r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

The trash is threatening to take itself out.

WIBTA if i go on a cruise against my girlfriend�s wishes

quote:

My girlfriend and i were broken up in December, at which time i planned a cruise with my friends. During this time she admittedly said she thought she�d never see me again. So obviously I didnt make these plans out of spite. Now that we�re back together, she wants me to cancel. Problem is Ive already spent somewhere around $3,500, none of which is refundable. She says the money doesnt matter if i value our relationship and I should respect her feelings of jealousy and give her �her place as my woman�. This jealousy stems from the fact that one of the friends is female, the other two friends male. Ive known her for over ten years, she�s always been an amazing, supportive friend when times were dark. We were never in a relationship and there was never an ounce of sexual tension or that sort of thing. We both got along well with each other�s boyfriend/girlfriends throughout these ten years as well.

So WIBTA if i go? I do not think iwbta at all. In any world, is this a valid and reasonable request on her part?

Edit: She says she wont be here when i get back if i go. So she�s going to die on this hill

Edit 2.0: by her own words, this is also not a trust issue. This is 100% a jealousy issue. No cheating ever occurred

Commenters fall all over themselves to tell OP that his GF should have no problem reimbursing him the $3500 you've spent for the trip, because after all, "money doesn't matter".

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:09

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 13, 2024 22:17

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

Yeah funny how money doesn't matter when it's not your own

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:10

DemoneeHo: Nov 9, 2017; Come on hee-ho, just give us 300 more macca

HelleSpud posted:

For poop chat, this guy's wife convinced him that taking a shower and washing his rear end counted as foreplay:

Comments in the thread:

lol amazing. I am baffled that the filth goblin doesn't use know how to work a bidet or doesn't seem to use toilet paper to dry up after using the bidet.

Ask Amy: Grandpa was a corrupt cop. Should we tell our kids?

quote:

Dear Amy: My father in-law is a retired law enforcement officer. Due to scientific advances since his retirement, it turns out that much of his career was a sham. DNA evidence has exonerated many of the people that he put behind bars � to such a large extent that a television network chose to air a story about him and his corrupt practices a number of years ago. He claims that he did the best with the information that he had.

Nevertheless, it has become obvious that he let his own biases and prejudices, and yes, racism, get the better of him and he put innocent people in jail. This has become the family secret that no one talks about.

My children, now almost adults, only know that their grandfather had a distinguished career in law enforcement. He is now in poor health and I am struggling with whether or not my children deserve to hear the truth about their grandfather. On the one hand there seems to be nothing to gain by telling them the truth, but on the other hand, well, it�s the truth and perhaps they should know it.

Your advice?

� On the Fence

On the Fence: Yes, your children do deserve to know the truth about their grandfather, but I don�t believe this is the right time, or you are the right person, to deliver it.

This man is your father-in-law. I assume that you have a spouse on the scene and that this person is your father-in-law�s child. You should encourage your spouse to approach this topic from a place of disclosure and honesty, but your spouse should make some basic choices about the timing. If your father-in-law�s unlawful acts resulted in a televised depiction of his corruption, your children will find it if they Google his name.

After your father-in-law�s death, obituaries might note some of these scandals and crimes, inspiring your children to ask you about his history. You should point them toward accurate sources for information, and encourage them to ask family members about their grandfather�s role in this terrible and tragic history. They might expect some defensive responses or even stonewalling from family members, which is why they should seek more accurate or media sources for this information.

I know shame is a powerful force, but if you haven't actively disavowed racist cop grandpa by now, then I don't have a whole lot of sympathy for OP's internal struggle.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:11

Harold Fjord: Jan 3, 2004

Cookie Cutter posted:

This hero of a woman discovered the insecure guy cheat codes. Ooh it makes me sooooooo horny when you shower and clean yourself babe

My wife does this whenever I'm depressed and miss a day. She's the best.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:15

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

AITA for refusing to lend my sister my car for her road trip after she criticized my lifestyle?

quote:

My sister (27F) and I (25F) have always had a bit of a rocky relationship. Nothing out of the ordinary about sister dramas. But this would be our biggest argument ever. I'm not sure if it's my fault but I own a fairly new, reliable car that I've taken great care of, and I'm pretty proud of it. My sister's car, on the other hand, is older and has been having a lot of issues lately. I don't mean to demean her about that, just trying to picture out why she decided to borrow my car as she's planning a road trip next month with her friends. Normally, I wouldn't mind lending her my car for a day or two, but this trip is for over a week, and it would leave me without transportation.

What really made me hesitant, though, was something she had said about me recently. We were talking about our lives and future plans, and she made several remarks about my lifestyle. I'm currently freelancing and enjoying the flexibility it offers me, plus I'm not close to planning to have a family yet so I am single, alone, and I love my job and current set up. But she implied that my job is not "real" and that I'm not thinking about my future seriously. This hurt me quite a bit, as I value my independence and am proud of what I've achieved on my own.

When she asked to borrow my car, I reminded her of her comments and told her that if she doesn't respect my choices or lifestyle, then I don't feel comfortable doing her such a big favor. She got really upset, saying that I'm petty and selfish. She argued that family should help each other out regardless of personal opinions.

Our parents think I should just let her borrow the car to keep the peace and while I do agree that family should help each other I feel like this is about more than just the car. I don't feel valued and supported so why would I go out of my way to support her? Should I be the bigger person and eat up her slight belittling? AITA?

But we're family, I'm supposed to get a free pass for making GBS threads on you :qq:

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:25

Hughlander: May 11, 2005

Lemniscate Blue posted:

Oh Fry, I love it when you PRACTICE RUDIMENTARY HYGIENE.

Suddenly Futurama

Am I wrong for cutting off support to my cousin after she dissed my lifestyle?

quote:

My cousin, let�s call her Sara (41F), and I (28M) were pretty close. Grew up together, and even when life took us on different paths, we tried to keep that bond. I�ve done alright for myself, started a small business that�s been picking up. Not swimming in dough, but comfortable.
Sara, on the other hand, has been through a rough patch. Lost her job a year ago, and it�s been tough with the job market being what it is. I�ve been helping out where I can, you know, groceries, bills, just to help her keep afloat until she finds something stable.
A week ago, we were at this family get-together. Was all good until Sara starts going off about how people our age are too focused on money, losing sight of what�s important. Okay, fine, everyone�s entitled to their opinion. But then she singles me out, in front of everyone, saying I�m living this superficial lifestyle, chasing material things and forgetting where I come from. Said I�m too caught up with my �fancy new friends� and that I�ve abandoned my roots and family values.
I was stunned. Like, where did that even come from? We�ve always supported each other, and here she is, throwing me under the bus in front of the whole family. I tried to brush it off, but it kept eating at me.
Couple of days later, she hits me up, asking if I can cover her rent again this month. And I just... I couldn�t. I told her that if she thinks so poorly of how I live my life, maybe she shouldn�t be taking my money. She got all defensive, saying she was just speaking her mind and didn�t think I�d take it personally.
I�ve been stewing over this. Part of me feels like I did the right thing, standing up for myself. But then, I know she�s struggling, and I feel like a jerk for pulling the plug over some heated words.
So, am I wrong for cutting off financial support to Sara after she bad-mouthed my lifestyle? It�s been a rough few days trying to sort through this mess.

Nom Nom I love this hand, you so abandoned family values as you are the only thing keeping me fed and housed.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:29

ReelBigLizard: Feb 27, 2003; Fallen Rib

Apologies, moving to E/N

ReelBigLizard fucked around with this message at 19:25 on Mar 6, 2024

# ? Mar 6, 2024 18:59

Shishkahuben: Mar 5, 2009

Hughlander posted:

Suddenly Futurama

Am I wrong for cutting off support to my cousin after she dissed my lifestyle?

Nom Nom I love this hand, you so abandoned family values as you are the only thing keeping me fed and housed.

Captain Hygiene posted:

But we're family, I'm supposed to get a free pass for making GBS threads on you

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:04

Halloween Jack: Sep 12, 2003; Can't post for 2 hours!

I understand why you posted this in the Scandinavia thread, but I'm trying to figure out why this was the only other thread you posted it in.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:04

ReelBigLizard: Feb 27, 2003; Fallen Rib

Halloween Jack posted:

I understand why you posted this in the Scandinavia thread, but I'm trying to figure out why this was the only other thread you posted it in.

It's busy and on topic honestly the scandi thread is cold for a while

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:06

Seth Pecksniff: May 27, 2004; can't believe shrek is fucking dead. rip to a real one.

ReelBigLizard posted:

It's busy and on topic honestly the scandi thread is cold for a while

I feel for your friend but this isn't the thread for that sort of thing. Maybe e/n?

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:11

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

DemoneeHo posted:

lol amazing. I am baffled that the filth goblin doesn't use know how to work a bidet or doesn't seem to use toilet paper to dry up after using the bidet.

Ask Amy: Grandpa was a corrupt cop. Should we tell our kids?

Oh Amy go gently caress yourself, no it doesn't have to come from the guys son or else it's rude. The whole 'the family handles poo poo within the family' stuff is yesteryear decorum that works to protect shitheads like this. His father has cast shame upon the whole family and there's no 'good time' to air out that poo poo, trying to let him 'define the timing' blegh. His own shame blocking him from doing what is right is already the issue here, letting him decide how much longer they can put it off is not gonna help. He can't diminish the shame by revealing it at the perfect time, as much as he might wish that. Dude failed to rip the band-aid years ago and is now too paralyzed to do it, so someone else will have to do it.

And if someone is a big enough rear end in a top hat there's the specials about how bad they hosed up and ruined lives, they've very much forfeited the right to privacy on that one. The kids should make sure it's spray painted on his loving grave.

StrangersInTheNight fucked around with this message at 19:21 on Mar 6, 2024

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:12

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

Ask A Manager comment

quote:

I did exactly that when I was the new person in a huge meeting. I said �I did not understand that last point you made. Could you restate it and clarify what you�re planning on achieving with this project?� I figured I�d get roasted but I really did need to understand what the guy was saying. The speaker said he could not dumb things down enough so someone like me would be capable of understanding anything he said. That prompted someone else to say �I have no idea what you�re trying to say either but your projects don�t affect me so I wasn�t going to question anything. The fact that you�re so defensive about being asked to explain what you�re talking about changes that.� Things got really interesting after that.

Alas, they do not expand on how things got interesting.

Hughlander posted:

Am I wrong for cutting off support to my cousin after she dissed my lifestyle?

quote:
But then she singles me out, in front of everyone
. . . .

she was just speaking her mind and didn�t think I�d take it personally.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:13

Johnny Truant: Jul 22, 2008

Tijuana-A-Go-Go posted:

there's no way this defence works

I just did a sensory dep tank for the first time and that guy's about to get fuuuuuucked lol, they cover all that stuff in their legal documents :iiapa:

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:17

the holy poopacy: May 16, 2009; hey! check this out; Fun Shoe

Clocks posted:

Yeah.

The cynical take is that since his ex-wife was very quick to point out that he got into this because of his lovely family dynamics, she was aware of how trashy his family was while they were married. Possibly she tried to get him to see it or tried to get him to take her side but he listened to his friends/dad instead.

It doesn't un-abuse him or anything, but also he was an adult who probably could have turned his brain on earlier. He's also not the only person who was affected, and he basically passed it on to his (ex)wife. Now he's reaping what he's sown.

I'm sure she was getting plenty of direct abuse from his lovely family in addition to what they were indirectly dealing out via him, so she probably commisserates with him as a fellow victim.

He got sympathy for the abuse he suffered but still has to deal with the consequences of the abuse he perpetuated, so like I said, he got exactly everything he deserved.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:18

ReelBigLizard: Feb 27, 2003; Fallen Rib

Seth Pecksniff posted:

I feel for your friend but this isn't the thread for that sort of thing. Maybe e/n?

Apologies I am on super patchy connection and I was just trying to get something out before we're in the middle of the Baltic for the whole night. I'll delete and repost there as quickly as I can

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:22

Gadzuko: Feb 14, 2005

ReelBigLizard posted:

This is a long shot and probably against the thread rules, if so I'll take the rap because I'm out of options:

Sorry about your friend but FYI spoiler tagging personal information does not do anything to prevent it from getting scraped by bots or viewed by guests, so you probably want to edit that out unless you are comfortable with having your email and phone publicly posted forever

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:23

mystes: May 31, 2006

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for refusing to lend my sister my car for her road trip after she criticized my lifestyle?

But we're family, I'm supposed to get a free pass for making GBS threads on you

If the sister has a "real" job and the OP doesn't then why doesn't the sister just buy a new car with her real job money if her current one is that unreliable rather than leech off her more financially precarious sister? Seems pretty lovely of the sister.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:27

StrangersInTheNight: Dec 31, 2007; ABSOLUTE FUCKING GUDGEON

ReelBigLizard posted:

Apologies I am on super patchy connection and I was just trying to get something out before we're in the middle of the Baltic for the whole night. I'll delete and repost there as quickly as I can

I don't know how to help but I wish you and your friend good luck and good tidings. May she escape to safety and find a new life beyond.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:30

MagusofStars: Mar 31, 2012

Captain Hygiene posted:

AITA for refusing to lend my sister my car for her road trip after she criticized my lifestyle?

But we're family, I'm supposed to get a free pass for making GBS threads on you

I can�t imagine loaning my only vehicle out for someone else to take a week-long road trip, full stop, even before we get to the lifestyle criticism.

mystes posted:

If the sister has a "real" job and the OP doesn't then why doesn't the sister just buy a new car with her real job money if her current one is that unreliable rather than leech off her more financially precarious sister? Seems pretty lovely of the sister.

If only there was an enterprising car rental business where sister could use the money from her Real Job to borrow a vehicle for a week. :thunk:

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:35

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

Some finely-executed revenge.

AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them?

quote:

My grandparents give each of their grandkids enough to buy a house when we graduate from college. We have to get through college on our own. My older brother made it through with some debt so he paid that off and still had enough for a 50% down payment and money in the bank for emergencies.

I was lucky enough to qualify for a scholarship as well as a bursary through my father's employer. When I graduated I bought a small house close to public transportation so I could take the train to work.

A few years later I met and married my husband. He met my cousin Yvonne at my wedding.

She is beautiful. I know I'm not ugly but she is gorgeous. They started an affair about three months after the wedding. I found out because they are both stupid.

I was hurt. But more than that I was furious. I wanted to kick him out immediately and divorce him.

Instead I waited almost six more months. A month before she graduated from university I went to my grandparents and broke down. I told them that I just found out about the cheating and that I was shattered. That my own family would do that to me. I stayed with them for a couple of weeks. My husband tried to get to me but I didn't talk to him. My grandmother helped me get a lawyer for the divorce during this time.

My cousin has basically been shunned by the family now. My house was a premarital asset and was covered in our prenup. I gave my ex one month to move out.

My grandparents are old school about marriage and family. They are beyond pissed. They said that they couldn't fix what she did but they could make their displeasure clear. They gave me her money.

She had taken out student loans since she knew she could pay them back. She also chose a degree that was not exactly in the STEM areas so she will not be making a great salary coming out of school.

My ex is begging me to let him stay because he loves me. I said that he would not sleep with other women if he loved me. I know he doesn't. He just did the math and found out how hosed he is.

My aunt and uncle are pissed off at me for screwing their baby out of so much money. I want to be clear here. It was never my intention to take her money. I just wanted our grandparents to not give it to her. Me getting it was just frosting on the cake.

Right now the family is divided but mostly on my side. They do not want to openly disagree with my grandparents.

Everything is over and done with. The divorce will take a little more time but my money is in my retirement account. My ex is out of my house. And my cousin can go gently caress herself.

I feel guilty about not confronting them immediately and for bringing my grandparents into it. My ex asked me how I knew. I told the dumbass his texts were all showing up on our tablet before he deleted them. I had screenshots of everything.

So I guess I'm asking if I went too far and whether that makes me the only rear end in a top hat in this situation.

A dish best served cold, indeed.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:43

Magic Hate Ball: May 6, 2007; ha ha ha!
you've already paid for this

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:49

Captain Hygiene: Sep 17, 2007; You mess with the crabbo...

MagusofStars posted:

I can’t imagine loaning my only vehicle out for someone else to take a week-long road trip, full stop, even before we get to the lifestyle criticism.

Yeah. I've been on the borrower's end with my dad's car before when I had my own car trouble, but between the family members who lived at home they had plenty of vehicles to get around. I wouldn't have even thought about doing that if it would've impacted their ability to drive somewhere.

e:

Magic Hate Ball posted:

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:49

haveblue: Aug 15, 2005; Toilet Rascal

Magic Hate Ball posted:

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:51

BOOTY-ADE: Aug 30, 2006; BIG KOOL TELLIN' Y'ALL TO KEEP IT TIGHT

Pope Corky the IX posted:

From what I remember she was told by a coworker at IHOP.

brilliance

# ? Mar 6, 2024 19:52

Vim Fuego: Jun 1, 2000; I LITERALLY SLEEP IN A RACING CAR. DO YOU?
p.s. ask me about my subscription mattress; Ultra Carp

FMguru posted:

AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them?

quote:

My ex asked me how I knew. I told the dumbass his texts were all showing up on our tablet before he deleted them.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:08

The Maroon Hawk: May 10, 2008

FMguru posted:

Some finely-executed revenge.

AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them?

A dish best served cold, indeed.

My eyes just about shot out of my head at �they gave me her money� :lol:

Magic Hate Ball posted:

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:11

SpaceViking: Sep 2, 2011; Who put the stars in the sky? Coyote will say he did it himself, and it is not a lie.

FMguru posted:

AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them?

"Incredibly stupid guys trying to be sneaky" is one of my favorite genres.

Edit: a short and sweet one.

AITAH for telling my gf no more Vegas until debt is paid?

quote:

We�re about to move in together. After much prodding I 49m just found out she 42f has almost 50k in cc debt mostly from gambling. We both make low 6 figures so this seems like a huge debt especially with nothing to show for it. I�m starting to ask a lot more questions and I�m saying she should completely stop gambling and going to Vegas until this is paid and I want to see more financial info.(she�s been going 1-2x a year for a long time sometimes with friends, and twice with me). I�m thinking of canceling moving in if she doesn�t start complying. AITAH?

SpaceViking fucked around with this message at 20:15 on Mar 6, 2024

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:11

FMguru: Sep 10, 2003; peed on;
sexually

The Maroon Hawk posted:

My eyes just about shot out of my head at �they gave me her money�

LOL at the ex begging her to take him back. "Baby, I only love you!" - yeah, you demonstrated that by not even waiting until they swept up the confetti from our wedding reception before you starting loving my hot cousin.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:15

Saint Isaias Boner: Jan 17, 2007; hi how are you ♥

Magic Hate Ball posted:

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:22

rotinaj: Sep 5, 2008; Fun Shoe

SpaceViking posted:

"Incredibly stupid guys trying to be sneaky" is one of my favorite genres.

Edit: a short and sweet one.

AITAH for telling my gf no more Vegas until debt is paid?

Wow what a catch

If he is lucky, she will begin opening credit cards in his name to gamble with

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:25

NGDBSS: Dec 30, 2009

Lemniscate Blue posted:

Oh Fry, I love it when you PRACTICE RUDIMENTARY HYGIENE.

This is historically accurate! Back in the 1200s John of Wallingford claimed that Danish men seduced English women through basic cleanliness.

A smelly monk posted:

the Danes, thanks to their habit of combing their hair every day, of bathing every Saturday and regularly changing their clothes, were able to undermine the virtue of married women and even seduce the daughters of nobles to be their mistresses.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:36

quantumwell: Jun 22, 2013

Magic Hate Ball posted:

r/relationships: I found out because they are both stupid

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:47

trickybiscuits: Jan 13, 2008; yospos

SpaceViking posted:

"Incredibly stupid guys trying to be sneaky" is one of my favorite genres.

I love when someone makes some kind of argument that they think will get them out of trouble but it's awful. Sovereign citizens are a good example.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:54

Troublemaker: Mar 12, 2007

Alien Arcana posted:

...and what, exactly, did you do with the fourth banana?

It's okay, it's still alive! (the recipe only called for 2-3 bananas)

# ? Mar 6, 2024 20:58

TehRedWheelbarrow: Mar 16, 2011; Fan of Britches

someone should buy you that avatar. not me though im broke.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 22:04

Hopes Fall: Sep 10, 2006; HOLY BOOBS, BATMAN!

I figured the Fourth Banana was in the go bag

# ? Mar 6, 2024 22:07

Namnesor: Jun 29, 2005; Dante's allowance - $100

Hopes Fall posted:

I figured the Fourth Banana was in the go bag

There's always banana in the go bag clicks tongue

# ? Mar 6, 2024 22:12

pentyne: Nov 7, 2012

FMguru posted:

Some finely-executed revenge.

AITAH for using my husband's affair with my cousin against them?

A dish best served cold, indeed.

"Enough to buy a house" means we're talking mid to high six figures.

Like, drat OP, keep the money but understand that cousin and her parents are going to die hating you.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 22:24

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ? May 13, 2024 22:17

Kurieg: Jul 19, 2012; RIP Lutri: 5/19/20-4/2/20

AITA for not making my son play games with is cousin?

quote:

I have a rocky relationship with my family mainly because of my sister. This has bled over into my family. My 16 year old son Jake plays video games with his friends online. Mainly his childhood best friend who has moved away. He connects and talks while playing several nights a week. Jake is a good student and does band and his debate team so I don�t paythis free time much attention.

My sister and her son Kyle (10) who live with my mom have started poo poo because Jake blocked Kyle from playing with him. Jake isn�t close to Kyle and maybe sees my side of the family twice a year. Jake said Kyle was annoying and his friends didn�t want to play with him so he blocked him because he kept trying to join the game.

I only heard this after both my sister and mom complained about Jake and his friends leaving Kyle out. My sister tried the single mom card with me saying it keeps Kyle busy while she does things. I told her if she wanted to use Jake and his friends as free babysitters she should pay them and he doesn�t owe Kyle his free time.

My mom who also has boundary issues said Jake doesn�t deserve any Christmas gifts since I spoiled him. I told my mom that she didn�t deserve to see us at Christmas because she was using her cheap gifts as a leverage to my son.

She tried to backtrack from this but I�m already low contact with them and told my family that we aren�t doing Christmas with grandma this year after she texted Jake about how he doesn�t deserve gifts for not playing with his cousin.

Mom started crying when I told her my family would be making other plans and didn�t expect us there for the visit this year. She blames it on a stupid video game and Jake being selfish and doesn�t see how my sister started this.

# ? Mar 6, 2024 22:25

The Something Awful Forums > Main > General Bullshit > r/relationships: I have nothing against this baby.

«‹›3575 »