/r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

this is the best sitcom pitch I've ever heard

I know a guy [23M] who is going to run off on his pregnant girlfriend [20F]. Should I tell her? Catch: They're both crazy.

how, how, HOW could one possibly prevent a felon running from parole from abandoning their family and leaving the state. HOW.

yeah yeah i know i'm usually 100% anti prisons but gently caress it, this is hellworld, i want that piece of poo poo cutting Hillary Clinton's mansion-yard.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:14

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 14:11

DandyLion: Jun 24, 2010; disrespectul Deciever

Best Bi Geek Squid posted:

/r/relationships: come for the most vitriolic, lovely derails on the forums

My girlfriend's appearance is coincidentally reminding me of my mother. Anything I can do?

what a bizzare and inexplicable coincidence that i am dating someone who looks just like my mom

He should just tell her.

Problem solved.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:14

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

this is the best sitcom pitch I've ever heard

I know a guy [23M] who is going to run off on his pregnant girlfriend [20F]. Should I tell her? Catch: They're both crazy.

Wait until you move out, then tell her.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:15

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

dudeness posted:

This is kinda an extreme solution, but you're gonna have to claw your eyes out.

Self-diagnosed early so he can have them surgically removed with anesthesia.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:18

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

I need to know if the pizzas are being cooked indoors or outdoors to judge that one. Beans don't burn on the grill.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:23

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA for putting my foot down with my husband's ridiculous baby names?

I question literally everything about you due to this post. What in the gently caress could you have possibly seen in this guy? Is he funny? Smart? Rich? Hot? No. None of that. Were you kidnapped? Were you sold off as a child bride? What in god's name could have drawn you to this sack of rotting pig poo poo? God drat, I hope you find yourself soon and :sever:

from this dumbfuck immediately.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:24

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

My Partner (M31) Locked Me (F26) Out

quote:

TLDR: I go out for the night and boyfriend locks the door when I'm not home, bolting it so I can't get in.

My boyfriend and I have been doing long distance while I am in school. I have come back for the summer and arrived a few days ago. Last night, I had agreed to meet a friend late because her family is in town and they are leaving tomorrow. I really wanted to meet them and my boyfriend was invited. He needed to be in bed early for work. Before I leave we start having a difficult discussion about how long distance has impacted us, how we should continue the relationship going forward, etc. Before going out, my boyfriend said, "please don't drink too much so we can continue our conversation when you get back." We didn't agree on a time I should be home to do so. Last night I left just before 10, had to wait because my friend and her family were lost, etc. Long story short, I text him at one letting him know I was in a cab on my way home. He told me not to bother and that he'd bolted the door. That I could sleep somewhere else and return for my stuff tomorrow.

I was shocked. His last text was sent when I arrived to the apartment. I told him he wasn't asleep so he could let me in, went upstairs, and my keys couldn't get past the second lock because of the bolt. I call him twice and he denies the call. As I am heading downstairs, I hear him re-lock the first lock. I try to unlock it again, nada. Just as I am going downstairs to find a friend to stay with he opens the door. He lets me in, tells me I am treating the apartment (that we lived in together for a year and a half) like a hotel. That I am not welcome, and that he doesn't want to talk. He hands me a pillow. I ask him if I should sleep on the couch or leave. He says he doesn't care.

I crashed on the couch and felt completely destroyed. My friend was angry that he had locked me out. This morning he got ready and didn't say a word to me. We have agreed to talk after work. I really don't know if this is the end. Was I in the wrong for going to meet my friend and her family? Is this fixable or is he being abusive and I should book a flight back to where I came from?

Edit: (A little more context for those that want to know) I was not "intoxicated" when I returned. I had 2 beers and came home. I do have a friend who lives around the corner, but due to the late hour I was concerned they wouldn't be awake. I do still have my apartment in the other city.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:25

Best Bi Geek Squid: Mar 25, 2016

i dated a girl for a while who had blonde hair and a particular haircut. we also had a very good sex life and liked (very tame) bdsm stuff. I had never really given that a shot but found it hot that she was into me being dominant etc.

after we broke up, i would not-infrequently see women with similar hair cuts in public. I would be attracted to them, but then realize that they were all older women. then, one day, the following thoughts hit me in rapid succession:

1. oh, it's an older lady haircut
2. my mom has that haircut
3. my mom had blonde hair too
4. well I couldn't have been attracted to that girl just because she looked like my mom. In fact, a big part of our sexual attraction came because i enjoyed domina...

5. oh no

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:25

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

Convicted felon parole evader dad is probably doing his girlfriend and his future offspring a favor by leaving.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:25

Pick: Jul 19, 2009; Nap Ghost

Best Bi Geek Squid posted:

i dated a girl for a while who had blonde hair and a particular haircut. we also had a very good sex life and liked (very tame) bdsm stuff. I had never really given that a shot but found it hot that she was into me being dominant etc.

after we broke up, i would not-infrequently see women with similar hair cuts in public. I would be attracted to them, but then realize that they were all older women. then, one day, the following thoughts hit me in rapid succession:

1. oh, it's an older lady haircut
2. my mom has that haircut
3. my mom had blonde hair too
4. well I couldn't have been attracted to that girl just because she looked like my mom. In fact, a big part of our sexual attraction came because i enjoyed domina...

5. oh no

Uhhhhhhh

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:27

Dazerbeams: Jul 8, 2009

SA has always been a content generator.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:28

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

My (18M) parents dislike my SO (19F) for being "under my league" and having sex with me, and I don't know what to do.

quote:

Alright so, I've been dating my SO for about six months now. Right now the relationship is really serious. We clicked really early on and fell for each other quickly. Since everything was starting out great between us, I had her meet my parents about 2 months in. My parents told me they liked her and were glad I met her. They felt she was 'genuine' and 'friendly.'

A little background, my mother is super Christian, and a couple weeks after meeting my SO, my mother flat out asked me if we were having sex. When I told her yes, she got extremely angry and gave me the whole "I've never been so disappointed in my life" talk. During the conversation, my mom was using words like 'slut' to describe my SO. She then told me that the next time she sees my SO, she will basically tell her to stop having sex with me. I was really upset that my mom had gone from really liking my SO to basically hating her in 10min. Now for the kicker.

About a week after the confrontation with my mom, both my parents sat me down talked about my SO. I guess I'm fairly attractive since I have had pretty good luck with girls over the years. My dad opened the conversation up by talking about 'dating leagues.' He basically said she wasn't in my league and I could do better, and hinted that we should break up. The reason my dad probably said this is because my SO is part Japanese, and my dad said, a while back, that he never saw asain people as being that attractive. Mind you my parents and SO have only met once for about 2hrs at dinner.

So atm, my parents opinion on my girlfriend are in the dumpster. I have not brought my girlfriend to see my parents since the confrontation because I fear they will low-key insult her, or my mom will yell at her about the whole sex deal.

My girlfriend always asks when we are doing stuff near my place. I prefer not to tell her the real reason I dont want her over, so I just say there's more stuff to do by her, which is completely true. My SO has really bad anxiety and I feel telling her my parents think I should break up with her will cause her to have even worse anxiety. My solution to this problem, which is really bad, is to just never bring her over again. I am transfering to my four-year university next year which is really close to my girlfriends university, so my parents will be out of the picture.

I never thought the girl I would fall in love with would be disliked by my parents. Really, I just want to know a better solution to this problem. If there are any details you want to know, feel free to ask. Sorry for any grammar errors, on mobile.

TLDR: Title

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:29

cumshitter: Sep 27, 2005; by Fluffdaddy

Dixie Cretin Seaman posted:

You can see balls too? What's your effective radius of visualization around the peen? Imagine all the prostate, throat, and cervical cancers you could screen with your gift.

All parts of the male sexual organs, including the sphincter and rectum. Approximately 1" in every direction.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:31

duck trucker: Oct 14, 2017; YOSPOS

Fight guy should try to get a job as a training dummy for a women's self defense course cause he's clearly overqualified for it.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:34

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

How can I sleep? [29M] with [26F] wife

quote:

If I slept according to my natural time, it would be 9am to 5pm. Problem is, those are my work hours.

I figured out a routine that works for me - as long as I have quiet between 9pm and 10:30pm, I can eventually coax sleep out of my brain, whether that be by autohypnosis or simple dissociation via reddit. I'm sure if I can ever have a couple weeks of doing this, I could form the habit and my sleep issues would be solved.

It must be over a year ago now, when I asked wife to be quiet during this time. She plays an online game with friends over voicechat almost every night, until about 1am. When coming to bed, she will bang her foot on the bed, say "ow!", and then sit up in bed for a while before sleeping. Wakes me up all the time. I've tried moving the garbage out of her expected path but she puts it back.

Sleeping together is important to her, so I requested that we set a bedtime. Be in bed at 10pm. Very clear. In response, she will *start* her bedtime routine at 10pm, which takes at least 30 minutes and can sometimes take over an hour. How long does it take to use the bathroom and brush your teeth? Can't start my sleep efforts until it's over, since she *must* say "good night, I love you" and kiss me on the cheek prior to her sleeping. A response is expected, otherwise a fight starts. This breaks concentration, and it will take around 2 hours for me to sleep after this.

We're now sleeping separately. She has an air mattress next to the gaming computers.

I've put a couple doors between the bedroom and the gaming room. I thought this would be my solution because it does block all noise, but then she's coming into the bedroom at all hours looking for something she forgot in there, and then leaving the doors open when she gets back on voicechat.

The bathroom is right next to the bedroom, so the common sense thing (to me at least) is to try to keep it quiet, don't let the toilet lid fall by gravity etc., but it bothers me that I'm starting a fight over this since yet another aspect of "don't do things that would prevent me from sleeping" wasn't clear to her.

I expressed my wish to be guaranteed to be undisturbed during the night hours, but was prevented by not being able to lock the door which goes to the bathroom/bedroom. She suggested that a portable camping toilet could be used. This seems extreme, but it solves my problem! I put a lock on the door and gave her the key to use in emergencies.

Turns out the emergency was literally the first night I locked the door. She didn't feel like filling the camping toilet with water.

Can my situation be resolved? If she says she loves me, how can I get her to show it by letting me sleep? What else can I try to get some sleep on the regular? Obviously I'm hyper focused on the sleep issue, but is there a list of things that I can examine to determine if the rest of my relationship is even worth saving? We haven't had sex in 4 months or so, and we don't really hang out anymore either (the air mattress blocks my gaming computer). I feel I may be suffering from sunk cost fallacy. We're going to see a couple's counselor on Thursday just kidding she cancelled it and so I'm making this post instead.

TL;DR: Tried lots of things but wife doesn't respect my sleeping times. How can she be convinced?

Edit: Thanks for the responses everyone. There is much food for thought. I need to work, so I probably won't respond much after this.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:35

The Bramble: Mar 16, 2004

dudeness posted:

This is kinda an extreme solution, but you're gonna have to claw your eyes out.

The old ways are often best.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:36

Admiral Ray: May 17, 2014; Proud Musk and Dogecoin fanboy

chitoryu12 posted:

How can I sleep? [29M] with [26F] wife

Can my situation be resolved?

Yes, by getting a divorce and not marrying a goddamn gamer.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:39

therobit: Aug 19, 2008; I've been tryin' to speak with you for a long time

chitoryu12 posted:

How can I sleep? [29M] with [26F] wife

Sorry, you married a goon. Your life is over now.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:41

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

chitoryu12 posted:

How can I sleep? [29M] with [26F] wife

Jesus CHRIST, a camping toilet because you can�t stop gaming OR be quiet for like two hours a night? I am so enraged. I hate this person so much.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:41

Mr. Fall Down Terror: Jan 24, 2018; by Fluffdaddy

cant this guy just put a coffin full of earth in the crypt to sleep in or something

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:43

Inexplicable Humblebrag: Sep 20, 2003

e.. earplugs??

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:46

Dewgy: Nov 10, 2005; ~🚚special delivery~📦

MasBrillante posted:

Jesus CHRIST, a camping toilet because you can�t stop gaming OR be quiet for like two hours a night? I am so enraged. I hate this person so much.

I'm gonna have to admit, I'm less sympathetic to grandpa night owl over here. "I can only fall asleep within the hours of 9 and 10:30, and only if I am completely uninterrupted by another human being, and my wife MUST sleep next to me even though I go to bed more or less while the fuckin' sun is still out in the summer, and also i need a fresh glass of suudsu or it JUST WONT WORK".

Seriously, "we have to set a bedtime", "very clear"? This dude sounds fuckin' insufferable.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:48

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Dewgy posted:

I'm gonna have to admit, I'm less sympathetic to grandpa night owl over here. "I can only fall asleep within the hours of 9 and 10:30, and only if I am completely uninterrupted by another human being, and my wife MUST sleep next to me even though I go to bed more or less while the fuckin' sun is still out in the summer, and also i need a fresh glass of suudsu or it JUST WONT WORK".

Seriously, "we have to set a bedtime", "very clear"? This dude sounds fuckin' insufferable.

They both sound like people I would fantasize about strangling. Selfish, rude, loud and gross.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:50

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

Dewgy posted:

I'm gonna have to admit, I'm less sympathetic to grandpa night owl over here. "I can only fall asleep within the hours of 9 and 10:30, and only if I am completely uninterrupted by another human being, and my wife MUST sleep next to me even though I go to bed more or less while the fuckin' sun is still out in the summer, and also i need a fresh glass of suudsu or it JUST WONT WORK".

Seriously, "we have to set a bedtime", "very clear"? This dude sounds fuckin' insufferable.

He talks about it more in the thread, but his body is basically incapable of sleeping normally at the hour he needs to for work. It would be like asking you to go to bed in the middle of the day. He tried earplugs but found them too uncomfortable, and sleeping pills give him about 30 minutes to fall asleep before they wear off. He's got an actual problem.

What I think is going to happen is if he accepts the camp toilet suggestion, his wife is going to use that as a springboard into an argument later. "I sleep on a loving air mattress and poo poo next to my computer because you're so difficult!"

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:54

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

I told my (22f) coworker (mid 40s m) off for asking invasive questions, now he's playing "silent treatment"

quote:

I work with this guy I'll call Richard. He's a lot older than me and I'm pretty sure he's married but going through some midlife crisis. He had started to ask me really personal questions. Like if I have a boyfriend or girlfriend. Questions about my sexuality (I'm openly bi) and questions about my feelings on stuff. I tried to give as boring "blah" answers as I could for a while. He's only do that if he caught me alone.

I didn't go to HR because I've actually been to them about something way worse, with way more evidence, in the past, and they really just pushed that under the rug.

But two weeks ago,I snapped at Richard, and said "I'm sick of these weird questions. Going forwards, i don't want you saying anything that you wouldn't be saying in front of (manager) or you wouldn't be saying in front of (HR rep) or you wouldn't say in front of our whole team. If it's not something you want reaching their ears, you'd best not say it to me. Understand?"

I was basically trying to subtly threaten him that I'd tell people about what he was doing.

And since then, he's been really petty about it. Like if I ask him a work related question, he'd say that "oh i don't know if you'll be angry if I speak, I'll not say anything."

Or if i ask a group something, he absolutely never speaks.

Or if I ask when a late delivery is coming, he'd say "I wouldn't say that in front of the boss" and then just not answer

It's being a pain in my job, and I don't know what to do. I just want him to answer work things without being an rear end

tldr - Told a coworker off for asking invasive questions . Now he is playing some dumb silent treatment game that's affecting my work

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:55

Antivehicular: Dec 30, 2011; I wanna sing one for the cars
That are right now headed silent down the highway
And it's dark and there is nobody driving And something has got to give

How do you bang your foot on the same poo poo in the bedroom so often it's become a routine? Even if you insisted on leaving your stupid obstacle course bedroom intact, wouldn't you eventually develop some kind of mental map?

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:56

MLKQUOTEMACHINE: Oct 22, 2012; Some motherfuckers are always trying to ice-skate uphill

chitoryu12 posted:

Girlfriend wants to sleep with another guy, before we get engaged.

I'd have her send me her life savings, then dump her and sell all her stuff.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:59

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA - My daughter is replacing me with her half-sister.

I have always had trouble with my eldest daughter, "Alice". She was a difficult child, and is now a difficult adult of 22. She has a son of 18 months, Theo, and another baby on the way, she says by the same man. I have my doubts. Alice works in a call centre, and says she's management. I also doubt this. Alice is also living with her half-sister from my late husband's first marriage, and she is pushing me away, allowing her half-sister to replace me.

Sarah, (half-sister), is much older than Alice. My husband was a bit older than me, and I am only a few years older than Sarah. I won't go into the details of my husband's first marriage, but it was not a happy one, and when he divorced his first wife, Sarah took it very hard, and still bears a grudge against me to this day, despite the fact that my husband's ex wife died many years ago.

Growing up, Alice and Sarah didn't have much contact. Sarah distanced herself from my husband, and refused to be a part of his life. She didn't even meet Alice until she was a teenager. Alice has always fancied herself a martyr, and I have always been her favourite target for this. She makes up elaborate stories about her childhood, designed to make me look like a bad person.

Alice left home at 18. I always offered her a place in the family home, but she always refused, rudely. I recently found out that she is now living with Sarah and Sarah's husband, and is acting like they are her parents! She won't let me see Theo, but she is always rubbing it in my face how well Theo and Sarah get on. She posted a picture to facebook of Sarah and Theo with the caption "Theo and Yera (rhymes with Sarah)", which is far too close to a "granny" nickname for me. Sarah is NOT Theo's grandmother. I am. It will confuse him, and that's not fair.

I've tried speaking to Alice about it, but she is unreasonable. She just says that I wasn't much of a mother to her, and that Sarah is more supportive. She also threw it in my face that I don't get to see either of my eldest son's children, either. My son and I get along wonderfully, but the mothers of his children are odd, unpleasant girls, and won't let me have contact with my grandchildren unless I jump through their ridiculous hoops, which I refuse to do.

I told Alice that she was being ridiculous, and that she needs to grow up and treat me with respect, and come home immediately. I told Sarah that she was being immature as always, and that her past problems with me don't entitle her to drive a wedge between me and my daughter. Sarah just ignored me, but Alice became even more dramatic, and started putting even more pictures of Theo and Sarah on social media, which hurt me terribly.

So I have to ask, am I in the wrong? I am hurting so badly, and Alice doesn't seem to care. She can't seem to see that Sarah doesn't want her to be happy, she just wants me to be unhappy, and she doesn't notice that it's working.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:59

Rubellavator: Aug 16, 2007

duck trucker posted:

Fight guy should try to get a job as a training dummy for a women's self defense course cause he's clearly overqualified for it.

Nobody wants a training dummy that's just gonna ejaculate all over them

# ? Jul 9, 2019 21:59

chitoryu12: Apr 24, 2014

My (28F) Boyfriend (27m) who I've started living with won't get his Boiler Fixed and I'm not authorized to fill out the form, its free.

quote:

Started living with my boyfriend a month ago, it's great and I love it, but we've hit a bit of a rock. He has his own rented place, I pay him half the rent and help out with shopping, bills and stuff for the house. It's exactly 50/50. His landlord knows I'm living there and is fine with it (in fact he says the house has never looked cleaner lol.)

I went away last weekend with friends, (Thur until Saturday) and got back and the boiler wasn't working. We had no hot water at all. My boyfriend said it had been broken since Friday but he would sort it. Until then we had to have cold showers and boil the kettle for washes.

The cold showers are awful they're so freezing, and I get brain freeze after for ages. I hate it but I have to be clean especially for work. On Monday I asked if he had reported it, he said he'd phoned up but they need him to fill out a form which they've emailed to him. I asked if he wanted me to do it and he said no it has to be him - he's got this online account with the agency. It's all free for my BF as they send someone to fix it.

Come Wednesday I've just text and he still hasn't done it and I feel quite ill from the cold showers. He doesn't shower as much as he works as a mechanic, he showers every 3 days whereas I need to daily or I feel gross.

I don't want to have to keep nagging but I can't live without hot water. I kinda just wanted to rant more than anything as I know the only answer is to keep on at him. But do you think it's okay for any BF/GF to invite someone to live with them, then put off fixing the boiler, watching them struggle with freezing showers each day? Or am I over reacting?

Edit: Thanks for all the answers. He's going to do the form tonight and has offered to take me to my parents so I can have a bath. If nothing happens though I'm not going to drop it until it does. You're right I'm being too soft and putting his contentment before my own when it needs to be 50/50.

Edit: Thanks for the comments! He came home tonight with a bunch of tools and fixed it himself! Problem solved

Edit on the him not washing: He does wash for about half an hour after work, and has special stuff made from bath salts for his hands to remove grease/oil. He just doesn't go in the shower - because it's super loud and he worries about the neighbours, I personally don't give a poo poo it ain't my fault it's loud lol. We only have sex at weekends normally and he has a bath and does his nails first. But thank you for the concern, I definitely need to be more ballsy.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:00

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

Smirking_Serpent posted:

AITA - My daughter is replacing me with her half-sister.

I have always had trouble with my eldest daughter, "Alice". She was a difficult child, and is now a difficult adult of 22. She has a son of 18 months, Theo, and another baby on the way, she says by the same man. I have my doubts. Alice works in a call centre, and says she's management. I also doubt this. Alice is also living with her half-sister from my late husband's first marriage, and she is pushing me away, allowing her half-sister to replace me.

Sarah, (half-sister), is much older than Alice. My husband was a bit older than me, and I am only a few years older than Sarah. I won't go into the details of my husband's first marriage, but it was not a happy one, and when he divorced his first wife, Sarah took it very hard, and still bears a grudge against me to this day, despite the fact that my husband's ex wife died many years ago.

Growing up, Alice and Sarah didn't have much contact. Sarah distanced herself from my husband, and refused to be a part of his life. She didn't even meet Alice until she was a teenager. Alice has always fancied herself a martyr, and I have always been her favourite target for this. She makes up elaborate stories about her childhood, designed to make me look like a bad person.

Alice left home at 18. I always offered her a place in the family home, but she always refused, rudely. I recently found out that she is now living with Sarah and Sarah's husband, and is acting like they are her parents! She won't let me see Theo, but she is always rubbing it in my face how well Theo and Sarah get on. She posted a picture to facebook of Sarah and Theo with the caption "Theo and Yera (rhymes with Sarah)", which is far too close to a "granny" nickname for me. Sarah is NOT Theo's grandmother. I am. It will confuse him, and that's not fair.

I've tried speaking to Alice about it, but she is unreasonable. She just says that I wasn't much of a mother to her, and that Sarah is more supportive. She also threw it in my face that I don't get to see either of my eldest son's children, either. My son and I get along wonderfully, but the mothers of his children are odd, unpleasant girls, and won't let me have contact with my grandchildren unless I jump through their ridiculous hoops, which I refuse to do.

I told Alice that she was being ridiculous, and that she needs to grow up and treat me with respect, and come home immediately. I told Sarah that she was being immature as always, and that her past problems with me don't entitle her to drive a wedge between me and my daughter. Sarah just ignored me, but Alice became even more dramatic, and started putting even more pictures of Theo and Sarah on social media, which hurt me terribly.

So I have to ask, am I in the wrong? I am hurting so badly, and Alice doesn't seem to care. She can't seem to see that Sarah doesn't want her to be happy, she just wants me to be unhappy, and she doesn't notice that it's working.

This is so chock full of narcissist red flags, it�s hilarious. The first of them, and my favorite: �She was a difficult child.�

MasBrillante fucked around with this message at 22:07 on Jul 9, 2019

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:03

A Wizard of Goatse: Dec 14, 2014

Dewgy posted:

I'm gonna have to admit, I'm less sympathetic to grandpa night owl over here. "I can only fall asleep within the hours of 9 and 10:30, and only if I am completely uninterrupted by another human being, and my wife MUST sleep next to me even though I go to bed more or less while the fuckin' sun is still out in the summer, and also i need a fresh glass of suudsu or it JUST WONT WORK".

Seriously, "we have to set a bedtime", "very clear"? This dude sounds fuckin' insufferable.

lotta people have real sleep disorders or lovely work schedules outside their control that they basically have to accommodate or die of, he's a chump for going through all this rigamarole instead of just telling her they're not cosleeping but i fuckin challenge you to be this reasonable after your first week with four hours total of actual REM sleep

A Wizard of Goatse fucked around with this message at 22:07 on Jul 9, 2019

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:04

PHIZ KALIFA: Dec 21, 2011; #mood

MasBrillante posted:

This is so chock full of narcissist ref flags, it�s hilarious. The first of them, and my favorite: �She was a difficult child.�

i also caught:
- makes up stories about her childhood
- being replaced as parents
- being replaced by grandparents
- issues with other adult children mysteriously not explained.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:07

Rubellavator: Aug 16, 2007

Dewgy posted:

I'm gonna have to admit, I'm less sympathetic to grandpa night owl over here. "I can only fall asleep within the hours of 9 and 10:30, and only if I am completely uninterrupted by another human being, and my wife MUST sleep next to me even though I go to bed more or less while the fuckin' sun is still out in the summer, and also i need a fresh glass of suudsu or it JUST WONT WORK".

Seriously, "we have to set a bedtime", "very clear"? This dude sounds fuckin' insufferable.

Think you read part of that backwards. Shes the one who has to sleep next to him and has the kissing ritual.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:08

MasBrillante: Dec 3, 2005; by Jeffrey of YOSPOS

PHIZ KALIFA posted:

i also caught:
- makes up stories about her childhood
- being replaced as parents
- being replaced by grandparents
- issues with other adult children mysteriously not explained.

�she says by the same man�
nobody else has ever had a happy marriage ever
obsession with �rudeness�
the timeline from Fringe
I am HURTING no one hurts like ME

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:10

Midnight Voyager: Jul 2, 2008; Lipstick Apathy

Rubellavator posted:

Think you read part of that backwards. Shes the one who has to sleep next to him and has the kissing ritual.

And I HAVE TO RESPOND when she says good night even though she knows I am trying to sleep.

What an rear end in a top hat. HEY I KNOW YOU ARE TRYING TO SLEEP BUT YOU MUST SAY GOODNIGHT TO ME OR YOU DON'T LOVE ME

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:12

Dixie Cretin Seaman: Jan 22, 2008; all hat and one catte; Hot Rope Guy

Best Bi Geek Squid posted:

i dated a girl for a while who had blonde hair and a particular haircut. we also had a very good sex life and liked (very tame) bdsm stuff. I had never really given that a shot but found it hot that she was into me being dominant etc.

after we broke up, i would not-infrequently see women with similar hair cuts in public. I would be attracted to them, but then realize that they were all older women. then, one day, the following thoughts hit me in rapid succession:

1. oh, it's an older lady haircut
2. my mom has that haircut
3. my mom had blonde hair too
4. well I couldn't have been attracted to that girl just because she looked like my mom. In fact, a big part of our sexual attraction came because i enjoyed domina...

5. oh no

If your mom ever met your ex while you were dating, she knows, op. Better tell mom to keep her big mouth shut and don't take no for an answer.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:14

Dewgy: Nov 10, 2005; ~🚚special delivery~📦

chitoryu12 posted:

He talks about it more in the thread, but his body is basically incapable of sleeping normally at the hour he needs to for work. It would be like asking you to go to bed in the middle of the day. He tried earplugs but found them too uncomfortable, and sleeping pills give him about 30 minutes to fall asleep before they wear off. He's got an actual problem.

What I think is going to happen is if he accepts the camp toilet suggestion, his wife is going to use that as a springboard into an argument later. "I sleep on a loving air mattress and poo poo next to my computer because you're so difficult!"

Yeah but I mean, he also says he "naturally" sleeps from 9AM to 5PM, so that gives me some pause. I've been through four flipped schedules in six months and I get being hosed up by work, but this sounds suspiciously like blaming his wife for just trying to do things during normal (nerd) hours when (nerdy) people do things.

A Wizard of Goatse posted:

lotta people have real sleep disorders or lovely work schedules outside their control that they basically have to accommodate or die of, he's a chump for going through all this rigamarole instead of just telling her they're not cosleeping but i fuckin challenge you to be this reasonable after your first week with four hours total of actual REM sleep

Oh believe me I get that. Call center schedule shift changes suuuuuuuck. And they do so bi-annually.

Rubellavator posted:

Think you read part of that backwards. Shes the one who has to sleep next to him and has the kissing ritual.

Nah, I get it's her priority, but he was "very clear" that setting a dedicated bedtime like she's twelve is the way to make that work. There's probably more to the story but I feel like the one-sided perspective here is doing him no favors and every minor bit of it is phrased as totally her fault.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:15

Tetramin: Apr 1, 2006; I'ma buck you up.

MasBrillante posted:

This is so chock full of narcissist red flags, it�s hilarious. The first of them, and my favorite: �She was a difficult child.�

And that her son's baby mommas clearly despise her, and you know it's because shes a horrible person. The son probably hates her too but lets the ladies take the blame so he doesn't have to deal with her.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:18

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? Jun 12, 2024 14:11

Smirking_Serpent: Aug 27, 2009

AITA for thinking that a woman should take her husbands surname?

So I just got into an argument with my SO around the topic of changing names after marriage. Her argument was that it took her a while to accept her current last name so she wouldn�t want to give it up as she now sees it as part of her identity.

I think that the woman�s surname should change for these reasons: It symbolizes a new beginning and new chapter in both of their lives in which they will be in a partnership and grow together

Although you are legally changing your name it doesn�t erase your family ties or identity of your previous surname

When the time to have kids comes you become one family �unit� all sharing the same last name.

The argument got to the point where she was arguing that the kids should even have her last name or hyphenated names. This all just seemed very hypocritical to me given that one of the things she loves about her family is that they all share the same last name. AITA?

** Edit to clarify, I never insisted that she change hers. I let her know there�s nothing wrong with keeping hers but I have grown up around the idea and dream of giving my last name to someone�s daughter and building a family together. I am an only child with limited family whereas she has siblings and first cousins 30+.

# ? Jul 9, 2019 22:19

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > /r/relationships: Memento Mori Lasagna

«‹›6020 »