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Mr Fronts
Jan 31, 2016

Yo! The Mafia supports you. But don't tell no one. Spread the word.

alf_pogs posted:

star citizen: i have no head and i must chat

This is simply too perfect.

e: tax





Mr Fronts fucked around with this message at 13:05 on Dec 26, 2017

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his nibs
Feb 27, 2016

:kayak:Welcome to the:kayak:
Dream Factory
:kayak:
Grimey Drawer
Star Citizen: The Headless Parpman of the Apocalypse

FailureToReport
Nov 25, 2017

Warlord in training

his nibs posted:

Star Citizen: The Headless Parpman of the Apocalypse


CryTek was given the heads in a settlement.

Daztek
Jun 2, 2006



In CA, weekends and holidays count for the 21 day summons, so CIG has to respond by 3-4 January :ohdear:

Tank Boy Ken
Aug 24, 2012
J4G for life
Fallen Rib

Daztek posted:

In CA, weekends and holidays count for the 21 day summons, so CIG has to respond by 3-4 January :ohdear:

This will be an awesome new year!

Mr Fronts
Jan 31, 2016

Yo! The Mafia supports you. But don't tell no one. Spread the word.

Daztek posted:

In CA, weekends and holidays count for the 21 day summons, so CIG has to respond by 3-4 January :ohdear:

CR: I would like to point out that ever since I got the legal threat from Skadden I have been working on this response. I worked on this until 5am last night, and a couple more hours this morning in the UK, where I am currently am in preparation for ATV in a week from Saturday. Conservatively it’s taken me about eight hours to write. This is time I could have spent working on the game instead of dealing with a Crytek instigated drama. And this is really what annoys me – that their silly lawsuits occasionally gain traction and pull me away from the very thing I prefer to do and the very thing everyone wants me to do and the very thing Crytek accuses me of not doing – CHANGING THE ENGINE/NOT CHANGING THE ENGINE (-note -check with Ortwin which one I should go with)! By constantly nagging, writing warning letters and soliciting solicitors in the background to enforce a dumb old licensing agreement, Crytek is waging guerrilla warfare on my time, the time of other key executives, and the peace of mind of our employees and backers.

Mr Fronts fucked around with this message at 15:01 on Dec 26, 2017

SelenicMartian
Sep 14, 2013

Sometimes it's not the bomb that's retarded.

Daztek posted:

In CA, weekends and holidays count for the 21 day summons, so CIG has to respond by 3-4 January :ohdear:
Well, too bad CIG is off until mid-January so the court will have to wait.

stingtwo
Nov 16, 2012

Daztek posted:

In CA, weekends and holidays count for the 21 day summons, so CIG has to respond by 3-4 January :ohdear:

oh please god i hope their response is made public

Kavak
Aug 23, 2009


I really hope they loving forget or run like hell.

FailureToReport
Nov 25, 2017

Warlord in training

Kavak posted:

I really hope they loving forget or run like hell.

I'll take either, but it would be loving gold if they defaulted because they "were on holiday break".

Ursine Catastrophe
Nov 9, 2009

It's a lovely morning in the void and you are a horrible lady-in-waiting.



don't ask how i know

Dinosaur Gum
They're stupid about a lot of things but I really can't picture them being stupid enough to forget this is hanging over their head.

Now, I could see Ortwin "Wrote a 30 year old book in Germany about IP law" Freyermuth trying to do it on his own and not catching the california "weekends and holidays count" thing, but I wouldn't expect it.

Daztek
Jun 2, 2006



Maybe the thread intern or MoMA will see this and they can inform Ortwin

kw0134
Apr 19, 2003

I buy feet pics🍆

Pleadings, rulings, motions, etc., are public information and will be available to people with PACER accounts a day after it's filed with the court. The response to the complaint can be more or less a single page with Ortwin scribbling in crayon "lol no" to all the allegations and that ought to suffice for the purposes of entering a response and avoiding a default. Of course the proper way to do this is to lay an appropriate foundation for your defense, and there are certain things you must plead at this time or it's waived (jurisdictional flaws, e.g.) but CIG can clownshow the case for a little while longer with the bare minimum needed.

Given that low, low barrier I don't expect a default but...it's CIG. Who the gently caress knows. Maybe this will explode in a supernova of stupidity before it finally fades away, the bright star in the sunk cost galaxy that shines all too briefly before being devoured by the Skadden supermassive black hole.

El Grillo
Jan 3, 2008
Fun Shoe

Bootcha posted:

Oh poo poo you forgot to check your stocking...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9hPxnBAdbbo
Beautiful. Though the bits with the little models and the pictures of Sandi and Chris kind of remind me of the Mr Plinket serial killer stuff just FYI lol

Sarsapariller posted:

Wonderful. Glad to see the "Bugs of Star Citizen" clips live on. There's been so much documented absurdity throughout the lifetime of this project, I really want to watch just an hour of the best jank and glitches.
Bugs of Star Citizen still makes me crack up. Tops the long list of great goon creations to come out of the SC shitfest. Close second being Goon-De-Yadda.

CeeJee
Dec 4, 2001
Oven Wrangler

Tank Boy Ken posted:

This will be an awesome new year!

This is how I imagine things to end: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoDh61sgCOg&t=1159s

The whole documentary is 33 years old and yet it's all strangely familiar.

Beer4TheBeerGod
Aug 23, 2004
Exciting Lemon

CeeJee posted:

This is how I imagine things to end: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZoDh61sgCOg&t=1159s

The whole documentary is 33 years old and yet it's all strangely familiar.

Protip to CIG employees; don't leave any personal effects on site. Assume this could happen at any moment, because it could.

Maybe swing by the office when nobody is there and grab your stuff right now. You know, while you still have access.

Mr Fronts
Jan 31, 2016

Yo! The Mafia supports you. But don't tell no one. Spread the word.

kw0134 posted:

Pleadings, rulings, motions, etc., are public information and will be available to people with PACER accounts a day after it's filed with the court. The response to the complaint can be more or less a single page with Ortwin scribbling in crayon "lol no" to all the allegations and that ought to suffice for the purposes of entering a response and avoiding a default. Of course the proper way to do this is to lay an appropriate foundation for your defense, and there are certain things you must plead at this time or it's waived (jurisdictional flaws, e.g.) but CIG can clownshow the case for a little while longer with the bare minimum needed.

Given that low, low barrier I don't expect a default but...it's CIG. Who the gently caress knows. Maybe this will explode in a supernova of stupidity before it finally fades away, the bright star in the sunk cost galaxy that shines all too briefly before being devoured by the Skadden supermassive black hole.

Star Citizen: A Supernova of Stupidity

NVB
Jan 23, 2010

Grimey Drawer

Need this added to my Rap Sheet Prease.

Rad Russian
Aug 15, 2007

Soviet Power Supreme!

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Protip to CIG employees; don't leave any personal effects on site. Assume this could happen at any moment, because it could.

Maybe swing by the office when nobody is there and grab your stuff right now. You know, while you still have access.

Nonsense. Tonk sales alone will easily get them through to Gamescom 2018 where 3.1 pre-alpha will be showcased.

Cao Ni Ma
May 25, 2010



drat I forgot BBG is dead, did anyone remind you losers to call your parents?

Cao Ni Ma
May 25, 2010



Cao Ni Ma posted:

drat I forgot BBG is dead, did anyone remind you losers to call your parents?

I will have you know good sir that I already called my parents.

Veni Vidi Ameche!
Nov 2, 2017

by Fluffdaddy

Ha. You (or someone) went deep for that one.

It seems like we're in a lull, now. When is the next hilarious/tragically incompetent thing we can expect to see come from CIG? Do they survive 2018?

snoremac
Jul 27, 2012

I LOVE SEEING DEAD BABIES ON 𝕏, THE EVERYTHING APP. IT'S WORTH IT FOR THE FOLLOWING TAB.
I was hungover and played CoD Infinite Warfare’s campaign. It’s way cooler than anything I’ve seen from Star Citizen, a solid 7/10.

One in the Bum
Apr 25, 2014

Hair Elf

Mr Fronts posted:

CR: I would like to point out that ever since I got the legal threat from Skadden I have been working on this response. I worked on this until 5am last night, and a couple more hours this morning in the UK, where I am currently am in preparation for ATV in a week from Saturday. Conservatively it’s taken me about eight hours to write. This is time I could have spent working on the game instead of dealing with a Crytek instigated drama. And this is really what annoys me – that their silly lawsuits occasionally gain traction and pull me away from the very thing I prefer to do and the very thing everyone wants me to do and the very thing Crytek accuses me of not doing – CHANGING THE ENGINE/NOT CHANGING THE ENGINE (-note -check with Ortwin which one I should go with)! By constantly nagging, writing warning letters and soliciting solicitors in the background to enforce a dumb old licensing agreement, Crytek is waging guerrilla warfare on my time, the time of other key executives, and the peace of mind of our employees and backers.

Chris would write his own response to a major lawsuit rather than hire outside counsel. So this checks out.

Xaerael
Aug 25, 2010

Marching Powder is objectively the worst poster known. He also needs to learn how a keyboard works.

Veni Vidi Ameche! posted:

Ha. You (or someone) went deep for that one.

It seems like we're in a lull, now. When is the next hilarious/tragically incompetent thing we can expect to see come from CIG? Do they survive 2018?

My predictions:~

Survive 2018!

However, staffing and studio cutbacks start. 1 studio closes, and other studios lose staff (narrative: "their job is done! good luck in their futures! SC beta release right around the corner!")

Crytek court hearing is stalled till late in the year, eventually found in Crytek's favour. Crytek get a large settlement that shocks everyone. (narrative: "it's fine! Chris said they only needed a fraction of what they've taken, and that big bite doesn't even take us close to that total after the deduction!")

"3.1" doesn't see release. "3.1" being a proxy version number denoting significant advances in things to do that actually impact the game experience.

More big budget MoCap is done. (narrative: "woah! this is final polish stuff! Sq42 must be on the release cards any day soon!")

NOTHING live is shown at any events. 100% pre-recorded "safe" footage is shown. Game mechanics are demonstrated in those recordings which never come to pass in the time frame of 2018.

Chris is seen less and less.

Sandi "cuts back" on her time onscreen.

Ben ends up hospitalised again.

Year end: "weird" things start happening, refunds from August are still outstanding. April 2019, CIG shutters.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard


CrazyLoon
Aug 10, 2015

"..."

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Protip to CIG employees; don't leave any personal effects on site. Assume this could happen at any moment, because it could.

Maybe swing by the office when nobody is there and grab your stuff right now. You know, while you still have access.

And if not, well then don't worry. I'm sure Crobblers will spin it all akin to how Activision called the cops on Infinity Ward's offices or something and transform it into you as the plucky underdogs while he and the rest of the execs run off with what money they can to the Caymans or whatever.

chochmah
Sep 27, 2015
Citizens being a bit tender even about pretty mellow reviews of their game, privacy claims, claims of terrorism, etc.:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jT2mEO0JtOo&t=240s


The original, 16 months old video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IHUbzzKJXBc

chochmah fucked around with this message at 17:36 on Dec 26, 2017

CapMoron
Nov 20, 2000
Forum Veteran

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Protip to CIG employees; don't leave any personal effects on site. Assume this could happen at any moment, because it could.

Maybe swing by the office when nobody is there and grab your stuff right now. You know, while you still have access.

They basically live there, so there is always someone there. I think it's leaving to go home with your stuff that is the problem with infinite crunch time.

Colostomy Bag
Jan 11, 2016

:lesnick: C-Bangin' it :lesnick:

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Protip to CIG employees; don't leave any personal effects on site. Assume this could happen at any moment, because it could.

Maybe swing by the office when nobody is there and grab your stuff right now. You know, while you still have access.

Are you implying someone should take the garage door opener?

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard


Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:

The Titanic posted:

I have to believe that somewhere in CIG high command, somebody has come to the realization that the mmo is never going to happen without an enormous, very lengthy total rewrite.

What they built so far may be good for Sq42 drop-in/drop-out coop with like 4 friends, but that’s about it.

I think, because I have to think, is that this keeps getting reported to Roberts, but he either ignores it, or demands people soldier through the problem because he came up with the solution already (mesh tech) and they just need to apply the code to it.

I believe that CR sees “mmo rewrite: 6 years to alpha” and he can’t wrap his mind around another 6+ years just to get a very basic functional vertical slice of his dream mmo out the door. He sees the arena game, and sees how it works, but that it just needs more tweaking with his great ideas to make it a 10,000+ player mmo with his magical ideas.

He has to be aware of what he’s facing, but he can’t go out and sell more ships to people with no game they can play.

I want to believe about a year ago when they began the Lumberyard switch and Derek reported the SC mains were on maintenance mode, they were about to begin this project.

But then CR stormed in after watching Dune and shouted “desert level sandworm is what I must show!!!” And everybody threw their keyboards into a wall and began working on that. As time went on, SC came out of maintenance mode, and absolutely no work was done on the actual mmo part they were going to try to build.

Now they are basically where they were 1.5 years ago with an engine that still can’t work, except now the added in hack jobs are really starting to add up. The system literally can be extended no further, and even the best computers can no longer play it.

Lack of planning, lack of comprehension, and hubris are going to force more people away this year since the only thing they can do to make this mess work is rebuild it as an actual mmo, which will take a decade or so, or remove components to help get it sort of functional again. They may be able to figure out how to band aid stuff, but they’re looking at teeny tiny gains out of that.

In my other post where I was calling it I pointed out how CIG themselves have said that every ship is a special case snowflake. Maybe 6 months ago AtV addressed this saying they were going to unify how ladders animations are called.

Well I got to thinking, how far does this problem go back? We know CryEngine doesn't have the best default vehicles to work with. I haven't played all the Crysis games but I don't remember much beyond a jeep and that has almost no interaction and the animation to get in and out. For whatever reason that I still don't get and never will, Chris and most backers are hyper fixated on ships. So what was the first build they ever put out? The "Hangar Module" where you can stare at your stationary ship and maybe climb inside a little. Who knows what they created in order to get that out quickly? It seems apparent to me that they didn't create a modular system that let them treat all ship elements in a similar manner and it appears not much thought was put into how they would communicate that ship object over the network. Let's keep in mind the hangar module was a singleplayer experience for a long time so they probably didn't care at that time because Chris wants players to see their space chariots in glorious 3D right now!

Just more cart before the horse mistakes thanks to the desire to bring in more hype and money.

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Pixelemonade is back baby! I knew they’d never let me down! Another hard hitting totally honest and not bought story from a genuine definitely not paid for marketing website!

Thank heavens for honesty in the industry the likes which big names like pixelemonade can finally bring!

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

Sarsapariller posted:

Pixel Lemonade is offline now. I guess they only paid for one year's worth of hosting on their fake site for the single positive article.

Drink up that pixel lemonade, backers. Drink it all up.

And gently caress. drat it pixelemonade. drat it.

Oh well, Twitter is free so go spread game journalism!!!

Virtual Captain
Feb 20, 2017

Archive Priest of the Stimperial Order

Star Citizen Good, in all things forevermore. Amen.
:pray:

Mirificus posted:

reddit posted:

Unlike Chris, I actually write code for a living, and for many years applied that in the gaming industry. I have multiple AAA titles under my belt. You won’t believe any of that, same as you won’t believe that Star Citizen has already technologically failed. But I don’t care about your beliefs beyond marveling at their lunacy. All the evidence you need is right in front of you. Go play Star Citizen! It’s always been utter unplayable poo poo and it always will be.

I would never share my whole CV for obvious reasons, but I’ve shared this one on the old RSI forums: Starsiege Tribes.
The point is, at a technical level, Star Citizen’s engine is in disastrous shape when compared with what they’re promising, and from my perspective, it’s getting worse. I want to see Star Citizen made, so I’m gonna keep speaking my mind, and defending myself when the white knights ride up on their horses and hurl their weak rear end insults from inside their echo chamber.

AHAHAHAHAHAHA

The Titanic
Sep 15, 2016

Unsinkable

CrazyLoon posted:

All my dignity.

:lol:

*serious*

It’s not enough. Better dig deep here. Don’t stop when it’s so close.

Scruffpuff
Dec 23, 2015

Fidelity. Wait, was I'm working on again?

The Titanic posted:

I’m not sure if you’re agreeing, disagreeing, or simply adding to what I said. :)

Agreeing and adding. I used too many words to describe something simple because what Chris is doing is so scummy it pisses me off.

Shorter version: Star Citizen is complete poo poo, it runs like poo poo because it's badly coded, and Chris is lying and suggesting that it needs powerful hardware to get the most out of it in a bid to cover his own staggering incompetence.

Where this is really harmful is that the backers are so stupid they're going out and doing it. Who knows how much money was set on fire because of CR's lies about the performance of his "game." It's like he's committing fraud in multiple fields at once.

grimcreaper
Jan 7, 2012


Thats a pretty neat kayelf. We need more good dog pics. And cats. And otters. And raccoons.

Mirificus
Oct 29, 2004

Kings need not raise their voices to be heard


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hardycore
Nov 4, 2009

dreams. dreams happen now

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