cumshitter posted:

There are a surprising number of porn stars on LinkedIn and they love to share "Monday Motivation" style poo poo.

quote:

This is causing a bit of tension so I need to know if I'm in the wrong.

I (33F) moved into my road about 8 years ago and befriended one of the neighbours about 3 doors down, we'll call her Sue (45F), we're not best friends as such but chat often, and sometimes go for food/drinks together. About 12 months ago, I was telling her how my window cleaner (the third I'd tried since I moved) was unreliable, and she gave me the details for hers, Joe (48M) was also a close friend of hers and had been for many years. I called him up and he's been doing my windows ever since, no problems.

Cut to 3 days ago, I bump into Sue and have a chat, she then tells me she's found a new window cleaner. I asked what had happened with Joe, she then reveals they'd started a no strings attached sexual relationship 6 months ago, and she had since developed feelings for Joe, but when she explained this to him, he said he was sorry but wasn't looking for anymore than they already had and ended things. She even admitted that he'd been polite and respectful about it, she was just understandably a little upset he didn't feel the same.

She then said "Don't worry, I've found a new one so I'll give you their details.", I said for her not to worry, I'd just stick with Joe. She became really upset by this and asked "How can you do this after what's he's done to me?!".

This is where I may be TA, I said that Joe hadn't actually done anything wrong, they'd had an agreement which she tried to change because of her feelings and he respectfully ended things to avoid leading her on. I explained I understood why she's upset and needs to find a new window cleaner, but after finally finding one who is reliable, consistent and relatively cheap for our area, I didn't want to have to change to potentially a more expensive and less reliable one yet again.

Sue then called me a terrible friend, swore at me and left. I still don't think I should have to find a new window cleaner because of her. As I explained, we're not best friends or super close, we're friendly neighbours at best, besides that it's not that I'm choosing Joe's side or am even friends with him, I pay him for a service that he does a good job at.

With her reaction, I'm starting to feel that potentially I am TA for being stubborn in this, when it really doesn't matter who cleans my windows, as long as they do a good job/aren't too expensive.

AITA?

cumshitter posted:

There are a surprising number of porn stars on LinkedIn and they love to share "Monday Motivation" style poo poo.

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to change my window cleaner?

Falathrim posted:

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to change my window cleaner?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to change my window cleaner?

zakharov posted:

(rushing into thread out of breath)

Folks, this Japan story is a real beef beef.

Dazerbeams posted:

Also, who the gently caress doesn't make a new email account for business?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to change my window cleaner?

Soylent Pudding posted:

AITA for refusing to change my window cleaner?

Arsenic Lupin posted:

The more of the comments you read, the sadder it gets. The senior partners won't let her offer higher salaries, hire more associates at lower wages, or in general change anything. However, they are holding her responsible for the fact that all their associates are quitting.

Everybody at AAM is saying "This business is doomed, you can't keep doing exactly what you're doing and hoping for a different result. Save yourself." She says "But they owe me money" (always a sign of a great business) and "But my clients depend on me!" to which everybody is pointing out that if she died, they'd have a moment or two of regret and then get on just fine.

Small business that can't compete with the titans on either salary or quality of life (one of the majors is offering one regular guaranteed day off), insisting that things have to be exactly the way they were 40 years ago when the partners were young. OP can't look away from her sunk costs.

quote:

The survey of 1,035 mothers of estranged adult children asked the women about the cause of the estrangement. Many of the moms talked about people who stirred up trouble between them and their adult children. I called these people “influential adversaries” in my book, Done With The Crying. They include the estranged parent’s ex-spouse, a son- or daughter-in-law, or other family members or friends who create division. Nearly two thirds of rejected moms from the new research also talked about an adult child’s mental illness or an addiction as contributing to estrangement.

My own estrangement research consists of more than 50,000 responses to surveys for parents of estranged adult children. I have also personally interviewed hundreds of abandoned moms, dads, and siblings, and I interact with them daily (as well as am a rejected mother myself).

All of this “new” information reads like yesterday’s news. But what is even older is that when the study authors looked at existing research, they found that the adult children cited different reasons for their choice to estrange.

Did you catch that? The adult children who estranged themselves disagreed with their mothers.

Duh-Uh.

I could go on here about the very real problem of parental alienation syndrome, about how those with personality disorders can be neurotically possessive to the point of isolating another person from their own family, and how these persons will generally blame everyone else for their problems … but I won’t.

Many, maybe even most, of you, the loving parents who are rejected by adult children and read this blog, are familiar with one or more of these issues. You have lived through them and suffered the consequences. The supposed revelations of this “new” estrangement research is old news to you, too.

quote:

My son aged 47 is no longer talking to me or his father (my husband). We’ve not really been given a reason, other than that he has objections to a letter I wrote to his wife in response to one of her usual rants to me about where I have gone wrong and what I should be doing. It is obvious to me that the DIL does not like me and probably never has really and because of this their children have been kept at arms length from us all their lives. I’ve put up with this treatment because I did not want to lose my son. We had already seen the consequences of anyone falling out with his wife when he cut off his elder sister for 5 years. The letter the DIL wrote to me (a year ago) caused a sea change in me, I was no longer going to meekly go along with everything she said, so my letter to her was an attempt to put an end to all her recriminations, instead it has caused our son to cut all contact with us, and all because I will no longer participate in their game. I see a counsellor who has helped me to see that I too matter, something that had got lost over 20 years. And I must mention Sheri’s books which have enabled me to look at the whole sorry situation with fresh eyes. I now see that I cannot stop my son choosing not to talk to us but I hope that he too realises he cannot prevent my choice, which is to live as peaceful a life as I can achieve. My thoughts are with all those affected by estrangement.

quote:

I had already seen this new research and was angry at the title. I don’t like “attributions” because it implies we are making an “attribution error.” Why do they always make it sound like the parents are a bunch of idiots who overstep boundaries and make up explanations for our children’s behavior. I know very well that my son’s wife has a personality disorder. She has been diagnosed with one and shared the diagnosis with me back when she adored me.

Soylent Pudding posted:

WIBTA for being a plague doctor at Halloween

Soylent Pudding posted:

WIBTA for being a plague doctor at Halloween

trickybiscuits posted:

Let's see what estranged parents are up to!

 I now see that I cannot stop my son choosing not to talk to us but I hope that he too realises he cannot prevent my choice, which is to live as peaceful a life as I can achieve.

MarcusSA posted:

No but seriously how often to people actually get their windows washed where it would be a thing you need a regular guy for?

MarcusSA posted:

No but seriously how often to people actually get their windows washed where it would be a thing you need a regular guy for?

MarcusSA posted:

No but seriously how often to people actually get their windows washed where it would be a thing you need a regular guy for?

thotsky posted:

I have never had my windows washed.

MarcusSA posted:

No but seriously how often to people actually get their windows washed where it would be a thing you need a regular guy for?

BlancoNino posted:

I live in New England near the coast and washing windows is a big chunk of my work. I don't have any gently caress buddies because it's mostly WASPy old fucks. I have seen a lot of these people twice a year for a decade or so. People who have storefronts I'll see once a month.

MarcusSA posted:

No but seriously how often to people actually get their windows washed where it would be a thing you need a regular guy for?

MarcusSA posted:

Sounds like a regional thing. I'm on the west coast and I've never had it done lol

Cythereal posted:

This is my guess. Doesn't live close to her family, doesn't talk to them on social media, refers to going to see her family as 'driving down' to them? Good odds she's Southern with a standard-issue white trash family who went to college further north and improved her life substantially.

The crab mentality is real.

Dazerbeams posted:

What's the hobby you jackass?

Zurtilik posted:

I [29M] am having difficulty playing boyfriend of instagram for my GF [30F].

quote:

> 100 photos of our fine dining experience last night with another couple

webmeister posted:

My inlaws live on the coast (literally within 50m of the ocean) and clean their windows every couple of weeks. They get covered in salt and sea spray from the sea breezes, and the gunk builds up pretty quickly if you don't stay on top of it. Cars too, you've gotta wash the car pretty much every week.

They don't have window washer though, it's not exactly a difficult task unless you have super high windows

Soylent Pudding posted:

I recently hired a creative freelancer for a thing. The policies packet had a sentence "btw remember this code phrase form the contract". Then the contract itself had not only the "initial here to say you read the policies" box but asked for the code phrase from the policies packet. I thought it was a brilliant idea.

Barudak posted:

Kobe beef, like all japanese meat cuts, is trash and there is a considerable market in Japan for imported and alternate cut beef to escape it.

This is what the "no green m&m" rider for bands was about. That sentence was in the stage setup instructions packet which included all the safety info, so if they walked into the backstage area and saw green m&ms in the bowl they knew the fuckers didn't read it and the stage was probably unsafe

Foo Diddley posted:

they were brown M&Ms and now van halen is going to sue you

Barudak posted:

Kobe beef, like all japanese meat cuts, is trash and there is a considerable market in Japan for imported and alternate cut beef to escape it.

Rescue Toaster posted:

I had some kind of... not kobe I guess but some high-grade wagyu at one point. It's... unique? But it's like 50% (or more?) fat and is totally different than what most of the world would consider a 'steak'. Meat flavored butter? It certainly doesn't make a good old fashioned ribeye or filet obsolete.

quote:

I (28F) do babysitting on the weekends to make some babysitting on the weekends to make extra cash. There is one family I definitely should've fazed out by now but the kids are cute and if I don't have another job, it's easy money. My issue is, the mom is never home on time. She used to not give me return times but finally I started asking as it made it impossible to get anything done on the weekends. I'd go babysit so she could go to "brunch" but she'd be gone from 11 AM to 7 PM. My whole day was gone. After that, she'd start giving me times but never stick to them. She wouldn't even call to tell me, she'd just stay out.

On Saturday, I got to her house at 6 and she was supposed to be home by 9. I told her she needed to be on time because I had plans to go out with friends. I was even getting ready at their house after I put the kids to be. She promised. Of course, 9:00 rolls around and she's not home. I call her, no response. Text, no response. Another hour. Nothing. Still calling and texting. Finally, it is midnight. By this point, my plans are long ruined but I'm pissed and exhausted. I call her and leave a voicemail saying if she's not home in the next hour, I'm considering the kids abandoned and calling the cops. I also text her this. I try calling her 30 minutes later and it goes to voicemail on the second ring, I text her again and she leaves me on read. If she had reached out saying "Hey, I'm staying out until x time", I would've stayed. I don't know any of her family nor the father of the kids so I can't call them. I gave her a grace period of 15 minutes and tried calling again, finally called the cops (non-emergency line). They showed up and I showed our agreement in text from earlier in the week confirming that she'd be home by 9. They try contacting her, didn't answer. I was dismissed and they took the children to the police station. I go home and go to bed.

I am awoken at 3 AM by a frantic call. It's her. Where are the kids? Why am I not here? I tell her I followed through on my threat, check the police station. She cursed me out, I hung up and went to bed.

The next day, she sends me an essay saying the kids' father was called and there's a DCF investigation launched against her. She called me every name under the sun but I didn't think I was wrong until I spoke to a friend with kids. She said I should've just waited it out and refuse to ever sit for her again. She asked if her potentially losing her kids was worth me being petty.