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DominoKitten posted:Every single man I have ever lived with has left layers of piss droplets in the bathroom for me to clean up save one. My father. Roommates. Boyfriends. They did not and would not clean it up themselves, and some vociferously denied their own culpability, but I knew. And no, it's not on the seat, these men were not that abominable, it's a fine misting all around the toilet itself on the floor. Some of this is caused by the afore-mentioned peeing directly into the center because small bits splash out.
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Jan 26, 2018 21:27
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Every time I read one of these pee stories I just think about that John Updike passage about how women can't pee right because their insides are too complicated.
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Jan 26, 2018 21:31
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It not an aim thing with most guys... We're taking something a couple inches in diameter and aiming it as something a foot in diameter. Men aren't THAT uncoordinated. However, if you squeeze it a bit too hard (not talking hard enough to hurt or anything), the urethra gets a tiny bit pinched and it causes a bit of a sprinkler effect. Which is where the messes come from.
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Jan 26, 2018 21:34
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Pee doesnt always exit the wiener in a steady stream. Sometimes you get dual beams, sometimes it just sprays a lil at first, sometimes it comes out at an angle. It doesn't matter how hard you try, if you're a dude you'll pee on the floor/seat. What I dont get is why people just dont take 2 seconds to clean it up.
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Jan 26, 2018 21:35
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DominoKitten posted:Every single man I have ever lived with has left layers of piss droplets in the bathroom for me to clean up save one. My father. Roommates. Boyfriends. They did not and would not clean it up themselves, and some vociferously denied their own culpability, but I knew. And no, it's not on the seat, these men were not that abominable, it's a fine misting all around the toilet itself on the floor. I've lived with all women and I've lived with all men, and there's no comparison: the bathroom was always way dirtier with the women. I lived with two female roommates for a while and I had to wipe underneath the front of the seat every time after they pissed. Like if I happened to go in too soon after and lifted the seat to piss I was risking getting drops of piss all over my hand. It's happened with with some of the other women I've lived with too. maybe I've just lived with weirdos tho
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Jan 26, 2018 21:38
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I always put the seat back down after peeing because even as a man I find it annoying to have to put the seat down to go #2, especially if it's from someone else I'm also convinced that men who don't wipe up their piss dribbles have never actually cleaned their own toilet before e: Stevie Lee posted:I've lived with all women and I've lived with all men, and there's no comparison: the bathroom was always way dirtier with the women. I lived with two female roommates for a while and I had to wipe underneath the front of the seat every time after they pissed. Like if I happened to go in too soon after and lifted the seat to piss I was risking getting drops of piss all over my hand. It's happened with with some of the other women I've lived with too. this is true. I remember reading claims that janitors typically find women's restrooms to be messier than men's. there also seems to be a number of women so afraid to touch the toilet that they will hover and end up pissing all over the seat in the process, never wipe it up and never flush the toilet. because that involves touching things. meanwhile cellphones and keyboards carry like 5-10x more bacteria. the average person NEVER cleans those. the room in the house with the most bacteria and germs: the kitchen Scrotum Modem fucked around with this message at 22:01 on Jan 26, 2018 |
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Jan 26, 2018 21:42
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someone draw a diagram, this piss talk is too cerebral for me!
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Jan 26, 2018 21:43
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Obviously i'm gonna clean it up if i pee on the seat and more if there is a urethra resonance cascade but wiping the floor for remnants of pee mist is extreme to me. I'm much more disgusted by stepping onto a wet bath mat than I am imagining tiny droplets of pee that I can't see or feel.
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Jan 26, 2018 21:44
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LOVE LOVE SKELETON posted:someone draw a diagram, this piss talk is too cerebral for me! Nice try, Trump
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Jan 26, 2018 21:45
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I hate waking up and taking a piss and all of a sudden my stream is split in two and one is going in the bowl and the other is hitting the floor. You frantically rush to stop but your bladder is so full it's painful and you end up smacking your dick and getting piss all over your hands and ugh its too late, poo poo is already a mess
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Jan 26, 2018 22:00
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:Obviously i'm gonna clean it up if i pee on the seat and more if there is a urethra resonance cascade but wiping the floor for remnants of pee mist is extreme to me. I'm much more disgusted by stepping onto a wet bath mat than I am imagining tiny droplets of pee that I can't see or feel. Yeah, see, I'm not all that clean of a person overall, but the problem with this strategy is that eventually the bathroom started to smell faintly of piss at all times. Ruins the ambiance. It wouldn't end up a problem if they'd just cleaned the bathroom occasionally or when they were moving out, but no, that was beyond them.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:01
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Man, having a dick sounds complicated.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:02
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am I unique in having a bathroom that I pee normally in that is not constantly covered in piss crust  I mean, it's a moot point, since at the molecular level basically everything you have ever touched is smeared in fecal matter at all times you're welcome
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Jan 26, 2018 22:03
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RoboRodent posted:Man, having a dick sounds complicated. I can't complain
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Jan 26, 2018 22:06
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Men: sit down to pee.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:06
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Just live in a giant animal cage suspended over something so you can piss and poo poo wherever you want. Let gravity do the work for you.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:06
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La Brea Carpet posted:My [49 M] wife [49 F] has been getting angry at me for peeing standing up, and now literally glued down the toilet seat. I have important guests coming over and don't know what to tell them scorched earth: remove and throw out the toilet seat, force her to piss standing up
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Jan 26, 2018 22:15
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blarzgh posted:Men: sit down to pee. I did this one time and the double piss stream made piss go between the seat and the rim so half of my piss was all over the floor. I didn't notice until my socks and pants started getting wet.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:18
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blarzgh posted:Men: sit down to pee. you'll have to glue my toilet shut
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Jan 26, 2018 22:18
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peepees seem poorly thought out
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Jan 26, 2018 22:19
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blarzgh posted:Men: sit down to pee. Nah, I'll just continue to mop once a week and wipe down the walls once a month.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:20
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blarzgh posted:Men: sit down to pee. if i was paralyzed i would still make the herculean effort required to shift my atrophied husk body into a standing position when it came time to piss i'd develop telekinesis if i had to
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Jan 26, 2018 22:20
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cock hero flux posted:scorched earth: remove and throw out the toilet seat, force her to piss standing up There are women who can and will do this in public restrooms in lieu of putting their bottoms on a public toilet seat and the results are horrifying and much more immediate than piss mist.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:22
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In my life I have dated two men who sat down to pee. I have also known several women who stood to pee.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:23
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DominoKitten posted:There are women who can and will do this in public restrooms in lieu of putting their bottoms on a public toilet seat and the results are horrifying and much more immediate than piss mist. Ironically enough, if these women had simply been taught to put up any toilet seat they have no intention of using, toilet seats in women's restrooms would be in a lot better shape in general
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Jan 26, 2018 22:24
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Jeffrey of YOSPOS posted:urethra resonance cascade
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Jan 26, 2018 22:25
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Danaru posted:lmao yep she deleted it, I still had it open in a tab though: https://www.reddit.com/r/relationships/comments/7t5iuh/my_husband_27m_was_upset_i_went_to_the_gym_and/?st=jcw5lxnj&sh=cecd0e0e https://www.reddit.com/user/aggressiverough/comments/ the comments are hysterical. Choice highlights: quote:He pretends everything is ok when he gets home at night, but we haven’t had sex in like 3 or 4 months. The last time we did, he didn’t finish and it was just the most depressing love making I’ve ever done. girl pants posted:Hubs also "let" her go to yoga and then insisted he doesn't have time for counseling while still spending hours sleeping. It is a matter of national importance that these two remain married. From the original post: My husband works 6 days a week. He gets home by 10 or 11 PM M-F and either 4PM or 10PM on Saturday. If I was working till 10PM 6 days a week yah I'd be loving sleeping in Sunday morning.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:26
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RoboRodent posted:Man, having a dick sounds complicated.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:29
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Hughlander posted:https://www.reddit.com/user/aggressiverough/comments/ the comments are hysterical. I get the sneaking suspicion it isn't work keeping him til 10 or 11 o'clock.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:31
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Cat Army
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RoboRodent posted:Man, having a dick sounds complicated. seriously
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Jan 26, 2018 22:31
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RoboRodent posted:Man, having a dick sounds complicated. Compared to vaginas, they're the ABCs.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:33
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I dont know why everyone's freaking out, urine is sterile so technically you're just making the seat/floor cleaner
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Jan 26, 2018 22:33
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cock hero flux posted:if i was paralyzed i would still make the herculean effort required to shift my atrophied husk body into a standing position when it came time to piss Do not worry my friend, there are such things as standing wheelchairs.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:35
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DominoKitten posted:Yeah, see, I'm not all that clean of a person overall, but the problem with this strategy is that eventually the bathroom started to smell faintly of piss at all times. Ruins the ambiance. It wouldn't end up a problem if they'd just cleaned the bathroom occasionally or when they were moving out, but no, that was beyond them. Yeah my post goes along with the assumption that the bathroom floors are still cleaned regularly enough - let's say once a month or so. I am not gonna wipe down the floor every time I pee but "never" isn't really a choice either.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:35
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Capri Sun Tzu posted:I dont know why everyone's freaking out, urine is sterile so technically you're just making the seat/floor cleaner The solution is for all bathrooms to have urinals just like in some countries all bathrooms have bidets.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:36
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Urine does not smell good. Do not leave it on your bathroom floor.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:41
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girl pants posted:peepees seem poorly thought out Counter point: a baby will never ever come out of one
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Jan 26, 2018 22:43
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Peaceful Anarchy posted:No it isn't but even if it were, it's full of yummy nutrients for bacteria to feed on and multiply. So once it's lying on a seat/floor it sure isn't sterile. Or for any other reason
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Jan 26, 2018 22:43
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Demon Of The Fall posted:I hate waking up and taking a piss and all of a sudden my stream is split in two and one is going in the bowl and the other is hitting the floor. You frantically rush to stop but your bladder is so full it's painful and you end up smacking your dick and getting piss all over your hands and ugh its too late, poo poo is already a mess
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Jan 26, 2018 22:50
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Demon Of The Fall posted:I hate waking up and taking a piss and all of a sudden my stream is split in two and one is going in the bowl and the other is hitting the floor. You frantically rush to stop but your bladder is so full it's painful and you end up smacking your dick and getting piss all over your hands and ugh its too late, poo poo is already a mess Lean over the toilet to angle down HTH.
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Jan 26, 2018 22:58
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