mystes posted:

Well they're going to be "OP's kids" after they all go no contact with their mother

quote:

I'm (18m) graduating high school at the end of this month. My dad dropped the bomb on me two nights ago that his stepdaughter (14f) has an award ceremony for some competition she entered and won in another state on that same day and that she really wants him to be there. He told me he couldn't possibly make it to both and since his wife and their children together will be going, he needs to be there too. He told me he would make it up to me and we could celebrate another time.

I still live with him (not for much longer). My mom died when I was 7 and my dad got married again when I was 11 or 12. It's been a few years anyway. His stepdaughter never knew her bio dad, so my dad has accepted her as his own. And he has prioritized her a lot in the last 5/6 years. It doesn't always show in the most obvious ways but it can be felt. Father/son time was put on an indefinite hiatus and instead dad told me we needed to include her in our time together but he also spent time with just her for father/daughter time. I brought it up to my dad and he told me I wasn't exactly making an effort to be closer to her so he wanted us all to bond and didn't want me to just focus on my relationship with him.

He has attended her dance things instead of my basketball games if they're on at the same time. It doesn't matter if mine was known about first, he will still skip my stuff to go to hers.

He will take us on family days and whenever he and his wife say "kids can choose" he picks her choices over mine. He claims it's because they will be the most fun for everyone but really, he even says it afterward, anything his little princess wants.

Our refrigerator and our shower broke at the same time. His stepdaughter's birthday was coming up so he took money from my birthday fund to pay for that stuff and so his stepdaughter would definitely get what she wanted (this barbie house thing and a whole fashion set and they were I think dad said $250). He didn't get all the money back by the time my birthday came around so instead he bought me a $30 gift card for Steam when he had promised me a new monitor and keyboard for my computer (that was a gift from my grandparents).

When my dad told me he wouldn't be at my graduation to go and support her, I told him there is no making up for that and he can forget about being included in my life going forward. He told me he would make it up to me and I told him I will always come second to his little princess and I'm not going to be okay with that. I told him he's discarded me for the last time. Dad begged me to be reasonable but I walked away. Then I invited both sets of grandparents who agreed to come. His wife told me I could have come with them and I don't need to attend the ceremony but could support "my sister". I said her daughter's not my sister and I do not want to support their family anymore and I will be out of their hair soon. She called me selfish and told me I can't deny her daughter a dad.

AITA?

FMguru posted:

AITA for telling my dad there will be no making up for missing my high school graduation?

That stepmom has some brass, too.

mystes posted:

Oreos are a knockoff of hydrox and I personally think that oreos actually taste worse than most store brand copies

quote:

My wife and I split laundry work in that I bring it down to the basement, load it in and change it over before bringing it back upstairs and my wife puts the clothes away when they're done because she has a certain way she likes to fold and put clothes away. Which to me, is a fine division of labor and effort in housekeeping.

The way she puts clothes away though has very little to do with clothes being accessible or organized by type and more about putting them in order so that every piece of clothing has a chance to be worn. Clothes that are in drawers get rotated into the closet (a TINY closet in our NYC apartment) and then new clean clothes go into the drawers to await being put back into rotation. There isn't any organization beyond this, our clothes get mixed into drawers seemingly at random. Pajamas with dress shirts, sweatpants in the same place as sleeveless tees. So, clearly the order is the important factor to her and not being able to find or access clothes you want to wear, so I'm forced to look through everything to find an outfit you want to wear. Though to her, I should be only choosing what to wear out of what is in the closet.

I can understand this to a point and have said I can see the value in this system especially if that is something that is important to her. That I appreciate the level of organization and dedication she puts into our lives at home, but also that I won't be told I can't wear the clothes I want when I want to.

I'm a comfort outfit type of person. I know which of my shirts I love the most and what pairs of pants I like them with, what belt goes with which outfit, etc. However, I don't believe I need to wear them in a rotation and not being able to wear (or find) what I please is very frustrating to me.

I don't rip them out of the drawers and leave the rest a mess, I always carefully remove them and put other clothes back the way they were.

When I take clothing from a drawer instead of the closet, it instantly sours her mood and the morning becomes very tense. To the point where she passive aggressively asked "Should I just throw out all your clothes in the closet?" and has not put laundry away for the entirety of this week because "What's the point? You're just going to wear whatever anyway." I might wear those clothes again, just not that day and yes, maybe a few can be go to donation because I'm not wearing them as much (Which is what I said in response), but to me, that isn't something to get so upset about you have a nasty attitude with your spouse over it and leave the house for work in a terrible mood.

I see this as controlling and she sees my behavior as insensitive. But me wearing clothes "out of order" does nothing to our home or health, and has no negative impact on our lives other than her frustration with me not adhering to her system. Is this her being neurotic and controlling or am I the rear end in a top hat?

TLDR: My wife puts clothes away in old to new order and gets upset when I wear what I want to instead. AITA?

quote:

My girlfriend and I have been together for 5 years, living in my house. She's secretive about her privacy, even though we share a home. She never wants me near her phone. I went through it once and told her about it because she would flinch if I even touched it. She wasn’t cheating so I couldn’t understand what she was scared about me seeing. Before moving into this house last year She wanted legal documentation of our relationship, but I declined because a lawyer told me it was a bad idea. She asked for a joint bank account, which I refused because seemed like something sticky legally.

Recently, she stopped paying certain household bills, claiming she's just a tenant. When I suggested creating a budget, she refused, citing our unmarried status. I asked to see her bank accounts to understand our financial situation, and she accused me of invading her privacy. I told her that we shared a space, finances and I was her partner. She said she didn’t want a partner she wanted a husband. The idea of marriage is something I am not for I don’t see why the government needs to be in my business.

I went through her bank account anyways, I discovered she's financially well-off and bought a house without telling me. To me that’s messed up . I’m struggling financially because she stopped going 50/50. She rented out that house makes $3k on it a month. Then she’s living with me and only pays “fair market value” as she claims for a bedroom and only electricity. She used to pay water and doesn’t anymore and the water bill is very expensive. She's upset I looked at her accounts and wants to break up, but I'm confused about what I did wrong. Obviously I know I should’ve gotten her permission but, her being that upset that I know that she says money is something I don’t get. She started crying about it. I only went through her checkings account I couldn’t figure out her log in information for her savings or investment accounts and I’m sure they’re just as hefty.

quote:

My wife is currently upset with me for not taking her out somewhere cool for my birthday. That is not a typo. It was my birthday and I took her out to her favorite restaurant.

My wife has very limited tastes when it comes to food. We joke about her thinking mayo is too spicy and that she wants her Caesar salad made with iceberg lettuce instead of romaine. And maybe switch to ranch dressing.

I don't care. She is an amazing wife and mother. She just isn't a great person with whom to explore cuisine.

Our city has some really great Italian restaurants. Some are hyper local. Like one place has food from a town in Northern Italy. They use a ton of butter in their food instead of olive oil. It's fantastic. I get chest pains after eating there but it's worth it. My wife prefers Olive Garden.

Her and I often eat out separately with friends. Maybe once a month. My friends and I go exploring for great food. Her and her friends go to chain restaurants. There is nothing wrong with chains. They provide consistency wherever you go. I have had very bad experiences with new and flashy places.

The times I take her to dinner at places I like I have to spend time exploring the menu to make sure she can order and enjoy something. As long as there is at least one basic western dish she is fine. Sometimes she complains about lack of choices at ethnic restaurants.

So for my birthday this year I chose to eat at The Old Spaghetti Factory. She loves it. I'm not joking. We ate there when we were in Kobe in Japan.

She is upset that I didn't pick a place I would like. I have no problem with that restaurant and I wanted to enjoy a night out but I still messed up.

Can anyone explain why I'm the rear end in a top hat?

Magic Hate Ball posted:

gently caress Cool Whip, where's The Stuff?

Halloween Jack posted:

Quackles posted:

AITA: My wife gets frustrated that I don't wear my clothes in order.

AITA for asking gf to see her bank account information

AITA for taking my wife out to her favorite restaurant for my birthday?

Quackles posted:

AITA for asking gf to see her bank account information

Quackles posted:

AITA for taking my wife out to her favorite restaurant for my birthday?

Coca Koala posted:

Each of these three posts made me feel like I was going insane in a unique and flavourful way, good lord.

Quackles posted:

AITA: My wife gets frustrated that I don't wear my clothes in order.

quote:

My husband and two teenager sons are going away on a trip this weekend.

Since they wouldn’t be home on Mother’s Day, they gave me their gift early.

None of them are good at remembering events or getting good presents. Half the time they forget to get me a gift.

For their birthdays and for Father’s Day I try my best to make it special. So it’s annoying not to get the same effort back.

Their gift this time is not the worst one I’ve gotten but up there.

They got me a Mother’s Day card - with no message - and a cheap plastic rose - the kind you get at a gas station.

I thanked them for the early gift.

I don’t really need the clutter so I just tossed it out afterwards. I was planning on emptying the trash out later that day and but my husband saw that the gift was in the trash under some other things.

He got angry and said I was a bad mom for not keeping their gift. AITA?

quote:

Your family bought you a crack pipe. This is actual grounds for divorce in my book. If my loving husband did that to me I'd be out the door so fast. NTA

(Unless I'm picturing the wrong item but I really doubt I am. It's a plastic rose in a little glass bulb right?

ThrowRA-Border-6787

I didn’t even know until I made this post. Another kind person pointed it out.

I’ve only ever seen them as gas stations so I thought they were just being thoughtless…but the disrespect is on another level

I am shaking with fury right now.

The_Franz posted:

Grandma's secret dessert recipe taken from the side of the Cool Whip™ package specifically requires Real Cool Whip™. Accept no substitutes.

I have a recipe for the maple nut chiffon cake my grandmother would make, and it specifically calls for Wesson brand oil, because the recipe came from the side of a Wesson oil bottle decades ago (it's a fantastic cake though).

Lemniscate Blue posted:

"You put your clothes away the way you like, but leave mine in the basket and I'll put them away the way I like."

If this simple, obvious compromise hasn't been suggested then they're both incredibly stupid. If it has and was rejected then there is something else deeply wrong that needs addressing.

(What the absolute Christ?)

quote:

my wife puts the clothes away when they're done because she has a certain way she likes to fold and put clothes away.

Ominous Jazz posted:

the birthday restaurant just seems like she's mad he didn't put himself first which is legit

Magic Hate Ball posted:

Why, though? It comes across as her transmuting embarassment into anger and projecting that at him, which is bizarre and kind of unhealthy.

Steve Vader posted:

Miracle Whip calls itself "salad dressing" so it's not technically trying to be mayo. It was the only mayo we had growing up though.

My wife, from the South, has decreed that it sucks and Dukes is the only acceptable mayo. It definitely tastes better.

We have a family recipe that is known as Dad's Chip Dip, and his kids all loved it. Pimento cheese, deviled ham, and our favorite line was always "Miracle Whip to taste."

My wife proved it tasted better with Dukes.

And my mom eventually let us know that Dad just got that recipe from an old Playboy magazine.

Magic Hate Ball posted:

Why, though? It comes across as her transmuting embarassment into anger and projecting that at him, which is bizarre and kind of unhealthy.

captainOrbital posted:

Shut up, Leonard! I found your YouTube page. What's the point in reviewing frozen pizza?

Steve Vader posted:

Miracle Whip calls itself "salad dressing" so it's not technically trying to be mayo. It was the only mayo we had growing up though.

AceClown posted:

have a post title that makes you feel like you're having a stroke

AITAH: For not willing to my house to my girlfriend after she put the her house up for sale is moving in with me?

house of the dad posted:

If someone is hosting you and asks for a specific thing by name, just buy the drat thing, even if you're an "it all tastes the same and I'm immune to advertising" level of annoying person.

quote:

I then hear her say “I asked for one thing and he couldn’t even deliver”.

kdrudy posted:

He tried and they were out so he got the generic version, that's it.

AceClown posted:

have a post title that makes you feel like you're having a stroke

AITAH: For not willing to my house to my girlfriend after she put the her house up for sale is moving in with me?

Ominous Jazz posted:

maybe i gotta unpack some of my baggage but it's the pits to be with someone who is always trying to appease you

AceClown posted:

have a post title that makes you feel like you're having a stroke

AITAH: For not willing to my house to my girlfriend after she put the her house up for sale is moving in with me?

Harold Fjord posted:

Please expand on this? (For all us people pleasers)

FMguru posted:

AITA for telling my dad there will be no making up for missing my high school graduation?

quote:

She called me selfish and told me I can't deny her daughter a dad.

Lemniscate Blue posted:

"You put your clothes away the way you like, but leave mine in the basket and I'll put them away the way I like."

If this simple, obvious compromise hasn't been suggested then they're both incredibly stupid. If it has and was rejected then there is something else deeply wrong that needs addressing.

(What the absolute Christ?)

AceClown posted:

have a post title that makes you feel like you're having a stroke

AITAH: For not willing to my house to my girlfriend after she put the her house up for sale is moving in with me?