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haveblue
Aug 15, 2005



Toilet Rascal

Cream-of-Plenty posted:

When life covers you in switches, start flicking them and see what they open up.

They open up sores on your neighbor, who also caught hexen

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Hasturtium
May 19, 2020

And that year, for his birthday, he got six pink ping pong balls in a little pink backpack.

haveblue posted:

They open up sores on your neighbor, who also caught hexen

In an intriguing turn of events, wiping the switches with a damp cloth and draping that cloth over the rash Witchaven gives you results in a full cure within an hour.

A Worrying Warlock
Sep 21, 2009

Hasturtium posted:

In an intriguing turn of events, wiping the switches with a damp cloth and draping that cloth over the rash Witchaven gives you results in a full cure within an hour.

A guy I knew had this done to him. He died the next day.

Turned out that he'd had Chex Quest as a kid, and it never really leaves your system. They had to cremate the body.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?
Anyone ever played chex quest hd?

Convex
Aug 19, 2010

Sobatchja Morda posted:

A guy I knew had this done to him. He died the next day.

Turned out that he'd had Chex Quest as a kid, and it never really leaves your system. They had to cremate the body.

Yeah the really nasty ones can sit dormant and activate years later. A Microsoft executive was hospitalised recently after a nasty resurgence of cybermage

SkeletonHero
Sep 7, 2010

:dehumanize:
:killing:
:dehumanize:
Back in MY day we...
hunted for SWITCHES to flip
Healed with MEDPACKS (no Regen!!)
had 8 WEAPONS and only 4 ammo POOLS
We wore ARMOR
And found SECRETS
ate FOOD off the FLOOR
...AND WE TURNED OUT ALRIGHT!

Only true PATRIOTS will share this!!!!!
LIKE if u love TCHERNOBOG!!! I bet 90% people won't!!!!

Malcolm Excellent
May 20, 2007

Buglord

SkeletonHero posted:

Back in MY day we...
hunted for SWITCHES to flip
Healed with MEDPACKS (no Regen!!)
had 8 WEAPONS and only 4 ammo POOLS
We wore ARMOR
And found SECRETS
ate FOOD off the FLOOR
...AND WE TURNED OUT ALRIGHT!

Only true PATRIOTS will share this!!!!!
LIKE if u love TCHERNOBOG!!! I bet 90% people won't!!!!

🙏🙌🦅🌎

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?
drat good pastiche

Couldn't really think to add anything to it that isn't redundant and just said worse

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010

"The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering."

SkeletonHero posted:

Back in MY day we...
hunted for SWITCHES to flip
Healed with MEDPACKS (no Regen!!)
had 8 WEAPONS and only 4 ammo POOLS
We wore ARMOR
And found SECRETS
ate FOOD off the FLOOR
...AND WE TURNED OUT ALRIGHT!

Gonna print this on a stretched canvas and hang it up in my kitchen for guests

Mordja
Apr 26, 2014

Hell Gem
Hey what was that Half Life/some HL mod map with an incredibly complicated secret that culminates in you getting devoured by a lovecraftian entity?

Kazvall
Mar 20, 2009

Mordja posted:

Hey what was that Half Life/some HL mod map with an incredibly complicated secret that culminates in you getting devoured by a lovecraftian entity?

Action hl hondo maps?

Nostalgamus
Sep 28, 2010

KajiTheMelonMan posted:

You lay dying in bed, begging for swift relief from the itch

God's face appears to you



I expected the face to fade away revealing a room covered in switches.

Mierenneuker
Apr 28, 2010


We're all going to experience changes in our life but only the best of us will qualify for front row seats.

Nostalgamus posted:

I expected the face to fade away revealing a room covered in switches.

All the switches in a single room? That's cute.

Guillermus
Dec 28, 2009



SkeletonHero posted:

Back in MY day we...
hunted for SWITCHES to flip
Healed with MEDPACKS (no Regen!!)
had 8 WEAPONS and only 4 ammo POOLS
We wore ARMOR
And found SECRETS
ate FOOD off the FLOOR
...AND WE TURNED OUT ALRIGHT!

Only true PATRIOTS will share this!!!!!
LIKE if u love TCHERNOBOG!!! I bet 90% people won't!!!!

i HaTe MiMeS

The Kins
Oct 2, 2004
Console version of ROTT is delayed by a few weeks due to dumb cert stuff, PC version is unaffected and will still be out July 31.

Convex
Aug 19, 2010

Guillermus posted:

i HaTe MiMeS


help i can't stop watching this gif

Baron von Eevl
Jan 24, 2005

WHITE NOISE
GENERATOR

🔊😴

Mierenneuker posted:

All the switches in a single room? That's cute.

Each switch is hidden behind a locked door, to unlock each door you have to find and hit the switch in another map, and the switch in the switchroom will unlock exactly one other hidden switch in a different map.

Sorry, I don't make the rules.

juggalo baby coffin
Dec 2, 2007

How would the dog wear goggles and even more than that, who makes the goggles?


Cream-of-Plenty posted:

Gonna print this on a stretched canvas and hang it up in my kitchen for guests

one of those big ugly blue lives magic american flags but with a brown line and a cultist from Blood



IN THIS HOUSE WE STAND FOR THE CRUDUX AND KNEEL FOR THE CRUO!

Woolie Wool
Jun 2, 2006


that might be the worst piece of right wing kitsch I have ever seen :barf:

Tiny Timbs
Sep 6, 2008

congrats on the twitter rebrand, zane

site
Apr 6, 2007

Trans pride, Worldwide
Bitch
to go back to painkiller chat for a second, i have painkiller gold edition on steam, but it doesn't even have a store page anymore. does anyone know what that is/the difference between it and black

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Slayers X having ways to bypass keys if you are insanely exploratory (or just replaying the level) is an unexpected and pretty neat thing.

Cowboy Rat is the best rat (so far)

Volte
Oct 4, 2004

woosh woosh

site posted:

to go back to painkiller chat for a second, i have painkiller gold edition on steam, but it doesn't even have a store page anymore. does anyone know what that is/the difference between it and black
Seems like the same thing. It says Painkiller Black Edition on the title screen.

site
Apr 6, 2007

Trans pride, Worldwide
Bitch
oh. so it does. ty

John Murdoch
May 19, 2009

I can tune a fish.
Glancing at Wikipedia, it appears Gold was the original combined retail release (over a whopping 6 CDs) and Black was the (possibly slightly spruced up) DVD version.

And then I had to remind myself that the game's old enough that such a distinction would be reflected in the Steam version at one point, in some fashion.

John Murdoch fucked around with this message at 05:38 on Jul 25, 2023

juggalo baby coffin
Dec 2, 2007

How would the dog wear goggles and even more than that, who makes the goggles?


a shocking oversight in slayers x is that the triple rocket launcher uses 1 ammo to fire, instead of using 3 ammo and forcing you to constantly do annoying, odd-number division to figure out how much ammo you actually have for it

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010

"The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering."

juggalo baby coffin posted:

a shocking oversight in slayers x is that the triple rocket launcher uses 1 ammo to fire, instead of using 3 ammo and forcing you to constantly do annoying, odd-number division to figure out how much ammo you actually have for it

They shoulda made it use 3 rockets per volley, pickups 5 rockets each, and also you can't fire the gun if you somehow have fewer than 3 rockets.

Convex
Aug 19, 2010

Gaspy Conana posted:

nah tho we're probably gonna be adding accessibility menus with stuff like that in an update.

Awesome, thanks!

Dieting Hippo
Jan 5, 2006

THIS IS NOT A PROPER DIET FOR A HIPPO

juggalo baby coffin posted:

a shocking oversight in slayers x is that the triple rocket launcher uses 1 ammo to fire, instead of using 3 ammo and forcing you to constantly do annoying, odd-number division to figure out how much ammo you actually have for it

I love this rocket launcher. Black Ops II had a crossbow with explosive bolts, and you could get it so it would shoot three, but the three fired sequentially. You could fan three explosions across a map if you moved fast enough while firing and be a distance explosion maniac. It was a lot easier to pull off with a wiimote and pointer controls too!

I get the same experience with this, and the thrill of making a wide crowd of Psykos explode at once is well earned.

juggalo baby coffin
Dec 2, 2007

How would the dog wear goggles and even more than that, who makes the goggles?


Cream-of-Plenty posted:

They shoulda made it use 3 rockets per volley, pickups 5 rockets each, and also you can't fire the gun if you somehow have fewer than 3 rockets.

hey hey settle down there john romero

the shotcycler is still maybe my favourite stupid fps weapon. a shotgun that fires individual belts of 6 shells that are just kinda laid on top of the gun then pulled in, each shell fired in sequence, uninterruptable, and usable for rocket jumping

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Is the final boss of slayers x a puzzle boss? He phase transitioned, I fired one volley of rockets, he died.

Gaspy Conana
Aug 1, 2004

this clown loves you
another bug exclusive to the gp version unfortunately. the fix for that is coming in the aforementioned patch.

Malcolm Excellent
May 20, 2007

Buglord
How am I supposed to know when the S Blade has a HACKBLOOD CHARGE?

Tiny Timbs
Sep 6, 2008

juggalo baby coffin posted:

a shocking oversight in slayers x is that the triple rocket launcher uses 1 ammo to fire, instead of using 3 ammo and forcing you to constantly do annoying, odd-number division to figure out how much ammo you actually have for it

that's why it's sick

Barudak
May 7, 2007

Malcolm Excellent posted:

How am I supposed to know when the S Blade has a HACKBLOOD CHARGE?

Its subtle, but there is a little indicator on the UI how many charges it has. I agree it would be easier if Zane would just say something if he had a hackblood charge.

Cream-of-Plenty
Apr 21, 2010

"The world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering."

juggalo baby coffin posted:

hey hey settle down there john romero

the shotcycler is still maybe my favourite stupid fps weapon. a shotgun that fires individual belts of 6 shells that are just kinda laid on top of the gun then pulled in, each shell fired in sequence, uninterruptable, and usable for rocket jumping

I actually wanted to directly reference it in my post but I couldn’t remember if that’s the way the shotcycler behaved, and the wiki I landed on didn’t clarify this. So it’s good to be vindicated.

Milo and POTUS
Sep 3, 2017

I will not shut up about the Mighty Morphin Power Rangers. I talk about them all the time and work them into every conversation I have. I built a shrine in my room for the yellow one who died because sadly no one noticed because she died around 9/11. Wanna see it?
I want to play some older and throwback shooters so bad but I am completely tired of almost every game I have, probably all. UT04 growing on me though. I'd do the single player but man I hate the ai teammates. I don't even wanna do a runthrough of the selaco or beyond sunset demos anymore.

Cream-of-Plenty posted:

Regarding why some games don't count toward the "perfect games" count, it's generally because the game is in the "Steam is learning about this game" state or is in the "Profile features limited" state. For reference, this is on the Zortch page right now:
...which means that Steam is still trying to suss out if the product is junkware or not--and until that happens, its stats won't affect your profile metrics, basically.

To my understanding, games have to generally sell a certain volume, have a certain number of reviews, or come from developers/publishers with a preexisting reputable catalog on Steam to circumvent this limitation.

Btw Zortch achievos did end up working if anyone was looking for a quick game to perfect

Milo and POTUS fucked around with this message at 20:31 on Jul 25, 2023

juggalo baby coffin
Dec 2, 2007

How would the dog wear goggles and even more than that, who makes the goggles?


Tiny Timbs posted:

that's why it's sick

oh yeah it wasnt a genuine criticism i'm glad they did it that way

Bumhead
Sep 26, 2022

Milo and POTUS posted:

I want to play some older and throwback shooters so bad but I am completely tired of almost every game I have, probably all. UT04 growing on me though. I'd do the single player but man I hate the ai teammates. I don't even wanna do a runthrough of the selaco or beyond sunset demos anymore.

I fired up Cultic for the first time the other day and was just very "Eeeeeeeeeeeeehh...?" about the whole thing, which makes me think I need a little break.

I have been playing (and really enjoying) a ton of Quake recently so I probably do just need to change it up a bit, although I think there might also be a risk that the only modern/indie boomer shooter I actually like is Dusk. I continue to have mixed experiences with the others and that would be a shame. Might shelve Cultic until I'm really itching to play one.

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Guillermus
Dec 28, 2009



Cultic is more of a first person turbo charged Resident Evil 4 with Blood inserted in.

It's awesome

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