild thatches of hair poking out are gross on everyone.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:04
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extra row of teeth posted:It was the guy's right to not have sex with her if he found the body hair THAT unappealing, but him doing the no D thing in response is him clearly being a petulant baby and worse, carries possible disturbing undertones of control and punishment. She should be thankful for the easy sign that he is human garbage and go get all the D she can handle in December from better men. Yeah, he'd have a leg to stand on if it was just refusing sex while she wasn't shaving (because you aren't obligated to gently caress, either), but to continue withholding sex after she's resumed doing exactly what he asked her to do is being vindictive and petty. She wasn't doing No-Shave November just to spite him. He's doing this bullshit in December out of spite alone.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:04
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Nothing will start a slapfight in GBS faster than mentioning pussy hair.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:06
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Anne Whateley posted:Remember the whole thing was only a month, you're not gonna get to "wild thatches" level in a month. Pubic hair grows less than half an inch per month. Oh I know, guy is being a tremendous weenie, I was just speaking more about body hair in general. If you’re gonna wear a tank top in the summer, stubble is the absolute most you should have because sweaty armpit hair flopping out is gross as hell, regardless of gender. And I will die on that hill.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:08
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Clark Nova posted:Nothing will start a slapfight in GBS faster than mentioning pussy hair. circumcision
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Dec 14, 2017 16:09
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extra row of teeth posted:She should be thankful for the easy sign that he is human garbage and go get all the D she can handle in December from better men. "No vJ January for you." "I'm starting a No D December as well. We're not together anymore Dickhead." I don't know, something.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:12
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I'm 100% certain that if the genders were reversed in that story, this thread would still be siding with the woman.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:14
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Palpek posted:I just want her to break up with him with a pun. I feel like it should incorporate 'VaJanuary.'
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Dec 14, 2017 16:15
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I personally like body hair, but hot take: While you are not utterly beholden to the desires of anyone relative to your body, male or female, your romantic partner should obviously have some say in that. If your boyfriend really doesn't like body hair to the point he won't have sex, maybe shave it or dump him. The guy is obviously being trash for taunting her with the lack of availability of that good dick, but like, if he'd just straight dumped her after she refused to shave I don't think I'd fault him. She doesn't have to shave for him, though he equally doesn't have to go out with her.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:15
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blarzgh posted:I'm 100% certain that if the genders were reversed in that story, this thread would still be siding with the woman.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:21
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Nobody owes anybody sex ever, unless you are a medieval Knight who has just saved a royal from a dragon to win their hand in marriage In all other situations, you are not owed sex, but should probably break up if you aren't having it
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Dec 14, 2017 16:23
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Look he can't just do a self-help dumping. For an issue like body hair, he needs to give her a 30 day shave or quit notice, and then if the condition isn't cured he can follow up with an r/relatioships sever proceeding, after which time he can have the sherif remove her from the bedroom. Turning off the D after she cures the breach is cured isn't allowed.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:26
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Anne Whateley posted:Remember the whole thing was only a month, you're not gonna get to "wild thatches" level in a month. Pubic hair grows less than half an inch per month. Speak for yourself
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Dec 14, 2017 16:28
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Blade Runner posted:Nobody owes anybody sex ever, unless you are a medieval Knight who has just saved a royal from a dragon to win their hand in marriage Listen, I save a lot of menfolk in misery and Im gonna tell you it would be unbelievably unproffessional to gently caress the priority target after I kill the mythical beast guarding them.
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Dec 14, 2017 16:31
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