Raerlynn posted:

I feel like I already know the answer to this, but why did you not test your update statement in development?

DigitalRaven posted:

Everyone has a test environment. Some poor fucks work in places that call it "production".

GnarlyCharlie4u posted:

Ticket time!
Guy changed his password. Then got locked out because he failed at typing too many times. I unlocked his account. Locked again. Changed his password. Locked again.
He starts getting irate with me on the phone. In a very calm voice I say, "Sir, it's going to be okay. We're gonna get through this together."
Meanwhile I'm thinking, "MOTHERFUCKER IF YOU CAN'T TYPE YOUR PASSWORD THEN I CAN'T loving HELP YOU!"

Then it came to me. I asked if there was anyone else around that I could test with. "You know, to make sure that it's not your computer."
He calls some secretary/assistant/whatever in, gives her the phone, I tell her to type in his username and password. Boom! Logged in just fine.

I whisper to her softly and deliberately, "he's your problem now, hon. Godspeed" ...and hangup.
I didn't even wait for him to figure out that she logged in with his creds. I'll let them hash that out.

GnarlyCharlie4u posted:

Deputy Director of another organization that happens to need access to our ERP system.
He's important, but he can go gently caress himself.

GnarlyCharlie4u posted:

I don't know exactly whose bright idea that was. I still can't loving fathom why though.

Deuce posted:

Now, I'm not a professional IT guy like most of you, so I don't know how it's done in "the biz," but my personal rule is that if a device was ever on fire you should just replace it. This goes double for devices that carry enough current to kill you.

spog posted:

Are you going to turn away a grieving widow, you heartless bastards?

uPen posted:

A ticket came in:
I need the wifi card removed from my PC.
Not possible, it's built in. We could turn it off if you need but why?
There's bad wifi getting in.
???
I've got some minerals on my desk that stop some of it. [Points to rock salt lamp and a shiny rock on the monitor stand.]
I'll uh see what we can do. [Walks away.]

DizzyBum posted:

An AWS outage came in.

Eschatos posted:

Be careful, the hunger for more monitors only grows. I've been wondering about mounting two more monitors above the three I've already got.

Bigass Moth posted:

Anyone ever actually used a Kensington Lock?

mewse posted:

I usually end up screaming gently caress after getting off the phone with an imbecile. While the line is open I am impeccably polite

Knormal posted:

You mean... A cricket came in?

Dick Trauma posted:

I have come to accept that most of my humor would now be categorized as Dad Jokes.

Mo_Steel posted:

Cricket closed: Cold boot solved the issue.

Dr. Arbitrary posted:

tactlessbastard posted:

Cross posting from PYF:

tactlessbastard posted:

Sorry

ConfusedUs posted:

To be fair, unless it has an internal combustion engine, smoke should not be coming out of any device. Even if there's not an open flame, smoke is the result of something burning!

Thanks Ants posted:

But enough about Honda's F1 efforts

Chunjee posted:

I'm the size 72 font in a workplace e-mail.

Johnny Aztec posted:

Avenging_Mikon posted:

We enacted a new password policy today and expired everyone's passwords for everything.

Renegret posted:

So because of this post:


I decided to DVR something at work so I don't forget. (Kind reminder I work for the ISP)

While doing that, I found a minor issue with our website that prevented me from setting the recording, so I asked one of our engineers to take a look thinking it was just my computer having an issue.

It's been 4 hours now and I'm in the middle of a giant conference call and multiple e-mail threads with angry C levels over why this thing hasn't been fixed yet. All because I decided to DVR some stupid video game TV show on Disney channel about a goon who plays video games with one hand.

Dick Trauma posted:

I'm unqualified for all sorts of things and people keep giving me jobs!

Potato Salad posted:

Why didn't we just increase the size of v4 address, anyway?

Proteus Jones posted:

LDAP and LDAP over SSL/TLS

fishmech posted:

The proper response to unwarranted photoshop requests is to say "sure here's a sample of my work" and give em the ol:

Fortis posted:

The COO has asked us to report on the industry best practices for "evaluating the fitness of backup tapes." When presented with evidence that no such best practice exists, he insulted my team and demanded a "more competently done" report. He also clarified that he wants to know the industry best practices for evaluating the fitness of individual backup tapes.

You throw them away when they start having too many errors, you loving lunatic. They cost like twenty bucks.

Judge Schnoopy posted:

Staff at my organization are constantly vying to be at the end of the tech support line. They know I'm busy and are so loving cool and laid back about it, nearly 80% of requests come in with a note of "This is absolutely not important please don't interrupt anything you're doing, we're cool if you want to address this in a week or two whenever you have time."

I had to struggle when I first started to get people to tell me that stuff was broken, because they were so worried about burdening IT with low-priority problems.

It's not a 'cool' or 'hip' environment for sure (government) but this is by far the best staff I've ever worked with.

Judge Schnoopy posted:

This has a totally different context in this thread.

freeedr posted:

Hot or knot