/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »

welcome: Jun 28, 2002; rail slut

Runcible Cat posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3792330&pagenumber=3170&perpage=40#post485913769

God bless.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 00:08

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 6, 2024 00:07

A Pack of Kobolds: Mar 23, 2007

monkeytennis posted:

Nice. �Last week she ended up on a binge, she got off her tits and showed the bouncers her minge� is art.

The Queen's English truly is poetry.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 00:26

Bananaquiter: Aug 20, 2008; Ron's not here.

christmas boots posted:

Anna Faris tried to keep Chris Pratt during their marriage.

Not like in an abusive way, she just got kinda bummed when he got ripped.

I mean he did almost immediately cheat on and divorce her afterwards so...

All the while posting wholesome religious social media posts.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 00:54

Danaru: Jun 5, 2012; 何 ??

Bananaquiter posted:

I mean he did almost immediately cheat on and divorce her afterwards so...

All the while posting wholesome religious social media posts.

Oh man I remember it getting revealed that his church was crazy homophobic, and his response was like "as a straight rich white man I dont see any bigotry so obviously there is none 😌" lol what a piece of poo poo

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:03

Pinecone Sample: Oct 12, 2010; THIS ACCOUNT HAS BEEN SEIZED
by the United States Federal Bureau of Investigation in accordance with a seizure warrant issued pursuant to 69 U.S.C Sec. 420

Part 2 in a trilogy

Update: My husband (M29) is tracking my (F28) location via the Snapchat app he thinks without my knowledge.

quote:

So I posted about this 13 days ago but so much has changed since then so I decided to make a new post with the updates.

First, a little background: My husband and I are newlyweds, we have been married for a few months, however, we dated for 4 years before we did get married. No kids, it is just the two of us for now. For my work, I fill the same position in the company for two different locations that I split my work week between them. One of the locations is in the same town as us and the other is about 45 minutes to an hour away from our home depending on traffic. On occasion for my work, I will sometimes need to take packages to be shipped to customers, sometimes if I have small parts and the customer is not too far out of my way I will run parts to them on my way home. And today I even ran a couple of deliveries with my Warehouse Manager because we were short staffed. So I am not always sitting in my office while I am at work. I have been cheated on by a couple of longtime partners and because of this, I have taken a hard stand on cheating. I find it to be unacceptable human behavior, and I don't know how someone can do it to someone that they really love. I know all too well the emotional toll being cheated on takes on someone and I have vowed to never put someone through that EVER! My husband has absolutely snooped through my phone email etc. I don't really care, and the things that he does find when he snoops through my phone while I am sleeping is just dumb and not something I think is worth fighting over or spending any amount of energy on. Example: Once he wanted to fight because he looked through text messages that I sent back and forth to my friends and he saw that I texted them a swear word...I kid you not. I don't even remember the word but it wasn't the F-bomb or anything like that and it was only once. (He NEVER swears and I used to have a sailor's mouth but I got older and cleaned up my language) But this behavior is exhausting. I feel like I have to walk on eggshells and be super careful with what I do or say, even when he is not around.

So into the issue I need relationship advice about. My husband has gone into my phone (I'm honestly, still not sure when he did it) and change the settings in my Snapchat app so Snapchat will share my location with only him. At first, I thought of the possibility that I accidentally shared it with him myself, but I have ruled that out and you will see why. I noticed that my location was being shared with him and I decided to go ahead and let him continue to track me to see what happens. He has been tracking me for at least two weeks now. It started slow, I would notice that he would start calling me on days that I was working at the location that is out of town around 5-6 when I usually leave work, to check on where I am. He would say that he is wondering where I am to see if I am near any food places that he would like me to stop by to get us some dinner (not totally out of the normal, I probably wouldn't have even thought twice about it if I didn't know that he shared my location with himself, but it is outside of our normal routine as I usually will cook for him.) I figure what he is doing to comparing the location I am telling him I am at with where Snapchat says I'm at. But the other day the tracking started getting more...extreme. I started to figure out exactly how the location sharing works on the app, it will only update your location when you actually open the app. Otherwise, if you haven't opened the app it will give your location with a time stamp. For example, I could log into Snapchat at my work drive home and as long as I don't open the app it will say that I am at work while I am sitting on the sofa at home. Snapchat will also track your location pretty much dead on to the street that you are on. I suspect that my husband has figured this out also because his latest thing is to send me Snapchats around 4-6 so that I will open the app and update my location, sometimes he will follow this up with a call wondering where I am. 2 days ago we go through our normal routine, he is sending snaps calling me asking where I am and I let him know that I am leaving work but I had some things that I had to stop and ship of and I had something that I needed to run to a customer's home. And the strangest thing up to this point I was tried and in bed listening to an Audible book while I fall asleep. He was still up and at em and at his computer desk in our room doing how knows. Suddenly, he becomes very concerned with my phone having too many apps open and it was "wasting my data" and I needed to close all my open apps, right now! Well, I was tired and slightly confused but I shoed him off and told him I was almost asleep and didn't care about how many apps were open at the moment. Even though I was tired and delirious I took a mental note of this and took a careful look at the apps that were open in the home page on my phone. This used to be a way I would notice when he snooped through my phone. I would go to bed and then have random apps that I didn't use the previous day open on my phone...He must be wise to this trick now.

** On a side note if anyone has a way to see if someone has snooped on my phone I am open ears. I already checked to see if my phone has a feature where it will take a picture of however unlocked your phone but it doesn't -Thanks in advance Reddit!**

When I get home I am confronted with a Myriad of questions. Where did the customer live? Was their house really nice? etc. (again this would not have set off any alarms for me if I didn't already know that he was tracking my location)

Now, this next part isn't my proudest moment, but it had to be done to further my investigation. I grabbed his phone to see what I could see...Wasn't sure what I would find but I hardly had to snoop at all to find what I needed. In his open apps on the home page is google maps open with the street that my customer's house was on. He must have gone into street view and checked out the neighborhood. This confirms that he did share my location with himself and is very much tracking me...down to even checking out the surrounding areas of where I was.

Now that I figured out he is definitely tracking me what I can't figure out is why. I truly don't know why he would suspect me of cheating. In the original thread some of the comments (and myself) suspected this to be projecting . He is doing something shady, so he is now worried and checking in to see or even trying to catch me being shady. Some comments and even I thought that maybe he is tracking to see my location to see if he has time to do something shady. But now I am not sure. The behavior really seems like he might be trying to catch me cheat or something? (GOOD LUCK!)
What do you fine people of Reddit think?

His Birthday is coming up this week so I really don't plan on confronting him about it till afterword. In the meantime I am still paying attention to any changes or strange behavior.

When I confront him I plan on letting him know that I know that he has been tracking my location and I know that he has been doing it for weeks now. I plan on asking him why and why he does not trust me. I am also curious to know what he thought he was going to find...Any advice on how or the best way to confront him is. I've never really been in this situation before.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:12

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

chitoryu12 posted:

I [24M] am confused about my girlfriend's [28F] actions every now and then.

This one stings a bit but it comes down to the fact that they have different levels of emotional investment in the relationship.

It is weird she didn�t invite him to the birthday thing and it�s weird she hasn�t introduced him to her friends.

It sounds like he�s written a lot of the red flags off as her being from a different country but that doesn�t change the fact that she�s just not that into him.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:16

Batterypowered7: Aug 8, 2009; The mist that chills you keeps me warm.

Danaru posted:

Oh man I remember it getting revealed that his church was crazy homophobic, and his response was like "as a straight rich white man I dont see any bigotry so obviously there is none 😌" lol what a piece of poo poo

But his REAL crime is what Star-Lord did near the end of Avengers: Infinity War, amirite?

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:31

blugu64: Jul 17, 2006; Do you realize that fluoridation is the most monstrously conceived and dangerous communist plot we have ever had to face?

Pinecone Sample posted:

Part 2 in a trilogy

Update: My husband (M29) is tracking my (F28) location via the Snapchat app he thinks without my knowledge.

Root the phone, add a GPS/location spoofer. The snaps chats will be coming from inside the house and he�ll be looking all over for you!

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:33

PetraCore: Jul 20, 2017; 👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

He's cheating on her and projecting hard, I bet.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:37

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

Cheating and projecting seems likely, but even if he isn't, he sounds loving exhausting to be married to

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:39

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

Just leave the location enabled but stay at the divorce lawyers office all day.

He should eventually figure it out when he gets the papers.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 01:46

Beachcomber: May 21, 2007; Another day in paradise.; Slippery Tilde

Can we get the tag for the thread switched back to pink? It doesn't look right.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:05

LadyPictureShow: Nov 18, 2005; Success!

Beachcomber posted:

Can we get the tag for the thread switched back to pink? It doesn't look right.

Earlier today I thought the thread was gone because the tag changed and I'm used to just looking for the old pink tag.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:09

MarcusSA: Sep 23, 2007

LadyPictureShow posted:

Earlier today I thought the thread was gone because the tag changed and I'm used to just looking for the old pink tag.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:21

Xik: Mar 10, 2011; Dinosaur Gum

Antivehicular posted:

Cheating and projecting seems likely, but even if he isn't, he sounds loving exhausting to be married to

Even taking the most generous stance and believe nothing is going on except that he is incredibly insecure, it's just absolutely loving exhausting. Coming home from work every day to an interview of where you've been. Having all your conversations with other people monitored... gently caress all of that.

Also same re looking for pink icon, I'm too old for change and it's scary.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:26

HazCat: May 4, 2009

I don't get 'is cheating and projecting' vibes from that guy. I get 'absurdly controlling, sees her as a possession, and will probably get violent if confronted with the possibility of her leaving him' vibes.

'Cheating and projecting' is for stuff like the guy who picks passive-aggressive fights about you 'flirting with the waiter' every time you eat out, or the girl who doesn't want you to hang out with other women because she 'trusts you, but not them'.

The guy in this story isn't accusing her of anything. He's just covertly tracking her every move, and asking her prying questions to try to get even more information. He's not acting guilty, he's acting crazy.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:29

Xik: Mar 10, 2011; Dinosaur Gum

Totally acting crazy and controlling but

quote:

The guy in this story isn't accusing her of anything.

It's probably just a matter of time. Like, trying to catch her out with some inconsequential detail.

Oh you said there was a Wendy's near by when I asked you about food but the location you were at was actually 7.5km away from one, where were you actually!??!! Were you with someone else etc.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:35

Anne Whateley: Feb 11, 2007; i like nice words

Yeah that's bonkers and abusive and it's only gonna get worse

All these "so, I'm being abused" stories are really depressing to see posted here every day

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:53

HazCat: May 4, 2009

Yeah I don't think it will develop that way, or if it does it still won't be the same as when cheating partners project.

If a friend of mine told me their partner was accusing them of cheating, I'd tell them it's probably projection and they should break up (or at least prepare themselves to find out that their partner is actually cheating on them).

If a friend of mine told me the story posted here, I'd tell them to start putting together an escape plan (where to go immediately after leaving, a place to stay short term while finding a new place to live, packed emergency bag, etc), and to absolutely not confront her partner unless she had someone on hand to intervene if he got violent.

This level of a need for control is a really huge warning sign for domestic violence. Like, there are red flags and then there are :siren:

# ? Jun 15, 2019 02:54

Leon Einstein: Feb 6, 2012; I must win every thread in GBS. I don't care how much banal semantic quibbling and shitty posts it takes.

Yeah, that dude is insane. Sleeping With the Enemy type poo poo.

It seems like it would be a huge job to constantly worry about trying to catch your partner in a lie. Not a fun way to live. She needs to run.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:11

Piell: Sep 3, 2006; Grey Worm's Ken doll-like groin throbbed with the anticipatory pleasure that only a slightly warm and moist piece of lemoncake could offer; Young Orc

AITA for asking my boyfriend if he did something sexual with our dog after finding some weird stuff in his browsing history?

quote:

Obviously this is an odd situation so I need to provide a little context.

My boyfriend and I are both grad students. We have shared an apartment for the past two years and we adopted a beagle mix about a year ago.

My laptop has been unusable for the past few weeks since I spilled water on it, so we have been sharing my boyfriend’s temporarily. I often review my browsing history when writing papers because I need to track my sources and I usually forget to save the links. It became obvious to me that my boyfriend clears his browsing history after he uses the laptop. I didn’t really care because I figured he was just watching porn and felt a little awkward about the possibility that his girlfriend might see that.

But the other day, I guess he forgot to clear it. When I went to track down an article I had read, I noticed several links to some very strange erotica sites. It’s basically stories and realistic illustrations involving animal/human sex. There were probably thousands of them. It was extremely graphic and, obviously, I was shocked and mortified. I always considered myself to be pretty open minded but it was too much even for me.

I also started to wonder if my boyfriend had ever acted out any of the stuff I was seeing. I have noticed that my boyfriend is more affectionate with my dog than I’m used to. For example, he always thinks it’s funny to “make out” with him (like having our dog lick inside his mouth basically). I don’t really like it but I never thought anything dark until now.

Anyway when he finally got home I asked him about the websites. Surprisingly, after getting a little defensive, he admitted he visited those sites and said he didn’t see why I cared so much about it. I don’t know what came over me but for some reason his calmness just angered me. I snapped that I cared because I was afraid he’d done something to dog when I wasn’t around. That’s when he finally got angry too and we argued for a while. Long story short he is now staying in a motel.
I don’t know. I feel like maybe I crossed a line with my comment about our dog. But I also feel like I have a right to ask if I’m concerned?
Idk I’m just conflicted and feeling like maybe I was the judgmental rear end in a top hat in this scenario. Just want some neutral opinions.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:24

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Piell posted:

AITA for asking my boyfriend if he did something sexual with our dog after finding some weird stuff in his browsing history?

I haven�t checked in this thread for a few days and this was the latest post...

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:26

PetraCore: Jul 20, 2017; 👁️🔥👁️👁️👁️BE NOT👄AFRAID👁️👁️👁️🔥👁️

HazCat posted:

I don't get 'is cheating and projecting' vibes from that guy. I get 'absurdly controlling, sees her as a possession, and will probably get violent if confronted with the possibility of her leaving him' vibes.

'Cheating and projecting' is for stuff like the guy who picks passive-aggressive fights about you 'flirting with the waiter' every time you eat out, or the girl who doesn't want you to hang out with other women because she 'trusts you, but not them'.

The guy in this story isn't accusing her of anything. He's just covertly tracking her every move, and asking her prying questions to try to get even more information. He's not acting guilty, he's acting crazy.

I mean it doesn't matter if he's cheating and projecting because he's stalking his own wife in a severely scary way that's escalating.

I just think lovely people tend to also be hypocrites.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:30

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

It's like Lolita but the main character is dating Shaggy to get with Scooby. Rorita.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:30

FactsAreUseless: Feb 16, 2011

Burt Sexual posted:

I haven�t checked in this thread for a few days and this was the latest post...

'Ave a wank and calm down a bit, innit?

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:34

Cactus Ghost: Dec 20, 2003; you can actually inflate your scrote pretty safely with sterile saline, syringes, needles, and aseptic technique. its a niche kink iirc

the saline just slowly gets absorbed into your blood but in the meantime you got a big round smooth distended nutsack

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for sending my entire class an email telling them to not be so small minded, rustic and to expand their thinking?

Basically I'm 16 years old and I've lived in the same small town that's sort of like a mix between commuter and farm town for my entire life and with a few exceptions I've gone to school with the same kids since I was in kindergarten. We were all friends pretty much or at least friendly until about last year when I went to stay with my cousin in West New York for a summer and it totally expanded my mind. I got into really obscure anime, David Lynch movies and bands like Pearl Jam and Mother Love Bone, Indigo Girls and Sam Cooke. I came back to my home town thinking people would think it was cool and what not to learn new things but I was pretty much shunned me the entire year. Do you know how lame it is to go from walking around the MET and going to art house theaters every single day to coming back to find out your class mates are dabbing and talking poo poo about each other on Instagram and snap?

I pretty much kept to myself for the entire year but I got a "joke" invite to a guy's graduation party that I'd been friends with since he was like 5 and I was 3. I know it was a joke because he put on the title "I know you're not like the "other girls"..." yeah loving so funny rear end in a top hat.

So that kind of made me snap. So I gathered up all my classmates email addresses and a few of the people I used to be close to in the senior class that just graduated and basically told them how lame I thought they all are and how most of them will never know anything besides our hometown and they will likely marry the people they are dating now and just continue this toxic cycle. I told them to open their minds and try to take a road trip this summer and watch new movies and get off social media and like at least meet other people. Like who really cares if our city might go the little league world series again? There is so much more out there.

Well everyone is seriously making fun of me now and some people outright hate me. Was I the rear end in a top hat for doing this email?

from way back but i gotta say

this kid fuckin rules

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:42

QuarkJets: Sep 8, 2008

MarcusSA posted:

Just leave the location enabled but stay at the divorce lawyers office all day.

He should eventually figure it out when he gets the papers.

I was about to post this, you're pretty smart and cool :coolfish:

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:43

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Piell posted:

AITA for asking my boyfriend if he did something sexual with our dog after finding some weird stuff in his browsing history?

I�d rather be a judgmental bitch than a person that needs to crowdsource whether or not to date a dog fucker, aspirational or otherwise.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 03:59

Ghost Leviathan: Mar 2, 2017; Exploration is ill-advised.

HIJK posted:

come on now enjoy the exhibitionist thrill of your bitter and vengeful ex sending your boss your nudes

What does your boss do if it turns out you have a huge dick

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:12

MAKE NO BABBYS: Jan 28, 2010

Giant_Pupils posted:

Paying for your own background check and providing references are SOP. That's not unreasonable at all. Most apartment/rental communities that I have encountered do the same. I'd be afraid to sneeze in that place though. It looks like some sort of weird hipster museum.

uh, no they are not and they are expressly illegal in many municipalities, namely the ones with any sort of decency.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:13

Taima: Dec 31, 2006; tfw you're peeing next to someone in the lineup and they don't know

PetraCore posted:

I mean it doesn't matter if he's cheating and projecting because he's stalking his own wife in a severely scary way that's escalating.

I just think lovely people tend to also be hypocrites.

I think tracking of any kind is possessive and weird. Many of my friends track their partners, though it's hard to tell if it's really that common or if my friends are just like that.They have the "find my friend" thing on their phone so you can always see where the other person is, so it's not one sided or anything, but ugh.

That just seems so loving weird to me. I will never ask my fiance for her tracking data and won't give her mine either (not that she has ever asked).

Trust who you're with, or don't. Jeez. If someone is going to cheat they will. If anything, the earlier that happens the better off you are because you can drop them sooner. Trying to catch it in real time doesn't solve anything, because people are generally not smart enough to keep up the lie for long in most cases.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:15

Sagebrush: Feb 26, 2012; ERM... Actually I have stellar scores on the surveys, and every year students tell me that my classes are the best ones they’ve ever taken.

Piell posted:

AITA for asking my boyfriend if he did something sexual with our dog after finding some weird stuff in his browsing history?

quote:
I have noticed that my boyfriend is more affectionate with my dog than I�m used to. For example, he always thinks it�s funny to �make out� with him (like having our dog lick inside his mouth basically). I don�t really like it but I never thought anything dark until now

that is revolting and you should have broken up with him the second he did that. holy hell

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:38

ClamdestineBoyster: Aug 15, 2015; Can't post for 10 years!

OMGVBFLOL posted:

from way back but i gotta say

this kid fuckin rules

Yeah making fun of someone on some super impersonal level is p lovely. It�s not like an inclusive sort of thing where you even feel motivated to make fun of something about them back. Especially if the joke is like �hurr durrr you look dumb duurrrrrr� :words:

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:42

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Taima posted:

I think tracking of any kind is possessive and weird. Many of my friends track their partners, though it's hard to tell if it's really that common or if my friends are just like that.They have the "find my friend" thing on their phone so you can always see where the other person is, so it's not one sided or anything, but ugh.

That just seems so loving weird to me. I will never ask my fiance for her tracking data and won't give her mine either (not that she has ever asked).

Trust who you're with, or don't. Jeez. If someone is going to cheat they will. If anything, the earlier that happens the better off you are because you can drop them sooner. Trying to catch it in real time doesn't solve anything, because people are generally not smart enough to keep up the lie for long in most cases.

My wife and I share locations on our phones to make pick up/drop offs easier. It�s not weird at all.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:44

Peaceful Anarchy: Sep 18, 2005; sXe
I am the math man.

Sharing locations is like sharing passwords or bank accounts or anything else of a personal nature. If it's an expected step in a relationship to create or maintain trust then it's creepy and controlling, but if it happens organically because you already trust each other and it makes daily life more convenient then it's not a big deal.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:53

coolskull: Nov 11, 2007

OMGVBFLOL posted:

from way back but i gotta say

this kid fuckin rules

i imagine one future, where they realize they're an rear end in a top hat, and make honest efforts to both treat people well and learn more about the world

and another future where this shame, unexamined, turns into an interminable performance at a failing cafe.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:53

Xik: Mar 10, 2011; Dinosaur Gum

Piell posted:

AITA for asking my boyfriend if he did something sexual with our dog after finding some weird stuff in his browsing history?

and straight to hell with the boyfriend, thanks.

Taima posted:

I think tracking of any kind is possessive and weird.

I don't think it's weird if both people are doing it in good faith and have a healthy relationship. Like, if you frequently pick each other up or as an emergency or something. My wife and I don't share right now but if we had kids and had crazy schedules with one car or something I could see it being helpful.

# ? Jun 15, 2019 04:59

nankeen: Mar 20, 2019; by Cyrano4747

Leon Einstein posted:

He can't go to sleep earlier; he stays up playing Anthem and looking at porn.

For real.

i immediately parsed this as meaning the leonard cohen song and was like "oh, that's nice"

# ? Jun 15, 2019 05:00

Odd: Dec 30, 2006; I think everybody just needs to maybe cool out a little maybe

Burt Sexual posted:

My wife and I share locations on our phones to make pick up/drop offs easier. It�s not weird at all.

I also track your location

# ? Jun 15, 2019 05:03

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 6, 2024 00:07

Burt Sexual: Jan 26, 2006; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS; Switchblade Switcharoo

Xik posted:

and straight to hell with the boyfriend, thanks.

I don't think it's weird if both people are doing it in good faith and have a healthy relationship. Like, if you frequently pick each other up or as an emergency or something. My wife and I don't share right now but if we had kids and had crazy schedules with one car or something I could see it being helpful.

We have 4 cars, 2 kids. She picks me up from work/the pub, I pick kids up from practice sometimes which rotates locations, she�s bring dinner take out home (don�t txt and drive!). Just a few

# ? Jun 15, 2019 05:04

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »