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I'd like to think the plane hit some kind of magical jet stream and flew right into space. The good news is that the blue angels are back and should be on the case soon. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KH7j185hotE
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Mar 15, 2014 06:57
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I finished reading the Air France Flight 447 pilot transcript. Those guys remind me of The Three Stooges.
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Mar 16, 2014 00:53
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Maybe it's just the weekend but this story seems to have lost some steam today. If another large plane disappeared in the next day or two it'd really ratchet up the BREAKING NEWS captivation and breathe some new life into this intrigue.SuppressdPuberty93 posted:cctv of the captain and first officer going through metal detectors and getting pat downs: They look suspicious. 
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Mar 16, 2014 06:10
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At this juncture I wonder how much would it cost to put 450 ejection seats with retractable covers into a commercial aircraft of this size. If a passenger saw something suspicious they could eject and get out of there ASAP. Give them a beacon and a flare gun too. At least in first class.
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Mar 16, 2014 06:26
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PleasureKevin posted:the captain said good night to ground control and turned to his co-pilot, "sorry, friend, but this flight is not going to it's scheduled destination. I'm taking over." as the pilot began to turn the plan around, the controls gave out. the faint smell of burning electronics creeped over the two pilots. a device had been programmed to burn through the control wires mid-flight, taking control away from the captain patching it in through a radio control device. a voice came over the headsets, "greetings malaysian pilot men. this is iran. we are taking control over this flight by remote control. it's to do a 9/11 type thing. hahahaha." the pilot began to macguyver the strange electronic radio controls he found beneath the control panel. "hand me that bobble-head on the dash, co-pilot, i will use the spring inside it to--". the co-pilot interrupted, "no. i'm afraid the two of you aren't the only ones with plans for this plane. i'm really suicidal and i'm doing to crash it into the water to die." and with that he lunged for the captains neck, tiger-style. the cabin's door flung open amidst the scuffle. the men who came through wielded seat-belt extensions like nun-chuks, "hello irish. i'm the captain now. we go to america," said one. hardly anyone noticed as two well-tanned women in cowboy hats entered the cockpit behind them, "blow jobs, boys?" This is good. It just needs those timestamps like the Air France 447 flight to make it look more official. Highlights: 02:07:00 (Bonin) We seem to be at the end of the cloud layer, it might be okay. 02:10:36 (Robert) Descend! 02:10:37 (Bonin) Here we go, we're descending. 02:10:41(Bonin) We're... yeah, we're in a climb. 02:10:55 (Robert) drat it! 02:11:21 (Robert) We still have the engines! What the hell is happening? I don't understand what's happening. 02:11:32 (Bonin) drat it, I don't have control of the plane, I don't have control of the plane at all! 02:11:37 (Robert) Left seat taking control! 02:11:43 (Captain) What the hell are you doing? 02:11:45 (Bonin) We've lost control of the plane! 02:11:47 (Robert) We've totally lost control of the plane. We don't understand at all... We've tried everything. 02:12:14 (Robert) What do you think? What do you think? What should we do? 02:12:15 (Captain) Well, I don't know! 02:13:40 (Robert) Climb... climb... climb... climb... 02:13:42 (Captain) No, no, no... Don't climb... no, no. 02:13:43 (Robert) Descend, then... Give me the controls... Give me the controls! 02:14:23 (Robert) drat it, we're going to crash... This can't be happening! 02:14:27 (Captain) Ten degrees of pitch... (Exactly 1.4 seconds later, the cockpit voice recorder stops).
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Mar 17, 2014 00:43
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No. 6 posted:Fixed it more https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-2K_IqlRVnE
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Mar 17, 2014 06:35
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Daimo posted:(sound of hammers being thrown into cockpit) Those transcripts sure are great: JT: Do you, uh, live over in Arkansas, Dave, or...? DS: Naw, I live in Fisherville. JT: Aw, Fisherville, great spot. (Sounds of hammer blows striking pilots.) AP: Ow! JT: God! JT: Oh, ah, poo poo. DS: God almighty! AP: Ow! JT: What the gently caress are you doing? Rick Rickshaw posted:Has anyone considered that the person at the controls managed to pull off a Sullenberger-style water landing? Then the plane just eased itself into the ocean depths like an old man into a nice warm bath. The ocean is too rough to do that. bathroom sounds posted:How loving metal would it be if they hijacked the plane to a secret terrorist base and summarily executed all the passengers That's like 1978 Judas Priest level. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y60Mo_Nmydg
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Mar 17, 2014 21:28
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Rusty posted:New CNN theory: When I saw that last night I thought that if I had to be in a plane crash I'd want it to be something cool at least. http://youtu.be/ctHltBauGc8?t=1m5s
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Mar 18, 2014 00:12
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I know the US Navy has trained dolphins and sea lions to find bombs. Too bad they haven't harnessed the collective power of the deep sea creatures. To unite the giant squids and the sperm whales in a coordinated search effort.AKA Pseudonym posted:How much data do flight recorders retain? If they ever find the black box, will it have the full seven hours or just the last little bit? It will contain all seven embarrassing hours of the cockpit orgy. Wandle Cax posted:Well an indian IT man has found the plane 
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Mar 19, 2014 00:42
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How tall would an air traffic control tower need to be to observe the entire east and west hemispheres? The diameter of the earth at its poles is approximately 7,901 miles.Blistex posted:Article says that the photos were "old data" and not current enough to be the missing plane. Yes, I figured it was chicanery of the first order.
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Mar 19, 2014 06:12
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Also, the plane looks like a rainbow for some reason.
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Mar 19, 2014 06:20
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The Biscuit posted:lol. Thailand noticed the plane off course but said nothing because no one asked them If it was a more aggressive country they may've just shot it down preemptively and nipped this tantalizing mystery in the bud. PleasureKevin posted:They said the oldest data was February 8th. They also declined to say whether the data that was deleted has anything to do with the flight sim game. They are probably just looking for horse porn or any pro-Anwar material. It appears the horse porn radicalized the pilots. Zogo fucked around with this message at 22:23 on Mar 19, 2014 |
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Mar 19, 2014 20:49
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Bold Robot posted:This deleted data thing seems like such horseshit. Everyone "deletes data," it's called throwing poo poo out when you are done with it to clear up space. Wolf Blitzer/Sean Hannity: "Is data deletion a sign of a coverup?" Another old fathead: "It's basically impossible to delete data permanently unless you put glue in the hard drive anyway."
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Mar 19, 2014 22:23
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I've been chanting high level chakras while listening to Kylie Minogue tracks.FlamingLiberal posted:There's an article in the NY Times today about how the tech exists to track planes via satellite but the airlines don't want to pay for it because air travel is extremely safe for the most part. They could implement the ability to have real time latitude and longitude of commercial aircraft sent through iPhone push notifications on the hour. Between the doctored satellite imagery showing blob planes (because the countries have to act like their technology sucks for some reason) and the realization that the CVR may only have two hours because the pilots union said having more was a violation of privacy. Well, it's hard not to be misanthropic. Then when you realize these "black boxes" have 8-track Doobie Brothers technology inside. 
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Mar 21, 2014 22:08
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gradenko_2000 posted:Since the black boxes only have a limited amount of recording time, is it possible for something to happen to a plane, and then the plane stays aloft long enough that the moment the failure happened falls off the recording range of the tape? That's what CNN has been reporting at least. Something about pilots unions negotiating for privacy protection.
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Mar 21, 2014 22:56
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CharlesM posted:Any commercial aircraft currently flying use solid-state technology. That's good to know. CNN said they were using cassettes still.
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Mar 21, 2014 23:34
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Cartoon posted:Don't dis the mighty 8-track. I have two 8-track players and no iPods. I just want them grounded along with disco balls, shag carpeting and no pilots wearing leisure suits either. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1h8chod18bo
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Mar 22, 2014 23:08
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Bubble-T posted:haha why would anyone do this Keep hope alive. Don't stop believin' in time travel. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TjgsnWtBQm0
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Mar 23, 2014 05:07
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I heard the "black box" "pings" can be heard only within a few miles. They should really make the pings louder and have them play loud music. Another option would be to have all the planes tethered to extremely high tensile rope. Planes would never go missing again. FreyaXI posted:Think he meant LOST. In which you just look silly. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oQYwFND7rHE James Polk posted:edit: does anyone want to pitch in for a GoonBoat? BREAKING NEWS GoonBoat lost at sea: no survivors.
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Mar 23, 2014 23:33
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Tumble posted:there could still be people alive dont give up you guys. I'm holding out hope that the pilots created a solar powered plane and it's still flying around. They're going to land in a few weeks to praise and adulation: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oyFQVZ2h0V8 PS why don't we have nuclear powered/solar powered planes anyway? We have nuke submarines but nuclear planes would be a lot cleaner and could fly in perpetuity.
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Mar 24, 2014 21:59
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Party Plane Jones posted:Because when it crashes you've now spread radioactive materials over a couple square miles. Bubble-T posted:great idea let's have a nuclear powered ghost plane flying around the earth forever until it crashes in to some other nuclear plane and irradiates everyone for miles How much damage would be done compared to that of a nuclear power plant meltdown as recently happened in Japan? I have to wonder how long a plane could fly with nuclear power without making a pit stop.
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Mar 25, 2014 05:23
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Bolivar posted:Also a pretty loving good point on previous page about the Formula 1, the GP of Kuala Lumpur is next weekend so they wanted to close this poo poo and move on stuff that's more fun and alive. I wonder if they'll have a big tribute for the plane with the national anthem etc. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KNKhr_o5wUA "My country The land where my blood has spilt The people living united and progressive May God bestow blessing and happiness May our King have a successful reign May God bestow blessing and happiness May our King have a successful reign" urseus posted:Are we honestly not advanced enough to make a battery that lasts more than 30 days sending a beep every few minutes? Our technological capacity is a few centuries ahead of our ethical ability.
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Mar 25, 2014 22:49
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ex-CEO of Malaysia Airlines on the pilot and co-pilot and why the pilots are not to be blamed: "I knew them. They were good Muslims!" Apparently he's not familiar with the demonization.
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Mar 27, 2014 22:56
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According to those new maps they were WAY off. Some cartographer screwed up big time.Bolivar posted:Search planes have spotted a total of 146 726 objects in the ocean and Malaysian search boats are going through the area as we speak. According to Malaysian and Cambodian parliament as well as the prime minister of Australia, these are "almost certainly" from MH370. They have found so much unrelated trash floating out there. Someone should really clean that stuff up and pay a hefty fine.
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Mar 28, 2014 20:37
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Spaced God posted:Because that would be useful... because reasons? Live-action reenactments demonstrating all the possible theories of what really happened that mysterious night. They could also recreate all those accidents where we know what happened like Air France Flight 447. PS I thought it was stupid that CNN wouldn't show the actual simulation of what happens when one of those runs out of fuel.
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Mar 28, 2014 23:54
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This news coverage is getting embarrassing. I have to wonder how much more ocean trash they'll find before giving up. CNN might as well be going around with camera crews looking in dumpsters because they're bound to find something more interesting.
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Mar 30, 2014 22:28
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happyhippy posted:The latest theory is that the fire extinguishers were full of helium and the Illuminati operatives onboard let them all off, making the plane lighter. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1v9kK3wtNy4
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Mar 31, 2014 04:04
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How to crash and plane and document it properly 101: ?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yDu0jYiz-v8
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Mar 31, 2014 19:46
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James Polk posted:I often wonder that. If you're in the back of the plane there'd be like 1 whole second...and then nothing. There's always the afterlife: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EevFm0UnIqs&feature=youtu.be&t=15s
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Apr 1, 2014 06:17
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Fallom posted:It gets worse. It turns out there were lots of survivors but the Japanese government didn't bother sending rescuers for a day or so, and the US basically begged Japan to be allowed to send helicopters over immediately only to be denied. If someone survived this crash they'd have a LOT of food to eat. They could last for months. demonR6 posted:This would still leave a hijacking or other pilot fuckery on the table so providing help to pinpoint the location the aircraft went down is less agreeable than shrugging your shoulders and saying "I dunno?" hoping it is never found. Plausible deniability 101. Those Boeing billionaires are
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Apr 1, 2014 19:44
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Cash and Prizes posted:ft hoood I was waiting for a story to displace the airplane enigma. Turns out to be one of those old standbys: early springtime shootings.
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Apr 3, 2014 04:49
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Spaced God posted:How long do the CVR and FDR have before they die? Probably a few hundred years. A few centuries from now some advanced futuristic society will find the plane and have a paragraph or two about how earth circa 2000 was a bunch of idiots living in the dark ages etc.
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Apr 4, 2014 23:19
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myshl0ng posted:Why not build some machine that can see underwater really well. Kinda obvious no, loving useless scientists doing nothing We need security cameras covering every inch of the ocean floor. ethanol posted:Things the us navy does: This commercial told me that the US Navy is "infinitely more courageous than most" and a "global force for good." https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GmuuVGrQIVU
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Apr 5, 2014 22:43
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Cole posted:real talk why does the US give such a poo poo about a missing foreign plane People like mystery novels. If the plane crashed on land the US media would've been like: "That's a big explosion! Three souls lost  "
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Apr 6, 2014 00:42
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Fallom posted:plane goes missing and news stations get ratings showing stuff about it....just not adding up...plane missing...people interested... any help here? If another 777 goes missing it's going to be a ratings bonanza. CNN: 
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Apr 6, 2014 05:41
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If they made planes bigger they'd be easier to find. I'm reading here that the Airbus A380 can fit 853 economy sized people or like 200 Kevin Smith's. Now if they designed one that could haul a few thousand people maybe they wouldn't lose track of it.
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Apr 6, 2014 05:57
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It looks like a kite gliding in the breeze. gigawhite posted:if you really think about it we're all flying on one big space plane known as the earth This is a good point because we haven't misplaced the planet.
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Apr 6, 2014 23:21
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CNN is reporting the Malaysian gov't is now saying "everyone is a suspect" after only clearing everyone last week. Not sure if this includes people not on the plane.Dingleberry posted:The passengers (most of them) are going thru another time portal warp back to the 1800's where they will work on the railroads in the Western part of the USA. That is a ploy by the Union Pacific/Robber Baron/Evil Mustache Twirly Men to build the Transcontinental Railroad. It's like Looper or Quantum Leap. The mystery of MH370 grows daily. I'd gladly do a quantum leap onto that plane to find out really happened. Spaced God posted:Connect 4, but with plane and body parts. 
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Apr 11, 2014 21:58
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Shimrra Jamaane posted:There was literally a mass shooting in the US today and CNN still has the plane as their main headline hahahah How many mass shootings happen every year in the US? It's got to be in the hundreds/thousands I'd guess.
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Apr 14, 2014 23:21
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Breaking News: US Navy to deploy $7,000,000,000 stealth destroyer named USS Elmo Zumwalt. Maybe it can find the plane. http://finance.yahoo.com/news/navy-just-christened-most-futuristic-150000016.html  "I rely on god" x100*plane crashes*
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Apr 15, 2014 01:01
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