A salute to all theme parks but mostly Disney

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Tourism & Travel > A salute to all theme parks but mostly Disney

«‹›9 »

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

BlueBayou posted:

For Epcot. How do Eat to the Beat dining packages work? You eat at some restaurant and then later have reserved seating? I really want to make sure I don�t miss the band I want to see�.

Yep. Your restaurant will give you a badge with the show and time you have reserved, and when that comes you show up and show the badge to get to sit in the reserved section.

# ¿ Aug 19, 2022 16:38

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:18

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Elendil004 posted:

Without turning this into an E/N thread, the last time I went to Disney was with someone and it was magical, then that relationship ended so all my Disney memories are kinda bittersweet now. I went to Universal two years ago after they thought a Hurricane was gonna wreck it so it was pretty insane and empty. Regardless, been considering going back to Disney for myself but also because I shouldn't let that past control me...any advice for doing Disney stag? Is it even worth it? I used to stay at the all-star resorts because of the cost but might be nice to stay are a little nicer place. Terrible idea? Great idea? Thoughts? I am a little turned off since it sounds like all the new use the app to get rides and pick a park and not be able to hop like crazy are kinda ruined now but still, lots of new stuff.

I went by myself in 2019 because I wanted to see Galaxy's Edge, I'm an adult and could afford it, and I didn't need a third reason. Had a great time. Go by yourself. Have fun. Enjoy the single-rider lines, except maybe not Millenium Falcon because single-rider gets Engineer every goddamn time.

Regarding hotels; Disney's axed so many of the benefits that unless you're a $400/night moneybags, I'd strongly suggest either a Good Neighbor or completely throwing it over and staying at something that's just across the street from Disney Springs and only costs like $50/night max.

# ¿ Aug 26, 2022 01:50

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Braksgirl posted:

Yeah no, sorry, even the lovely hotels in Orlando, much less the ones by DS don't even come close to costing $50 a night. Even your run of the mill Comfort Suites across town is gonna be at minimum $100 - $150 a night.

Okay, fair, I misremembered where it is -- it's right by the All-Star resorts, not DS, but... there's a $35/night Knights Inn. I'm sure you don't get much for your money beyond a bed that has probably had its sheets washed, but.. it's there! There's also a Quality Inn right next to it that's $80/night.

Elendil004 posted:

edit: With single rider lines do you still fux with the other stuff or if you go off peak and single ride is that decent enough?

I don't know what "fux with the other stuff" means? What're you asking?

# ¿ Aug 26, 2022 02:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Elendil004 posted:

Sorry I meant like there's the new fastpass type thing you pay for and use the app for but unless I am misreading there's some other type line skips? I know it's in the thread. Park hoppers just after 2 and have to pick your park for the first bits?

Is the meal plan stuff still a thing and worth it? Do single attendees have a better chance of getting a park or is it just an they allow in x numbers for park passes and take your chances?

Okay, so. The new app is a mess and hard to recommend. If you used Fastpass before, it's that, except you can't make any reservations ahead of time, the best rides aren't on it (they're an extra a la carte charge that's available to anyone), and it's not free, so... yeah. Single-rider is a thing done on four rides -- Test Track, Rock 'N Roller Coaster, Expedition Everest, and Millenium Falcon -- where if you're by yourself or don't mind your party being broken up, you get to use the same priority lines as the line-skippers. Genie+, the paid lineskip thing, offers access to a lot more than four rides, of course.

Park Hopper is after 2 and you have to pick your initial park, yes. Also, you can't hop to a full park.

Meal plan is not currently a thing and it is not worth it unless you can get it at a discounted rate. I can go into detail about this if anyone says different, but as it's a moot point right now, meh.

They just allow in X people per day per park, so single attendees do have a better chance of getting in, just because there's only one of you. That said, apart from the peak times when you shouldn't be going there anyway, park passes are almost always available.

# ¿ Aug 26, 2022 02:44

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Jose Oquendo posted:

Yes that is an unfortunate side effect of Genie+. You really do end up tied to your phone constantly checking wait times and making reservations.

Even before Genie+, WDW's unofficial slogan might as well have been "hope you like your phone's screen". The phone is your map, the phone is how you order at quick service (if you're smart, so be smart), the phone is how you check wait times, it's always Phone O'Clock.

# ¿ Aug 26, 2022 20:23

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

couldcareless posted:

It sounds like you might have an older android phone. If you're a fan of holding onto the same device for long periods of time, I recommend looking into an iPhone SE. You tend to get way more longevity out of it.

That said, a 5 year old smart phone that's no longer receive OS or security updates really shouldn't be your daily carry

Yeah, if multiple apps have told you "hey we're not supporting this any more", that is not a trend that's gonna slow down. Time to take the hint and upgrade -- doesn't have to be this year's latest and greatest, but Amazon and Disney aren't doing that to be jerks, y'know? There's something crucial your phone needs to do, likely for security purposes, and it can't.

If you're absolutely insistent on not getting a new phone, though, you could grab a MagicBand? At least that'll get you in the gates.

# ¿ Aug 27, 2022 02:50

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

VorpalBunny posted:

No, I understand. The writing is on the wall, I just am fundamentally resistant to the idea that I have to buy a several hundred dollar device when this one is functioning just fine. The screens keep getting bigger, they don't fit in my pants pockets any more, and the device deals just aren't there like they used to. I am a grumpy old cheapskate.

But it still sucks that in order to function in the parks you HAVE to have a smartphone. And a fully recently upgraded one at that. And a portable battery, because you need to use that sucker all day. For us old (and older) folks it really complicates something that seems so simple. Just give me a physical magic key, please! I even asked multiple castmembers at multiple gates and parks, and in city hall, but they just don't print passes for passholders. Why does it have to be so hard?

Okay, so, first off, your phone is not functioning just fine. Falling out of support is a major red flag. You've got security vulnerabilities now, and when -- not if -- more are discovered, you won't get the patches that fix them. And you've been told this already, but -- you do not need a fully recently upgraded cellphone. You need a cellphone that's still supported by its manufacturer. You can get an iPhone SE or an older model for quite cheap or free; I strongly suggest you go have a chat with your wireless carrier, because they doubtlessly have deals they're willing to cut you on older models. (Which can be quite small!) Also, you really need to go to Apple. Based on the tone of your complaints, you are the absolute last dude in the world who should be messing around with Android, let alone whatever cheapo manufacturer you've currently got. You don't need the flexibility or the new features faster, what you need are long-term support and the It Just Works aesthetic.

And regarding a physical pass -- what you're asking for is the hard way. You want them to use printers they don't have to make you a pass to be read by scanners they don't have in a system they don't use. The way they do it now is the easy way. They're running everything through your phone because basically all of society at this point assumes you've got a smartphone and are carrying it around all day anyway.

Also, for what it's worth, you can get a physical pass at the main ticket booth, but it'll cost you $20 per ticket. It's highly likely you could get a working phone for free.

# ¿ Aug 28, 2022 06:05

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Is the weather stupid hot in Florida too? I�m gonna be there in eight frigging days and I really thought the tail end of September would be in the pleasant low 80s.

# ¿ Sep 9, 2022 02:02

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

hahaha loving keen god dammit

# ¿ Sep 9, 2022 02:36

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

To be completely fair to myself, I also did not expect to have access to lovely low 80s weather in Philadelphia the week I left, but here we are. Global warming is a bitch.

# ¿ Sep 9, 2022 03:50

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Dinoland loving sucks, has from day one, and deserves the bulldozers.

Like, yeah, okay, it is some sort of perverse triumph of Imagineering that they built a convincingly dingy, low-rent, crap amusement park out of nothing, complete with an age-cracked parking lot ot sit on. It's still a dingy, low-rent, crap amusement park.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2022 20:14

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Jose Oquendo posted:

Aside from the Dinosaur ride yeah it sucks. The frustration is that instead of re-imagining it as Dino-land 2.0 it's just going to be bunch of IP rides.

I like IP rides. I�m still peeved that the sum total of representation Tangled gets is a goddamn rest area.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2022 20:29

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Is there a summary of the presentation anywhere?

# ¿ Sep 12, 2022 01:01

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

If people are livestreaming you and that's not something you agreed to beforehand, I feel like it's a moral obligation to ruin their stream.

I'm the sort of guy who would assume I'm an invited guest and start talking to their camera, but I bet there's lots of personal variations.

# ¿ Sep 12, 2022 19:39

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

BadSamaritan posted:

I feel increasingly old and don�t understand why anybody would watch a livestream of a person at an amusement park

Vicariously getting to go to the park?

# ¿ Sep 12, 2022 20:18

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Upsidads posted:

Wdw needs a escape room that isn't meta like "it's Florida"

WDW has escape rooms? Boy, did I book the wrong parks.

# ¿ Sep 13, 2022 04:07

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Bottom Liner posted:

you do realize a stay at the resorts is equally to more expensive than the cruises right?

again I ask, what world do you live in?

One in which cruises are notoriously floating petri dishes and I've already had covid once, it sucked, I don't wanna do it again.

I always thought a cruise in general would be something worth trying out, but post-covid I can't see doing it until the world fundamentally shifts again.

# ¿ Sep 13, 2022 22:28

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Do Disney cruises have casinos? If so, is it as wild a tonal mismatch as it sounds?

# ¿ Sep 14, 2022 05:34

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

"Sure as you're born", in case anyone was genuinely unsure what the intended line was.

# ¿ Sep 15, 2022 21:21

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Boxman posted:

I've complained about it before in the thread. The fact that there's no direct, mass-transit way to get from the world's third busiest airport to a world famous tourist attraction is amazing. It's sort of surprising Disney doesn't just choose a regional bus operator and give them the Blessing of the Mouse (and maybe toss them a few dollars to kickstart the operation). Like, at least Mears connect exists.

I�m amazed nothing exists even without official blessing. If I had the money to fund a shuttle bus line startup, that seems like guaranteed profit to me.

skipdogg posted:

There used to be one. We used it before it closed. I think it closed in Jan 2020.

Rideshare pretty much killed it like the magical express in Florida

Oh.

# ¿ Sep 19, 2022 03:29

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

On the one hand, it's a bummer, the hotel was definitely on my list of poo poo I'd like to do if money was no object. But on the other hand, it was so much loving money. Best case was I was gonna do it once, maybe, if I retired well? In twenty or thirty years? So, yeah, I'm sad it's closing because the concept was always cool as hell, but $4500 and up for two people for two days is and always was "haha gently caress you, no" pricing and if you can't do the experience for less then that, then you can't do the experience, because -- as we've now proven -- people aren't gonna pay it. There must have been a step in the planning process where they sat down and figured out what they were have to charge to turn a profit on the thing, and when those numbers came back, that was the time to step back, massively retool, and abort if all else failed.

I saw a completely unsourced rumor in a comments section about Disney refurbishing it into an interactive experience that's always open with some places to eat, some games, and some escape room style experiences. That would be very cool, but the issue is location. Yeah, the hotel is close to HS, but not walking distance. That "shuttle service" to "Batuu" was a van ride. They could rig up a mini monorail or something themed as a shuttle trip, that would also be very cool, but everything about this idea would cost money and I don't think Disney's in the mood to spend a dime in Florida at the moment.

I think they're gonna end up demolishing, and it will make me a bit sad.

Doronin posted:

EDIT/UPDATE: Oh drat, Disney is also canceling the Lake Nona campus. Can't wait to watch governor fuckhead mental-gymnastics his way through explaining why not having another $1 billion investment in the state is actually good. gently caress those jobs, right?

I'm not gonna bother quoting it because death to all chuds but the official response to the Lake Nonna stuff was basically "far-left disney losing too much money to be able to afford building new things, sad!, get woke go broke liberals" so... more of that, probably.

CapnAndy fucked around with this message at 23:36 on May 18, 2023

# ¿ May 18, 2023 23:33

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

To me the Galactic Starcruiser seemed of a piece with everything Chapek was doing with the parks, where they still charged you a lot of money to get in, but now rather than everything after that being included, they provided all sorts of bespoke micro- and macropayment options, to ensure that everyone spent the absolute maximum amount of money they were willing or able to. And if all that nickle and diming made the vacation more stressful and the experience feel grasping and tawdry, well, gently caress you, there's someone richer waiting just behind you in line.

Just a jumbo sized Genie+, in the end.

# ¿ May 19, 2023 07:05

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Luigi Thirty posted:

Yeah, bringing back the Dining Plan, getting rid of reservations, etc seems like the execs trying to rebuild all the goodwill Chapek pissed away chasing whale money like a gacha game.

They can drag Genie+ out behind a shed and into the shallow grave where it belongs aaaaaaaany day now

Bring back FastPass, and there ought to be entire departments holding meetings where the sole item on the agenda is �how the gently caress are we letting Touring Plans eat our lunch to this humiliating degree�.

# ¿ May 19, 2023 08:18

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Hazo posted:

Anyway, poo poo rules. I kept wondering why they never used Show Yourself or the How Far I�ll Go reprise in any shows, but it turns out they were hiding in Fantasmic all along.

Only since the post-COVID rework, actually. It used to be an extended Pocahontas sequence.

# ¿ May 21, 2023 05:01

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

SweetMercifulCrap! posted:

It does that on Smuggler's Run as well. Also I think on the Space restaurant.

Star Tours too, if you get Batuu.

# ¿ May 21, 2023 10:15

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

It is legitimately wild that Fantasmic has been running in one form or another for 30 years now, and doubly so that it was originally intended to have a set end date and get cycled out like every other nightly entertainment. If they ever closed it down, there'd be riots.

# ¿ May 23, 2023 17:50

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Cais posted:

My old manager opened Fant in DHS and my favorite story is how originally at the end with Malificent Mickey was going to walk on water and it lasted all the way up until an executive preview right before public openings and someone was like uhhhh maybe we don�t want that taken the wrong way.

The track listing in the original soundtrack is still "Mickey Walks On Water/Evil Destroyed".

# ¿ May 24, 2023 18:48

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Hazo posted:

What I want to know is how they get the burning water to extinguish on cue. My wife suggested they just dispensed exactly the right amount of accelerant for it to burn for a specified amount of time, but it just seemed too perfect for that.

Gas jets right at water level that they can just cut off.

quote:

While you�re at it, tell me how the Stormtroopers talk, because I�ve been watching them for years and I still can�t figure it out. It�s not the gloves or gestures, so my latest theory is that they can mumble a keyword into the helmet which triggers the prerecorded line to play.

Nobody knows for sure, but the best prevailing theory is that it's button presses on their rifles.

# ¿ May 24, 2023 23:58

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Hazo posted:

That makes sense! So just like CO2 jets that do a quick spurt?

Or keep it up for however long the water needs to be on fire, yeah.

Craptacular! posted:

I would imagine the Star Wars masked guys work similar to talking trash cans and palm trees of the past, where an undercover CM presses buttons. They often appear to be alone unassisted, but you know that Disney doesn't send people out in fully covered character gear without an attendant somewhere.

The actors don't seem surprised by their voice lines, though, and are usually already miming appropriately when they start talking. Could be a menu in the mask's eyepiece with mouth controls?

# ¿ May 25, 2023 00:28

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Elendil004 posted:

The stormtroopers also have a huge array of lines so I think a menu would be rough.

Yeah, but they're provably pre-recorded, so that's just an extant problem that however they're getting the lines out has to solve, no matter what. It's definitely not a guy with a microphone and a voice-changer, the stormtroopers are too stilted and you can hear them repeating lines too often.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 00:55

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Hazo posted:

That�d be great! And I�d love to know more about what goes into training the CMs playing the First Order officers on Rise. They honestly seem like they have one of the toughest jobs in the parks, alongside face characters.

I've always thought that had to be one of the best jobs in the parks. You get to be a sneering prick to the guests, order them around, and mock them when they won't do exactly what you say when you say it. The catharsis factor must be off the charts.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 01:03

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Teriyaki Koinku posted:

If I'm not thrilled about Disney IPs but I really enjoy the "theme" part of theme parks, would I still enjoy Disney World?

I really enjoyed Universal Studios in Florida many years ago, mainly for the high-end production values and immersion put into everything. Hoping a Disney park would scratch the same itch.

If you're in it for the theming and production values, then buddy, have you been going to the wrong parks. There are literally -- literally -- bathrooms at Disney World with more themeing than most lands at Universal. It's not even close. Universal wasn't even trying to compete until they did Hogsmeade.

Disney is so ridiculously gung-ho with their Imagineering that when they got the idea to put up "chintzy tourist trap carnival with cheap rides" as a land at Animal Kingdom (and yes, it was a bad idea, and yes, it sucked, and by the way it's closed now and good riddance), the first thing they did was lay down asphalt, pre-crack it, and paint faded parking spaces on it. They went and made a brand new worn down parking lot because that's what the cheapass tourist trap would've been built on. They're insane. They don't stop. You'll love it.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 07:25

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Arquinsiel posted:

I'm not sure if it was just the time of day we got over there or if Knockturn Alley threw off my impression but I remember very little about Diagon Alley except "it's very dark". THe Dragon is pretty cool though.

Yeah, that was my experience too. I've only ever gone once and it was during a Halloween Horror Night so it was already pitch black outside by the time I got there and I'm sure that didn't help, but overall I found Diagon Alley twisty and confusing, with most of the buildings looking so same-y it was really hard to tell where I'd already been, and not even sure what was set dressing and what was another gift shop. Hogsmeade is laid out much better and you've got Hogwarts in the distance to orient yourself around.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 19:11

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Arquinsiel posted:

I'm pretty sure I missed a huge chunk of it looking at the map. Just did not find my way into that pathway apparently.

We had very similar experiences, sounds like. I found Knockturn Alley basically by accident, and the whole "the sky is already pitch black" thing ruined the it's-always-dark-there gimmick and anyway it was just one more really tiny gift shop selling Wizard Hitler memorabilia? The whole experience was just strangely off-kilter, and not in a fun "haha it's the wizard world, they do weird things!" way.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 22:08

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Arquinsiel posted:

One thing I did enjoy about the location outside of Diagon Alley was how subtly wrong all the signage is for London. It's close, but not 100% correct. The Hogwarts Express is the most "I queued an hour for THIS?" ride ever though.

Yeah, I didn't do that because there's no reason to get Park Hopper except to ride the Hogwarts Express, and like gently caress I'm paying $40 for one ride.

# ¿ May 25, 2023 23:09

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Teriyaki Koinku posted:

That leads me to my WDW-related question: is the Fast Pass equivalent for WDW worth the money? From what I've read, it seems kind of bizarre since you pay the extra money but still need to schedule a reservation for a ride hours in advance. The Universal Studios model seems a lot straightforward by comparison.

Are WDW parks/rides so insanely crowded even on weekdays that you need to schedule your place in the Fast Pass system? What do you usually do while waiting for your turn on a given WDW Fast Pass ride?

Okay, so, first off, if you're a Chinese national, your English is frankly astonishing. And, more on topic, I have absolutely no experience with the Shanghai/Beijing parks -- I've never been to China at all -- so I can't speak to them. This is solely WDW advice.

The FastPast equivalent for WDW is, broadly, not worth the money.

Let's knock out some terminology, because Disney puts all of this behind like three layers of obfuscation in what I'm pretty sure is a deliberate effort to confuse the issue. (More evidence that Chapek treated the parks as an oversized gacha game; this is right out of the mobile F2P playbook.) Genie is just the Walt Disney World app. Everyone gets that. It's free. You basically run your entire park life off of it, but for the purposes of this topic, it's meaningless. Lightning Lane is the special "line cutters go here" line that's entirely separate from the normal line, is physically shorter, and gets biased in its favor at the merge point. You've seen this at Universal, it's the FastPass lane. Same thing. What's different is how you access it. Genie+ is a $15-$35 (it varies based on crowd levels) per person service that lets you schedule a reservation to use the Lightning Lane for most rides at the park. You can only have one reservation at a time (with an exception we are not getting into because it's power user poo poo that doesn't come up all that often anyway), but as soon as you've swiped into that Lightning Lane, you're free to make your next reservation. Genie+ lasts for one day, and must be purchased seperately on each day you want to use it. However, notice that I said most rides. Disney reserves the most popular/newest ride at each park and does not include it with Genie+, with the exception of Magic Kingdom, which has two rides not included in Genie+. These rides offer Individual Lightning Lanes or ILLs for short, which is an a la carte purchase (with, again, varying prices, $12-$25 I think, and again per person) of access to make a reservation to use that ride's Lightning Lane. Anyone can make an ILL purchase, regardless of if they have Genie+ or not, and the price is the same for both groups. You can only make one ILL purchase per ride per day, which means that for every park except MK, you can only buy ILL once a day.

It's a predatory, confusing system. I did warn you. Anyway! Broad consensus among basically everyone is that unless you're going at the peakiest of peak crowd times, you never need Genie+ at Epcot or Animal Kingdom. They just don't have enough rides that draw super-long lines that you're going to get any sort of value for money. If you're gonna get Genie+ at all, you get it at Hollywood Studios, which has WDW's best hit rate of really good rides compared to total rides, and Magic Kingdom, which has the most rides of the four parks and most of them are major nostalgia bombs.

Now, to answer your specific questions: Yes, you schedule a specific time. When you get a Lightning Lane, you get told a time (you don't get to pick it, the app just tells you "okay, this is the return time I'm offering right now" and you either buy it or don't, and if you buy it, you hope the return time you actually get isn't later than you were promised). You have from about five minutes before that time to an hour after it to show up to the relevant Lightning Lane. Don't show up, lose your slot, too bad. Return times are indeed frequently for hours later than when you made the booking. This is indeed much less straightforward than Universal's "show up whenever and use the special lane" program.

WDW parks are usually not so crowded, especially on weekdays in the off-season, that you need Genie+. They can be. poo poo gets insane on holidays and during the summer.

While you're waiting for your Lightning Lane window to arrive, the idea is that you go and do whatever you want. Get in line for another ride, eat, watch a show, buy stuff. (Line skip programs exist in their ideal form because guests who are standing in line are useless; they're not spending money and they couldn't even if they wanted to, because they're standing still and driving your overall satisfaction levels down. You want to get them the hell out of the line and back to circulating throughout the park so you can get 'em to open up their wallets. Genie+/ILL is hardly the ideal form, of course.)

I do not recommend Genie+ at all. My recommendation is Touring Plans. You go to these guys, you give them $18, you get access to all their planning services for a year. That gives you a calendar of predicted crowd levels for the year, charts of average wait times for rides, and most importantly, lets you create your own custom "touring plans". When you make one of those, you tell it what rides you want to ride and what shows/parades you want to see, what time you'll arrive at the park and when you'll leave, and it'll give you a schedule that minimizes wait times while attempting to get you on everything on your list. It's insanely flexible -- you can tell it when you plan to eat and where, you can tell it about Lightning Lanes you may have, you can tell it to give you a break time, you can even tell it if you want to weight the plan towards less time walking from ride to ride even if it means you may have to spend longer in line, or less time in line even if it means you're bouncing around the park like a demented pinball. It'll take all of that into account. The plans, I can tell you from personal experience, work. Note that none of this lets you skip the lines -- it'll put you in the standby line for everything -- and they have no control over the lines at all, they're not affiliated with Disney. This lets you surf the already existing currents. Get there at rope drop and follow their plans and you'll have a great time. I loved it and Disney ought to be ashamed that a rinky third party is eating their lunch down to the crumbs like this. (Genie claims it can plan a day for you based on your wants, but the actual execution is "ummmm uuuuuuh maybe go do something you don't want to do where the line is very long? Because you're close to it? Also no, I can't give you any steps beyond that, why do you ask".)

CapnAndy fucked around with this message at 06:08 on May 26, 2023

# ¿ May 26, 2023 06:02

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Teriyaki Koinku posted:

e2: finished reading the post. Thank you for this detailed explanation! I've been to a few amusement parks and theme parks when I was younger, but I had no idea you needed a strategy guide just to enjoy yourself at Disney lol.

What's really sad is that that wasn't even the strategy guide. That was, like... the introduction to the strategy guide.

That said, you don't need it, but... WDW is very big, and very popular, and stuff routinely sells out months in advance and lines can be ridiculous. If you want to ride the most popular stuff without spending all day in line, and eat at the good restaurants (and WDW has dozens of amazing restaurants, as compared to Universal, who just... doesn't even try), and get a spot at the stuff with limited spaces like basically anything in Galaxy's Edge, you gotta go in with a plan.

CapnAndy fucked around with this message at 17:47 on May 26, 2023

# ¿ May 26, 2023 17:42

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

I liked it. Really surprised that the commercials and trailers have all looked so murky, because it's actually quite gorgeous. Under the Sea in particular is a knockout. I think everyone in the cast worked, and the changes they did to Eric really worked and were needed. Rather than being just something for Ariel to want because "boy pretty", this is a dude where five minutes after he's onscreen you're like "yeah, okay, I completely get why Ariel's into him, this relationship makes sense". Overall definitely the best remake they've done since Cinderella.

Specifics:
Loved that Ariel and her sisters all have jobs and King Triton is pissed at Ariel for not showing up to what's effectively a cabinet meeting, rather than some random song glorifying him for no reason.

Giving Ariel a "siren song" is... a bit weird? I'm not sure what that added, except for the implication that she ensorcells Eric on the beach when she rescues him? But it does play into a change I very much liked, where it's made much more obvious that Ursula is loving Ariel over on their deal and isn't playing fair right from the start. Selling Ariel "oh I'm just gonna take your siren song" and taking her entire voice instead, as well as making it so she can't even remember the terms, was neat. (Didn't love that they cut the entire "body language" verse of Poor Unfortunate Souls out, but at least the former change covers for it well, since Ursula can't be giving Ariel "advice" on how to handle not having a voice when she's not telling Ariel she won't have a voice.)

The other lyric change, in Kiss the Girl, to telling Eric to use his words and, y'know, ask for a kiss, I liked that one. She can't talk, dude. What's your excuse?

Cutting out the weird little squib-things that Usrula's victims turn into was dumb; she loses that cool visual aid during the song and instead Triton just has to disappear for no reason at the climax and come back similarly randomly.

Definitely missed Les Poissons. You couldn't put LMM in a chef's hat and let him chew the scenery for three minutes? C'mon.

# ¿ May 29, 2023 05:09

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

Nottherealaborn posted:

Universal donated their Jurassic Park triceratops to Give Kids the World, and are now taking it back so they can put it outside the Jurassic Park store in Universal.

That seems like a really ungenerous reading of the actual post, which says that they're borrowing it back, seemingly with the charity's consent, for a few months to celebrate the 30th anniversary of the movie.

Doronin posted:

Big agree on Cinderella being the best of the live-action takes. They got everything right so it still felt somewhat more grounded (something they've tried to do with mixed success), but succeeded in actually feeling like an old-fashioned fairy tale. I also liked Beauty and the Beast, minus Watson's Belle. I wish they had just gotten someone else to sing her parts for her. She gets outshone in that movie so badly by everyone else who had more stage and musical experience. The amount of pitch correction they used on her is super noticeable.

Beauty and the Beast fucks up on much more fundamental levels than Emma Watson's voice. Too much of the script seems to have been written to address the tedious complaints of sub-CinemaSins level nerds who've spent the last 30 years whining about nonexistent plot holes and missing the point of the movie, and it's followed them so far down those rabbit holes that now it can't find its own point either.

The moral of the entire story is "beauty is not skin deep". That's the clear throughline, from the opening minute of the prologue where the sorceress disguises herself as an ugly commoner, to the closing moment where Belle searches the prince's eyes and finds the Beast in them. Everything is built on that. This is a movie that says, not especially subtly, "here is a handsome, popular jock and here is a scary, loner monster, and if you think you know which one is the good guy and which one is the bad guy based on that description, you're loving doing it wrong". It is a plea for tolerance and looking past labels and society's superficial expectations, delivered by a gay man dying of AIDS. Its heart is right there out on its sleeve.

And the remake fucks. It. Up. Repeatedly. The village is not misogynistic, full of eye-rolling scolds het up about washing machines and uppity women daring to learn to read. The scorn Belle gets is entirely equal-opportunity; the men and the women are united in their opinion of her, which is "it is extremely strange that someone that beautiful bothers with reading, since looks are the only thing that matters". There's a whole song about this. It's called "Belle". It opens the movie. Again -- not exactly subtle. Ashman didn't have time for subtle.

From this village we have Gaston, and it is vitally important that Gaston is popular. First off, it fucks up the plot if he's not, since Act Three will revolve around his ability to have a villager institutionalized and a lynch mob whipped up purely on his say-so. Much more importantly, it fucks up the point that the movie's making. Gaston is basically the avatar of the village, all of its ideals given flesh. He's perfect and handsome and manly. He's got floozies hanging off of him, any of which he could have for the asking, but he's set on Belle. Why? "The inventor's daughter? But she's..." "The most beautiful girl in town! And that makes her the best. And don't I deserve the best?" There you go, there's the entire thesis of the movie, spoken out loud. They have nothing in common but their looks, and looks are the only thing that matters. And Gaston is wrong. And the village is wrong, too, which is why they celebrate him, and why Belle wants out.

And you lose all of that by making Gaston a weird semi-recluse who the town side-eyes, as much of an outcast as Belle, so much so that Lefou has to bribe the patrons at the pub (and, incidentally, if they don't like Gaston, what the gently caress are they doing hanging out there? That's his pub) to participate in "Gaston". It's the most baffling choice, it adds absolutely nothing and completely wrenches the entire story so badly out of true that it can never get rolling again. They don't need to be bribed and cajoled into celebrating how great Gaston is. They're dying to do it! They love the guy! He's literally everything they think people ought to be!

But no, we have to gently caress all of that up so we can devote a bunch of time to going "noooooo, Belle doesn't have Stockholm Syndrome, even though she clearly never did in the first place, please don't write clickbait thinkpieces about us again" and ticking nerd-box ephemera like "yes, it is a bit hosed up that the sorceress cursed a dog and a toddler, but rather than just acknowledging that maybe she was a random curse-slinging sorceress and perhaps not a moral paragon herself, let's weakly justify it" and "well sure, I suppose that logically since the castle is within a day's ride of the town, the Beast would be their liege lord, so ummm oops! turns out everyone forgot about that and also any of their loved ones if they were working in the castle, there, does that make things better and not actually way more complicated and upsetting than if we'd just let it go unremarked on", who loving cares it is a fairy tale.

...that one may have been festering for a while.

# ¿ May 30, 2023 22:30

Adbot: ADBOT LOVES YOU

# ¿ Apr 28, 2024 07:18

CapnAndy: Feb 27, 2004; Some teeth long for ripping, gleaming wet from black dog gums. So you keep your eyes closed at the end. You don't want to see such a mouth up close. before the bite, before its oblivion in the goring of your soft parts, the speckled lips will curl back in a whinny of excitement. You just know it.

The list of lands opened since Hogsmeade is Pandora, Diagon Alley, Springfield, Batuu, and Nintendo, right?

I really don't think we're ever gonna see another non-immersive land again. Hogsmeade changed the industry.

# ¿ May 31, 2023 05:09

The Something Awful Forums > Discussion > Ask/Tell > Tourism & Travel > A salute to all theme parks but mostly Disney

«‹›9 »