/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

SpiderHyphenMan: Apr 1, 2010; by Fluffdaddy

Chomp8645 posted:

Must not be that hard to imagine after all there are hundreds of thousands of Twitch subscribers.

My (27F) relationship with my internet love interest (33M) is starting to feel one sided. When do I cut it off?

quote:

I've been involved in a romantic/sexual relationship with a streamer guy I met on twitch for almost 3 years. I am very well known in his stream but no one knows we're romantically involved (he's not a big streamer, it's a fairly small community). We both live in separate countries and have agreed to not make things official since we have no financial means to meet any time soon. Though we have both confessed to each other that we are falling in love with each other, we pretty much agreed to keep things the way they are until we could meet. (I should mention, we are both very flirty people and tend to flirt with other people on twitch. Also his sister has been staying with him the past few months and is pretty much around all the time.)

Lately he's been acting distant in the romance department. He still talks to me almost every day in a friendly way, but hasn't acted any more than friendly for the past 1-2 months or so. Which is unusual since he use to flirt with me all the time. I casually brought this up in an indirect way and he just said "everything is fine, don't worry about it, I've told you already how I felt about you. I'm just reluctant since my sister is here to say anything."

I understand this, believe me, but I still see him flirting with other girls. It didn't really bother me before that he flirted with other girls because hey, I am flirty too and do the same thing. It does start to bother me when I see him flirt with other girls but never flirt with me. The person who he is "supposedly" in love with. The only thing remotely close to romantic we've done was a brief phone sex instance a few weeks ago. It feels like he's acting like he doesn't really need to try to keep me around anymore, since he knows how I feel about him and seems to think I'm not going anywhere.

I'm starting to get frustrated and impatient and wonder what's going on with him. He almost seems like he is trying to friend zone me without telling me. Should I try and be more patient and see what happens after his sister leaves? Should I demand a more up front explanation? Maybe try distancing myself from him? Or should I just act super casual about it like I didn't notice and play it cool? I obviously don't want to scare him away. Or should I try and end things since this relationship really seems to be going no where? This last option would be so hard for me since not only are we best friends, but I'm very involved in his community. I don't really have any real life friends. I would lose all the friends I made and people would wonder where I went. Ugh. I'm so confused.

TLDR; The guy I met on twitch seems like he might be trying to friend zone me. When is it time to cut it off?

# ? Apr 7, 2018 23:07

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 09:34

Mocking Bird: Aug 17, 2011

Approximately three years ago

# ? Apr 7, 2018 23:15

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

# ? Apr 7, 2018 23:20

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

You know what they say, wait until the third ~~date~~ year to have ~~sex~~ brief phone sex.

# ? Apr 7, 2018 23:33

DisDisDis: Dec 22, 2013

Darkrenown posted:

No, but you have reminded me of the woman who demanded her BF eat her rear end every night so she could sleep.

https://twitter.com/dril/status/828104135400706049?lang=en

# ? Apr 8, 2018 00:13

Metis of the Chat Thread: Aug 1, 2014

Guy [28M] that I [25F] have been dating for two months giving me the silent treatment after I turn down his invitation to Netflix and chill because I wanted to go home and sleep instead

quote:

TL;DR: Guy I'm dating starts ignoring me after I turned down his offer to come over at his place in favor of going home to sleep.
The guy is also a redditor, but I'm posting this with minimal edits anyway because I'm lost on how to proceed.

I [25F] met Matthew [28M] six months ago on a subreddit's casual IRL meet-up. We didn't really get to talk to each other as I was mingling with other people at the time, so he didn't really make an impression on me. Later on I joined the subreddit's casual Discord channel, of which he was a member. He reached out to me first and this is when we started to get to know each other.

He asked me out after a few weeks of chatting, and while he wasn't my usual type we clicked in chat so I thought it was worth one date.
Sure enough, it was.

We really hit it off after the first date, and since then we were going out at least once a week, unless we couldn't because of work obligations. We have a lot of common interests, conversations came and flowed easily, and I could feel myself relaxing around his presence so I became optimistic about where things were going.

The problem started shortly after our last date. We watched a movie, had dinner then walked around a nearby park just talking and joking for hours. It was getting pretty late, and while we were in no real hurry to end the date we both had our own thing to do the next day, so we couldn't stay out for long anyway. While we were talking about what we could do before going our separate ways he suddenly invites me to come over to his place, which was a short walk away from where we were.

It was the first time he has offered to stay over, and I was surprised as it came out of nowhere. He talked about a lot of casual things we could do at his place, but the way he said them involved sexual subtext.

While I was taken aback by the sudden offer I wasn't completely against it either. However, my sleeping patterns have gone to poo poo (he knows this), and I've been working towards fixing my sleep schedule because I've been waking up tired and cranky due to lack of a good night's rest.

I kind of dawdled on answering as I was still weighing the pros and cons. Finally, I gave him my answer and told him to ask me again on our next date. He seemed a little disappointed, but I thought he took it graciously and then we parted ways for the evening.

The silent treatment/ghosting started the next day. He's always been eager to start the convos more often than not, so it was strange when he went silent the next day. And the next. And the next. He's a busy guy but we've never missed three days of convos in a row so I was starting to get confused. When I did initiate our recent chats his replies were shallow and unenthusiastic, which confused me even more.

It has been four days since we last talked to each other in chat. I was discouraged by his short replies so I haven't initiated another conversation since. I have thought of asking him if me turning him down last time is the cause of the issue but I don't know how to tell him without sounding clingy.

Some background on my dating history: I'm a late bloomer who started dating after I graduated college. I've dated some guys since then but none of them really move past the six-month period, so when it comes to romance and relationships I guess I'm pretty virginal. I'm usually quiet and reserved when it comes to flirting and displays of affection, which gives the impression of me being frigid. Could this be part of the problem?Frankly I hate hate hate ghosting, playing hard to get and all these dating mind games and if that's what's really happening then I'm just thinking of cutting my losses and moving on.

Did I do something wrong in prioritizing my beauty sleep? Was I too frigid? What should I do now?

# ? Apr 8, 2018 00:35

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

Gluten Freeman posted:

Guy [28M] that I [25F] have been dating for two months giving me the silent treatment after I turn down his invitation to Netflix and chill because I wanted to go home and sleep instead

There's other dudes out there, better luck next time.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 00:38

Haifisch: Nov 13, 2010; Objection! I object! That was... objectionable!; Taco Defender

My [26F] mom [60F] sends me 20-40 dollars worth of dollar store toys every single holiday, for the past 6 years

quote:

When I started college, my mom started sending me care packages. In my sophomore year, she started sending toys and decorations from the dollar store to me and my roommates as sort of a funny joke. We thought it was funny, and would hang up the silly decorations and mess around with the toys. Toys like, rubber animals that grow three times their size in water, silly putty, giant fuzzy pens, silly eyeball glasses.... I guess that positive feedback she got made her want to do it again. And then again. And agaaaaaain...

So here I am, over six years later, into my third year in grad school. I still get these every holiday. Easter, Valentine's Day, St. Patrick's Day, Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas (although this is in my stocking and not shipped), and even my birthday. For Halloween, I got about 20 dollars of dollar store toys in a box, plus I live across the country so shipping is roughly 20 dollars. The issue is, a gag gift isn't funny the 20th time. She also sends these to my sister (28F), but she finds them funny still, although she has said that she throws away 75% of it.

People tell me I should just suck it up and it makes her happy, but it's gotten to the point where it's so annoying. Even my boyfriend has told me this. Packages sit on the table for a couple days and then go straight into the trash. She's spending probably over 250 a year on this, 500 if you include my sister. Most of it can't be donated, the decorations are pretty useless (think cut out paper were wolf footprints or really ugly things covered in glitter), and most of the toys are cheap and useless. I also don't know any kids to give these to.

The biggest problem is my mom is very sensitive, and our relationship isn't the best. If I ever go against her or not tell her something or spend time with bf's family she immediately jumps to the, "You don't love me, you're ashamed of the family." I half want to just let things go on, and tbh, I probably will. But I thought I'd reach out to reddit and see if anyone has an idea of some wording that wouldn't set off a completely oversensitive mom. A current thought is possibly connecting it to using the money she doesn't spend on toys and shipping to donate to the local animal shelter (which she adopted a dog from years ago), or to a some other cause. But even this is hard to word in a way that wouldn't upset her. This poo poo is going to go on forever. :c

tldr; My mom sends me hundreds dollars of dollar store toys and decorations a year, she's overly sensitive, how do I make it staaawp.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 01:19

dudeness: Mar 5, 2010; Cat Army; Fallen Rib

Donate them to a local goodwill or salvation army so the next crazy woman can buy them all for her ungrateful child and the cycle continues forever and ever.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 01:24

DragQueenofAngmar: Dec 29, 2009; You shall not pass!

lol am I just getting used to reading these or are they actually getting more and more transparently "I know there's no magical answer that will fix everything with zero stress, but please give me one, Reddit?"

like that lady knows her choice is to either just do what's she's been doing or upset her mom. does she really think someone is gonna come in like "here's how to bend reality to your wishes with no downsides!"

# ? Apr 8, 2018 01:45

Barudak: May 7, 2007

Surely some mad scientist with a mind control ray who needs help covering this months rent posts on r/relationships

# ? Apr 8, 2018 01:48

Clark Nova: Jul 18, 2004

Turn all the lovely little dolls into voodoo dolls of your mom. Maybe that'll kill her and save you the stress of having a conversation with her.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 02:44

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Midnight Voyager posted:

If she even has a school counselor. We didn't.

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: school counsellors are the most useless people on god's green earth.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 03:31

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

lol am I just getting used to reading these or are they actually getting more and more transparently "I know there's no magical answer that will fix everything with zero stress, but please give me one, Reddit?"

like that lady knows her choice is to either just do what's she's been doing or upset her mom. does she really think someone is gonna come in like "here's how to bend reality to your wishes with no downsides!"

A lot of em don't really want advice, they just want sympathy or to tell a story and have somebody listen. like, sometimes they're utter worms terrified of ever risking a conflict but pretty sure this girl here doesn't even really have a problem and just thought she'd get better reception with her odd little story on r/relationships than r/mildlyinteresting (oh god why is there a mildlyinteresting subreddit, why is it enormous)

A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 03:41 on Apr 8, 2018

# ? Apr 8, 2018 03:38

andrew smash: Jun 26, 2006; smooth soul

Donate everything to a preschool or women�s shelter, brighten the holiday for some kids.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 03:39

Dunning Krugerrand: Dec 23, 2015; purestrain pyrite

This one starts off with the gross crazy bits then takes a sharp left turn into depressing, just FYI. If I bolded the worst parts it would end up being over 3/4 of the post so just start at the top and read until you can't take it anymore.

My [25F] dad [56M] got his own poop all over my apartment. Now I overwhelmed with memories and emotions from my childhood. I am unsure how to proceed.

quote:

TL;DR: My dad drank a fifth of whisky, pooped himself, and got it all over my apartment. The event scared me because it reminded me of when he was unstable when I was a small child. Do I bring it up or let sleeping dogs lie?

My dad lives out of state, about 1,000 miles from me. About three weeks ago, he came over for a visit. My sister also came from out of town (different state than my dad lives) so she could visit everyone.

My dad, my sister [28F], some of our friends, my husband, and me all when out for some drinks on Friday night. Since it was a gorgeous day, we spent the majority of the afternoon sipping beer on rooftop bars and eating various snacks. It was a fun day of catching up, especially with our friends, �Jane� [24F] and �Maggie� [30sF].

My dad and I had a touch and go relationship when I was a kid, but when I got to college, we kept in touch better. I get along well with his wife, my stepmom. For school breaks, he'd make it a point to invite me and pay for a plane ticket for me to see him. So I was excited to get a whole weekend just to hang out with him and catch up.

While we were out drinking, my dad was paying for drinks and making our friends laugh. We were generally having a good time. We took a ride share to the bars, and Jane and Maggie had already made plans to spend the night at my place.

Near the end of the night, my dad started to get handsy with Jane. He rubbed her shoulders, which didn�t phase me. But then he kissed Jane's neck. My eyes widened, but Jane didn't seem upset. I didn't say anything then. I feel mad and angry at myself that I didn�t. I�ve never seen my dad engage in unwanted contact before, so it definitely caught me off guard. When we got back to my apartment that night, I busied myself with blowing up air mattresses for everyone. My dad sat down to have a night cap. When he noticed that we were one bed short, he asked Jane if she would like to share the guest bed with him as it was a queen sized. Jane played it off really cool and said she didn�t like sharing. She took an air mattress and Maggie took the couch.

I do want to say that my dad and Jane already knew each other well because Jane had accompanied me on trips to see my dad and stepmom. Part of the reason she was with us that night was to catch up with my dad, who she saw as a role model and mentor. It�s been an ongoing joke between my dad and stepmom that Jane might have an innocent school girl-like crush on my dad. She�ll send him articles that she finds fascinating and once went to visit him and my stepmom without me. But she also sends me articles that she thinks I�ll find fascinating, and my dad and stepmom did give her an open invitation to visit them (they live in a vacation destination). My point is that Jane has never flirted with my dad and never gave him any indication that she wanted to engage in any sort of sexual activity with him and that her behavior towards him has never been anything else than close family friend. If anything, she looked up to him as a father figure. But I think my dad might�ve tried to take advantage of a perceived crush. If Jane did have a crush on my dad, then it is still my dad�s fault for trying to take advantage of young, intoxicated woman.

When everyone was tucked into bed with a pillows and blankets, I found my own bed. But around 3:45 in the morning, I was awoken to a knock on my door. It was my sister. She whispered �Dad made a mess in the bathroom.� I got out of bed and went to the bathroom, nearly throwing up when I saw the mess. There was poop ALL OVER the bathroom. There were large chunks all over the floor, the back of the toilet was smeared in it, it was all over the toilet seat. A little had made it into the actual toilet, but most of it was in the bathroom. I immediately threw away my bath mat, which was so thick with feces, there was no salvaging it. The most disturbing bit, however, had to be a my dad�s underwear, buried in a pile of poo poo on the bathroom floor because the implication was that he was naked and had walked through the living room naked.

My sister and I spent an hour cleaning the bathroom, trying to tiptoe around our sleeping friends. At around 6 am, I sent a text to my stepmom, who stays on early schedule, asking if she was awake. I called and gave her a full recap, telling her all about the poop and how my dad had interacted with Jane. I also told my stepmom about the bottle of whisky my dad had purchased for himself the day earlier. We found a fifth of whisky that had been full on Friday morning almost empty, meaning my dad had consumed it sometime between coming back from the bars and him going to bed that night.

At around 7, my dad woke up again and started to walk through the living room. He was in a zombie like state, naked from the waist down, and still covered in poop. Everyone, including my sister who had managed to go back to bed, was asleep. I threw a towel at my dad, whispering �cover up!�. But he didn�t hear me. He went back to the bathroom, covering the toilet seat in poop again. He walked naked through the living room again, back to the guest room. I tried to lie back down, but couldn�t sleep. At around 9 am, everyone started waking up. When I put the coffee on and bagels in the oven to toast, my dad woke up. I yelled at him if he pants on. He said that he did. I knew then that he was no longer drunk.

Maggie and Jane decided to leave, and my sister, husband and I decided to go on an outing. He had gotten in touch with my stepmom, who had instructed him to spend the day cleaning my apartment and getting things back in order.

When we got back that evening, however, my dad was still covered in poop, had not washed himself properly, and had gotten poop all over my apartment. I found it on the walls, on my couch, on my kitchen chairs, and on several of my kitchen towels (it looks like he tried to wipe himself with my kitchen towels). I lost it then. I screamed at him and cried.

My dad did finally take a shower, and he started to spot clean my apartment. There was still a foul odor in my apartment, and I went to bed on Saturday night utterly exhausted after a sleepless night. When I woke on Sunday morning, my dad was dressed in clean clothes. He had gone to the store and bought the most expensive steam cleaner they had. He had already steam cleaned the entirety of the guest room, bed, carpet and all. He then proceeded to clean the rest of my apartment, even taking a spot out of the couch that had been there before Deuce Heard �Round the World. He then took me to my favorite brunch place and left, promising to send me a check so I could replace the rest of the things he destroyed.

My dad made amends to me, apologized to Jane, sent me a sizable amount of money to buy new things, and hasn�t touched alcohol since that night. But the reason why things upset me so much is because they reminded me of the rocky, unstable time when my parents were freshly divorced, before my dad had met my stepmom. I don�t know how to make that a narrative, so here are the things my dad did when I was younger in no particular:

He would regularly lock the house up and lock one or all of me and siblings outside while he ran errands for hours. The first time it happened, I was six. It got dark and started raining before he came back home.

He bought my sister a fancy camera when she expressed interest in photography. To test out the camera, he had her take pictures of his girlfriend at the time topless because the girlfriend had recently gotten her nipples pierced. My sister was about eleven.

He rented a farm house that came complete with a barn and rented the rooms out to strangers. The strangers cooked meth in the barn. We were there for the drug bust and there was finished meth inside the house. My tooth brush went missing during that time, and I was afraid of telling my dad that my toothbrush was missing (lots of things went missing as the meth heads stole a lot of things). I developed two abscessed teeth during that time that later had to be pulled. I was ten.

I was bit by a squirrel. I told my dad who told me that rabies shots were expensive and painful. That was all. He didn�t take me to get one of those expensive, painful shots. I was eight.

My brother (two years younger than me) fell off a fence and got a giant gash in his side. When we went looking for a band aid to help dress the wound, my dad shouted at us that a band aid would �just make it look worse than it was.� My brother was five. My brother still carries that scar on his side. A hospital visit wouldn�t have been uncalled for in that scenario.

There were other minor events, like the time we were at walmart and he told me and my brother to look at the movies. When he picked one out, he screamed at us that he had just bought us a new movie two weeks before and that we were spoiled because our mom couldn�t say no to us. My brother and I were four and six respectively.

My mom and dad divorced when I was five. My dad had affairs (plural), which eventually led to the end of their marriage. Any time we showed any discourse to having to see our dad, my dad would tell us that our mom was manipulating us. He never understood how his behavior made us feel scared and sad. He was loose cannon back in those days, anything and everything seeming to set him off. We were kids, and sometimes we did things that were annoying or hard to deal with. We saw our dad on the weekends, and everything felt different at his house. His food was greasy, heavy and bland (usually roasted meat and root vegetables) while our mom cooked things like veggie stew, grilled chicken and spaghetti with meat sauce. He said our mom was �spoiling� us with the food she served us. My dad also had random screaming fits (or random to kid me) where he just seemed to lash out for no reason. If I had been an adult, maybe I could have found a pattern.

When I was around twelve, my dad met my stepmom, and things stabilized with him. He stopped having random screaming matches. I was old enough, too, that I knew to brush my teeth and bathe myself. I didn�t need to be taken care of. I had a touch and go relationship with him until college where I found myself being able to visit him without my mom rolling her eyes and saying �I don�t know why you want to see him. He�s just going to make you feel sad.�

My dad to this day believes that he wasn�t that bad of a parent, that my mom was manipulating us and causing us hesitation to see him. This isn�t untrue, but a part of the reason why my mom acted the way she did is because my dad did have a history of not taking care of us well. All of these things I mentioned in this post were reported to a judge, who eventually gave my mom full custody of me and my siblings when she wanted to move out of state.

I have told most of these things to my stepmom. I told her when I was fourteen, about a month before she and my dad got married. She gave me a reply saying that understood how I felt, but she was also a little dismissive, believing that the stories I told her were warped and manipulated by my mom, my dad�s evil ex.

Now I feel stuck, unsure how to proceed. My mom has acted in a way to me that made me wonder if her influence made me see my dad in a more negative light than I would have otherwise (she and I aren�t speaking right now, but it�s about things I don�t want to mention because this is about me and my dad right now). But the past three weeks, I keep having these intense memories and emotions from my childhood. I�m not sure if bringing them up right now would be productive. But I also feel like it would be hard to resume a normal relationship with me dad if these things weren�t put out there for discussion. Is there any advice on how to proceed?

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:08

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Haifisch posted:

My [26F] mom [60F] sends me 20-40 dollars worth of dollar store toys every single holiday, for the past 6 years

Donate them and write off the donation. Tell your mom you love her. That mom is going to die someday and there will be no one left who loves you unconditionally.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:10

ArbitraryC: Jan 28, 2009; Pick a number, any number; Pillbug

DragQueenofAngmar posted:

lol am I just getting used to reading these or are they actually getting more and more transparently "I know there's no magical answer that will fix everything with zero stress, but please give me one, Reddit?"

like that lady knows her choice is to either just do what's she's been doing or upset her mom. does she really think someone is gonna come in like "here's how to bend reality to your wishes with no downsides!"

Something I've learned in relationships? 99/100 they don't want solutions they just want to vent to and for you to say "yeah it's unfair you're in this position".

That said there was a similar story about unwanted repeated gifts (fudge) where the reddit commentators actually had some p good suggestions the OP hadn't thought of that would help smooth over the situation.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:10

HIJK: Nov 25, 2012; in the room where you sleep

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

This one starts off with the gross crazy bits then takes a sharp left turn into depressing, just FYI. If I bolded the worst parts it would end up being over 3/4 of the post so just start at the top and read until you can't take it anymore.

My [25F] dad [56M] got his own poop all over my apartment. Now I overwhelmed with memories and emotions from my childhood. I am unsure how to proceed.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:26

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Haifisch posted:

My [26F] mom [60F] sends me 20-40 dollars worth of dollar store toys every single holiday, for the past 6 years

Don't allow your mom's aggression to go unchecked. Save them for 2 years then send them back, stating you're keeping the tradition alive. This will result in an arms race where you eventually buy each other worthwhile gifts like tickets to a monster truck rally or laser tag.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:32

Xik: Mar 10, 2011; Dinosaur Gum

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

My [25F] dad [56M] got his own poop all over my apartment. Now I overwhelmed with memories and emotions from my childhood. I am unsure how to proceed.

Jesus, what a poo poo show.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:40

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

This one starts off with the gross crazy bits then takes a sharp left turn into depressing, just FYI. If I bolded the worst parts it would end up being over 3/4 of the post so just start at the top and read until you can't take it anymore.

My [25F] dad [56M] got his own poop all over my apartment. Now I overwhelmed with memories and emotions from my childhood. I am unsure how to proceed.

quote:

I was bit by a squirrel. I told my dad who told me that rabies shots were expensive and painful. That was all. He didn�t take me to get one of those expensive, painful shots. I was eight.

Amazing.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 04:51

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

ArbitraryC posted:

Something I've learned in relationships? 99/100 they don't want solutions they just want to vent to and for you to say "yeah it's unfair you're in this position".

That said there was a similar story about unwanted repeated gifts (fudge) where the reddit commentators actually had some p good suggestions the OP hadn't thought of that would help smooth over the situation.

Well yeah, it's mostly to vent, and it'll be hyperbolized. That's what I do. Frankly Hugh was (is?) a good dude but we were both not in a good place and weren't very good communicators. The rest just fell from that but it shouldn't reflect negatively on him. All the best to him, he is a good person though he has had some tough times which unfortunately I contributed to more than I helped.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 05:32

YeahTubaMike: Mar 24, 2005; *hic* Gotta finish thish . . .; Doctor Rope

oh my god just shut the gently caress up about hugh forever PLEASE

this thread is good when it's not about that guy

# ? Apr 8, 2018 06:18

hanales: Nov 3, 2013

Haifisch posted:

My [26F] mom [60F] sends me 20-40 dollars worth of dollar store toys every single holiday, for the past 6 years

This and that fudge story make me so angry. My mother has given me a couple Cadbury creme eggs every year on Easter (she gets my wife candy she likes and gets my son an Easter basket to be clear). I haven�t eaten a Cadbury cream egg since I was like 19, but she�s in her late 60s and at some point she won�t be around anymore, and it makes her happy. I know when she dies I�m going to miss that kind of poo poo. So suck it up and tell your mom you love her and think she�s hilarious for the harmless poo poo they do to make you happy.

Just arrrghh it�s so inconsequential how can you get aggravated by something like that.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 09:39

Serephina: Nov 8, 2005; 恐竜戦隊
ジュウレンジャー

YeahTubaMike posted:

oh my god just shut the gently caress up about hugh forever PLEASE

this thread is good when it's not about that guy

This is a pleasant reminder that you can just put all of the trolls and shitposters on squelch. Profiles -> Ignore list.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 12:26

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

Regret moving in with online girlfriend 25M/20F

quote:

Mobile post.

I met my now-girlfriend gaming online. She lived in Kentucky and I lived in California. We meshed well and decided to live together after some months of online dating. I�ve now been in Kentucky with her and her parents for about 8 months and honestly I just don�t want to be here anymore. I miss CA, my friends and family back in CA and my privacy. I�m always around her or her parents here. I can�t go anywhere because there isn�t anywhere to go that isn�t miles and miles away. I miss being single and being free. I almost feel trapped here in a way.

She�s very immature IRL and has a very juvenile sense of humor. I don�t care about half of the things she talks about and never want to play games with her anymore. I don�t know whats changed, but I just want to be gone from here. She calls taquitos �spic sticks� and thinks its hilarious.

I�m black by the way and she and her family are white, as 90% of our area is, so it just makes me feel uncomfortable to know she thinks racist poo poo is funny while I�m the token.

I�m thinking of just leaving without saying anything, or if I do, it�ll be the day of and something small to the effect of �Its just not working.� as I�m heading out.

I am definitely not involving her parents. That will just make this super awkward and I don�t want to deal with them. They�ll know I�m gone when she tells them herself later that day when they get home from work.

I know that I don�t love her and never want to marry her but I think I�ve been staying because I do care about her to some degree still but that�s me staying for the wrong reasons and mostly out of me feeling bad rather than love.

What should I do?

tl;dr Met online, moved to KY, living in GFs house with her parents, she�s immature and I�ve had enough, thinking of leaving without saying anything.

quote:

Have you watched the film "Get Out"? If not, you really should and you can thank me later.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 13:05

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

Is my girlfriend losing interest

quote:

My girlfriend [19F] and I [19M] have been dating for two months. Now this last week I tried to move things on to sex because she comfortable talking about sex with her previous boyfriend. We had a long talk about sex and the future. She decided that we will never have sex and that we shouldn�t make out, what should I do about this?

She says the reason is because she feels like it is wrong and goes against the Bible and what her parents taught her, but she is perfectly fine dropping acid. Which is why this puzzled me.

TL;DR- I think my girlfriend has no interest in me and it bugs me that she was so sexually attracted to her last boyfriend but not me

lol

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:00

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Ghost Leviathan posted:

I've said it before, and I'll say it again: school counsellors are the most useless people on god's green earth.

Truth.

Being relentlessly bullied? Oh, just ignore it.

Suicide attempt? I�ll meet with you once because it�s protocol, but you seem fine.

I�m not sure what other avenues that girl would have, aside from talking to her GP doctor who might be able to talk to her mom/give her some resources. I sure as heck had no idea what to do at that age.

My mother�s advice was �well if you�re upset or you had a bad day, bake cookies or something. Don�t down a bottle of pills.�

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:18

Fatkraken: Jun 23, 2005; Fun-time is over.

hanales posted:

This and that fudge story make me so angry. My mother has given me a couple Cadbury creme eggs every year on Easter (she gets my wife candy she likes and gets my son an Easter basket to be clear). I haven�t eaten a Cadbury cream egg since I was like 19, but she�s in her late 60s and at some point she won�t be around anymore, and it makes her happy. I know when she dies I�m going to miss that kind of poo poo. So suck it up and tell your mom you love her and think she�s hilarious for the harmless poo poo they do to make you happy.

Just arrrghh it�s so inconsequential how can you get aggravated by something like that.

I think the occasional creme egg and a literal fudge themed engagement holiday or $500 worth of money being wasted on literal useless junk are a bit different. It's frustrating when people only buy things you hate, not so much for the opportunity cost of getting a better gift, but because it makes you feel like a liar when you pretend to like them. Plus it's a shame to have to throw things away, I hate waste and would feel bad having to just bin stuff that someone had bought with good intentions.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:21

an overdue owl: Feb 26, 2012; hoot

YeahTubaMike posted:

oh my god just shut the gently caress up about hugh forever PLEASE

this thread is good when it's not about that guy

crazy you don't find repetitive, navel gazing, attention seeking posts from generic self obsessed lady the highlight of your day

ominous edit here depending on how good your imagination is

When can I put my(f56) brother's(m51) dead animals in the trash?

quote:

Background: My brother does not currently live with my mother and I. He moved back in last year and brought 12 animals with him. (he's separated from his wife). He moved out over the summer (to his own condo, just up the road), but I guess he's planning on moving back. The house belongs to my mom, she's 84 and in poor health, I'm her full-time caretaker. When he left, he took most of the animals with him, leaving only a few lizards which aren't really a bother (not like the cat he brought which my cat hated).

So anyway. Shortly before he left, Bella the Bunny died. He put her in a box and put her in our freezer. Then sometime over the summer, Gordon the Gecko died, another animal in the freezer. (this one in just a plastic bag)

I feel petty for minding this, but these animals aren't small, they are taking up space. And my brother has a pretty horrible track record with animals in the freezer. He put a dead cat in his own freezer, back in his house in VA, until he could 'get around' to burying it. Bad winter, 6-day power outage, then another, and another. After SIX years, he took the entire freezer to the dump, without ever opening it again.

This will not happen with my freezer! We just got it, it's made life so much easier and cheaper (taking advantage of sales, not having to do a big shopping every week, etc.).

He claims his kids are 'attached' to the animals, and want to be around for the burial. The animals were here for a year, they never once came to visit. (They also never came to visit their grandma, but that's NOMB).

So, how long do I have to wait, before tossing his dead animals? Or is this something that's up to my mom, as it's her house? But he's the only son, the sun shines out his arse.

I do all the cooking, every time I go in the freezer I'm reaching around dead gecko. The thing is 18"!

TL,DR: I want to toss my brother's dead animals.

edit: he got a one week notice. It did not go well.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:41

tactlessbastard: Feb 4, 2001; Godspeed, post; Fun Shoe

quote:

She decided that we will never have sex

She's not wrong!

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:47

But Rocks Hurt Head: Jun 30, 2003; by Hand Knit; Pillbug

Dunning Krugerrand posted:

My [25F] dad [56M] got his own poop all over my apartment. Now I overwhelmed with memories and emotions from my childhood. I am unsure how to proceed.

Time to take my clearly alcoholic dad out for a fun time at the bars with my friends, what could possibly go wrong?

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:51

girl pants: Sep 21, 2006; I feel a great disturbance in my pants

an overdue owl posted:

When can I put my(f56) brother's(m51) dead animals in the trash?

Cook the gecko

Also, my phone's autocorrect knows grok but not gecko. Why

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:56

Palpek: Dec 27, 2008; Do you feel it, Zach?
My coffee warned me about it.

an overdue owl posted:

When can I put my(f56) brother's(m51) dead animals in the trash?

UPDATE: Oops, well that escalated. Re. When can I put my(f56) brother's(m51) dead animals in the trash?

quote:

I talked to my mom about it, she agreed that she wanted the animals out of the freezer.

So when my bro came by to pick up his dog tonight, I told him mom and I wanted the animals out of there, or I would toss them by next trash day (a week away) and he went OFF. WHO ARE YOU TO BLAH BLAH, DON'T YOU DARE, YOU'LL REGRET IT!!

I asked him if he was threatening me, he said "Yes, I am." I said "with what? Are you going to call the cops on me for dumping dead pets? Are you going to hit me?" (oh please, oh please, all I need is one order of protection against this lunatic).

Turns out he actually thinks he has cause to have me arrested. For tossing dead animals he left in mom's freezer for 6 months.

Keep in mind he is relying on me for free pet care. I feed and walk his his dog, 2-3 times a day, 5 days a weeks. Does anyone know what petsitters charge?

TL;DR: My brother is even crazier than I thought he was. And him being a lawyer, and all, SMH

edit: Thinking about this, I see where I went wrong. I was so intent on being 'right', I didn't leave him a graceful way 'out'. No one likes an ultimatum, esp out of left field. I should have worked up to it; asked first, instead of demanded.

I'm looking at this from a purely 'relationships' POV. I know some here think I'm a wuss for tolerating his poo poo, but I'm going to be dealing with him for as long as my mom is alive, and after. He absolutely can't stand that that I'm my mom's executor and first trustee, have POA, etc. (even though he wasn't around when mom broke her hip, shoulder, both her wrists - I don't have to tell you what a person with two broken wrists can't do for themselves?) I think he came to see her once, in the rehab.

But yeah, he's the lawyer, and only son. I'm just a girl. Good enough to wipe mom's rear end and make her dinner, but not to be trusted with legal documents (we did have a good lawyer to draw up those papers). I think it makes him crazy that mom gave the job to me, and not him (truthfully, I don't think she quite trusts his wife).

It might be a bit of social engineering, but I think if I had approached him differently, I could have made him think that getting rid of the animals was his idea. Oh well, live and learn.

edit: I spoke to animal control, I AM allowed to to put them in the trash. I'm not quite allowed to bury them, but no one has has ever been prosecuted for for burying a pet in their own backyard. It's not something they would pursue.

edit: I spoke to the police. He also seemed to think that no one in history of mankind has ever been prosecuted for disposing of dead pet remains, but suggested I call a lawyer.

edit: called my mom's lawyer, everyone was at lunch. This is getting ridiculous.

One last edit: My brother didn't bring his dog over for me to take care of, this morning. Could it be that he is realizing that actions have consequences?

# ? Apr 8, 2018 14:56

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Palpek posted:

Is my girlfriend losing interest

lol

# ? Apr 8, 2018 15:07

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

How can you write that way in your 50s.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 15:12

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

Have you seen the internet lately? All the kids can type well and all the old people type like children did ten years ago

# ? Apr 8, 2018 15:26

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Have you seen the internet lately? All the kids can type well and all the old people type like children did ten years ago

I know, it's kind of shocking and funny. The olds wanted respect but in the internet age it's harder for them to hide that they're barely literate.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 15:28

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 14, 2024 09:34

Salty Josh: Jul 13, 2016; Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I feel like I can't take it, and my heart is just going to cave in.; Nap Ghost

Ghost Leviathan posted:

Have you seen the internet lately? All the kids can type well and all the old people type like children did ten years ago

I had one of those WTF moments when my 80+ year old grandfather texted me a "lol" followed by a "roflmao"

Blew my mind.

# ? Apr 8, 2018 15:39

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

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