Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

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Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

I prepared exhibits for my mom yesterday. Client comes in, sees all my work done neatly and well, asks if I'm going to law school after college.

Mom bursts out in laughter.

# ¿ Jul 29, 2015 13:02

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# ¿ May 6, 2024 12:44

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

If you post the emails with a gold fringe no one can make fun of you for it

# ¿ Aug 1, 2017 21:23

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Did the person who responded put (((throatwarbler))) as the subject line or salutation?

# ¿ Aug 2, 2017 23:08

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Jaded Burnout posted:

Phew. Always a concern when you take a relatively uncommon approach

You find your own snitch, cop. Seriously though, really enjoying how we're going to be bound by GDPR and a bunch of other EU laws without the ability to influence them. If I hadn't got myself a backup EU citizenship I wouldn't be protected by them either.

Is this going to be like watching The Office?

It's not like the office because the punchline isn't that Michael Scott is super racist

# ¿ Aug 3, 2017 22:20

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

blarzgh posted:

I had a guy one time send us a response letter (we had said, "look, your client has exposure for misrepresenting the financials of the business, and our client has exposure for breaking the contract, lets just walk away") that simply said, "You're client is trying to run and hide because the summary judgment freight train is comin' down the tracks!"

We laughed pretty hard at that, and then during a deposition, one of his associates told us he once sent a similar response letter that just said:

Dear Counselor,

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA
HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH
HAHHAHAAHHAAHAHAHAH
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAH

Regards,
Dipshit.

I really wanted a sic there

# ¿ Aug 4, 2017 16:26

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Emails

# ¿ Aug 9, 2017 23:44

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Potential client is referred for wrongful termination case. You make a standard offer (1/3 gross settlement with fees coming out of his 2/3). He comes back and says "I showed it to my father and some other attorneys who said it should be 1/3 of the net". You tell the client to go with one of those attorneys because you aren't taking on a case this risky with those terms. Client responds he'll agree to your terms.

Do you still take on this client?

# ¿ Sep 29, 2017 17:12

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

ulmont posted:

https://forums.somethingawful.com/showthread.php?threadid=3301274&userid=143660&perpage=40&pagenumber=2#post475204391

We're missing the career services email

# ¿ Oct 9, 2017 19:30

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Whitlam posted:

Had my final ever law class today. I think I should feel something - happy, relieved, scared, whatever - but I don't feel anything at all. Is this how I know I'm really ready to be a lawyer? This emptiness inside?

Time to fill you back up with some self loathing

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 13:29

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

blarzgh posted:

And liquor!

They go together like gin and tonic

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 13:47

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

nm posted:

Lol, now you have to pass the bar. Or you can still quit now.

If you're going to pass the bar grab me a drink while you're there

# ¿ Oct 25, 2017 19:17

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

SlyFrog posted:

In fairness, I�ve been seeing therapists off and on (but mostly on, for a weekly basis) for over seven years. It had festered for several years before that, leading to my first sabbatical which I took due to lack of sleep (and being honest, my pretty much having a nervous breakdown). I�ve tried various drugs (including in combination) over that same time (mostly early on, when they did not work either).

Now, I�m basically seeing two therapists once a week each, because my psychiatrist is one of those relatively rare ones who also likes to do the therapy aspect of it himself (the psychiatrist and psychologist both know of each other, and are fine with the �double� therapy).

It�s funny, I actually talked to one of them last week saying that I was starting to feel like it has been so long, I must be doing something wrong or it is my fault since none of this is working well for me. I was reassured that was not the case (and that my background/history has reasons why it is so bad), that I am doing what I can, and that thinking that was likely additional signs of depression.

I dunno. I do my best not to overburden friends, etc. I know from therapy that I need to lean on support networks, etc. But depression often leaves you without a ton of close friends (I do have a few who are wonderful and have been incredibly supportive). And I worry about causing caregiver fatigue in the ones I do have, so I do my best (not always successfully) to try to limit my constant talking about it.

Hey dude just a reminder you got hosed up over a period of decades and recovery will take a significant portion of that time.

Celebrate the small victories when you can, because compared to the lowest you've been those small things are big steps.

# ¿ Oct 28, 2017 15:28

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Pook Good Mook posted:

How much did you bill your son?

A week of folding laundry and doing dishes

# ¿ Oct 31, 2017 15:29

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

ulmont posted:

This was also apparently the second interview so the first interview may have been sufficiently damning.

And yeah the entire sentence is conditional "if xyz then get me a lawyer" so the dog bit is lagniappe.

No opinion below either though / writ denied there to; I couldn't find anything useful but I didn't bother to go to any of the courthouses.

I tried this once in college - I told someone "if you researched vector marketing and didn't realize it's a scam you're dumber than a sack of bricks (it was the Midwest)"

He said that was really offensive and I said it's only offensive if he did something incredibly stupid.

# ¿ Nov 2, 2017 15:02

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Sorry if this is a bad post but I'm watching daytime court TV and this guy is suing his nephew for $1000 over a 1943 penny from the father/grandfather that's worth 40 cents (the grandfather said he would give it to the uncle then gave it to the nephew)

The issue isn't that the nephew won't return it, it's that the nephew had two identical 1943 pennies and didn't know which one was the right one and offered him both. The judge made the nephew give whichever one he thought was right to his uncle and he got to keep the other one.

What a guy.

# ¿ Nov 3, 2017 19:00

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Mr. Nice! posted:

I stopped going to them because they're just about getting shithoused.

The frat ban hosed me last weekend. I had three frat events scheduled that all canceled on me as a result. SBA can get over it, imo.

Sue them

# ¿ Nov 12, 2017 21:56

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

JohnCompany posted:

Isn't it still a few weeks early to be wishing her/him a happy Hanukkah?

Don't be afraid to branch out into other axes of marginalization to relate to people

# ¿ Nov 20, 2017 23:43

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

I got a whale burger in Bergen and it was okay

# ¿ Nov 22, 2017 15:24

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

I took a pedicab in Oslo and asked where the good food was and he brought me to a fast food burger place, that was admittedly very good.

# ¿ Nov 22, 2017 16:16

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Nice piece of fish posted:

What's a retainer?

From reading this thread it's a cap on what your clients will pay you

# ¿ Nov 30, 2017 17:15

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Nice piece of fish posted:

Wait wait wait wait wait wait hold the gently caress up. You take money to transfer cases or point people to another attourney, who is then their representative? This is allowed? That's like an automatic disbarment in Norway. I must be misunderstanding.

I think it's called capitalism here friend

# ¿ Dec 7, 2017 17:02

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Roger_Mudd posted:

Ever met an HVAC guy with all 10 fingers? I haven't.

How many fingers do you have to lose before law school is a better choice? 11

# ¿ Dec 28, 2017 20:44

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Alexeythegreat posted:

Don't they have a phone to call you?

No they have a button that pumps adrenaline into the associates' bloodstreams I thought

# ¿ Jan 6, 2018 16:19

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

I called another lawyer a liar today in court (Dallas ccl 2). He was pissed but I was right.

The best kind of right imo

# ¿ Jan 20, 2018 00:43

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Phil Moscowitz posted:

Insurance companies will require special endorsements for self-driving vehicles that will multiply premiums. Either that or there will be some kind of agreements between manufacturers and insurers.

Whatever happens will not remove what has to be the most lucrative stream of income for plaintiff lawyers in many states.

I can't look it up now but isn't Tesla making their own insurance?

# ¿ Jan 25, 2018 01:42

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Whitlam posted:

Hah.

I got the prize for negotiating the best deal.

I got her $225,000, first right of refusal for hosting season two, and a national campaign to highlight the network's commitment to equality (thus further boosting her profile, and making the network look good). Babby lawyer do good?

Depends, what did your biggest ask look like?

# ¿ Feb 2, 2018 01:30

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Whitlam posted:

The facts I was given were she wanted the job, didn't care about salary but her last role was $75,000 six months ago interstate, wanted to leverage the role into an acting career. I started out asking for $250,000, based on industry rates, was prepared to go to $80,000.

The facts the guy representing the network had were that someone had dropped out last minute, if the series was cancelled they'd lose $1 mil (so really just wanted to close the deal) and were going to pay to original, much younger host $300,000.

nice

# ¿ Feb 2, 2018 02:02

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

In that post he makes it seem like the school he graduated from said it wouldn't be a problem, then posts this:

quote:

I applied at a poo poo school and it was the only one that accepted me. They told me no problem with the bar and they even have me a substantial but not full scholarship . I transferred after 1L to a tier one school where I was told there would be problems but we will try to get you through. It didn’t work. I’m hosed.

Enjoy those loans!

# ¿ Feb 5, 2018 22:38

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Hang in there everyone, 39 pages until throatworbler is compelled to post the emails

# ¿ Feb 14, 2018 22:31

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Roger_Mudd posted:

Friday was going to be my last day but they "let me go" today. 5 day weekend. 0 case load. I'm free!

Congrats!

# ¿ Feb 14, 2018 22:45

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Lote posted:

Alternatively, post “Release the emails” every Friday at sundown so that we know when you’re dead.

Thank you for doing your part to build a veritable Dumbledore's army

# ¿ Feb 16, 2018 02:25

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Phil Moscowitz posted:

I LOVE MY JOB ESPECIALLY ASKING 80 YEAR OLD DUDES ABOUT THEY DICK IN FRONT OF THEY WIFE

Doesn't this make law school worth it?

# ¿ Feb 16, 2018 18:01

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Is it too late to avoid law school?

# ¿ Feb 23, 2018 16:04

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Lote posted:

The answer it’s never to late to drop out of law school.

I’m the one in New Orleans. I know my jaundice.

Also, tangentially related, how did I not know about this event?!
https://nola.eater.com/2018/2/22/17035996/nuit-belge-2018-new-orleans-nola

I meant for HDD91

hot dog man maybe learn an instrument?

# ¿ Feb 23, 2018 16:38

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Hot Dog Day #91 posted:

Been learning piano, that's been nice. I played violin, double bass, and electric bass in my youth.

Just remember there's no such thing as too much practice, especially with scales

# ¿ Feb 23, 2018 16:55

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Nice piece of fish posted:

I feel ya. My knee hurts like hell for some reason and my shoulder I complained about back in May is still not letting the gently caress go. Started seeing a therapist because my girlfriend is sick and tired of me being too tired for sex all the drat time, which I suppose is a new low for me. Meanwhile, job hunt is poo poo (because I've shamefully and partially realized I need to change to something less stressful, doesn't mean there's jobs to be had) and 2017 was my worst year ever for everything but my hours (terrible batting average), I've signed up and paid for a bunch of social poo poo (dancing events) that I might not be able to do and spent the rest of my money moronically on my self-build cabin.

Basically, I'm a moron. If you suffer from the same, maybe you can use the advice I got which was "mindfulness meditation and yoga". So I'm doing "mind-full-of-rye-whiskey" and "yo-gatta-be-kidding-me-a-bottle-of-red-stripe-is-8-dollars?" Although I probably shouldn't, because the doc says my liver enzyme values still aren't normal. Should probably look into that.

Need any good book recommendations? Or; my anime suggestions are to just watch every Studio Ghilbi film apart from the one with the raccoon balls and also the one with the fireflies that makes you want to kill yourself.

A grave for fireflies is my favorite one

# ¿ Feb 23, 2018 20:09

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

blarzgh posted:

Yeah, thats a real fuckin feel-good story...

I thought about it and bummed myself out at work

# ¿ Feb 23, 2018 20:55

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

blarzgh posted:

Sir, this is a Wendy's drive-thru

It's the customer saying this, right?

# ¿ Mar 8, 2018 20:14

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

Phil Moscowitz posted:

This thread needs to die

emails

# ¿ Mar 16, 2018 03:46

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# ¿ May 6, 2024 12:44

Hoshi: Jan 20, 2013

You'll go in leaner and meaner than ever

# ¿ Mar 17, 2018 21:19

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Business, Finance, and Careers > Lawyer & Law School Megathread #12: Started Out Barrister, Ended Up Barista

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