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unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Hi I'm a man and I feel entitled to being welcomed here.

Don't you hate it when I leave the toilet seat up??

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unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
I'll have you know men cultivate their scent the way a zen master cultivates a bonsai tree hth.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
"Natural"/aluminum-free/non-antiperspirant deodorants: yea or nay?

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

KirbyKhan posted:

Every week I shave my scrote and do manscaping. Look at a flacid dick, look at a razor. poo poo does not work without all sorts of stretching and odd angles.

The only thing that makes creationism make sense is the fact that it is difficult to nick or cut your balls... But the threat is always there, and it is terrifying.
I thought a trimmer would be safer than a razor.

I was wrong.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

taco show posted:

Update: Dude guy canceled because he's "found someone (unexpectedly)"... I guess it's better that he told me instead of blowing me off but man I really just want someone to go on a second date with me I swear I use all the deodorant and shave/Nair/epilate things ugh
spoiler alert: he didn't find anyone unexpectedly.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Pick posted:

Whatever you do, don't Nair your balls.
It's not so bad if you're diligent and don't let it sit too long.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

All Of The Dicks posted:

Buncha white people ITT
All white/Western imperial ambition can be traced back to resentment over losing the racial hair lottery.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

AriadneThread posted:

Imagine if squid could fly
The Smithsonian has a hellish vampire squid thing hanging from the ceiling. It is unnerving.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Pick posted:

I have a legally tagged pre-convention walrus tusk and a large piece of mammoth ivory. Elephant ivory is wrong, there's too much risk it's recent and funding poaching. Not much poaching of mammoth though.
omg omg omg.

One day I hope I'm wealthy enough to have a big mammoth tusk on my mantelpiece.
I saw one that was a few feet long online but it was like $10,000 :(

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Pick why did things used to be more gigantic in prehistoric times?
I heard it was because there was a higher concentration of oxygen or somesuch, but that doesn't seem to make sense.

Basically I want to live in a world with 10 foot clams and 10 pound toads.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Women's Rights? posted:

sleeping pill + a beer = sleep like a drat baby

It's what I did last night and I tell you what, I wasn't sure I'd be able to make it up the stairs to get to bed, whole lotta stumbling. But I made it, passed out fairly quickly, and stayed zoned out for the whole night.
Guys, no! :ohdear:

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

UnnaturalSELECTION posted:

Please don't end up like those tcc ppl
I've witnessed simultaneous sleeping pill addiction/abuse and alcoholism in a family member. It's a bad bad mix.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
If you're not drinking draught Guinness in a bar thick with tobacco smoke then you're doing it wrong.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Goliath frogs look like they have enough meat on them to not be annoying as hell to eat like regular frog legs.

Who wants to try goliath frog with me?

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Mammoths are neat but there are a lot more goofy/cool elephant relatives we should be trying to clone, like this swagephant right here:

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Pick posted:

And technically birds are dinosaurs. Just crappy ones :colbert:.
Rude.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
I think butter in coffee was a Thing in certain places before paleo or Joe Rogan's psuedoscientific new agey nonsense. But if the idea is that the fat content helps slow down the digestion of caffeine, I don't see how it's any different than using cream.

I'd like to try it though. I don't think it sounds that gross at all, assuming you're not putting in an entire stick of butter.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
It's cute you don't think people already do that to lose weight. :3:

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
The Paleo diet is just a low carb diet with added roleplaying fluff so basically I'm starting the LARP Diet where each real world protein is assigned to a fantasy animal and you can't eat certain proteins until you're sufficiently high level (because otherwise you'd be too weak to kill the creature/monster, you see). Watch for my eCook Book on Amazon.

That's right, Ladies' Thread. I will soon be Darcy-esque millionaire bachelor so you had best queue up while you can.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

pixelbaron posted:

you could prob make some kind of diet app that does that with an RPG theme and make millions but you'll have to give me a cut of it now because i helped i'm the idea guy
You're getting Zuckerberg'd was we speak. I'll see you in court.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Crow Jane posted:

Yes. I mentioned earlier in the thread, my boyfriend's mom is not only paleo, but vegan and oil-free as well. Dinners out with her are excruciating.

The worst is when she makes little pouty faces because someone had the nerve to order something that she can't/won't have a bite of. I once spent an entire brunch listening to her talk about how awful my boyfriend was for ordering (delicious) bananas foster French toast.
Simultaneously excited to learn about bananas foster and depressed that I can't have some right now.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
I can't be bothered to cook nice for myself 99% of the time.

Why would I have french toast with bananas foster when I could have some of last night's leftovers or maybe some instant oatmeal?

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Please no one try to defend your lovely selfish decision to not get a flu shot.
(I'm also a hypocrite but I know I'm dumb and bad for not doing it)

unlimited shrimp fucked around with this message at 01:42 on Jan 10, 2014

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
I'm getting sick of French Press coffee but the only alternative is the vile poison our office coffee maker belches out.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
What's everyone's big Friday night plans?

I intend to get not-sober and watch In The Name Of The Father.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

a dozen swans posted:

Getting drunk and going to a gallery show about fonts, you wish you had my life
Helvetica!

... Serif?

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

poopkitty posted:

Can paleos eat rice? I could not survive without rice.
Pretty sure rice is verboten except in small amounts I guess. One of the tenets of paleo is that people eat an unhealthy amount of starchy low fibre/low nutrient carbs because Agriculture.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
As a male, I don't know how to properly cleanse & moisturise my face. Please advise.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Cetaphil seems too affordable. Shouldn't I be spending $30.00 on the moisturiser alone?

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
This is hitting too close to home you guys.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

poopkitty posted:

Totally. Weddings in general are a scam. So is Etsy. It's owned by self absorbed hipster pricks.

But if you want to be pretty and wear a foofy (or not) "wedding dress" than that's okay. It's just expensive. Find a great tailor. My friend found a too small but SOOPER pretty dress at the thrift store for $40 and found another one, ugly but with a neat lacy thing and our awesome tailor mashed them up and made awesome happen. She was a wizard.
My sister is getting married.

She has a kid from a previous relationship. She's marrying an older guy who also has a kid with his ex-wife. They're both working stable jobs with decent incomes, they're living together, they want for nothing (in raw middle class terms), they have enough combined savings to put a down payment on a house, and he earns enough/their expenses are low enough that he wants her to quit her job so she can be a full time mother/housewife.

... But you better loving believe she wants a nice wedding where we all fawn over them like they're two young people at the dawn of their lives, who need all the help they can get. She wants the expensive dress and the expensive rings. She wants all the meaningless gestures that maybe would have meant something at some point, but they're effectively common law, so at this point it's all empty ritual. And of course our dad insists on paying for the wedding even though it's pointlessly expensive, devoid of meaning, and they could pay for it themselves.

I guess my point is weddings are loving stupid money sinks and unless you're chaste & religious, the big church ceremony and blah blah blah is vapid and idiotic. I hate meaningless gestures and I really don't understand the desire to put on a $10,000+ affectation just to validate some reality you're already living.

/en rant sorry :(

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
I hate it when OKCupid's quiver matches show me whose league I'm actually in but I'm too shallow to date any of them.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

UnnaturalSELECTION posted:

I plan on going the wear your best suit or dress route. I kind of want to "elope" because it seems romantic (and cheap)
But then the magistrate will claim prima nocta :ohdear:

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Belated wine talk:
Gewürztraminer, Beaujolais and Cab Franc or kill yourself imo

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

VanSandman posted:

Nobody cared about what either of us thought about meat anyway.


I don't like anything about iTunes at all.
Are there any Google/Android alternatives to iTunes for podcasts?
I pretty much use iTunes exclusively as a podcast management program and if I could ditch it I would.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

AriadneThread posted:

Years ago, I was playing fallout 3 and a dog in the game attacked me so I killed it and then my friend punched me for hurting the dog.
Good. :colbert:

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

VanSandman posted:

those are fictional i promise
That's what we wanted you to think.

unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008

Crow Jane posted:

As long as I'm learning something from them, explosions in documentaries are fine.
I learned most of what I know about America from Michael Bay movies. Does that count?

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unlimited shrimp
Aug 30, 2008
Family on my dad's side is German in origin but they've been in Canada since the 1780s, so any trace of German ethnicity was stamped out long ago. Canadian maritimer with a splash of Acadian now, I guess.

On my mom's side, my nana & grandpa came from Northern Ireland after WW2 and maintained pretty strong expat relations with friends and family from the homeland. My nana also lived with us since I was maybe three, so loyalist Irishness-ness was a huge influence growing up.

Also, I can't say "nana" to people outside the family without feeling like a dingus.

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