Star Citizen: Death of a Space Thread?

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Xaerael: Aug 25, 2010; Marching Powder is objectively the worst poster known. He also needs to learn how a keyboard works.

SomethingJones posted:

Wait, this is real?

Is this real?

Yes. It's real. Aside from the obvious edit. Chris Roberts has the handwriting of a 6 year old nosepicker.

Xaerael fucked around with this message at 02:27 on Jan 21, 2018

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:23

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 18:24

Galarox: Sep 23, 2015; Fun Shoe

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Did I miss anything in the last 400 pages or so?

Would you like to know more?

edit: Xaerael: Catte taxXe!

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:25

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Galarox posted:

This one was fun to do:

Superb

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:26

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

big nipples big life posted:

The list is actually:

Wrong Company
Yeah that's the Wrong Company
Can't give you a refund, Wrong Company
You're suing the Wrong Company
Robert Space doesn't work here, you must have the Wrong Company
Making a Game? Nope, Wrong Company

Well, not matter which company you pick...you're gunna be in bad company

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:27

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

boviscopophobic posted:

"Price one shilling"

God drat I missed that, even better

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:29

Thoatse: Feb 29, 2016; Lol said the scorpion, lmao

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Did I miss anything in the last 400 pages or so?

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:30

Quavers: Feb 26, 2016; You clearly don't understand game development

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/220671107?t=19m55s

Bowtie is angry about CIG shipping costs

e:

Bottom-right fanboy called FastCart suggests that since Amazon has "Amazon Prime" subs giving fast cheap shipping, CIG should have "CIG Prime" :lol:

Quavers fucked around with this message at 02:36 on Jan 21, 2018

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:32

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Quavers posted:

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/220671107?t=19m55s

Bowtie is angry about CIG shipping costs

So close. So close to be angry about the right thing. Bowtie...just remove the ping and the scales will fall from your eyes.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:36

Thoatse: Feb 29, 2016; Lol said the scorpion, lmao

...and

[img]https://i.imgur.com/BqmTnzK.jpg[[/img]

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:36

XK: Jul 9, 2001; Star Citizen is everywhere. It is all around us. Even now, in this very room. You can see it's fidelity when you look out your window or when you watch youtube

SomethingJones posted:

Wait, this is real?

Is this real?

These realizations are endlessly amusing.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 02:55

Raskolnikov: Nov 25, 2003

The raw talent that comes out of this thread sometimes. God bless.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:00

SpaceCurtisLeMay: Sep 30, 2016; We're at war with Goons. We were attacked by Goons. Do you want to kill Goons, or would you rather have Citizens killed?

XK posted:

The only person who's disagreed with this is Dr. Smart. Take it up with him.

Depends on who you ask in the legal profession. If you talk to people who work at firms, in-house counsel aren't "actively practicing" as in-house counsel rarely if ever actually go to court. If you have a legal battle that requires time in the courtroom you hire outside counsel. If you talk to in-house counsel, like my wife, they absolutely consider themselves practicing lawyers as they have to maintain an active bar license, CLE's, etc..

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:04

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

"I'm a practicing musician," I say as I slide the cotton swab deep into my ear and waggle, "I practice all the time."

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:08

Ashye: Jul 29, 2013

So many

for all those images that make me laugh when I'm supposed to be doing productive poo poo.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:11

Quavers: Feb 26, 2016; You clearly don't understand game development

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/220671107?t=58m29s

Top right dude doesn't like the $350 special CIG dinner event things, that are only available to $1k+ backers. Bowtie flips his nut

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:14

Scruffpuff: Dec 23, 2015; Fidelity. Wait, was I'm working on again?

AP posted:

I think French has made a great contribution to the Star Citizen story because he hyped Citizens so much for the motion to dismiss and now he's backtracking so fast it's hilarious.

I like to believe, because hope springs eternal, that for one brief moment this one man, this one man among citizens, realized it is not necessary to burn himself in effigy, but in fact reclaimed his autonomy and said to himself, "wait, I have my own life to live, who gives a gently caress about some scam-artist has-been?" But as belief without evidence is tenuous, so belief in the face of mountains of completely contradictory evidence is the Path of the Citizen, and so I must realize his backtracking must have some other cause. That a man would sacrifice his reputation and livelihood on Chris Roberts' Scam Altar is simply too common and too much the New Normal to disbelieve any more.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:18

Quavers: Feb 26, 2016; You clearly don't understand game development

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/220671107?t=01h01m29s
Paul "TheAstroPub" show-host describes the /r/StarCitizen community :gary:

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:22

Thoatse: Feb 29, 2016; Lol said the scorpion, lmao

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:26

SPERMCUBE.ORG: Nov 3, 2011; Space commies are th' biggest threat t' red-blooded American Freedom we got in th' future. So me and my boys got to talking over a few hot dogs the other day and this is what we came up with...

Thoatse posted:

It wan't just mine and I wasn't being hyperbolic when I said my machine can run Start Citizen but not that gif for whatever reason. I get decent framerates in most VR apps, but my computer went into anaphylactic shock from whatever it was in that gif and how it reacted with other background systems. Or something.

Restarting my machine was all I could do to get it back to normal, but clicking on the the tab with that gif in it again would choke it until it was restarted each time, even if I closed the tab... gpu at 98% (r9 290)

Better call Dennis.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:28

Colostomy Bag: Jan 11, 2016; C-Bangin' it

Beer4TheBeerGod posted:

Did I miss anything in the last 400 pages or so?

Proper moderation.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:32

G0RF: Mar 19, 2015; Some galactic defender you are, Space Cadet.

Quavers posted:

https://www.twitch.tv/videos/220671107?t=58m29s

Top right dude doesn't like the $350 special CIG dinner event things, that are only available to $1k+ backers. Bowtie flips his nut

That had to feel good, Erris. Don�t worry though man, I�m sure if the cash need grow dire enough, Chris will do a 30 City around the world tour and give Canadians a chance to be experience Concierge-level panhandling from the Master bigger himself.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:35

Baldness: Dec 1, 2017

kw0134 posted:

Man, the backers are really going to get their minds blown when the rantings of an internet lawyer prove to be largely false and the Feb 9th hearing ends in 5 minutes with a flat denial to the MtD and an order to get this shitshow really rolling with schedules for discovery and trial, etc. I wonder what idiocy we'll hear then. "This going straight to the Supreme Court!" "Judge is <vile racist slur>!" "The judiciary is rigged!"

Do you realise how long it takes to develop a AAA law case ?

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:35

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Baldness posted:

Do you realise how long it takes to develop a AAA law case ?

"Do you realise," I start to say as I rear up to my full height of twenty feet tall and seven litigations wide, "how long it takes," I continue as my presence dominates the room like Gandalf roasting Bilbo, "to develop..." I say and my mouth unhinges, "a AAA law case?" I finally scream as fire erupts from my maw and all is turned to cinders

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:42

starkebn: May 18, 2004; "Oooh, got a little too serious. You okay there, little buddy?"

serious norman posted:

is the game out yet?

We're playing it right now

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:42

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

Is the game out yet? It's out of fukkin control mate!

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:44

Baldness: Dec 1, 2017

happyhippy posted:

Where's my gluten free vegan space sausages?

You may want to inspect Sandi Gardners colon for those.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:49

Pixelate: Jan 6, 2018; "You win by having fun"

Game proceeding as expected.

---

EXPECTED RESULT:
Corpse should lie on ground like corpses normally do

---

EXPECTED RESULT:
Not to start off with random bleed out when waking from bed.

---

EXPECTED RESULT:
To simply place the box on the cargo floor

---

EXPECTED RESULT:
Reached my destination without my PC rebooting.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 03:55

WarpDogs: May 1, 2009; I'm just a normal, functioning member of the human race, and there's no way anyone can prove otherwise.

Hey so I feel legitimately dumb for having to ask this, but what's the big deal behind the latest court response? Everyone is acting like Derek called something, but I can't tell what

It just looks like more posturing, which would be expected. Doesn't seem the needle has really moved one way or the other, or that we're any closer to the ELE

Is there something more substantial that I'm just seeing?

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:03

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

Jobbo_Fett posted:

Hello,

My name is Frank and *long sigh* I am a Caller. I've been a Caller for a number of years and I am ashamed that it has consumed so much of myself. At first I was just calling simple stuff, like when the pizza guy would show up or when my toast was ready. After the addiction started to set in, I knew I had a problem, but I couldn't fight it.

For a time, I suspected my family knew, so I tried to make it a part of my personality. I tried Calling my kids grades, or their high school crushes. It worked, I think, but the reality was that I was simply feeding it. I was always wanting more and more to get my fix.

Eventually, I got to a point where all I could do was Call outlandish things on the internet. My wife and kids shunned me and left me a broken man. "They're through!" I'd shout at the heavens. "90 DAYS TOPS" I yelled... *long pause*

I just... I needed it. It needed ME, and I was obliged to answer its Call.

But, one day, I did it. I finally Called my Moby Dick and it was like *sobs* like a great weight lifting from my wallet. *weeps openly*

It�s ok frank. We�re here to help you.

Just be advised that we have several people calling the date of your next calling here. We understand. We can�t help it either.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:07

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

XK posted:

Dude has a custom edition Porsche. There's little more you can do to scream "pretend rich" than that. For anyone with any self awareness, it would be embarrassing.

Somewhere, Dave Ramsey hangs his head in shame and clicks his tongue.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:11

Pixelate: Jan 6, 2018; "You win by having fun"

WarpDogs posted:

Hey so I feel legitimately dumb for having to ask this, but what's the big deal behind the latest court response? Everyone is acting like Derek called something, but I can't tell what

It just looks like more posturing, which would be expected. Doesn't seem the needle has really moved one way or the other, or that we're any closer to the ELE

Is there something more substantial that I'm just seeing?

I think the main takeaways are:

Ortwin has been tricked into admitting he's got a conflict of interest of waiver which didn't mention his conflict of interest. He's planning to respond with a move called the faint and twitch.
French people have a superior hold over the law and see lumberjacks everywhere.
Croberts writes his name like he's all thumb.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:12

SoftNum: Mar 31, 2011

WarpDogs posted:

Hey so I feel legitimately dumb for having to ask this, but what's the big deal behind the latest court response? Everyone is acting like Derek called something, but I can't tell what

It just looks like more posturing, which would be expected. Doesn't seem the needle has really moved one way or the other, or that we're any closer to the ELE

Is there something more substantial that I'm just seeing?

The Ortwin Perjury thing is new. Everything else is just standard.

The real rubbing will be when discovery starts to leak.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:15

Dusty Lens: Jul 1, 2015; All Glory unto the Stimpire. Give up your arms and legs and embrace the beautiful agony of electricity that doubles in pain every second.

WarpDogs posted:

Hey so I feel legitimately dumb for having to ask this, but what's the big deal behind the latest court response? Everyone is acting like Derek called something, but I can't tell what

It just looks like more posturing, which would be expected. Doesn't seem the needle has really moved one way or the other, or that we're any closer to the ELE

Is there something more substantial that I'm just seeing?

Well you see we all thought the matter was basically resolved but it turns out that Skadden had another trick up their sleeve and boy was it a wildcard.

They responded to the response. We are now waiting for things to move ahead another step.

Furthermore no one saw it coming but then gosh dang if the phone didn't start ringing and could you guess who was on the line.

Summary: The month's theme of digging through responses to responses continues unabated and largely on schedule. Speculation and baseless predictions run rampant.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:15

Mr.Tophat: Apr 7, 2007; You clearly don't understand joke development

WarpDogs posted:

Hey so I feel legitimately dumb for having to ask this, but what's the big deal behind the latest court response? Everyone is acting like Derek called something, but I can't tell what

It just looks like more posturing, which would be expected. Doesn't seem the needle has really moved one way or the other, or that we're any closer to the ELE

Is there something more substantial that I'm just seeing?

In before Derek says three unadroit words or sentences punctuated with too much punctuation

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:16

Dusty Lens: Jul 1, 2015; All Glory unto the Stimpire. Give up your arms and legs and embrace the beautiful agony of electricity that doubles in pain every second.

Mr.Tophat posted:

In before Derek says three unadroit words or sentences punctuated with too much punctuation

Just assume I'm pasting 4-5 smilies here for comedic effect.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:18

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

AP posted:

The interesting thing to me is how pointless all this was.

According to Crytek, CIG got a cut price license deal for Cryengine, they could make SQ42 as long as it was launched from the Star Citizen.exe and not sold separately, had to keep Cryengine code under NDA, sought approval for third party contractors to use Cryengine (which Crytek had a reasonable duty to grant), had to use Cryengine for Star Citizen, with splash screen/logo and give Crytek bugfixes (which would just have been the changes CIG made to Cryengine, so a copy of the game code).

CIG dispute some of that but both sides agree that there was no more money due to Crytek.

So instead of just chugging along in their normal inept manner, Chris Roberts pisses Crytek off by refusing to call it Cryengine, "it's StaRenGine", sells SQ42 separately, removes the splash screen/logo and says they've moved to Lumberyard.

What do CIG get out of all that? Selling SQ42 separately as a $15 gamepack won't bring in much money as all the existing backers had it already, you could have just increased the price of the existing combined starter packages. They get some publicity from (press release only) move to Lumberyard, but the media see it as an engine change which historically isn't great, so that's not all positive coverage. They get to appear at Twitch events, Amazon give them a stand each time and promote them in a few videos.

Engine support switches from Crytek, who they paid for support, to Amazon who they didn't. They hired as many Crytek engineers as they could in the past so support shouldn't even be an issue. It's been a year since the public change so they've maybe been in contact with Amazon support for ~two years. This is Chris Roberts so he's probably fallen out with Amazon management by now and their engineers will not be bending over backwards to help.

If they'd just stolen Crytek staff, shown code on bugsmashers and forgot to get (rubber stamp) approval for a third party, Crytek would likely have just thought they were dicks and certainly not gone to court over it.

It was all pointless, pissing off Crytek far beyond stealing their staff didn't gain CIG any real long term advantage that I can see, none, ok maybe they have a cheaper game server cost deal but even that's doubtful. So now they have to settle with Crytek or discovery will open Pandora's box.

That CR manages to fail, literally it seems against all odds totally in his favor, is something of an accomplishment really.

When you have a golden carpet before you, and enough money to roll out golden carpet in front of your Porsche wherever you go, to still manage to trip on the flat ground, hit your face and barf all over the carpet before rolling off of it into the abyss of failure... is a true accomplishment.

Now, bare in mind that he got hugely rich and made enough personal wealth for himself and his family and friends that this could still be considered �successful�, it�s the fact that the end product will be nothing that is the true banner of measurement.

:youhaditallandyoufuckeditup.meme.gif:

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:21

Semisponge: Mar 9, 2006; I FUCKING LOVE BUTTS

the bracelet should be a $10,000 watch instead

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:22

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

AP posted:

Credit - Dapper Don

This spaceman is probably concerned about the black plastic part of his spaceship of choice and the implied danger it may have.

Then he remembers that the chances of that ship making into his game is laughable, and it�s a Chris Roberts game, so it may as well be a daffodil armed with Gatling guns tied to an afterburner and Star Citizen would make it work, as he recalls the all terrain buggy with tiny wheels inside another wheel and about 3 inches of clearance off the ground.

It�s really just fantasy.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:26

Dusty Lens: Jul 1, 2015; All Glory unto the Stimpire. Give up your arms and legs and embrace the beautiful agony of electricity that doubles in pain every second.

Raskolnikov posted:

The raw talent that comes out of this thread sometimes. God bless.

It makes me ashamed to type words in a space that otherwise could be art. But I know the artists seek to elevate us, so I must persist until one day I might suddenly know.

Then I too shall be art.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:28

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# ? Jun 8, 2024 18:24

The Titanic: Sep 15, 2016; Unsinkable

MilesK posted:

https://www.reddit.com/r/starcitizen/comments/7rmwww/i_drew_a_star_citizen_pinup_featuring_the/

This is good.

If this was the direction CIG went in with the game being crazy and feeling fun, I�d totally be on board for it even more!

All I can draw is hard core space ship porn, so hats off to the artist who did this Strangelove-Ian type reference and fun.

# ? Jan 21, 2018 04:30

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