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zoux posted:God has a micropenis I think your reading of 'created man in His own image' is a bit too literal here.
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Aug 29, 2019 22:02
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I'm a donkey dicked horse cumming Egyptian my dude
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Aug 29, 2019 22:05
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Picnic Princess posted:That whale video makes me so mad because that would honestly be the absolute coolest and best thing to ever happen to me, they've been my favourite type of animal since I was a little kid and any time I ever see any species of cetacean I literally shake because I'm so excited and happy. I could die the next day and my life would have been fulfilled. If you ever get the opportunity to do a whale-watching trip, and you've got a strong stomach, do it in a Zodiac. Debrah can't complain to the police about the whales if she can't hold onto the phone. Or her lunch.
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Aug 29, 2019 22:32
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SLOSifl posted:Albino Cetaceans Are Beautiful Ahab Craves Aquatic Blubber. The Boys Only Bible will tell me how to become more socially like Jesus? I already hang out with thieves, prostitutes and tax collectors.
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Aug 29, 2019 22:52
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I know the motive is money (via passive-aggressive gift-giving) but there is something else even worse behind it. There has to be. My guess is that it feeds some megachurch in Houston or leads directly to an online community for radicalization. Comes with a companion app that mines bitcoins for a republican in Arizona? Biotruths footnotes with *RAD FACT* sidebars? SLOSifl has a new favorite as of 23:21 on Aug 29, 2019 |
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Aug 29, 2019 23:16
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Flash Gordon Ramsay posted:I only just now got the sexual component of that. My issue with it was it seems to be two edges pieces going to together the wrong way. Yeah it's real bad. "You complete me, but we're clearly two pieces smashed together haphazardly who don't belong together and this will never work." Some next level cynicism in the hallmark writers room.
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Aug 29, 2019 23:22
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Bombadilillo posted:Metaphorical Man, Pokemon took inspiration from the weirdest places, in the past.
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Aug 29, 2019 23:23
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Since the schadenfreude thread got cancelled you can have this. It's a $200,000 BMW police car that was stopped on long dry grass after a high speed pursuit.
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Aug 29, 2019 23:26
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https://twitter.com/rorystewartuk/status/1167046610167181312?s=21
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Aug 29, 2019 23:48
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Doubtful Guest posted:Ahab Craves Aquatic Blubber. This sounds like he is in the prowl for BBW mermaids.
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Aug 29, 2019 23:50
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Paladinus posted:I think your reading of 'created man in His own image' is a bit too literal here. 
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Aug 29, 2019 23:55
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Inceltown posted:Since the schadenfreude thread got cancelled you can have this. It's a $200,000 BMW police car that was stopped on long dry grass after a high speed pursuit. should go in OSHA thread
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Aug 29, 2019 23:57
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Screenshot for when he notices and deletes the tweet. 
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Aug 30, 2019 00:01
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Elfface posted:Screenshot for when he notices and deletes the tweet. It looks like he has two top rows of teeth, side by side.
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Aug 30, 2019 00:04
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Inceltown posted:Since the schadenfreude thread got cancelled you can have this. It's a $200,000 BMW police car that was stopped on long dry grass after a high speed pursuit. watching some car reviews of modern bmw's and they have serious overheating issues...i'm not surprised this happen...but why the hell would the cops spend this kind of cash on a patrol car?
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Aug 30, 2019 00:04
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Phy posted:If you ever get the opportunity to do a whale-watching trip, and you've got a strong stomach, do it in a Zodiac. Debrah can't complain to the police about the whales if she can't hold onto the phone. Or her lunch. Worth it (I didn't go whale watching, I went to a secluded beach and wilderness trail on Kuai'i)
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Aug 30, 2019 00:07
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LifeSunDeath posted:watching some car reviews of modern bmw's and they have serious overheating issues...i'm not surprised this happen...but why the hell would the cops spend this kind of cash on a patrol car? The price tag listed all the fancy equipment like license plate checkers and computer stuff they had in it too.
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Aug 30, 2019 00:14
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Bombadilillo posted:
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Aug 30, 2019 00:16
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Picnic Princess posted:That whale video makes me so mad because that would honestly be the absolute coolest and best thing to ever happen to me, they've been my favourite type of animal since I was a little kid and any time I ever see any species of cetacean I literally shake because I'm so excited and happy. I could die the next day and my life would have been fulfilled. i was swimming with my family at a beach in my home town and there was a sort of inception BWAAARRRPPP in my head as I saw a gigantic orca just sort of slide out of the water about fifteen metres away. 'Get out of the water' I told my daughter. 'Daddy, orca's don't eat people that's a myth,' she replied. 'Nevertheless,' I said. Seriously the thing was loving huge. P neat though.
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Aug 30, 2019 00:57
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The only reason orcas don't eat people is because we haven't given them the chance. I don't trust for a second that if I slathered myself in seal oil, dressed up like a seal, started doing seal stuff in the water, and was around a bunch of starving orcas that they wouldn't at least think about eating me. And as we all know, thinking about doing something, in a lot of ways, is worse than actually doing it. Orcas are basically mental murderers, and I won't hear otherwise. Good day sir. I said good day!
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Aug 30, 2019 01:07
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zedprime posted:You just need to supercut all the really horny parts into a cliff notes at the front and you'll get teenage boys all over your Bible. Too bad the sort of denominations encouraging proselytizing like editing Bible's for specific audiences are very interested in not calling out the horny parts. I'd love an entire bible told like this https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bar3GOzDNzg
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Aug 30, 2019 01:14
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marshmallow creep posted:This sounds like he is in the prowl for BBW mermaids. 
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Aug 30, 2019 01:26
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sebmojo posted:i was swimming with my family at a beach in my home town and there was a sort of inception BWAAARRRPPP in my head as I saw a gigantic orca just sort of slide out of the water about fifteen metres away. Hmph. My speargun, so capably wielded, gives my kids 3-5 minutes of protection against roving orca pods.
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Aug 30, 2019 01:37
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Samovar posted:I remember the Sunday School Dropouts podcast covering a Bible like this, along with a Bible for girls. Never heard of Sunday School Dropouts before. Thanks for bringing it to my attention.
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Aug 30, 2019 01:48
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30-50 feral orcas out there and I can't own a goddamn harpoon
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Aug 30, 2019 01:58
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Iron Crowned posted:In sunday school, I remember I used to get in trouble for reading random poo poo in the bible instead of what we were supposed to be reading. I was declared too old to go to children's church at age 8. Biblical maps got me through a lot of sermons.
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Aug 30, 2019 02:15
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Phy posted:If you ever get the opportunity to do a whale-watching trip, and you've got a strong stomach, do it in a Zodiac. Debrah can't complain to the police about the whales if she can't hold onto the phone. Or her lunch. I actually do quite frequently, it's the only way to go! I've had a few come up pretty close but none coming to check us out so far. It also led to the best/worst whale breach photo I ever took. We were anticipating one coming up for a breach and I had my camera ready and just as it happened these other fuckers cut right in between us. Pricks. 
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Aug 30, 2019 02:16
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Picnic Princess posted:I actually do quite frequently, it's the only way to go! I've had a few come up pretty close but none coming to check us out so far. Don't worry, I got you: 
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Aug 30, 2019 02:45
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Iron Crowned posted:In sunday school, I remember I used to get in trouble for reading random poo poo in the bible instead of what we were supposed to be reading. I'm pretty sure reading random poo poo in the Bible is why I no longer believe in God
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Aug 30, 2019 03:24
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Bertrand Hustle posted:I'm pretty sure reading random poo poo in the Bible is why I no longer believe in God I like that " Don't wear mixed fabrics" and " dont loving EAT SHRIMP >  "
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Aug 30, 2019 03:30
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 https://twitter.com/slavicgarlic
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Aug 30, 2019 03:48
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Bertrand Hustle posted:I'm pretty sure reading random poo poo in the Bible is why I no longer believe in God I believe in God. And I absolutely hate the fucker. That’s a quote from Vin diesel as Riddick in the film Pitch Black. I’m not nearly cool enough to make that line up on my own. I’m sorry if you were misled. By you, I mean a general you, not the poster in particular I’m quoting. And by General you, I mean a nonspecific group of people, not a highly decorated soldier, probably Asian, in the military.
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Aug 30, 2019 03:55
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oldpainless posted:I believe in God. And I absolutely hate the fucker. I tend to side with the Cookie Monster when he quotes Tom Waits' God's Away on Business. He or she simply did a piss poor job, threw up hands and flew away to start working on all the Mormon planets hoping to do better next time. Kind of a scatter gun technique for making a world where good things don't keep happening to bad people.
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Aug 30, 2019 04:26
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oldpainless posted:I believe in God. And I absolutely hate the fucker. more like oldfaithless
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Aug 30, 2019 07:24
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BillyC posted:That poor guy I witnessed a similar experience as a youth when walking with my step-mother and her tiny white poodle through town. An Indo-Canadian family was coming the other way and they all smiled when they saw the dog, except for their 5 or 6 year old, who screamed like a banshee, burst into uncontrollable tears and crawled up his mother's leg as if goddamn Satan had sprung from the earth to take his eternal soul. His family said he had never seen a dog before. I could only wonder what would have happened if the first dog he saw had been a loving rottweiler or something.
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Aug 30, 2019 07:30
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Tony Snark posted:That took me a few seconds as well. I hope you didn't just roll over and go to sleep afterwards.
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Aug 30, 2019 07:56
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LifeSunDeath posted:watching some car reviews of modern bmw's and they have serious overheating issues...i'm not surprised this happen...but why the hell would the cops spend this kind of cash on a patrol car? It's not an overheating issue as such, it's that they presumably ranted the tits off it to the point the exhaust/cat got really hot, then parked on top of some nice dry flammable long grass. The owners manual of my old Subaru had a specific warning about doing that, so it's apparently common enough to require a paragraph in the handbook.
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Aug 30, 2019 11:35
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The second oldest collectible card game still on production is Redemption, a Bible-based card game. zedprime posted:You just need to supercut all the really horny parts into a cliff notes at the front and you'll get teenage boys all over your Bible. Too bad the sort of denominations encouraging proselytizing like editing Bible's for specific audiences are very interested in not calling out the horny parts. Anyone who'd be interested in making a horny Bible to market towards teenage boys should be reported to the FBI immediately.
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Aug 30, 2019 12:36
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LifeLynx posted:The second oldest collectible card game still on production is Redemption, a Bible-based card game. Are you telling me that they are no longer making Wyvern, Netrunner, Star Trek, Star Wars, or the X-files ccgs? What am I going to do with all of these "collectors items"?
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Aug 30, 2019 13:19
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Whooping Crabs posted:Are you telling me that they are no longer making Wyvern, Netrunner, Star Trek, Star Wars, or the X-files ccgs? What am I going to do with all of these "collectors items"?  to a real one
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Aug 30, 2019 13:25
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