Badass Panels: An Alternate Dimension Called the Idiot Zone

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Badass Panels: An Alternate Dimension Called the Idiot Zone

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Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

I like to think that Dracula knows perfectly well that Storm (probably) can't control the sun (though she did control the solar wind once...) but thinks if she's going to show that much courage, he'll applaud it. A Good Dracula.

# ¿ May 5, 2016 22:53

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 02:31

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

It seems like Cap's shield only breaks if it gets hit by an actual capital-G God's displeasure, which, frankly, seems acceptable - it doesn't seem like it really "failed" either, Cap was still alive! I assume.

# ¿ May 28, 2016 03:56

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Lurdiak posted:

Much like Fist of the North Star, the Jojo guy was just making poo poo up on the fly and had no greater plan, so he probably just came up with stands 2 days before introducing them in the comic.

I don't understand why anime nerds think stands are so cool. I mean they're ok, but wouldn't it be more interesting to just have a power instead of having a ghost friend who has the power? It's just an unnecessary step. I always see anime nerds go insane whenever a fighting game character or anything has something that's even remotely like a stand, and I just don't get it.

Cuz it looks sweet as hell and at least in Jojo, they usually have creatively interesting powers.

The first few guys in Stardust Crusaders have kind of basic powers because... they were like the first few guys the writer came up with. Since most of them become the core cast it's not as crazy as it could be later.

If you wanted to just jump in with Part 4 of the anime that'd probably work out. But it's all good, though the fifth part of the manga had a superficially-decent but actually bad translation. (Part 4 itself has a legendarily Engrished fan translation which was actually far more accurate to what the gently caress was actually happening in the story.)

# ¿ Jul 7, 2016 05:01

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Lurdiak posted:

I know what Jojo is, I just don't know why stands are such a huge deal to everyone but me. I like Jojo because of the characters and crazy visuals, not the "creative powers" which usually just lead to a fuckton of exposition in the middle of a fight.

Well yeah, it's like American comics. But with more plausible outfits.

# ¿ Jul 7, 2016 07:14

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Elfface posted:

I do recall in Mystique's solo book she makes a fake test tube of goop in her pocket with her powers, and comments she made it the same way she does glasses and the like.

So yeah, always technically naked.

And on a DC note, given that Green Lantern costumes are projected by the ring, I wonder how often Guy Gardner showed up freeballin'...

Hal Jordan's only wearing underwear like *counts, slowly* sixty, sixty-five percent of the time, otherwise he's just free balling.

# ¿ Nov 21, 2016 06:37

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I thought Steve's thing was Liberty Bonds.

# ¿ Mar 26, 2017 09:35

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Duke Igthorn posted:

Tippy Toe saw him as a big squirrel so it's not always their most feared object. Hilariously him and Squirrel Girl knew this but just described his clothes to each other so they both thought they saw him the same way (this implies he looks like whatever but is actually wearing that outfit).

Tippy-toe and Doreen also have very similar worldviews, even if I imagine Doreen is more high minded while Tippy-Toe is just a squirrel trynna get a nut.

# ¿ Mar 29, 2017 19:56

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Choco1980 posted:

Man, what the hell was Beyonder thinking bring Galactus to Battleworld? A. He's not an Earth "villain" or whatever that is the point of the whole contest, and B. He's a drat multi-cosmic entity, the Beyonder knows drat well what he is!

What was the Beyonder's goal there, even? I mean if he just wanted to see some sick fights, Galactus is a good backstop and presumably he would be mollified if the Beyonder was like 'yo, free planet.'

# ¿ Mar 30, 2017 01:15

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wiegieman posted:

The best Beyonder retcon is that they were just loving with everybody, like they were with Nextwave.

Is that why the Beyonder destroyed Spidey's toilet?

# ¿ Mar 31, 2017 11:42

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The Question IRL posted:

Fan theory can often go in new or exciting directions. Or they are satisfying in a way the story isn't. Like how the unseen monster is way scarier than the man in the rubber monster suit.

I think the issue is for every "Chewie and R2 were probably agents of Rebel intelligence" there's a "it's all a delusion because the main character is mentally ill," a "it's a horrifying dystopia if you just THINK about it in this highly specific way," and a half-dozen "Oh yeah, those hot guys are totally eager to gently caress each other."

# ¿ Apr 1, 2017 10:33

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Roth posted:

Thanks Garth Ennis

The Super-sperm thing comes from an article Larry Niven wrote in the 70s which he's thrown in his compilation books to milk out a few more bucks from his back catalog. It's real modern equivalent would be the claspers comic.

# ¿ Apr 2, 2017 00:01

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Ferrule posted:

Preacher loving rules what the hell are you all taking about?

Preacher rules but certainly has some low points, and also it seems like Garth Ennis keeps doing Preacher.

# ¿ Apr 4, 2017 23:23

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

SiKboy posted:

How do you break a shapeshifters neck?

Prenatal yoga, apparently

# ¿ Apr 14, 2017 23:34

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Keeshhound posted:

It's just some goon theory for explaining the panel since every time it comes up people lose their poo poo over an imaginary billionaire eating steak the wrong way.

That said, I stand by my point about the locale. That chef is earning $10 an hour, tops.

Maybe if Bruce Wayne endorsed a $15 minimum wage, there wouldn't be so many chefs putting their dicks on his steaks.

# ¿ Apr 24, 2017 23:24

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

I'd say one other big difference is that they're creator-owned or more-creator-owned or whatever; basically, they don't become the perennial intellectual property of a media conglomerate. There's also a shitload more of it than we get here so there's going to be more chance for something great to emerge.

# ¿ May 22, 2017 20:23

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Lurdiak posted:

????????

Yeah I mean like, for whatever reason, they can't fire the creator off the manga, they can do other things but they don't have the eternally ongoing books the way America does and nowhere else seems to do.

# ¿ May 23, 2017 11:40

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

Malachite_Dragon posted:

You sure about that?

Yeah 'cuz "long" ain't what I'm talking about! I'm talking about how when that dude finishes One Piece, they may still crank out One Piece merch and lovely animes but they won't hire a new guy to draw One Piece - or if they did, it'd be a pretty remarkable change, as opposed to the big two American comic houses, where that poo poo is standard operating procedure.

# ¿ May 23, 2017 20:34

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Wasn't most of the Claremontism in that Storm panel because of Jim Shooter's "every comic could be someone's first" rules?

Like, on some level we could do with more of that now, I think; of course, we have also advanced in other ways, such as accepting that gay people exist.

# ¿ May 30, 2017 20:11

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Lurdiak posted:

Pretend I posted anyone even slightly tan from One Piece.

I am told this is a mistranslation on a reference to some historical Japanese boxer who had an afro-ish hairstyle. Maybe.

# ¿ Jun 21, 2017 10:07

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Is Deadpool a notary?

# ¿ Jun 24, 2017 06:41

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Lurdiak posted:

Just once I'd like Punisher or some other anti-hero badass to pull something like that and then find out they got a different guy with the same name or something.

I figure they'd just mope briefly about how yup this is why they are Damned(tm) and go on with more megagunning.

# ¿ Jul 1, 2017 17:08

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VanSandman posted:

Fear and terror of them is the only sane response, or at least it would be in a universe without people like Captain America or Iron Man or whatnot.

Why?

I mean sure, be scared of specific mutants. The analogy does break down somewhat because mutants are generally capable of causing a ruckus in a literal and physical way whereas no minority group in actual reality can do so, due to their minority status. I believe this is typically known as a "metaphor."

Now if the point is that due to the metaphor's details, the analogy is imperfect, I think that is fair to say. But you can also say that the money the Government is spending on Sentinels could be spent on basic training courses and power assessment curricula for neo-mutants, so they can join society.

# ¿ Jul 2, 2017 08:00

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Exit Strategy posted:

I'm just saying that if I need a permit to carry a pistol, maybe the government should have oversight over the man with laser eyes that can cut buildings in half. You know. Know where he lives, maybe do a criminal background check before he's allowed in public, stuff like that?

Sounds like someone hates the 2nd Amendment. Wait, hold on, uh - before we make a call here - what, uh, cultural background is the mutant in this example?

# ¿ Jul 3, 2017 08:26

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I'm concerned about Godzilla Lust. What's the title of that one?

# ¿ Jul 15, 2017 07:14

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sticksy posted:

I'm sure there's tons I just am not aware if but has Phoenix had any/multiple awesome cosmic battles against Galactus? I could see him getting kinda pissed she just overcooked an entire solar system willy nilly that he could've chowed down on.

e: ok yeah, there's loads of them, most recently in Generations

The big plot drop from a tussel between Rachel Grey and Galactus during Excalibur was that while Galactus is for the most part just eating random planets, the Phoenix is in some sense sucking energy out of the future of the universe. Presumably mostly that long gray period in cosmology where the main source of energy would be proton decay...... probably... right? RIGHT?

# ¿ Sep 28, 2017 22:01

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I imagine the difference here is that (for instance) you all know who Dr. Doom and Thanos are, by reputation if nothing else, so having them talk poo poo at each other and then Doom throws a punch and the purple one is a skeleton, seems cool and badass. Manga series don't have the same opportunity to build up that cultural freight, especially here in America.

# ¿ Dec 9, 2017 21:43

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Thrall, no!!

# ¿ Dec 10, 2017 04:31

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Vincent posted:

Manga are comics.
Comics are good.
Y'all need to chill,

And read Wally Wood.

(burma shave)

# ¿ Dec 13, 2017 12:41

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Doc Hawkins posted:

Hmmm...

Well, it does seem really good.

That's a joke! You can have a joke without calling the entire premise dopey.

# ¿ Dec 25, 2017 22:40

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Earnestness is under-rated and under-used in this day and age.

# ¿ Apr 17, 2018 08:41

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Lurdiak posted:

Yeah, Spider-man does that poo poo all the time.

Next you'll say it's derivative that Alita gave her spouse cancer with her cyborg fluids.

# ¿ Feb 18, 2019 06:28

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

The pop-culture gestalt is not greatly influenced by the books themselves unless they're total breakout hits or become movies. So you might as well write the best story you can and at most crack a side joke or two rather than being like "nuh UH, Aquaman RULES!"

# ¿ Jun 1, 2019 23:50

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Doc Hawkins posted:

a lot of comics are secretly about Margaret Thatcher

there was a whole issue of Planetary about it

Secret nothing that's like the through line for most of the early Vertigo stuff.

# ¿ Jul 3, 2019 10:38

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I could see a point that if you told me that was Sebastian Shaw or something, I could see it.

# ¿ Jul 4, 2019 03:40

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galagazombie posted:

The eternal conundrum of comics set in the "real world" is that if you have the hero solve a real problem it stops being the "real world". Now some comics like Miracleman run with that and turn out great, but then they stop being superhero stories and become more like science-fiction. Marvel setting all their heroes in New York made them more relatable and human, but simultaneously means they have to limit what the hero is narratively allowed to do.

Leave aside Superman, who you can at least semi plausibly say has made the choice to limit his short-term benefit to Earth in order to maximize his long-term benefit by not making governments his enemy.

What about the loving Spectre?

You'd think people would clean up their loving act if they knew the Spectre was around.

# ¿ Jul 5, 2019 11:40

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With regards to the Spectre I'm just going on the time he said "This man is innocent, don't execute him," and it was explained to him that he was tried and found guilty by the people of New York state, to which the Spectre's response was: "So you're telling me that the entire population of New York state would be responsible for his murder, are you?"

They put that guy in prison for life.

It wouldn't necessarily make people better, but it would be different.

# ¿ Jul 6, 2019 00:17

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I thought Blade was born in New Orleans -- just, uh, a lot longer ago than he likes to let on.

# ¿ Sep 11, 2019 06:54

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Admiralty Flag posted:

See, this is what Batman loses out on from being such a tightassed stick-in- the-mud. They do that to, I don't know, Ragman maybe? (they're especially ill-informed, I guess), and the dude might stumble around shrieking and gasping before falling down still, giving the punks a moment of glory before rising up saying, "your baubles and trinkets are but a petty obstacle to one of my power. But they have done two things, that is for certain. They have made me angry...and thirsty."

I imagine Batman doesn't pull that poo poo because even if he's in armor he doesn't WANT to get shot, while Dracula doesn't give a poo poo.

# ¿ Nov 26, 2019 23:01

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I figured he can soak up a lot of yellow sun magic and be fine for interstellar journeys. Presumably there's some critical mass of red star radiation that displaces the yellow sun magic or else he'd stop being super at night. Probably he has to actually get into planetary orbits or their equivalent.

There's my no-prize, DC!

# ¿ Nov 30, 2019 22:45

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# ¿ May 12, 2024 02:31

Nessus: Dec 22, 2003; After a Speaker vote, you may be entitled to a valuable coupon or voucher!

Elfface posted:

Also, he'd be getting back up in that ring under any sun you like. Someone needs saving.

Well yeah, do good to one another and any man can be a Superman, but you know what we mean.

# ¿ Dec 1, 2019 01:17

The Something Awful Forums > The Finer Arts > BSS: Bisexual Super Son > Badass Panels: An Alternate Dimension Called the Idiot Zone

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